OT-FW: POOPIE LIST......LOL

[Guest guest]

Carol in IL

Mom to seven kids, twin grandson's and , 4 DS

" Unless the Lord builds the house, they labor in vain. " Psalm 127

My problem is not how I look, it's how you see me

If This post was MADE for the pecan list!!! ;-)-----Original

Message-----

From: DTroll

Sent: Thursday, December 02, 2004 8:40 AM

To: doihavtasay@...

Subject: POOPIE LIST......LOL

The Poopie List

Yes, this is the ever popular Poopie List.

It is here by popular demand!!

Warning!! This may offend grown adults!!

POOPIE LIST

THE GHOST POOPIE

The kind where you feel poopie come out, see poopie on the toilet

paper, but there's no poopie in the bowl.

THE CLEAN POOPIE

The kind where you feel poopie come out, see poopie in the bowl,

but there's no poopie on the toilet paper.

THE WET POOPIE

You wipe your tushie fifty times and it still feels unwiped. So you

end up putting toilet paper between your tushie and your underwear so

you don't ruin them with those dreadful skid marks.

THE SECOND WAVE POOPIE

This poopie happens when you've finished, your pants are up to your

knees, and you suddenly realize you have to poopie some more.

THE BRAIN HEMORRHAGE THROUGH YOUR NOSE POOPIE

Also known as " Pop a Vein in your Forehead Poopie " . You have to

strain so much to get it out that you turn purple and practically have

a stroke.

THE CORN POOPIE

No explanation necessary.

THE LINCOLN LOG POOPIE

The kind of poopie that's so enormous you're afraid to flush it

down without first breaking it up into little pieces with the toilet

brush.

THE NOTORIOUS DRINKER POOPIE

The kind of poopie you have the morning after a long night of

drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the tread mark left on the

bottom of the toilet bowl after you flush.

THE " GEE, I REALLY WISH I COULD POOPIE " POOPIE-

The kind where you want to poopie, but even after straining your

guts out, all you can do is sit on the toilet, cramped and passing gas.

THE WET CHEEKS POOPIE

Also known as the " Power Dump " . That's the kind that comes out of your

tushie so fast that your cheeks get splashed with the toilet water.

THE LIQUID POOPIE

That's the kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots out of your

tushie, splashes all over the side of the toilet bowl and, at the same

time, chronically burns your tender poop-chute.

THE MEXICAN FOOD POOPIE

A class all its own.

THE CROWD PLEASER

This poopie is so intriguing in size and/or appearance that you

have to show it to someone before flushing.

THE MOOD ENHANCER

This poopie occurs after a lengthy period of constipation, thereby

allowing you to be your old self again.

THE RITUAL

This poopie occurs at the same time each day and is accomplished with

the aid of a newspaper.

THE GUINNESS BOOK OF RECORDS POOPIE

A poopie so noteworthy it should be recorded for future generations.

THE AFTERSHOCK POOPIE

This poopie has an odor so powerful than anyone entering the

vicinity within the next 7 hours is affected.

THE " HONEYMOON'S OVER " POOPIE

This is any poopie created in the presence of another person.

THE GROANER

A poopie so huge it cannot exit without vocal assistance.

THE FLOATER

Characterized by its float ability, this poopie has been known to

resurface after many flushings.

THE RANGER

A poopie which refuses to let go. It is usually necessary to

engage in a rocking or bouncing motion, but quite often the only

solution is to push it away with a small piece of toilet paper.

THE PHANTOM POOPIE

This appears in the toilet mysteriously and no one will admit to

putting it there.

THE PEEK-A-BOO POOPIE

Now you see it, now you don't. This poopie is playing games with

you. Requires patience and muscle control.

THE BOMBSHELL

A poopie that comes as a complete surprise at a time that is either

inappropriate to poopie (i.e.. during lovemaking or a root canal) or

you are nowhere near pooping facilities.

THE SNAKE CHARMER

A long skinny poopie which has managed to coil itself into a

frightening position - usually harmless.

THE OLYMPIC POOPIE

This poopie occurs exactly one hour prior to the start of any

competitive event in which you are entered and bears a close

resemblance to the Drinker's Poopie.

THE BACK-TO-NATURE POOPIE

This poopie may be of any variety but is always deposited either in

the woods or while hiding behind the passenger side of your car.

THE PEBBLES-FROM-HEAVEN POOPIE

An adorable collection of small poopies in a cluster, often a gift

from God when you actually CAN'T poopie.

PREMEDITATED POOPIE

Laxative induced. Doesn't count.

POOPIEZOPHERENIA

Fear of pooping - can be fatal!

ENERGIZER vs. DURACELL POOPIE

Also known as a " Still Going " poopie.

THE POWER DUMP POOPIE

The kind that comes out so fast, you barely get your pants down

when you're done.

THE LIQUID PLUMBER POOPIE

This kind of poopie is so big it plugs up the toilet and it

overflows all over the floor. (You should have followed the advice from

the Lincoln Log Poopie.)

THE SPINAL TAP POOPIE

The kind of poopie that hurts so much coming out, you'd swear it's got

to be coming out sideways.

THE " I THINK I'M GIVING BIRTH " POOPIE

Similar to the Lincoln Log and The Spinal Tap Poopies. The shape

and size of the poopie resembles a spray paint can. Vacuous air space

remains in the rectum for some time afterwards.

THE PORRIDGE POOPIE

The type that comes out like toothpaste, and just keeps on coming. You

have two choices: (a) flush and keep going, or ( risk it piling up to

your tushie while you sit there helpless.

THE " I'M GOING TO CHEW MY FOOD BETTER " POOPIE

When the bag of Doritos you ate last night lacerates the insides of

your rectum on the way out in the morning.

THE " I THINK I'M TURNING INTO A BUNNY " POOPIE

When you drop lots of cute, little round ones that look like

marbles and make tiny splashing sounds when they hit the water.

THE " WHAT THE HECK DIED IN HERE? " POOPIE

Also sometimes referred to as The Toxic Dump. Of course you don't warn

anyone of the poisonous bathroom odor. Instead, you stand innocently

near the door and enjoy the show as they run out gagging and gasping for

air.

THE " I JUST KNOW THERE'S A POOPIE STILL DANGLING THERE " POOPIE

Where you just sit there patiently and wait for the last cling-on

to drop off because if you wipe now, it's going to smear all over the

place.

[Guest guest]

> Subject: POOPIE LIST......LOL

Carol, you must be pooped! LOL

Carol F.

Toronto, Celiac, SCD 4 yrs.

[Guest guest]

LOL!!!! You guys are nuts!!

Thanks for the much needed laugh.

32, Celiac, GF since 7-04, insulin resistant/ovarian cysts, gastroparesis, heart

patient since '82. In the gathering info/experimenting with recipes stage of the

diet. Hope to begin SCD soon.

POOPIE LIST......LOL

Carol, you must be pooped! LOL

Carol F.

Toronto, Celiac, SCD 4 yrs.

For information on the Specific Carbohydrate Diet, please read the book

_Breaking the Vicious Cycle_ by Elaine Gottschall and read the following

websites:

http://www.breakingtheviciouscycle.info<http://www.breakingtheviciouscycle.info/\

>

and

http://www.pecanbread.com<http://www.pecanbread.com/>

[Guest guest]

LOL! I almost sent it to my brother, but I would have gotten the same rundown.

Too funny!!

OT-FW: POOPIE LIST......LOL

This is off topic? Seems on topic to me. HAAHAAA

I just sent this to my husband.

I have a feeling that from now on I'm going to get a daily rundown of which

poopie he's done that day.

Robbie

The Poopie List

Yes, this is the ever popular Poopie List.

It is here by popular demand!!

Warning!! This may offend grown adults!!

POOPIE LIST

THE GHOST POOPIE

The kind where you feel poopie come out, see poopie on the toilet

paper, but there's no poopie in the bowl.

THE CLEAN POOPIE

The kind where you feel poopie come out, see poopie in the bowl,

but there's no poopie on the toilet paper.

THE WET POOPIE

You wipe your tushie fifty times and it still feels unwiped. So you

end up putting toilet paper between your tushie and your underwear so

you don't ruin them with those dreadful skid marks.

THE SECOND WAVE POOPIE

This poopie happens when you've finished, your pants are up to your

knees, and you suddenly realize you have to poopie some more.

THE BRAIN HEMORRHAGE THROUGH YOUR NOSE POOPIE

Also known as " Pop a Vein in your Forehead Poopie " . You have to

strain so much to get it out that you turn purple and practically have

a stroke.

THE CORN POOPIE

No explanation necessary.

THE LINCOLN LOG POOPIE

The kind of poopie that's so enormous you're afraid to flush it

down without first breaking it up into little pieces with the toilet

brush.

THE NOTORIOUS DRINKER POOPIE

The kind of poopie you have the morning after a long night of

drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the tread mark left on the

bottom of the toilet bowl after you flush.

THE " GEE, I REALLY WISH I COULD POOPIE " POOPIE-

The kind where you want to poopie, but even after straining your

guts out, all you can do is sit on the toilet, cramped and passing gas.

THE WET CHEEKS POOPIE

Also known as the " Power Dump " . That's the kind that comes out of your

tushie so fast that your cheeks get splashed with the toilet water.

THE LIQUID POOPIE

That's the kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots out of your

tushie, splashes all over the side of the toilet bowl and, at the same

time, chronically burns your tender poop-chute.

THE MEXICAN FOOD POOPIE

A class all its own.

THE CROWD PLEASER

This poopie is so intriguing in size and/or appearance that you

have to show it to someone before flushing.

THE MOOD ENHANCER

This poopie occurs after a lengthy period of constipation, thereby

allowing you to be your old self again.

THE RITUAL

This poopie occurs at the same time each day and is accomplished with

the aid of a newspaper.

THE GUINNESS BOOK OF RECORDS POOPIE

A poopie so noteworthy it should be recorded for future generations.

THE AFTERSHOCK POOPIE

This poopie has an odor so powerful than anyone entering the

vicinity within the next 7 hours is affected.

THE " HONEYMOON'S OVER " POOPIE

This is any poopie created in the presence of another person.

THE GROANER

A poopie so huge it cannot exit without vocal assistance.

THE FLOATER

Characterized by its float ability, this poopie has been known to

resurface after many flushings.

THE RANGER

A poopie which refuses to let go. It is usually necessary to

engage in a rocking or bouncing motion, but quite often the only

solution is to push it away with a small piece of toilet paper.

THE PHANTOM POOPIE

This appears in the toilet mysteriously and no one will admit to

putting it there.

THE PEEK-A-BOO POOPIE

Now you see it, now you don't. This poopie is playing games with

you. Requires patience and muscle control.

THE BOMBSHELL

A poopie that comes as a complete surprise at a time that is either

inappropriate to poopie (i.e.. during lovemaking or a root canal) or

you are nowhere near pooping facilities.

THE SNAKE CHARMER

A long skinny poopie which has managed to coil itself into a

frightening position - usually harmless.

THE OLYMPIC POOPIE

This poopie occurs exactly one hour prior to the start of any

competitive event in which you are entered and bears a close

resemblance to the Drinker's Poopie.

THE BACK-TO-NATURE POOPIE

This poopie may be of any variety but is always deposited either in

the woods or while hiding behind the passenger side of your car.

THE PEBBLES-FROM-HEAVEN POOPIE

An adorable collection of small poopies in a cluster, often a gift

from God when you actually CAN'T poopie.

PREMEDITATED POOPIE

Laxative induced. Doesn't count.

POOPIEZOPHERENIA

Fear of pooping - can be fatal!

ENERGIZER vs. DURACELL POOPIE

Also known as a " Still Going " poopie.

THE POWER DUMP POOPIE

The kind that comes out so fast, you barely get your pants down

when you're done.

THE LIQUID PLUMBER POOPIE

This kind of poopie is so big it plugs up the toilet and it

overflows all over the floor. (You should have followed the advice from

the Lincoln Log Poopie.)

THE SPINAL TAP POOPIE

The kind of poopie that hurts so much coming out, you'd swear it's got

to be coming out sideways.

THE " I THINK I'M GIVING BIRTH " POOPIE

Similar to the Lincoln Log and The Spinal Tap Poopies. The shape

and size of the poopie resembles a spray paint can. Vacuous air space

remains in the rectum for some time afterwards.

THE PORRIDGE POOPIE

The type that comes out like toothpaste, and just keeps on coming. You

have two choices: (a) flush and keep going, or ( risk it piling up to

your tushie while you sit there helpless.

THE " I'M GOING TO CHEW MY FOOD BETTER " POOPIE

When the bag of Doritos you ate last night lacerates the insides of

your rectum on the way out in the morning.

THE " I THINK I'M TURNING INTO A BUNNY " POOPIE

When you drop lots of cute, little round ones that look like

marbles and make tiny splashing sounds when they hit the water.

THE " WHAT THE HECK DIED IN HERE? " POOPIE

Also sometimes referred to as The Toxic Dump. Of course you don't warn

anyone of the poisonous bathroom odor. Instead, you stand innocently

near the door and enjoy the show as they run out gagging and gasping for

air.

THE " I JUST KNOW THERE'S A POOPIE STILL DANGLING THERE " POOPIE

Where you just sit there patiently and wait for the last cling-on

to drop off because if you wipe now, it's going to smear all over the

place.

[Guest guest]

Hey Carol,

With small kids in the house we get the " Phantom Poopie " . I say the

following so often that I am saying it in my sleep, " close the door,

flush the toilet and wash your hands...usually followed by who did

this?! "

Thanks for the chuckle

Sheila

> If This post was MADE for the pecan list!!! ;-)-----Original

> THE PHANTOM POOPIE

> This appears in the toilet mysteriously and no one will admit to

> putting it there.

[Guest guest]

Hey Carol,

With small kids in the house we get the " Phantom Poopie " . I say the

following so often that I am saying it in my sleep, " close the door,

flush the toilet and wash your hands...usually followed by who did

this?! "

Thanks for the chuckle

Sheila

> If This post was MADE for the pecan list!!! ;-)-----Original

> THE PHANTOM POOPIE

> This appears in the toilet mysteriously and no one will admit to

> putting it there.