Guest guest Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 well... it bothered my husband more than me when I was diagnosed- he wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and not me...he was so distraught! I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was not surprised when it came to visit... He needed this group and I wish he had found it then... We are about survival. I don't think survival has a gender. Ask away, and I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your time of need. Andree www.essentialsoapsinc.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 Lea, Yes there are men in the group. However they are here for their wives, significant others, Mothers, etc. If you go to a face to face group you would have the same thing unless it was strictly for breast cancer patients. It depends on how a person has their account set. You can have it for coming to read email, sent to email, special notice, or no email. It was a man that started this group. He was a breast cancer surgeon in training and when it got to be too much for him he asked me to be his cofounder. I am sorry you feel uncomfortable but I assure you that there is no one here just to get their "jolllies" as some people say. Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com It bothers me that there are men in the group. If I post a personal question, does that mean that the men will be reading it also? It is just not my style to talk about personal things with men other than my own husband. My check up is next week. I wanted to ask a couple of questions but I need to know first if all members see this, including the men. Lea Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 , I think a lot of times the husband etc. needs as much support as the patient. Thats why I would never think of making this group for women only. If it wasn't for my wonderful husband I don't know where I would be today. There are groups out there just for breast cancer patients/survivors but being isolated like that is not for me. But everyone has their own thoughts and opinions which need to be respected. Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com Re: It bothers me that well... it bothered my husband more than me when I was diagnosed- he wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and not me...he was so distraught! I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was not surprised when it came to visit... He needed this group and I wish he had found it then... We are about survival. I don't think survival has a gender. Ask away, and I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your time of need. Andree www.essentialsoapsinc.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 -- It is rare, but don't forget men get breast cancer to. For those men that are on the site to learn how to help their loved ones, I say more power to them. -- In breastcancer2 , " & nne Svihlik " wrote: > > , > I think a lot of times the husband etc. needs as much support as the patient. Thats why I would never think of making this group for women only. If it wasn't for my wonderful husband I don't know where I would be today. > There are groups out there just for breast cancer patients/survivors but being isolated like that is not for me. But everyone has their own thoughts and opinions which need to be respected. > Hugs > nne > Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html > > Check out my breast cancer ornaments at: > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html > also check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at: > http://www.cancerclub.com > Re: It bothers me that > > > well... > it bothered my husband more than me when I was diagnosed- he wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and not me...he was so distraught! > I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was not surprised when it came to visit... > He needed this group and I wish he had found it then... > We are about survival. > I don't think survival has a gender. > Ask away, and > I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your time of need. > Andree > www.essentialsoapsinc.com > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 I totally agree with you Pert. Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com Re: It bothers me that> > > well...> it bothered my husband more than me when I was diagnosed- he wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and not me...he was so distraught!> I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was not surprised when it came to visit...> He needed this group and I wish he had found it then...> We are about survival.> I don't think survival has a gender.> Ask away, and > I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your time of need.> Andree> www.essentialsoapsinc.com > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 There have been times I wanted to ask questions of a sexual nature, but didn't because of the men in the group. Do you know the names of any of the breast cancer survivor/patient groups you mentioned? Thank you in advance. > > , > I think a lot of times the husband etc. needs as much support as the patient. Thats why I would never think of making this group for women only. If it wasn't for my wonderful husband I don't know where I would be today. > There are groups out there just for breast cancer patients/survivors but being isolated like that is not for me. But everyone has their own thoughts and opinions which need to be respected. > Hugs > nne > Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html > > Check out my breast cancer ornaments at: > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html > also check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at: > http://www.cancerclub.com > Re: It bothers me that > > > well... > it bothered my husband more than me when I was diagnosed- he wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and not me...he was so distraught! > I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was not surprised when it came to visit... > He needed this group and I wish he had found it then... > We are about survival. > I don't think survival has a gender. > Ask away, and > I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your time of need. > Andree > www.essentialsoapsinc.com > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 No I don't remember the names. But if you look under Yahoo Groups and type in breast cancer you can look through all of the groups and will see which are just for women. Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com Re: It bothers me that> > > well...> it bothered my husband more than me when I was diagnosed- he wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and not me...he was so distraught!> I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was not surprised when it came to visit...> He needed this group and I wish he had found it then...> We are about survival.> I don't think survival has a gender.> Ask away, and > I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your time of need.> Andree> www.essentialsoapsinc.com > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 , I am a member (and one of the moderators) of a " for women only " breast cancer group. It's nice to have a place of our own where we can talk about anything in privacy. No matter how much our husbands, children or friends say they understand, they don't unless they've had cancer themselves. Hugs, http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/4BCSurvivors/ > > > > , > > I think a lot of times the husband etc. needs as much support as > the patient. Thats why I would never think of making this group for > women only. If it wasn't for my wonderful husband I don't know where > I would be today. > > There are groups out there just for breast cancer > patients/survivors but being isolated like that is not for me. But > everyone has their own thoughts and opinions which need to be > respected. > > Hugs > > nne > > Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html > > > > Check out my breast cancer ornaments at: > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html > > also check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at: > > http://www.cancerclub.com > > Re: It bothers me that > > > > > > well... > > it bothered my husband more than me when I was diagnosed- he > wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and not > me...he was so distraught! > > I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was not > surprised when it came to visit... > > He needed this group and I wish he had found it then... > > We are about survival. > > I don't think survival has a gender. > > Ask away, and > > I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your time of > need. > > Andree > > www.essentialsoapsinc.com > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 dianaacree wrote: > There have been times I wanted to ask questions of a sexual nature, > but didn't because of the men in the group. Do you know the names of > any of the breast cancer survivor/patient groups you mentioned? > Thank you in advance. I didn't want to address this, on the group(I have replied once but, privately). Now I feel I have to. I didn't join this group to be condemned for, being a man. I joined this group for support, from the only people that could, in my opinion, really understand because, their own spouses feeling the same as me. Yes, I could talk to a bunch of men but, they would not understand my life experiences as a woman would. I am not a 'troll'. I am not a sexual pervert. I am engaged to a woman who, while not having been 'officially' diagnosed, yet, the possibility still looms on the horizon since, the appointment is not till Wednesday. Additionally, Breast Cancer runs in her family. As I mentioned, at least once already, by members of this group telling their situations/experiences, it helps remind me, that, she is not alone. I know that I am alone because, men just won't talk about. I guess I am a hinderance to you expressing, what you are going through. I guess, what a man goes through emotionally doesn't matter to you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 13, 2006 Report Share Posted February 13, 2006 Ladies - I think the post was intended for "Andree, " not . I had no problem with the men in our group. Best, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 Chris- I am sorry that you have been made to feel un-welcomed. I for one think it's great that you care enough about your girl friend to try to learn as much as you can to try and help her through this rough time in her life. Please don't get discouraged. Continue learning about breast cancer-continue supporting your loved one. - In breastcancer2 , Range wrote: > > dianaacree wrote: > > > There have been times I wanted to ask questions of a sexual nature, > > but didn't because of the men in the group. Do you know the names of > > any of the breast cancer survivor/patient groups you mentioned? > > Thank you in advance. > > I didn't want to address this, on the group(I have replied once but, > privately). Now I feel I have to. > > I didn't join this group to be condemned for, being a man. > > I joined this group for support, from the only people that could, in my > opinion, really understand because, their own spouses feeling the same > as me. > > Yes, I could talk to a bunch of men but, they would not understand my > life experiences as a woman would. > > I am not a 'troll'. > > I am not a sexual pervert. > > I am engaged to a woman who, while not having been 'officially' > diagnosed, yet, the possibility still looms on the horizon since, the > appointment is not till Wednesday. > > Additionally, Breast Cancer runs in her family. > > As I mentioned, at least once already, by members of this group telling > their situations/experiences, it helps remind me, that, she is not alone. > > I know that I am alone because, men just won't talk about. > > I guess I am a hinderance to you expressing, what you are going through. > > I guess, what a man goes through emotionally doesn't matter to you? > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 , I don't mind you being here but I do feel your comments were inappropriate. I just really need to know what's going on. Not feel like my situation is a "WOW"! Or guessing at my recovery. Alyssa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 , You are more than welcome here. The spouses and significant others play a very important part in our recovery.Your feelings are just as important as the patients. As I said in a previous post if anyone went to a face to face support group at their hospital there would be men and women unless it was specifically for breast cancer and then there could be men there also as men do get breast. Your fiance is very lucky to have you. A lot of men run out on their wives, finaces, significant others when they are diagnosed. There are groups for just women so if someone doesn't feel comfortable they can join that group also and ask their questions there that they feel uncomfortable asking here. Someday these groups may be faced with a man asking to join and wonder what will happen then?? Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com Re: It bothers me that dianaacree wrote:> There have been times I wanted to ask questions of a sexual nature, > but didn't because of the men in the group. Do you know the names of > any of the breast cancer survivor/patient groups you mentioned?> Thank you in advance. I didn't want to address this, on the group(I have replied once but, privately). Now I feel I have to. I didn't join this group to be condemned for, being a man.I joined this group for support, from the only people that could, in my opinion, really understand because, their own spouses feeling the same as me.Yes, I could talk to a bunch of men but, they would not understand my life experiences as a woman would.I am not a 'troll'.I am not a sexual pervert.I am engaged to a woman who, while not having been 'officially' diagnosed, yet, the possibility still looms on the horizon since, the appointment is not till Wednesday.Additionally, Breast Cancer runs in her family.As I mentioned, at least once already, by members of this group telling their situations/experiences, it helps remind me, that, she is not alone.I know that I am alone because, men just won't talk about.I guess I am a hinderance to you expressing, what you are going through.I guess, what a man goes through emotionally doesn't matter to you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 > > > > , > > I think a lot of times the husband etc. needs as much support as > the patient. Thats why I would never think of making this group for > women only. If it wasn't for my wonderful husband I don't know where > I would be today. > > There are groups out there just for breast cancer > patients/survivors but being isolated like that is not for me. But > everyone has their own thoughts and opinions which need to be > respected. > > Hugs > > nne > > Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html > > > > Check out my breast cancer ornaments at: > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html > > also check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at: > > http://www.cancerclub.com > > Re: It bothers me that > > > > > > well... > > it bothered my husband more than me when I was diagnosed- he > wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and not > me...he was so distraught! > > I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was not > surprised when it came to visit... > > He needed this group and I wish he had found it then... > > We are about survival. > > I don't think survival has a gender. > > Ask away, and > > I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your time of > need. > > Andree > > www.essentialsoapsinc.com > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 --- Hey , great minds think alike!!! hugs, Elaine In breastcancer2 , senalb wrote: > > , I am a member (and one of the moderators) of a " for women > only " breast cancer group. It's nice to have a place of our own > where we can talk about anything in privacy. No matter how much our > husbands, children or friends say they understand, they don't unless > they've had cancer themselves. Hugs, > http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/4BCSurvivors/ > > > > > > > > > > > > , > > > I think a lot of times the husband etc. needs as much support > as > > the patient. Thats why I would never think of making this group > for > > women only. If it wasn't for my wonderful husband I don't know > where > > I would be today. > > > There are groups out there just for breast cancer > > patients/survivors but being isolated like that is not for me. > But > > everyone has their own thoughts and opinions which need to be > > respected. > > > Hugs > > > nne > > > Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life > > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html > > > > > > Check out my breast cancer ornaments at: > > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html > > > also check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at: > > > http://www.cancerclub.com > > > Re: It bothers me that > > > > > > > > > well... > > > it bothered my husband more than me when I was diagnosed- > he > > wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and not > > me...he was so distraught! > > > I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was not > > surprised when it came to visit... > > > He needed this group and I wish he had found it then... > > > We are about survival. > > > I don't think survival has a gender. > > > Ask away, and > > > I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your time > of > > need. > > > Andree > > > www.essentialsoapsinc.com > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 Elaine, a big congratulations on your 9 year anniversary! Hugs, > > > > > > , > > > I think a lot of times the husband etc. needs as much support > as > > the patient. Thats why I would never think of making this group > for > > women only. If it wasn't for my wonderful husband I don't know > where > > I would be today. > > > There are groups out there just for breast cancer > > patients/survivors but being isolated like that is not for me. > But > > everyone has their own thoughts and opinions which need to be > > respected. > > > Hugs > > > nne > > > Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life > > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html > > > > > > Check out my breast cancer ornaments at: > > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html > > > also check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at: > > > http://www.cancerclub.com > > > Re: It bothers me that > > > > > > > > > well... > > > it bothered my husband more than me when I was diagnosed- he > > wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and not > > me...he was so distraught! > > > I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was not > > surprised when it came to visit... > > > He needed this group and I wish he had found it then... > > > We are about survival. > > > I don't think survival has a gender. > > > Ask away, and > > > I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your time > of > > need. > > > Andree > > > www.essentialsoapsinc.com > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 Actually, Elaine, I posted over 10 hours ago, but I've been on moderation for months now. I've been a member here for all but 2 months of my 6 1/2 years as a survivor. I think it's great that there is a place for men, families, and friends, but sometimes you just want to talk to people who truly understand. In breastcancer2 , " Elaine " wrote: > > --- Hey , great minds think alike!!! > hugs, Elaine > > > > In breastcancer2 , senalb <no_reply@> wrote: > > > > , I am a member (and one of the moderators) of a " for women > > only " breast cancer group. It's nice to have a place of our own > > where we can talk about anything in privacy. No matter how much our > > husbands, children or friends say they understand, they don't > unless > > they've had cancer themselves. Hugs, > > http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/4BCSurvivors/ > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > , > > > > I think a lot of times the husband etc. needs as much support > > as > > > the patient. Thats why I would never think of making this group > > for > > > women only. If it wasn't for my wonderful husband I don't know > > where > > > I would be today. > > > > There are groups out there just for breast cancer > > > patients/survivors but being isolated like that is not for me. > > But > > > everyone has their own thoughts and opinions which need to be > > > respected. > > > > Hugs > > > > nne > > > > Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life > > > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html > > > > > > > > Check out my breast cancer ornaments at: > > > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html > > > > also check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at: > > > > http://www.cancerclub.com > > > > Re: It bothers me that > > > > > > > > > > > > well... > > > > it bothered my husband more than me when I was diagnosed- > > he > > > wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and not > > > me...he was so distraught! > > > > I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was not > > > surprised when it came to visit... > > > > He needed this group and I wish he had found it then... > > > > We are about survival. > > > > I don't think survival has a gender. > > > > Ask away, and > > > > I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your time > > of > > > need. > > > > Andree > > > > www.essentialsoapsinc.com > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 I am going to see if my husband will reply to this later today. A lot of men pick up and run when their fiance, wife, girlfriend is diagnosed. I think its wonderful that and any other man is willing to learn more. Chuck went with me to every exam, chemo, etc. We have always gone to any dr doctor together and gone in with each other in the examination room. Maybe they don't understand what we are going through but they have their own " pain " that they are going through and need support, be able to ask questions, learn how to comfort their wife etc. What will you do if a man with breast cancer asks to join your group? nne > > > > > > , > > > I think a lot of times the husband etc. needs as much support > as > > the patient. Thats why I would never think of making this group > for > > women only. If it wasn't for my wonderful husband I don't know > where > > I would be today. > > > There are groups out there just for breast cancer > > patients/survivors but being isolated like that is not for me. > But > > everyone has their own thoughts and opinions which need to be > > respected. > > > Hugs > > > nne > > > Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life > > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html > > > > > > Check out my breast cancer ornaments at: > > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html > > > also check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at: > > > http://www.cancerclub.com > > > Re: It bothers me that > > > > > > > > > well... > > > it bothered my husband more than me when I was diagnosed- > he > > wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and not > > me...he was so distraught! > > > I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was not > > surprised when it came to visit... > > > He needed this group and I wish he had found it then... > > > We are about survival. > > > I don't think survival has a gender. > > > Ask away, and > > > I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your time > of > > need. > > > Andree > > > www.essentialsoapsinc.com > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 We'll direct him to this group, of course! > > > > > > > > , > > > > I think a lot of times the husband etc. needs as much support > > as > > > the patient. Thats why I would never think of making this group > > for > > > women only. If it wasn't for my wonderful husband I don't know > > where > > > I would be today. > > > > There are groups out there just for breast cancer > > > patients/survivors but being isolated like that is not for me. > > But > > > everyone has their own thoughts and opinions which need to be > > > respected. > > > > Hugs > > > > nne > > > > Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life > > > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html > > > > > > > > Check out my breast cancer ornaments at: > > > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html > > > > also check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at: > > > > http://www.cancerclub.com > > > > Re: It bothers me that > > > > > > > > > > > > well... > > > > it bothered my husband more than me when I was diagnosed- > > he > > > wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and not > > > me...he was so distraught! > > > > I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was not > > > surprised when it came to visit... > > > > He needed this group and I wish he had found it then... > > > > We are about survival. > > > > I don't think survival has a gender. > > > > Ask away, and > > > > I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your time > > of > > > need. > > > > Andree > > > > www.essentialsoapsinc.com > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 You know why you are on moderate. If you want to discuss this further you know my email address. nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com Re: It bothers me that> > > > > > > > > > > > well...> > > > it bothered my husband more than me when I was diagnosed- > > he > > > wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and not > > > me...he was so distraught!> > > > I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was not > > > surprised when it came to visit...> > > > He needed this group and I wish he had found it then...> > > > We are about survival.> > > > I don't think survival has a gender.> > > > Ask away, and > > > > I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your time > > of > > > need.> > > > Andree> > > > www.essentialsoapsinc.com > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 What about your "personal" questions that you ladies discuss? You wouldn't feel funny? Timmy knows of a trucker from Kansas I think he said it was.He was diagnosed a little over 12 yrs ago. He met him last week and was telling him about my journey with breast cancer and this group. I will tell Timmy to give him your url as well. nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com Re: It bothers me that> > > > > > > > > > > > well...> > > > it bothered my husband more than me when I was diagnosed- > > he > > > wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and not > > > me...he was so distraught!> > > > I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was not > > > surprised when it came to visit...> > > > He needed this group and I wish he had found it then...> > > > We are about survival.> > > > I don't think survival has a gender.> > > > Ask away, and > > > > I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your time > > of > > > need.> > > > Andree> > > > www.essentialsoapsinc.com > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 You misunderstood my answer. Timmy's trucker friend would be denied membership in 4BCSurvivors, and we would refer him to your group. > > > > > > > > > > , > > > > > I think a lot of times the husband etc. needs as much > support > > > as > > > > the patient. Thats why I would never think of making this > group > > > for > > > > women only. If it wasn't for my wonderful husband I don't > know > > > where > > > > I would be today. > > > > > There are groups out there just for breast cancer > > > > patients/survivors but being isolated like that is not for > me. > > > But > > > > everyone has their own thoughts and opinions which need to > be > > > > respected. > > > > > Hugs > > > > > nne > > > > > Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life > > > > > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html > > > > > > > > > > Check out my breast cancer ornaments at: > > > > > http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html > > > > > also check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts > at: > > > > > http://www.cancerclub.com > > > > > Re: It bothers me that > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > well... > > > > > it bothered my husband more than me when I was > diagnosed- > > > he > > > > wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and > not > > > > me...he was so distraught! > > > > > I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was > not > > > > surprised when it came to visit... > > > > > He needed this group and I wish he had found it then... > > > > > We are about survival. > > > > > I don't think survival has a gender. > > > > > Ask away, and > > > > > I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your > time > > > of > > > > need. > > > > > Andree > > > > > www.essentialsoapsinc.com > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 As one of my doctors said it is not just you that has the cancer......your FAMILY has cancer. It may be in my body but it effects everyone. , your girlfriend is very lucky to have someone who cares so much. Hugs, Jackie LaVoy My Quiet Hero www.myquiethero.com The Order Of The Silver Rose Ohio Director www.silverrose.org We sleep safe in our beds because rough men stand ready in the nightto visit violence on those who would do us harm. ~Orwell~ -- Re: It bothers me that , You are more than welcome here. The spouses and significant others play a very important part in our recovery.Your feelings are just as important as the patients. As I said in a previous post if anyone went to a face to face support group at their hospital there would be men and women unless it was specifically for breast cancer and then there could be men there also as men do get breast. Your fiance is very lucky to have you. A lot of men run out on their wives, finaces, significant others when they are diagnosed. There are groups for just women so if someone doesn't feel comfortable they can join that group also and ask their questions there that they feel uncomfortable asking here. Someday these groups may be faced with a man asking to join and wonder what will happen then?? Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com Re: It bothers me that dianaacree wrote:> There have been times I wanted to ask questions of a sexual nature, > but didn't because of the men in the group. Do you know the names of > any of the breast cancer survivor/patient groups you mentioned?> Thank you in advance. I didn't want to address this, on the group(I have replied once but, privately). Now I feel I have to. I didn't join this group to be condemned for, being a man.I joined this group for support, from the only people that could, in my opinion, really understand because, their own spouses feeling the same as me.Yes, I could talk to a bunch of men but, they would not understand my life experiences as a woman would.I am not a 'troll'.I am not a sexual pervert.I am engaged to a woman who, while not having been 'officially' diagnosed, yet, the possibility still looms on the horizon since, the appointment is not till Wednesday.Additionally, Breast Cancer runs in her family.As I mentioned, at least once already, by members of this group telling their situations/experiences, it helps remind me, that, she is not alone.I know that I am alone because, men just won't talk about.I guess I am a hinderance to you expressing, what you are going through.I guess, what a man goes through emotionally doesn't matter to you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 I totally agree Jackie. My doctors feel the same way. Its not right to isolate yourself from family and friends. This is when you need them the most. I think its wonderful that we have husbands etc, sons/daughters, friends and co-workers in this group. I welcome them with open arms. Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com Re: It bothers me that dianaacree wrote:> There have been times I wanted to ask questions of a sexual nature, > but didn't because of the men in the group. Do you know the names of > any of the breast cancer survivor/patient groups you mentioned?> Thank you in advance. I didn't want to address this, on the group(I have replied once but, privately). Now I feel I have to. I didn't join this group to be condemned for, being a man.I joined this group for support, from the only people that could, in my opinion, really understand because, their own spouses feeling the same as me.Yes, I could talk to a bunch of men but, they would not understand my life experiences as a woman would.I am not a 'troll'.I am not a sexual pervert.I am engaged to a woman who, while not having been 'officially' diagnosed, yet, the possibility still looms on the horizon since, the appointment is not till Wednesday.Additionally, Breast Cancer runs in her family.As I mentioned, at least once already, by members of this group telling their situations/experiences, it helps remind me, that, she is not alone.I know that I am alone because, men just won't talk about.I guess I am a hinderance to you expressing, what you are going through.I guess, what a man goes through emotionally doesn't matter to you? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2006 Report Share Posted February 14, 2006 Well you ladies do what you want but I would NEVER turn anyone away with breast cancer. If you haven't already put any type of info on your homepage I would put that in there so any man with bc wanting to join would know right off the bat he is not welcome. Sad. Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com Re: It bothers me that> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > well...> > > > > it bothered my husband more than me when I was > diagnosed- > > > he > > > > wanted more than anything for the cancer to be in him and > not > > > > me...he was so distraught!> > > > > I was so used to cancer with my family history...I was > not > > > > surprised when it came to visit...> > > > > He needed this group and I wish he had found it then...> > > > > We are about survival.> > > > > I don't think survival has a gender.> > > > > Ask away, and > > > > > I hope you get an answer that will comfort you in your > time > > > of > > > > need.> > > > > Andree> > > > > www.essentialsoapsinc.com > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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