Venting about M's Day - Sorry, long and pathetic

May 13, 2001

Ok, today was just downright torture.

I didn't sleep a wink last night. I tossed and turned and cried all night

last night which also kept Earl awake. I didn't want to sleep in another

bedroom because I was at my in-laws' and I didn't want them to know I was

still so upset about all this and I didn't want them to think Earl and I were

fussing. When I got up in the morning Earl was in a horrible mood because he

was tired which made me cry.

Then we got ready for church. We always wear corsages for mother's day - a

rose for our mothers. I had 2 roses put on mine - 1 for my mom and one for my

baby that I will never know. That made me cry.

Then we went to Sunday school in Atlanta with all of my in-laws' close

friends. They all knew what had happened and they were so nice and wanted to

know if I was ok, but it made me cry.

Then we went to service and of course they did all the sappy mother's day

stuff that made me cry.

Then we went to lunch and I was still thinking about the service which made

me cry. Then we went to the Jaguar dealership which did not make me cry. Earl

did not buy me a Jaguar, however, which made me cry - just kidding.

Then we went to the cemetery to see Earl's little brother which made us all

cry, especially Earl's mom, which made me cry harder.

Then we went to the local nursery to look at stone fountains and we saw 2

newborn babies there which my in-laws played with and drooled over which made

me cry. Then we had to leave which made me cry.

Then, on the way home Earl was still in a bad mood and was NOT being

understanding about why I was still so upset about this which, of course,

made me cry.

Now I'm home, Earl and I are still fussing and I am still crying.

Will my life ever be normal again???

-A very pathetic Carmen

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