Guest guest Posted March 25, 2004 Report Share Posted March 25, 2004 : You have a burden that is difficult to carry,glad you are trying the Avastin,it did work with the Camptosar(cpt11) for Nick,it lasted about 6/8 months. So I hope that will ease the pain a bit. Have you considered hospice at all,it's difficult but they are so good,you need a little break to regain your strenght and to renew your spirit. We will all be prayig for you both and since this is the season of spring,of rebirth I hope you read Bett's " I Wish for you.....she put it ever so eloquently but simply Nick & Jane Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 25, 2004 Report Share Posted March 25, 2004 : You have a burden that is difficult to carry,glad you are trying the Avastin,it did work with the Camptosar(cpt11) for Nick,it lasted about 6/8 months. So I hope that will ease the pain a bit. Have you considered hospice at all,it's difficult but they are so good,you need a little break to regain your strenght and to renew your spirit. We will all be prayig for you both and since this is the season of spring,of rebirth I hope you read Bett's " I Wish for you.....she put it ever so eloquently but simply Nick & Jane Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 25, 2004 Report Share Posted March 25, 2004 : You have a burden that is difficult to carry,glad you are trying the Avastin,it did work with the Camptosar(cpt11) for Nick,it lasted about 6/8 months. So I hope that will ease the pain a bit. Have you considered hospice at all,it's difficult but they are so good,you need a little break to regain your strenght and to renew your spirit. We will all be prayig for you both and since this is the season of spring,of rebirth I hope you read Bett's " I Wish for you.....she put it ever so eloquently but simply Nick & Jane Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 25, 2004 Report Share Posted March 25, 2004 What beautiful wors, a really lovely sentiment Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 25, 2004 Report Share Posted March 25, 2004 What beautiful wors, a really lovely sentiment Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 25, 2004 Report Share Posted March 25, 2004 What beautiful wors, a really lovely sentiment Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 Dearest : You are not loosing it. You are merely being the courageous and strong HUMAN BEING that you are. I too have broken down many times including infront of our son who is 27 but it is so difficult to continuously maintain that stiff upper lip. Allow yourself to be human and don't be so hard on yourself for doing what is a very natural thing to do. To watch someone that you love so dearly suffer in any way, shape, or form is one of the hardest things anyone will ever have to do and I'm sure your husband is so very grateful for all your strength and support that you have provided. Have faith in God and in His ways, although they may not always be clear to us, and I pray that some more good times are still ahead for you and your husband. Lots of Love, Monika > I've been unable to post for a while and actually just read a ton of > messages today., I was so sorry to read of your loss,my prayers > are with you.And to Donna and Deidra, I admire your strength through > these tough times, I do so hope and pray that things improve soon and > you'll have more good days to share.I especially loved Donna's > explaination of 'wonderful,by choice'. Now for the update on hubby: > Basically, he's been fading before my eyes for the past month.We had > an appt with his onc on monday that proved only to confirm what I > already knew but didn't want to admit.Xeloda did nothing for him and > his tumor load is increasing rapidly.CEA jumped to 1057.0!His liver > function is greatly compromised and affecting other organs.His color > is awful,grey-yellow.The onc didn't pull any punches,he was very > compassionate but honest,which I appreciate because we both choose > quality of life over quantity.He chose to try avastin in hopes of > getting enough tumor shrinkage to reduce pain(he's now on round-the- > clock pain meds)and hope for a little more quality time. He had the > first infusion on tuesday. They are giving it with the IFL(Cpt-11/5- > fu/lv)every other week and an infusion of just IFL on the between > week.I'm very concerned about blood clots with the avastin(a primary > side effect)since he had the pulmonary embolism the end of January. > The onc says he should be okay since he's on coumadin & checking it > very often.It's also the last available option for him.This is sooooo > hard to accept and especially to watch. I find myself sobbing like I > did when he was first diagnosed.I even broke down in front of our son > (he's 18)which I have managed NOT to do in the past.I hate this > disease so much!!!I even had great difficulty controling my tears > during a work meeting yesterday.I couldn't concentrate on the subject > matter at all---and I was the one leading the meeting!!!I've always > been able to separate my professional and personal lives without much > problem but somehow this is different, I just feel like I'm falling > apart at the seams and don't know how to stop it. > Sorry, I'm rambling....I just really needed to vent!! > Prayers, > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 Dearest : You are not loosing it. You are merely being the courageous and strong HUMAN BEING that you are. I too have broken down many times including infront of our son who is 27 but it is so difficult to continuously maintain that stiff upper lip. Allow yourself to be human and don't be so hard on yourself for doing what is a very natural thing to do. To watch someone that you love so dearly suffer in any way, shape, or form is one of the hardest things anyone will ever have to do and I'm sure your husband is so very grateful for all your strength and support that you have provided. Have faith in God and in His ways, although they may not always be clear to us, and I pray that some more good times are still ahead for you and your husband. Lots of Love, Monika > I've been unable to post for a while and actually just read a ton of > messages today., I was so sorry to read of your loss,my prayers > are with you.And to Donna and Deidra, I admire your strength through > these tough times, I do so hope and pray that things improve soon and > you'll have more good days to share.I especially loved Donna's > explaination of 'wonderful,by choice'. Now for the update on hubby: > Basically, he's been fading before my eyes for the past month.We had > an appt with his onc on monday that proved only to confirm what I > already knew but didn't want to admit.Xeloda did nothing for him and > his tumor load is increasing rapidly.CEA jumped to 1057.0!His liver > function is greatly compromised and affecting other organs.His color > is awful,grey-yellow.The onc didn't pull any punches,he was very > compassionate but honest,which I appreciate because we both choose > quality of life over quantity.He chose to try avastin in hopes of > getting enough tumor shrinkage to reduce pain(he's now on round-the- > clock pain meds)and hope for a little more quality time. He had the > first infusion on tuesday. They are giving it with the IFL(Cpt-11/5- > fu/lv)every other week and an infusion of just IFL on the between > week.I'm very concerned about blood clots with the avastin(a primary > side effect)since he had the pulmonary embolism the end of January. > The onc says he should be okay since he's on coumadin & checking it > very often.It's also the last available option for him.This is sooooo > hard to accept and especially to watch. I find myself sobbing like I > did when he was first diagnosed.I even broke down in front of our son > (he's 18)which I have managed NOT to do in the past.I hate this > disease so much!!!I even had great difficulty controling my tears > during a work meeting yesterday.I couldn't concentrate on the subject > matter at all---and I was the one leading the meeting!!!I've always > been able to separate my professional and personal lives without much > problem but somehow this is different, I just feel like I'm falling > apart at the seams and don't know how to stop it. > Sorry, I'm rambling....I just really needed to vent!! > Prayers, > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 Dearest : You are not loosing it. You are merely being the courageous and strong HUMAN BEING that you are. I too have broken down many times including infront of our son who is 27 but it is so difficult to continuously maintain that stiff upper lip. Allow yourself to be human and don't be so hard on yourself for doing what is a very natural thing to do. To watch someone that you love so dearly suffer in any way, shape, or form is one of the hardest things anyone will ever have to do and I'm sure your husband is so very grateful for all your strength and support that you have provided. Have faith in God and in His ways, although they may not always be clear to us, and I pray that some more good times are still ahead for you and your husband. Lots of Love, Monika > I've been unable to post for a while and actually just read a ton of > messages today., I was so sorry to read of your loss,my prayers > are with you.And to Donna and Deidra, I admire your strength through > these tough times, I do so hope and pray that things improve soon and > you'll have more good days to share.I especially loved Donna's > explaination of 'wonderful,by choice'. Now for the update on hubby: > Basically, he's been fading before my eyes for the past month.We had > an appt with his onc on monday that proved only to confirm what I > already knew but didn't want to admit.Xeloda did nothing for him and > his tumor load is increasing rapidly.CEA jumped to 1057.0!His liver > function is greatly compromised and affecting other organs.His color > is awful,grey-yellow.The onc didn't pull any punches,he was very > compassionate but honest,which I appreciate because we both choose > quality of life over quantity.He chose to try avastin in hopes of > getting enough tumor shrinkage to reduce pain(he's now on round-the- > clock pain meds)and hope for a little more quality time. He had the > first infusion on tuesday. They are giving it with the IFL(Cpt-11/5- > fu/lv)every other week and an infusion of just IFL on the between > week.I'm very concerned about blood clots with the avastin(a primary > side effect)since he had the pulmonary embolism the end of January. > The onc says he should be okay since he's on coumadin & checking it > very often.It's also the last available option for him.This is sooooo > hard to accept and especially to watch. I find myself sobbing like I > did when he was first diagnosed.I even broke down in front of our son > (he's 18)which I have managed NOT to do in the past.I hate this > disease so much!!!I even had great difficulty controling my tears > during a work meeting yesterday.I couldn't concentrate on the subject > matter at all---and I was the one leading the meeting!!!I've always > been able to separate my professional and personal lives without much > problem but somehow this is different, I just feel like I'm falling > apart at the seams and don't know how to stop it. > Sorry, I'm rambling....I just really needed to vent!! > Prayers, > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 27, 2004 Report Share Posted March 27, 2004 - Good for you for taking a bit of time for yourself as well as hubby. I hope that you have an enjoyable time. Take care, Kris Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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