A Good Laugh

[Guest guest]

Hi Group,

These stories had me LOL and really cheered up my day. Hope they do the same

for you.

Sheila Wight, Oregon RA 2 years, AP 2 months

WHY AMERICANS SHOULD NEVER BE ALLOWED TO TRAVEL

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The following are actual stories provided by travel agents:

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" I had someone ask for an aisle seat so that their hair wouldn't

get messed up by being near the window. "

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" A client called in inquiring about a package

to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked,

" Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to

Hawaii? "

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" I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown. I

started to explain the length of the flight and the passport

information when she interrupted me with " I'm not trying to make

you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts.

" Without trying to make her look like the stupid one, I calmly

explained,

" Capecod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa. " Her response ...

click. "

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A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked

what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando.

He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to

explain that is not possible since Orlando is in the middle of the

state. He replied, " Don't lie to me. I looked on the map and

Florida is a very thin state. "

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I got a call from a man who asked, " Is it possible to see England

from Canada? " I said, " No. " He said " But they

look so close on the map. "

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" Another man called and asked if he could rent

a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he

had a 1-hour lay-over in Dallas. When I asked him why he

wanted to rent a car, he said, " I heard Dallas was a big airport, and I

need a

car to drive between the gates to save time. "

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A nice lady just called. She needed to know how it was possible

that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20am and got into Chicago

at 8:33am. I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of

llinois, but she could not understand the concept of time zones.

Finally I told her the plane went very fast, and she bought that!

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A woman called and asked, " Do airlines put your physical description on

your bag so they know who's

luggage belongs to who? " I said, " No, why do you ask? " She replied,

" Well, when I

checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that

said FAT, and I'm overweight, is there any connection? " After

putting her on hold while I " looked into it " ( I was actually laughing)

I

came back and explained the city code for Fresno is FAT, and that the

airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.

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I just got off the phone with a man who asked, " How do I know

which plane to get on? " I asked him what exactly he meant, which

he replied, " I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these

darn planes have numbers on them.

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" A woman called and said, " I need to fly to Pepsi-cola on one of

those computer planes. " I asked if she meant

to fly to Pensacola on a commuter plane. She said, " Yeah,

whatever. "

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A business man called and had a question about

the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a

lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa.

" Oh no I don't, I've been to China many times and never had to have

one of those. " I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a

visa. When I told him this he said, " Look, I've been to China four

times and

every time they have accepted my American Express. "

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A woman called to make reservations, " I want to go from Chicago

to Hippopotamus, New York " The agent was at a loss for words.

Finally, the agent: " Are you sure that's the name of the town? "

" Yes, what flights do you have? " replied the customer. After some

searching, the agent came back with, " I'm sorry, ma'am,

I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a

Hippopotamus anywhere. " The customer retorted, " Oh don't be silly.

Everyone knows where it is. Check your map! " The agent scoured a map

of the state of New York and finally offered, " You don't mean

Buffalo, do you? " " That's it! I knew it was a big animal! "