Re: post-op anger/depression

[Guest guest]

BTW My husband didn't even know he had cancer the first day in the hospital

and he was a little sensitive. After he found out he was angry/depressed too

but gee how would YOU react if they found cancer in YOU?

He is probably very scared. My advice is to find a good nurse and ask her/him

to give him a pep talk. There is no reason to believe that he can't improve

and even be cured now since they found the cancer early and apparently there

was no spread. He may be down but he's not out of the game. Tell him we are all

routing for him!

God Bless

" As long as I know the WHO

I can bear any HOW

even though I don't know WHY "

(Commentary on Job from Dialogue in Despair)

[Guest guest]

Yes, tell him to count his blessings.

Have a quick read through some of the posts in this group, and tell

him about the many people that are much less fortunate than him, that

have end-stage disease and would love to trade places with him.

>

> Help. Advice needed please.

> My partner had surgery 4 days ago for the removal of a cancerous

polyp

> plus a chunk of bowel.

> The Op went fine, he hasn't got a colostomy and physically he's

> recovering well. However he's extremely 'sensitive' and irritable.

> Any advice on how I can help him through this before he alienates

> everyone in the hospital?

> Norma

[Guest guest]

let us not forget that anger is part of the process we must go thru in accepting

the ugly diagnosis of cancer. we go thru the grieving process (grieving our

bodies and the health we believed we had). it is just like grieving when

someone dies...the same process and the same steps. your partner deserves to

have his anger and to work thru it. it will help him emotionally deal with

thisa monster. i also belive anasthetic contributes to anger and depression. i

have seen many lose it a few days after surgery (and not just cancer surgery).

some kind of biochemical response. validate his anger, help him be aware of how

it is affecting others, but do not deny him his anger. there are many times in

our lives that anger is very justifiable, and this is one of them. do some

research on the grief cycle to find out more about this.

0 Tobi Hale, MSW & Sapphie, SD

l_

(/)_. It ain't my revolution if it ain't accessible!

Oh well, I wasn't using my civil rights anyway!

Re: Re: post-op anger/depression

Yes, he's lucky, but surgery stinks. I don't know all the reasons for the

depression or anger perhaps he is scared of the possibility of something

worse,

but if his mood doesn't improve call his Dr.

And as for all of us having it worse well yeah that's true but that's no

reason for us to be insensitive to how someone else might feel.

Feelings are not right or wrong they just ARE.

I hope that in time the depression lifts and things are back to normal

Take Care and God Bless

Narice

[Guest guest]

Is he on chemo? It can be a contributing factor to the depression at least.

As for the general anger and irritability it will take a while to adjust to

everything...and the hospital is just a ripe ground for feeling helpless and

alone. Maybe he's dealing with issues about how his partner is handling things

and yet he's not expressing things.....there's so much that could be going

through his head right now...add to that the pain and discomfort and it can be a

problem. Just keep the lines of communication open as much as possible. Try

not to let him shove you away if you can. Be patient.

Sheila