feeling down & dirty

[Guest guest]

First off, I have a bandaid on my finger & keep hitting the wrong key, but I don't want to go back & fix it, so bear with me. (Speakiung of bears, where's ie?) Well, I blew it big time with Sam. Tuesday I founed oujt she had skipped several classes alr3eady. When I confronted her, of course she lied about it, until I told her that the school was sending me a copoy of her attendance record, then she fessed up. But she didn't seem at all contrite, was rather snotty about it actually. The conversation escalated to the point that I knew I should back off, but I didn't. So she got really smart-alecky and I poppe3d her, hit her cheek with the back of my hand. It didn't hurt her, physically, but the look in her eyes is still haunting me. I wanted to be at least one person in her life who didn't hurt her. Maybe it was good, made me realize that I have feet of clay, or whatever the saying is, and can only take so much before I lose it. But I styill feel like shit. We had planned to go to Indidnapolis to a support group for sexual assault victimss that night. has one, but only for 18 years old and up; the Indy group will take younger teens. jSam still wanted to go, so we did. No conversation on the way there, but we talked sojme on the way home. I didn't stay at the group per her request, but she said it was really helpful & wants to go back. They meet twice a month. The group has just recently gotten started, and maybe after they get the kinks worked out, they will take younger girls. Althoujgh one advantage of the Indy group is that Sam dosn't know anyone there. j isn't a huge town, so privacy is sometimes a problem. Anyway, she's grounded for 2 weeks; no phone, tv, computer, friends, etc. I'm letting her go to boxingl, because I think that is's good for her. She takes boxing lessons 2 evenings a week. So school, boxing, church & family is all her social life for 2 weeks, then we'll see how she's doing at school. Well, thanks for letting me vent. Love, Rosie the kRough Rider