Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 Sandie, I understand how things are. Life does this to each one of us in turn. I just hate it for you. I have been through it lately myself with my GROWN son. You may have seen the post I thought I was sending Sher privetly..(that didn't work, imagine my surprise when there it was on the board.) Oh well I don't care much because life is life. Hills and Valleys. But My favorite thing it I know "JOY comes in the morning". Keep hanging on keep doing whatever it takes to keep on. I don't know how I got the rep. of being the monitor of the long posts but I'm NOT. I don't care how long posts are. I hope the job you want is the one you get. Love and Prayers, Peggy ipf 6/04 Florida"Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up." Maybe I will feel better about this and maybe not. (sorry peggy and others this is long, only way to get it all out)But I need to letit go and not worry about it because in reality it wasnt that important to me. I went to a job interview yesterday, now I already have a full time job but this company got a hold of my resume and contacted me for a position that have open. I thought I was prepared according to their posting I had all the qualifications and my thinking was it was more of a documentation, getting the team organized, leading projects and that sort of thing. I always go into an interview with a list of questions for them and the attitude that I dont need that job it keeps me less nervous and really I am interviewing them probably more then they are mebecause I dont want to be in a situation like I am now. Well I didnt give the best answer on a couple questions the rest I felt very good about. There was also a written part and I tried to cover all the parts that I could think of but I dont do good under pressure like that.Well during the interview I kept saying to myself, oh I see how this is. Their group is very small only 3 developers, 1 dba, and its a web group, they are growing but they really dont have standards, or project plans, or use really any software methodology. They dont have cross training, they dont offer 24/7 support for their shop they dont really have a good relationship or open communication or formal way of doing things,they do have a development, test and production environment but really no rules in place. Which you all probably dont understand that but its a big thing and it makes for a very disorganized, dysfunctional, and completly hectic area. But sometimes it can befor the better if people are open to change.I dont have to have another job, I dont have to go anywhere and I haveanother interview in a few weeks for another position at another entity actually it was the place I worked at before and I wouldonly go back there because my computer forensic degree would fitperfect and there would be a place I could move up too.So why does it bother me so? I dont know but I do need to let it go.the other thing my bipolar daughter calls up last night crying and carrying on that she is going to kill herself and all this because she cant live that way anymore, yada yada, My mom took that overand went and got her and then drug her down to the clinic this morning for some medication. I am not happy about her being hereand have told her this is her very very last chance, from here she will go to a shelter because she has about a week to get all her phone calls made and her life on track so she can take care of herself and her baby.I need to take my dog to the vet I have 2 dogs I have taken to the vetthis week, seems everything is falling apart around me. and its tough to breathe!Sandie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 Thanks Bruce and I am grateful for your kind words. I just have nothing left to give her. I have given and given and given and I just have nothing left anymore. that is sad to say because she is my daughter but there comes a point that you reach and you just cant get past it. Alls i can say is this. I have my mother living with me she has her own apt in the lower half of my house, it has a kitchen, bedroom, living room, bathroom everything. If she wasnt here my daughter wouldnt be here she would be at a shelter right now because I honestly cant take care of her and everyone else. Sandie > > > > Maybe I will feel better about this and maybe not. > > > > (sorry peggy and others this is long, only way to get it all out) > > > > But I need to let > > it go and not worry about it because in reality it wasnt that > important > > to me. I went to a job interview yesterday, now I already have a > full > > time job but this company got a hold of my resume and contacted me > for > > a position that have open. I thought I was prepared according to > their > > posting I had all the qualifications and my thinking was it was > more of > > a documentation, getting the team organized, leading projects and > that > > sort of thing. I always go into an interview with a list of > questions > > for them and the attitude that I dont need that job it keeps me > less > > nervous and really I am interviewing them probably more then they > are me > > because I dont want to be in a situation like I am now. Well I > didnt > > give the best answer on a couple questions the rest I felt very > good > > about. There was also a written part and I tried to cover all the > parts > > that I could think of but I dont do good under pressure like that. > > > > Well during the interview I kept saying to myself, oh I see how > this > > is. Their group is very small only 3 developers, 1 dba, and its a > web > > group, they are growing but they really dont have standards, or > project > > plans, or use really any software methodology. They dont have > cross > > training, they dont offer 24/7 support for their shop they dont > really > > have a good relationship or open communication or formal way of > doing > > things,they do have a development, test and production environment > but > > really no rules in place. Which you all probably dont understand > that > > but its a big thing and it makes for a very disorganized, > > dysfunctional, and completly hectic area. But sometimes it can be > > for the better if people are open to change. > > > > I dont have to have another job, I dont have to go anywhere and I > have > > another interview in a few weeks for another position at another > > entity actually it was the place I worked at before and I would > > only go back there because my computer forensic degree would fit > > perfect and there would be a place I could move up too. > > > > So why does it bother me so? I dont know but I do need to let it > go. > > > > the other thing my bipolar daughter calls up last night crying and > > carrying on that she is going to kill herself and all this because > > she cant live that way anymore, yada yada, My mom took that over > > and went and got her and then drug her down to the clinic this > > morning for some medication. I am not happy about her being here > > and have told her this is her very very last chance, from here > > she will go to a shelter because she has about a week to get all > her > > phone calls made and her life on track so she can take care of > > herself and her baby. > > > > I need to take my dog to the vet I have 2 dogs I have taken to the > vet > > this week, seems everything is falling apart around me. and its > tough > > to breathe! > > > > Sandie > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 Thanks Bruce and I am grateful for your kind words. I just have nothing left to give her. I have given and given and given and I just have nothing left anymore. that is sad to say because she is my daughter but there comes a point that you reach and you just cant get past it. Alls i can say is this. I have my mother living with me she has her own apt in the lower half of my house, it has a kitchen, bedroom, living room, bathroom everything. If she wasnt here my daughter wouldnt be here she would be at a shelter right now because I honestly cant take care of her and everyone else. Sandie > > > > Maybe I will feel better about this and maybe not. > > > > (sorry peggy and others this is long, only way to get it all out) > > > > But I need to let > > it go and not worry about it because in reality it wasnt that > important > > to me. I went to a job interview yesterday, now I already have a > full > > time job but this company got a hold of my resume and contacted me > for > > a position that have open. I thought I was prepared according to > their > > posting I had all the qualifications and my thinking was it was > more of > > a documentation, getting the team organized, leading projects and > that > > sort of thing. I always go into an interview with a list of > questions > > for them and the attitude that I dont need that job it keeps me > less > > nervous and really I am interviewing them probably more then they > are me > > because I dont want to be in a situation like I am now. Well I > didnt > > give the best answer on a couple questions the rest I felt very > good > > about. There was also a written part and I tried to cover all the > parts > > that I could think of but I dont do good under pressure like that. > > > > Well during the interview I kept saying to myself, oh I see how > this > > is. Their group is very small only 3 developers, 1 dba, and its a > web > > group, they are growing but they really dont have standards, or > project > > plans, or use really any software methodology. They dont have > cross > > training, they dont offer 24/7 support for their shop they dont > really > > have a good relationship or open communication or formal way of > doing > > things,they do have a development, test and production environment > but > > really no rules in place. Which you all probably dont understand > that > > but its a big thing and it makes for a very disorganized, > > dysfunctional, and completly hectic area. But sometimes it can be > > for the better if people are open to change. > > > > I dont have to have another job, I dont have to go anywhere and I > have > > another interview in a few weeks for another position at another > > entity actually it was the place I worked at before and I would > > only go back there because my computer forensic degree would fit > > perfect and there would be a place I could move up too. > > > > So why does it bother me so? I dont know but I do need to let it > go. > > > > the other thing my bipolar daughter calls up last night crying and > > carrying on that she is going to kill herself and all this because > > she cant live that way anymore, yada yada, My mom took that over > > and went and got her and then drug her down to the clinic this > > morning for some medication. I am not happy about her being here > > and have told her this is her very very last chance, from here > > she will go to a shelter because she has about a week to get all > her > > phone calls made and her life on track so she can take care of > > herself and her baby. > > > > I need to take my dog to the vet I have 2 dogs I have taken to the > vet > > this week, seems everything is falling apart around me. and its > tough > > to breathe! > > > > Sandie > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 Thanks Peggy I just dont get why no one sees that I am struggling why my own family cant see I dont feel good, it is a shame. Sandie > > Maybe I will feel better about this and maybe not. > > (sorry peggy and others this is long, only way to get it all out) > > But I need to let > it go and not worry about it because in reality it wasnt that important > to me. I went to a job interview yesterday, now I already have a full > time job but this company got a hold of my resume and contacted me for > a position that have open. I thought I was prepared according to their > posting I had all the qualifications and my thinking was it was more of > a documentation, getting the team organized, leading projects and that > sort of thing. I always go into an interview with a list of questions > for them and the attitude that I dont need that job it keeps me less > nervous and really I am interviewing them probably more then they are me > because I dont want to be in a situation like I am now. Well I didnt > give the best answer on a couple questions the rest I felt very good > about. There was also a written part and I tried to cover all the parts > that I could think of but I dont do good under pressure like that. > > Well during the interview I kept saying to myself, oh I see how this > is. Their group is very small only 3 developers, 1 dba, and its a web > group, they are growing but they really dont have standards, or project > plans, or use really any software methodology. They dont have cross > training, they dont offer 24/7 support for their shop they dont really > have a good relationship or open communication or formal way of doing > things,they do have a development, test and production environment but > really no rules in place. Which you all probably dont understand that > but its a big thing and it makes for a very disorganized, > dysfunctional, and completly hectic area. But sometimes it can be > for the better if people are open to change. > > I dont have to have another job, I dont have to go anywhere and I have > another interview in a few weeks for another position at another > entity actually it was the place I worked at before and I would > only go back there because my computer forensic degree would fit > perfect and there would be a place I could move up too. > > So why does it bother me so? I dont know but I do need to let it go. > > the other thing my bipolar daughter calls up last night crying and > carrying on that she is going to kill herself and all this because > she cant live that way anymore, yada yada, My mom took that over > and went and got her and then drug her down to the clinic this > morning for some medication. I am not happy about her being here > and have told her this is her very very last chance, from here > she will go to a shelter because she has about a week to get all her > phone calls made and her life on track so she can take care of > herself and her baby. > > I need to take my dog to the vet I have 2 dogs I have taken to the vet > this week, seems everything is falling apart around me. and its tough > to breathe! > > Sandie > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 Sandi...it's hard to 'generalize' when offering 'advice'. Sounds like you need to make some decisions, maybe prioritize those decisions and also decide what is 'your stuff' and what is 'someone else's stuff. You don't say the age of your daughter and perhaps it doesn't matter (a generalization). You need to take care of yourself. Even if it feels selfish you need to take care of yourself. I'm not insensitive about daughters in trouble...I had a daughter into drugs for 18 years and the life style that goes with it. If your daughter doesn't take her meds these are the consequences, surely she knows that. Our primary interest here is our disease and how to care for ourselves in the best way we know. Even if your family 'doesn't get it' you do. I think I remember that you have older kids...let one of them take the dogs to the vet. Call ahead for instructions to the vet and delegate the job out. Sandi, it sounds like you are letting yourself get overwhelmed by things you can change and you're feeling worse. Sure it's tough to breathe. Anxiety really plays a number on us, huh. Be as good to you as you are to others! Sher; ipf 3-06; OR.Don't fret about tomorrow, God is already there! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 Sandi...it's hard to 'generalize' when offering 'advice'. Sounds like you need to make some decisions, maybe prioritize those decisions and also decide what is 'your stuff' and what is 'someone else's stuff. You don't say the age of your daughter and perhaps it doesn't matter (a generalization). You need to take care of yourself. Even if it feels selfish you need to take care of yourself. I'm not insensitive about daughters in trouble...I had a daughter into drugs for 18 years and the life style that goes with it. If your daughter doesn't take her meds these are the consequences, surely she knows that. Our primary interest here is our disease and how to care for ourselves in the best way we know. Even if your family 'doesn't get it' you do. I think I remember that you have older kids...let one of them take the dogs to the vet. Call ahead for instructions to the vet and delegate the job out. Sandi, it sounds like you are letting yourself get overwhelmed by things you can change and you're feeling worse. Sure it's tough to breathe. Anxiety really plays a number on us, huh. Be as good to you as you are to others! Sher; ipf 3-06; OR.Don't fret about tomorrow, God is already there! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 Isnt that the truth Sher. My daughter is 21 almost 22. And if i could delegate it I would. Both boys at work, husband well he went with to the vet. daughter well you already know about her. But if I dont do the things they dont get done and all the hollering, yelling, asking, complaining or anything wont change that. said but true Sandie > > Sandi...it's hard to 'generalize' when offering 'advice'. > Sounds like you need to make some decisions, maybe prioritize those decisions and also decide what is 'your stuff' and what is 'someone else's stuff. > > You don't say the age of your daughter and perhaps it doesn't matter (a generalization). You need to take care of yourself. Even if it feels selfish you need to take care of yourself. > I'm not insensitive about daughters in trouble...I had a daughter into drugs for 18 years and the life style that goes with it. If your daughter doesn't take her meds these are the consequences, surely she knows that. > > Our primary interest here is our disease and how to care for ourselves in the best way we know. Even if your family 'doesn't get it' you do. > > I think I remember that you have older kids...let one of them take the dogs to the vet. Call ahead for instructions to the vet > and delegate the job out. > > Sandi, it sounds like you are letting yourself get overwhelmed by things you can change and you're feeling worse. > > Sure it's tough to breathe. Anxiety really plays a number on us, huh. > > Be as good to you as you are to others! > > Sher; ipf 3-06; OR. > Don't fret about tomorrow, God is already there! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 Isnt that the truth Sher. My daughter is 21 almost 22. And if i could delegate it I would. Both boys at work, husband well he went with to the vet. daughter well you already know about her. But if I dont do the things they dont get done and all the hollering, yelling, asking, complaining or anything wont change that. said but true Sandie > > Sandi...it's hard to 'generalize' when offering 'advice'. > Sounds like you need to make some decisions, maybe prioritize those decisions and also decide what is 'your stuff' and what is 'someone else's stuff. > > You don't say the age of your daughter and perhaps it doesn't matter (a generalization). You need to take care of yourself. Even if it feels selfish you need to take care of yourself. > I'm not insensitive about daughters in trouble...I had a daughter into drugs for 18 years and the life style that goes with it. If your daughter doesn't take her meds these are the consequences, surely she knows that. > > Our primary interest here is our disease and how to care for ourselves in the best way we know. Even if your family 'doesn't get it' you do. > > I think I remember that you have older kids...let one of them take the dogs to the vet. Call ahead for instructions to the vet > and delegate the job out. > > Sandi, it sounds like you are letting yourself get overwhelmed by things you can change and you're feeling worse. > > Sure it's tough to breathe. Anxiety really plays a number on us, huh. > > Be as good to you as you are to others! > > Sher; ipf 3-06; OR. > Don't fret about tomorrow, God is already there! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 (((Sandie))) You wouldn't be human if things didn't get you down from time to time xxxx Much love and strength to you Love Ze xx > > > > Maybe I will feel better about this and maybe not.> > > > (sorry peggy and others this is long, only way to get it all out)> > > > But I need to let> > it go and not worry about it because in reality it wasnt that > important> > to me. I went to a job interview yesterday, now I already have a > full> > time job but this company got a hold of my resume and contacted me > for> > a position that have open. I thought I was prepared according to > their> > posting I had all the qualifications and my thinking was it was > more of> > a documentation, getting the team organized, leading projects and > that> > sort of thing. I always go into an interview with a list of > questions> > for them and the attitude that I dont need that job it keeps me less> > nervous and really I am interviewing them probably more then they > are me> > because I dont want to be in a situation like I am now. Well I didnt> > give the best answer on a couple questions the rest I felt very good> > about. There was also a written part and I tried to cover all the > parts> > that I could think of but I dont do good under pressure like that.> > > > Well during the interview I kept saying to myself, oh I see how this> > is. Their group is very small only 3 developers, 1 dba, and its a > web> > group, they are growing but they really dont have standards, or > project> > plans, or use really any software methodology. They dont have cross> > training, they dont offer 24/7 support for their shop they dont > really> > have a good relationship or open communication or formal way of > doing> > things,they do have a development, test and production environment > but> > really no rules in place. Which you all probably dont understand > that> > but its a big thing and it makes for a very disorganized,> > dysfunctional, and completly hectic area. But sometimes it can be> > for the better if people are open to change.> > > > I dont have to have another job, I dont have to go anywhere and I > have> > another interview in a few weeks for another position at another> > entity actually it was the place I worked at before and I would> > only go back there because my computer forensic degree would fit> > perfect and there would be a place I could move up too.> > > > So why does it bother me so? I dont know but I do need to let it go.> > > > the other thing my bipolar daughter calls up last night crying and> > carrying on that she is going to kill herself and all this because> > she cant live that way anymore, yada yada, My mom took that over> > and went and got her and then drug her down to the clinic this> > morning for some medication. I am not happy about her being here> > and have told her this is her very very last chance, from here> > she will go to a shelter because she has about a week to get all her> > phone calls made and her life on track so she can take care of> > herself and her baby.> > > > I need to take my dog to the vet I have 2 dogs I have taken to the > vet> > this week, seems everything is falling apart around me. and its > tough> > to breathe!> > > > Sandie> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 (((Sandie))) You wouldn't be human if things didn't get you down from time to time xxxx Much love and strength to you Love Ze xx > > > > Maybe I will feel better about this and maybe not.> > > > (sorry peggy and others this is long, only way to get it all out)> > > > But I need to let> > it go and not worry about it because in reality it wasnt that > important> > to me. I went to a job interview yesterday, now I already have a > full> > time job but this company got a hold of my resume and contacted me > for> > a position that have open. I thought I was prepared according to > their> > posting I had all the qualifications and my thinking was it was > more of> > a documentation, getting the team organized, leading projects and > that> > sort of thing. I always go into an interview with a list of > questions> > for them and the attitude that I dont need that job it keeps me less> > nervous and really I am interviewing them probably more then they > are me> > because I dont want to be in a situation like I am now. Well I didnt> > give the best answer on a couple questions the rest I felt very good> > about. There was also a written part and I tried to cover all the > parts> > that I could think of but I dont do good under pressure like that.> > > > Well during the interview I kept saying to myself, oh I see how this> > is. Their group is very small only 3 developers, 1 dba, and its a > web> > group, they are growing but they really dont have standards, or > project> > plans, or use really any software methodology. They dont have cross> > training, they dont offer 24/7 support for their shop they dont > really> > have a good relationship or open communication or formal way of > doing> > things,they do have a development, test and production environment > but> > really no rules in place. Which you all probably dont understand > that> > but its a big thing and it makes for a very disorganized,> > dysfunctional, and completly hectic area. But sometimes it can be> > for the better if people are open to change.> > > > I dont have to have another job, I dont have to go anywhere and I > have> > another interview in a few weeks for another position at another> > entity actually it was the place I worked at before and I would> > only go back there because my computer forensic degree would fit> > perfect and there would be a place I could move up too.> > > > So why does it bother me so? I dont know but I do need to let it go.> > > > the other thing my bipolar daughter calls up last night crying and> > carrying on that she is going to kill herself and all this because> > she cant live that way anymore, yada yada, My mom took that over> > and went and got her and then drug her down to the clinic this> > morning for some medication. I am not happy about her being here> > and have told her this is her very very last chance, from here> > she will go to a shelter because she has about a week to get all her> > phone calls made and her life on track so she can take care of> > herself and her baby.> > > > I need to take my dog to the vet I have 2 dogs I have taken to the > vet> > this week, seems everything is falling apart around me. and its > tough> > to breathe!> > > > Sandie> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 If they don't get done, then let them not get done. You do what you need. We all have to set boundaries, whether healthy or not. When they have no clean clothes, maybe they'll find the washer. If they get hungry enough, they'll figure out how to get food. You must take care of and protect yourself. Some will understand and some never will. > > > > Sandi...it's hard to 'generalize' when offering 'advice'. > > Sounds like you need to make some decisions, maybe prioritize those > decisions and also decide what is 'your stuff' and what is 'someone > else's stuff. > > > > You don't say the age of your daughter and perhaps it doesn't > matter (a generalization). You need to take care of yourself. Even if > it feels selfish you need to take care of yourself. > > I'm not insensitive about daughters in trouble...I had a daughter > into drugs for 18 years and the life style that goes with it. If your > daughter doesn't take her meds these are the consequences, surely she > knows that. > > > > Our primary interest here is our disease and how to care for > ourselves in the best way we know. Even if your family 'doesn't get > it' you do. > > > > I think I remember that you have older kids...let one of them take > the dogs to the vet. Call ahead for instructions to the vet > > and delegate the job out. > > > > Sandi, it sounds like you are letting yourself get overwhelmed by > things you can change and you're feeling worse. > > > > Sure it's tough to breathe. Anxiety really plays a number on us, > huh. > > > > Be as good to you as you are to others! > > > > Sher; ipf 3-06; OR. > > Don't fret about tomorrow, God is already there! > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 Hi Sandie, I am so sorry that you are so stressed out. I just wanted to let you know that I am praying for you during this time. I, too am so stressed out because my husband, Eddie, comes home from work and worries that our daughter, , is not preparing to move so he then starts venting his frustration. is moving two weeks from today and I just want peace! is also helping me with a special Christmas present for my brother & sister and has scanned in more then 100 pictures that I will put in an album. Eddie then starts in on how we are going to put the pictures in the notebook, we've got to go to the store for this and that, yada yada yada! I finally told him that he is not involved in this project. Now he is venting on polishing a piece of silver that was on the top shelf in the cabinet that we have never used! Sometimes I think that my dear husband is bipolar, but I am not sure. We have a niece who suffers from it and now she is doing great. Took a while, but she seems responsible and is working. Maybe it will take awhile for your daughter, too. Take care of yourself, Sandie! I started out today resting, but the day is not ending up that way ! (LOL) Toodles! Jane UIP/IPF 12/1998 Dalton, Georgia aka pianolady_musicgirl > > >> > > Maybe I will feel better about this and maybe not. > > > > > > (sorry peggy and others this is long, only way to get it all out)> > > > > > But I need to let> > > it go and not worry about it because in reality it wasnt that > > important > > > to me. I went to a job interview yesterday, now I already have a > > full > > > time job but this company got a hold of my resume and contacted > me > > for > > > a position that have open. I thought I was prepared according to > > their > > > posting I had all the qualifications and my thinking was it was > > more of > > > a documentation, getting the team organized, leading projects and > > that > > > sort of thing. I always go into an interview with a list of > > questions > > > for them and the attitude that I dont need that job it keeps me > > less > > > nervous and really I am interviewing them probably more then they > > are me> > > because I dont want to be in a situation like I am now. Well I > > didnt > > > give the best answer on a couple questions the rest I felt very > > good > > > about. There was also a written part and I tried to cover all the > > parts > > > that I could think of but I dont do good under pressure like that.> > > > > > Well during the interview I kept saying to myself, oh I see how > > this > > > is. Their group is very small only 3 developers, 1 dba, and its > a > > web > > > group, they are growing but they really dont have standards, or > > project > > > plans, or use really any software methodology. They dont have > > cross > > > training, they dont offer 24/7 support for their shop they dont > > really > > > have a good relationship or open communication or formal way of > > doing > > > things,they do have a development, test and production > environment > > but > > > really no rules in place. Which you all probably dont understand > > that > > > but its a big thing and it makes for a very disorganized, > > > dysfunctional, and completly hectic area. But sometimes it can be> > > for the better if people are open to change.> > > > > > I dont have to have another job, I dont have to go anywhere and I > > have> > > another interview in a few weeks for another position at another > > > entity actually it was the place I worked at before and I would> > > only go back there because my computer forensic degree would fit> > > perfect and there would be a place I could move up too.> > > > > > So why does it bother me so? I dont know but I do need to let it > > go.> > > > > > the other thing my bipolar daughter calls up last night crying > and > > > carrying on that she is going to kill herself and all this > because > > > she cant live that way anymore, yada yada, My mom took that over> > > and went and got her and then drug her down to the clinic this > > > morning for some medication. I am not happy about her being here> > > and have told her this is her very very last chance, from here > > > she will go to a shelter because she has about a week to get all > > her > > > phone calls made and her life on track so she can take care of > > > herself and her baby.> > > > > > I need to take my dog to the vet I have 2 dogs I have taken to > the > > vet> > > this week, seems everything is falling apart around me. and its > > tough > > > to breathe!> > > > > > Sandie> > >> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 Hi Sandie, I am so sorry that you are so stressed out. I just wanted to let you know that I am praying for you during this time. I, too am so stressed out because my husband, Eddie, comes home from work and worries that our daughter, , is not preparing to move so he then starts venting his frustration. is moving two weeks from today and I just want peace! is also helping me with a special Christmas present for my brother & sister and has scanned in more then 100 pictures that I will put in an album. Eddie then starts in on how we are going to put the pictures in the notebook, we've got to go to the store for this and that, yada yada yada! I finally told him that he is not involved in this project. Now he is venting on polishing a piece of silver that was on the top shelf in the cabinet that we have never used! Sometimes I think that my dear husband is bipolar, but I am not sure. We have a niece who suffers from it and now she is doing great. Took a while, but she seems responsible and is working. Maybe it will take awhile for your daughter, too. Take care of yourself, Sandie! I started out today resting, but the day is not ending up that way ! (LOL) Toodles! Jane UIP/IPF 12/1998 Dalton, Georgia aka pianolady_musicgirl > > >> > > Maybe I will feel better about this and maybe not. > > > > > > (sorry peggy and others this is long, only way to get it all out)> > > > > > But I need to let> > > it go and not worry about it because in reality it wasnt that > > important > > > to me. I went to a job interview yesterday, now I already have a > > full > > > time job but this company got a hold of my resume and contacted > me > > for > > > a position that have open. I thought I was prepared according to > > their > > > posting I had all the qualifications and my thinking was it was > > more of > > > a documentation, getting the team organized, leading projects and > > that > > > sort of thing. I always go into an interview with a list of > > questions > > > for them and the attitude that I dont need that job it keeps me > > less > > > nervous and really I am interviewing them probably more then they > > are me> > > because I dont want to be in a situation like I am now. Well I > > didnt > > > give the best answer on a couple questions the rest I felt very > > good > > > about. There was also a written part and I tried to cover all the > > parts > > > that I could think of but I dont do good under pressure like that.> > > > > > Well during the interview I kept saying to myself, oh I see how > > this > > > is. Their group is very small only 3 developers, 1 dba, and its > a > > web > > > group, they are growing but they really dont have standards, or > > project > > > plans, or use really any software methodology. They dont have > > cross > > > training, they dont offer 24/7 support for their shop they dont > > really > > > have a good relationship or open communication or formal way of > > doing > > > things,they do have a development, test and production > environment > > but > > > really no rules in place. Which you all probably dont understand > > that > > > but its a big thing and it makes for a very disorganized, > > > dysfunctional, and completly hectic area. But sometimes it can be> > > for the better if people are open to change.> > > > > > I dont have to have another job, I dont have to go anywhere and I > > have> > > another interview in a few weeks for another position at another > > > entity actually it was the place I worked at before and I would> > > only go back there because my computer forensic degree would fit> > > perfect and there would be a place I could move up too.> > > > > > So why does it bother me so? I dont know but I do need to let it > > go.> > > > > > the other thing my bipolar daughter calls up last night crying > and > > > carrying on that she is going to kill herself and all this > because > > > she cant live that way anymore, yada yada, My mom took that over> > > and went and got her and then drug her down to the clinic this > > > morning for some medication. I am not happy about her being here> > > and have told her this is her very very last chance, from here > > > she will go to a shelter because she has about a week to get all > > her > > > phone calls made and her life on track so she can take care of > > > herself and her baby.> > > > > > I need to take my dog to the vet I have 2 dogs I have taken to > the > > vet> > > this week, seems everything is falling apart around me. and its > > tough > > > to breathe!> > > > > > Sandie> > >> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 Jane: You need to slip something into his hot chocolate...lol Strange how we take out our emotions...piece of silver that never gets used. Well, now at least you know how to occupy him. If he starts to jump in on your and 's project again just dirty up the silver again. > > > > > > > > Maybe I will feel better about this and maybe not. > > > > > > > > (sorry peggy and others this is long, only way to get it all out) > > > > > > > > But I need to let > > > > it go and not worry about it because in reality it wasnt that > > > important > > > > to me. I went to a job interview yesterday, now I already have a > > > full > > > > time job but this company got a hold of my resume and contacted > > me > > > for > > > > a position that have open. I thought I was prepared according to > > > their > > > > posting I had all the qualifications and my thinking was it was > > > more of > > > > a documentation, getting the team organized, leading projects and > > > that > > > > sort of thing. I always go into an interview with a list of > > > questions > > > > for them and the attitude that I dont need that job it keeps me > > > less > > > > nervous and really I am interviewing them probably more then they > > > are me > > > > because I dont want to be in a situation like I am now. Well I > > > didnt > > > > give the best answer on a couple questions the rest I felt very > > > good > > > > about. There was also a written part and I tried to cover all the > > > parts > > > > that I could think of but I dont do good under pressure like that. > > > > > > > > Well during the interview I kept saying to myself, oh I see how > > > this > > > > is. Their group is very small only 3 developers, 1 dba, and its > > a > > > web > > > > group, they are growing but they really dont have standards, or > > > project > > > > plans, or use really any software methodology. They dont have > > > cross > > > > training, they dont offer 24/7 support for their shop they dont > > > really > > > > have a good relationship or open communication or formal way of > > > doing > > > > things,they do have a development, test and production > > environment > > > but > > > > really no rules in place. Which you all probably dont understand > > > that > > > > but its a big thing and it makes for a very disorganized, > > > > dysfunctional, and completly hectic area. But sometimes it can be > > > > for the better if people are open to change. > > > > > > > > I dont have to have another job, I dont have to go anywhere and I > > > have > > > > another interview in a few weeks for another position at another > > > > entity actually it was the place I worked at before and I would > > > > only go back there because my computer forensic degree would fit > > > > perfect and there would be a place I could move up too. > > > > > > > > So why does it bother me so? I dont know but I do need to let it > > > go. > > > > > > > > the other thing my bipolar daughter calls up last night crying > > and > > > > carrying on that she is going to kill herself and all this > > because > > > > she cant live that way anymore, yada yada, My mom took that over > > > > and went and got her and then drug her down to the clinic this > > > > morning for some medication. I am not happy about her being here > > > > and have told her this is her very very last chance, from here > > > > she will go to a shelter because she has about a week to get all > > > her > > > > phone calls made and her life on track so she can take care of > > > > herself and her baby. > > > > > > > > I need to take my dog to the vet I have 2 dogs I have taken to > > the > > > vet > > > > this week, seems everything is falling apart around me. and its > > > tough > > > > to breathe! > > > > > > > > Sandie > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 Jane: You need to slip something into his hot chocolate...lol Strange how we take out our emotions...piece of silver that never gets used. Well, now at least you know how to occupy him. If he starts to jump in on your and 's project again just dirty up the silver again. > > > > > > > > Maybe I will feel better about this and maybe not. > > > > > > > > (sorry peggy and others this is long, only way to get it all out) > > > > > > > > But I need to let > > > > it go and not worry about it because in reality it wasnt that > > > important > > > > to me. I went to a job interview yesterday, now I already have a > > > full > > > > time job but this company got a hold of my resume and contacted > > me > > > for > > > > a position that have open. I thought I was prepared according to > > > their > > > > posting I had all the qualifications and my thinking was it was > > > more of > > > > a documentation, getting the team organized, leading projects and > > > that > > > > sort of thing. I always go into an interview with a list of > > > questions > > > > for them and the attitude that I dont need that job it keeps me > > > less > > > > nervous and really I am interviewing them probably more then they > > > are me > > > > because I dont want to be in a situation like I am now. Well I > > > didnt > > > > give the best answer on a couple questions the rest I felt very > > > good > > > > about. There was also a written part and I tried to cover all the > > > parts > > > > that I could think of but I dont do good under pressure like that. > > > > > > > > Well during the interview I kept saying to myself, oh I see how > > > this > > > > is. Their group is very small only 3 developers, 1 dba, and its > > a > > > web > > > > group, they are growing but they really dont have standards, or > > > project > > > > plans, or use really any software methodology. They dont have > > > cross > > > > training, they dont offer 24/7 support for their shop they dont > > > really > > > > have a good relationship or open communication or formal way of > > > doing > > > > things,they do have a development, test and production > > environment > > > but > > > > really no rules in place. Which you all probably dont understand > > > that > > > > but its a big thing and it makes for a very disorganized, > > > > dysfunctional, and completly hectic area. But sometimes it can be > > > > for the better if people are open to change. > > > > > > > > I dont have to have another job, I dont have to go anywhere and I > > > have > > > > another interview in a few weeks for another position at another > > > > entity actually it was the place I worked at before and I would > > > > only go back there because my computer forensic degree would fit > > > > perfect and there would be a place I could move up too. > > > > > > > > So why does it bother me so? I dont know but I do need to let it > > > go. > > > > > > > > the other thing my bipolar daughter calls up last night crying > > and > > > > carrying on that she is going to kill herself and all this > > because > > > > she cant live that way anymore, yada yada, My mom took that over > > > > and went and got her and then drug her down to the clinic this > > > > morning for some medication. I am not happy about her being here > > > > and have told her this is her very very last chance, from here > > > > she will go to a shelter because she has about a week to get all > > > her > > > > phone calls made and her life on track so she can take care of > > > > herself and her baby. > > > > > > > > I need to take my dog to the vet I have 2 dogs I have taken to > > the > > > vet > > > > this week, seems everything is falling apart around me. and its > > > tough > > > > to breathe! > > > > > > > > Sandie > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 Oh Sandie, I wish with all my heart that all this stress wasn't happening for you..your daughter is the toughest one of all...how to help when you can't really help...gosh what an awful situation...we want the very best for our adult children & it tears our hearts out when things go pear-shaped. Worrying over the welfare of grandchildren is even tougher... All I can suggest is to make SOME space for you to enter a peaceful zone & not allow this in for at least a short time each day..BLOCK it out however you can...I've always used 'going to sleep' time to do this...stress might INVADE my day but I sure as heck won't allow it to invade my NIGHT....since childhood, going to sleep has always been a comforting part of my existence...soothing, calming & creative 'cos I just 'make-up' whatever reality I want. We can only think ONE thought at a time & if you don't LIKE the thought you're having then CHANGE it for another that you DO like!!!! The trick ois to catch yourself out allowing rotten thoughts in! lots of love, in Oz >> Maybe I will feel better about this and maybe not. > > (sorry peggy and others this is long, only way to get it all out)> > But I need to let> it go and not worry about it because in reality it wasnt that important > to me. I went to a job interview yesterday, now I already have a full > time job but this company got a hold of my resume and contacted me for > a position that have open. I thought I was prepared according to their > posting I had all the qualifications and my thinking was it was more of > a documentation, getting the team organized, leading projects and that > sort of thing. I always go into an interview with a list of questions > for them and the attitude that I dont need that job it keeps me less > nervous and really I am interviewing them probably more then they are me> because I dont want to be in a situation like I am now. Well I didnt > give the best answer on a couple questions the rest I felt very good > about. There was also a written part and I tried to cover all the parts > that I could think of but I dont do good under pressure like that.> > Well during the interview I kept saying to myself, oh I see how this > is. Their group is very small only 3 developers, 1 dba, and its a web > group, they are growing but they really dont have standards, or project > plans, or use really any software methodology. They dont have cross > training, they dont offer 24/7 support for their shop they dont really > have a good relationship or open communication or formal way of doing > things,they do have a development, test and production environment but > really no rules in place. Which you all probably dont understand that > but its a big thing and it makes for a very disorganized, > dysfunctional, and completly hectic area. But sometimes it can be> for the better if people are open to change.> > I dont have to have another job, I dont have to go anywhere and I have> another interview in a few weeks for another position at another > entity actually it was the place I worked at before and I would> only go back there because my computer forensic degree would fit> perfect and there would be a place I could move up too.> > So why does it bother me so? I dont know but I do need to let it go.> > the other thing my bipolar daughter calls up last night crying and > carrying on that she is going to kill herself and all this because > she cant live that way anymore, yada yada, My mom took that over> and went and got her and then drug her down to the clinic this > morning for some medication. I am not happy about her being here> and have told her this is her very very last chance, from here > she will go to a shelter because she has about a week to get all her > phone calls made and her life on track so she can take care of > herself and her baby.> > I need to take my dog to the vet I have 2 dogs I have taken to the vet> this week, seems everything is falling apart around me. and its tough > to breathe!> > Sandie> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2007 Report Share Posted December 15, 2007 Oh Sandie, I wish with all my heart that all this stress wasn't happening for you..your daughter is the toughest one of all...how to help when you can't really help...gosh what an awful situation...we want the very best for our adult children & it tears our hearts out when things go pear-shaped. Worrying over the welfare of grandchildren is even tougher... All I can suggest is to make SOME space for you to enter a peaceful zone & not allow this in for at least a short time each day..BLOCK it out however you can...I've always used 'going to sleep' time to do this...stress might INVADE my day but I sure as heck won't allow it to invade my NIGHT....since childhood, going to sleep has always been a comforting part of my existence...soothing, calming & creative 'cos I just 'make-up' whatever reality I want. We can only think ONE thought at a time & if you don't LIKE the thought you're having then CHANGE it for another that you DO like!!!! The trick ois to catch yourself out allowing rotten thoughts in! lots of love, in Oz >> Maybe I will feel better about this and maybe not. > > (sorry peggy and others this is long, only way to get it all out)> > But I need to let> it go and not worry about it because in reality it wasnt that important > to me. I went to a job interview yesterday, now I already have a full > time job but this company got a hold of my resume and contacted me for > a position that have open. I thought I was prepared according to their > posting I had all the qualifications and my thinking was it was more of > a documentation, getting the team organized, leading projects and that > sort of thing. I always go into an interview with a list of questions > for them and the attitude that I dont need that job it keeps me less > nervous and really I am interviewing them probably more then they are me> because I dont want to be in a situation like I am now. Well I didnt > give the best answer on a couple questions the rest I felt very good > about. There was also a written part and I tried to cover all the parts > that I could think of but I dont do good under pressure like that.> > Well during the interview I kept saying to myself, oh I see how this > is. Their group is very small only 3 developers, 1 dba, and its a web > group, they are growing but they really dont have standards, or project > plans, or use really any software methodology. They dont have cross > training, they dont offer 24/7 support for their shop they dont really > have a good relationship or open communication or formal way of doing > things,they do have a development, test and production environment but > really no rules in place. Which you all probably dont understand that > but its a big thing and it makes for a very disorganized, > dysfunctional, and completly hectic area. But sometimes it can be> for the better if people are open to change.> > I dont have to have another job, I dont have to go anywhere and I have> another interview in a few weeks for another position at another > entity actually it was the place I worked at before and I would> only go back there because my computer forensic degree would fit> perfect and there would be a place I could move up too.> > So why does it bother me so? I dont know but I do need to let it go.> > the other thing my bipolar daughter calls up last night crying and > carrying on that she is going to kill herself and all this because > she cant live that way anymore, yada yada, My mom took that over> and went and got her and then drug her down to the clinic this > morning for some medication. I am not happy about her being here> and have told her this is her very very last chance, from here > she will go to a shelter because she has about a week to get all her > phone calls made and her life on track so she can take care of > herself and her baby.> > I need to take my dog to the vet I have 2 dogs I have taken to the vet> this week, seems everything is falling apart around me. and its tough > to breathe!> > Sandie> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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