My 1 year anniversary! Long!

[Guest guest]

Hi everyone,

Forgive my cross posting but I wanted to be sure to reach everyone I wanted to thank. As usual, only you will probably understand what this day means to me - my husband doesn't quite " get it " .

This is a momentous day for me - it was exactly one year ago today that I went into Mt. Sinai with the skilled Dr. Gagner and had my body and life changed forever. I am very melancholy on this anniversary for many reasons. One reason is that is was a very powerful time in my life - I had decided to finally take the plunge and do this drastic thing to myself to get control over my weight once and for all, and last year at this time, even though I was confident in my decision, I had no idea if I would even make it through surgery, if I would be " ruining " my good health by doing this, if it would be successful, or if I was being selfish - what if something did happen to me? I would be making my family sad by voluntarily doing something that may harm me. Thank God all of those worries were for naught and here I am a year later, healthy, down 99lbs and feeling confident and proud of how I look again. I will always look at the time leading up to surgery, surgery and my recovery fondly - mostly because it was a major event in my life, but also because I have met all of you wonderful people. Without you all, I would have been lost - pre-op, post-op and during the many plateaus! Some of you have become extra special and I would like to thank you by name. Please know that even if I didn't mention you by name - you all have been a source of great support and friendship.

Thank you to:

Jill - my angel and mentor in this whole process - and giver of the wonderful ice crusher!

Duffy - my surgery sister - we will be forever bonded by this date.

Patti M - who was in Mt. Sinai the same week we were and who became a local friend.

Patti S (Patti Milkmaid) - my initial consult buddy on 10/6/99 and commiserater on slow loss.

Laurie N. - another Gagner friend who lent support and who I finally met in September.

Max - who visited me in the hospital and was a great source of support.

Andi Gedlund - a Gagner friend and Mt. Sinai employee who made sure I was getting good care there.

Nancee W - from PA - a Gagner friend who I had the pleasure of meeting in April.

Out of fear and that need in all of us to do as well as others do, throughout the last year I have often felt panicked and like I wasn't doing well enough - and truthfully at 1 year post op, I was hoping to be at my goal of 170 but I am 16 lbs away - not allot but as always, the last few pounds are the hardest to loose. Not being at goal is disappointing - like I should have done better - but at the same time, I realize I am healthy, have tolerated the surgery and life post-op without incident and I have been having a hell of a time eating lately around this holiday season - so to put it bluntly, I feel blessed and like I have nothing to bitch about at all!!! I thank God and Dr. Gagner for giving me another chance at this life I am now leading as a " normal " looking person and again, I want to thank all of you for being here for me and sharing my journey. We have a great thing going here - support, fellowship and caring. Here I go into my second year of post op life!!