Re: Mark is at Peace

[Guest guest]

Deidra: You are fortunate you have a fine son and that he was involved and

here at

the end. I am glad you wrote. WE(nick & I) went to his onc. today. They had

reread the

feb 27 scan,compared it to a dec. P.E.T. & SSCAN and there was little change.

his markes are up. His mets to the liver are not resectable accoring to the

surgeon.

he has four small sopts on the lung,a peritoneal mass in the abdominal region

and

a large mass on the pancreas. Right now he is on Xeloda,today his onc says

after

he gets the results of the blood tests he may put him on the Erbitux. he had

been

on Avastin. he has done the camptosar,5FU,Lecovorin,Oxi bit in tandem and

solo.

he has a Bared port (his third) He takes a pain pill sometimes one and a half

twice

a day. megace may have helped because for the first time he did not lose

weight.

His hair thinned,but did not fall out. He does have a rash,but thats a common

side effect. he is 73,drives,short distances,can't walk more then 15 minues

without resting.

Lately he has begun sweating at night. He has no fever,he stays on the sofa

but gets

up,walks,goes out for a few minutes and putters around. One of the tests that

was

ordered oday was taking a sample of he orignal tissue from the first

operation and

doing the blood work that may tell his onc.,whether or not the chemo will be

effective.

Today we had read in our local newspaper(Miami Herald) an article about the

progress

made in laproscopic surgery for colon cancer. It has improved with use and

time and

as more surgeons get certified. One of the original grou of surgeons who did

his

initial operation,a Dr. Gustavo Plasencia says he and a partner assocated

with the

Cleveland clinic have had good success and the results are about the same but

with much less hospital time and pain to the patient. His oncologist has seen

all

the things we write about,and investigated the procedures and I guess we will

have

to be satisfied with that. I think by keeping busy,and being involved there

is more

chance for success. I knw some very qualified sources say attitude is not

that important,but I disagree with that. Today we me a husband and

wife,briefly,the husband had been operated on about two weeks ago for breast

cancer,and his

wife was a three year survivor. very time we think we have a problem we find

out that ours

are small in comparisom and we thank God daily for his blessings(even though

we

intercede for a miracle-I don't find that strange,just part of the natural

process) We

are always amazed that so many people have been through so much and.like

you,still

want to ease the burden but still bear your own. Thanks for being you,for

caring and

for sharing..You will never know how good it feels to know that you arenot

alone. Thanks and God Bless you all Nick & jane

[Guest guest]

Deidra,

My heart goes out to you and your son.You and Mark have been such an

inspiration to us all,and still are.I hope you will continue to check

in and let us know how you are doing,because we all care very

much.Like Donna said in an earlier message,we're all like family,even

though we've never actually met face to face.We've shared so many

intimate details of our lives here on this board. My Hubby

experienced a pulmonary embolism the end of January,he was one of the

lucky ones who made it through okay for which I am forever

thankful.But it is so very sudden,I remember thinking'my God, I could

have lost him'like the inevitable of his disease did not exist.So,

when you say, 'it was so sudden', I totally understand.

I wish for you and your son all the peace and comfort that God can

give,you will be in my prayers and thoughts.If you ever need a

shoulder to cry,feel free to email me,I'll be here.

Hugs & Prayers to all

H

caregiver to 'Hubby'age 52/diagnosed 7/31/03/inoperable

stageIV cc/multiple mets/currently on 3rd line chemo of Avastin/CPT-

11/5Fu/LV

> Hello All,

> I thought I'd try to take a moment to let you all know what

happened with Mark.I will try to be brief.Some of it I hope to share

in the future as people need my experience.I will probably become

more of a lurker here for a while because my grief is still so raw.In

alot of ways it still hasn't hit me.I.m trying to concentrate on my

son and creating a new " normal " for him.It is difficult for me to

sort things out because our lives have been driven by the cancer for

so long.As normal as we tried to keep our lives you all know it

wasn't.I not only have the giant void of losing my husband and best

friend but also my purpose...For four years it was all about

treatments,research,doctor appointments,insurance,etc. Now when I get

home from dropping my son at school I truly don't know what to do

with myself.

> About six weeks before Mark passed away he was having considerable

increase in pain.He tried some radiation for the spine tumors but it

only seemed to get worse.He started to lose his appetite and began

sleeping alot and dropping weight like crazy.He was confused at times

and we found out that his blood ammonia was high(a sign that his

liver was failing and perhaps making him encephalopathic)He started

megace for appetite and lactalose to rid some of the ammonia from his

system.

> Our new Onc. allowed him to start the Erbitux as a single agent.The

first treatment he could barely walk.

> By the fourth treatment he was doing much better eating,walking the

dog,ready to start back at work a few hours a week.(he had been out

of work for the first time since he was dx'ed. For the last four

weeks) The morning he was getting ready for work he came out of the

bathroom and collapsed on his chair gasping for breath.I called 911

right away.He could still talk when they got here but they couldn't

get a pulse ox #.He stopped breathing in the ambulance,at the E.R.

they told me he wouldn't make it,they thought it was a stroke or

heart attack,which didn't make sense.The EMT asked me if he had been

sedentary and at the same moment I said " You think it's a blood clot

right " The E.R. team immediatly changed gears and asked me if he had

brain tumors.I told them we had never done a brain scan because it

would have made him ineligible for some teatments.They wanted to give

him the " clot busters " but when they scanned him they found he had

four brain tumors,so they could not. They kept him on the heparin

because without it they told me his chance was zero.All of that info

could be helpful to someone out there.Apparently blood clots are

common in cancer patients not only if they are somewhat sedentary

but also if they have abdominal tumors.We didn't know that.I had been

keeping him up and moving.They could have tried operating on him to

remove the clot but it had broken up into alot of peices.I spoke to

two surgeons and both of them thought his chances of coming through

the operation were about 20%.Pulmonary embolism operations apparently

don't have a high success rate

>

> I will share the rest of the story another time.He came off the

respirator two days later and died peacefully with myself,his Mom and

Dad and brother by his side.I had a tape recording of our son singing

to him there also.I know he is at peace and in this I try to take

comfort but my son and I are so sad.

>

> Thanks to all of you who have helped us on our journey and peace to

you and your families.

> Love,

> Deidra(Mark's Wife)

> Mark is at Peace

>

>

> My Dear Friends,

> It is with great pain that I report that my wonderful husband has

passed away.To say it was sudden may sound silly to some but I know

you all understand that.I will soon share the details with you all

and try to get back on the board to help others beat this beast.For

now my son and I are trying to get from day to day.The memorial

service is tomorrow and I have listed the Colon Cancer Alliance in

lieu of flowers.The obituary can be found at www.sun-sentinel.com

Sunday April 25th.

>

> Thanks to all of you for your constant support and I hope he and

can finally meet,because we owe the last two years to him and

this board. I know Mark is at peace.

>

> With great Sadness,

> Mark's Wife (Deidra)

>

>