Guest guest Posted April 1, 2004 Report Share Posted April 1, 2004 Sharon, I am so sorry that you got this news today about your husband but please don't jump the gun. It may nothing at all and worrying about something that you cannot change will only put more stress on you as well as rub off on your husband...and trust me, your mom will sense it as well. While I know that all of the above is much easier said than done, I am currently walking in a pair of shoes that I wouldn't want anybody to even have to walk a block in. If you've read any of my previous posts, I'm sure you know that my mother was diagnosed with inoperable lung cancer in September 2002 at age 69. My father is no longer with us so although I was completely down in the dumps relied on me for many of her prep talks and in return, she felt encouraged to fight her fight fiercely. Again, while this was very hard, I still had my " rock " to lean on...my at the time 49 year old husband Bert. In July/August 2003 the ground opened up and swallowed me whole as my husband was diagnosed with stage III colon cancer. So I fully understand how you feel but please remember, you are not in my shoes yet and God Willing, won't be. Wait for the results of further tests (hard, hard, hard as heck to do) and spend time doing things that you both enjoy. Keep busy...watch TV (helped me an awful lot...noise factor, you know), entertain and life. When and IF, and it's a big IF a diagnosis comes on your husband, get a plan of action ready and switch into attack mode. Here's hoping that all turns out well and please keep us posted. Hugs, Monika > Well, I was trying to deal with my mom's recurrence and feeling > pretty down, but I am about to completely collapse now. My husband > went to the doctor today for a routine visit. The doctor found > bleeding and told him he had to have a colonoscopy. He also had > swollen glands in the neck and a possible prostate problem. This was > a blow that I don't think I can handle. My husband is really down as > might be expected. > > I know that I have to handle this, but it soooo hard. I don't feel > that I can tell my mom about this as it will worry her too much. I > had to let this out somewhere. Thanks. > > Sharon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 1, 2004 Report Share Posted April 1, 2004 Sharon go ahead and scream! This is so NOT FAIR!!! After you let out the frustration, then try to put it into perspective;he hasn't had any of the tests or results yet,the vast majority of rectal bleeding is NOT cancer but much simpler things like hemorrhoids or ulcers so try not to get too upset until you know what's going on. It's good that the doctor is insisting on a colonoscopy because that is the only way to actually view the entire colon and determine the problem.Swollen lymph nodes(glands)in the neck(or groin or armpits) often reflect an infection somewhere in the body and I don't remember how old your husband is but prostate " problems " come in many forms,most being simply age related and treatable.I'm sure the doctor will be investigating this with numerous blood tests,scans,etc.(if not, make sure a thorough investigation and answers are forth-coming pronto!) I'm not down-playing the seriousness of the situation,I just want to tell you....take a deep breath,re-adjust your priorities, your schedule,whatever it takes to get through these tests with a positive attitude.I'll be praying for you and I'm sure others will too. Let us know how it goes Hugs & prayers, > Well, I was trying to deal with my mom's recurrence and feeling > pretty down, but I am about to completely collapse now. My husband > went to the doctor today for a routine visit. The doctor found > bleeding and told him he had to have a colonoscopy. He also had > swollen glands in the neck and a possible prostate problem. This was > a blow that I don't think I can handle. My husband is really down as > might be expected. > > I know that I have to handle this, but it soooo hard. I don't feel > that I can tell my mom about this as it will worry her too much. I > had to let this out somewhere. Thanks. > > Sharon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 1, 2004 Report Share Posted April 1, 2004 Sharon, This is the place to let it all out. Please try to stay positive until you know the complete situation. As others have said, there can be many different things wrong that don't involve cancer. Let the doctors do the tests and push until you get complete answers. Don't let anything stand in your way about this. I am so sorry you are having health concerns coming from so many different directions. I will be praying for a quick and easy answer for your husband. Hang in there, take one day or even one moment at a time. You will get through this and being positive only helps. Wasting energy on worry when you have so much going on is fruitless. I know being a caregiver can be overwhelming but we do get through. If there is something that helps to relax you, (for me listening to contemporary christian music,taking a walk in the woods, reading or spending time with our boys), try to spend some time doing this. Focus on the positive and let go of the negative thoughts. I have learned to take each day as it comes and not to focus so much on what tomorrow will bring. I found out real quick that if I wasn't positive it affected my husband and my boys. So even when I didn't feel like it I try to stay positive around them and blow off steam when I am in the car doing errands or with my church friends,which understand thankfully. I will be praying for you and yours. Becky Beach caregiver to Jeff, diag 8/01 recur 5/03 with liver and abd mets > Well, I was trying to deal with my mom's recurrence and feeling > pretty down, but I am about to completely collapse now. My husband > went to the doctor today for a routine visit. The doctor found > bleeding and told him he had to have a colonoscopy. He also had > swollen glands in the neck and a possible prostate problem. This was > a blow that I don't think I can handle. My husband is really down as > might be expected. > > I know that I have to handle this, but it soooo hard. I don't feel > that I can tell my mom about this as it will worry her too much. I > had to let this out somewhere. Thanks. > > Sharon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.