Re: tell the school?

September 23, 2004

ABSOLUTELY tell them. I've been in with guidance, the vice principal and

the on-site counselor there for any other concerns ie., substance abuse, mental

health issues, etc.

Not that it really did any good, as they did not excuse any more absences

than they already had, and now she's in her last year trying to make up

credits. The VP was quite sympathetic, but like you said, they dont know the

half

of what I'm talking about. All I could do was direct them to the web sites

and give them a general on BPD itself. They have to research it themselves to

get the jist of the problem. Altho they all ask me the same thing, if my

daughter's been classifed? Dont know exactly what that means. I've heard all

I

would get is maybe some financial aid from the state. That wont help her in

any way.

Debbie

September 23, 2004

I too have been reluctant to get the school involved. My daughter is very

intelligent but has a severe lack of motivation and is now repeating 10th grade

since she just decided to skip most of her classes last year and didn't earn

enough credits. She's on academic probation and we met with the school

counselor right before school started. At that meeting my daughter seemed very

motivated, talked about going to college to become a psychologist - scary

thought. Her history has been that she'll do well for a couple weeks, then

slowly start falling behind, then give up and start skipping classes. We're two

weeks into the school year and she's already missing classes. As a result I

have been seriously considering bringing the counselor into the loop about her

diagnosis. My daughter doesn't have many friends and she usually will fall into

a group of " challenging " children and she'll usually be in the wrong place at

the wrong time - I didn't want to let the school know because I

didn't want them to automatically blame her for things that she may not have

done - ie, last year calling 911 and reporting bomb at the school - she was

questioned but nothing more.

My nephew is bipolar and was at the beginning stages of an " episode " and stated

he didn't want to go to school anymore, he wanted to be home schooled. My

sister eventually did get him to school yesterday and then decided to go chat

with the principal - she reported a very positive and for the mostpart helpful

experience. This has encouraged me and so I think I will be calling and talking

with the counselor today - right after I speak to the attendance counselor who

left a message for me to call - yikes! I plan to bring in my folder on my

research about BPD so that in case the counselor is not familiar with the

diagnosis they can at least read something about it.

I'll let you know how the meeting goes.

Diane

ann kuehnel wrote:

I was wondering . . do you all tell the school that

your child has BPD? I have not shared this info w/

the school or w/ most of my family. I'm not sure what

to do. I don't think mental illness is well-accepted.

I teach and can spot some mental illness here and

there in kids, but no one seems to ever say it!!

Seems that bi-polar which is less common than BPD is

talked about freely, but that's about it. I know that

my daughter's social problems are because of her BPD,

especially her fear of abandonment, but I don't know

if it would help to tell the staff. Also, she doesn't

have an IEP. She was tested once but not eligible.

Does the dx of BPD entitle them to an IEP?

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September 23, 2004

I too have been faced with " Do you tell the school or not? " In my experience

with this, the answer is definatly " YES " tell them about his/her mental illness

and educate them if they are not aware of what it is or how it affects them. If

they still have questions that you can't answer, talk to the childs therapist

and ask if they wouldn't mind giving a call to the school and explaining more to

them. The more the school is aware, the more they can better understand some of

the childs behavior. The guidence counselor at my daughters school is very

understanding and also lets me know every little thing that happens so that her

theripist can talk with her in sessions about it. She also has let me know that

her behavior DOES NOT exclude her from being expelled either, as she was

expelled last year for the remainder of the year (which was about 2 1/2 months)

for making false allegations against a male teacher that she got " FIXATED " on.

The school had to put a stop to her disrupted behavior

at some point and that was the final straw. I can't blame them for it either,

the school system has a reputation to keep and can't be in the media spotlight

over false allegations. By the way, the allegations WERE FALSE, just to let

everyone know that, because sometimes even though they say things like that it

doesn't mean that they are NOT true. My daughter stood up in the middle of her

math class and announced that she was pregnant with " MR. X " baby. And of course

she had been suspended SEVERAL times and spent SEVERAL times in ISS(in school

suspension) over the entire school year and her comment was the last straw. She

was actually suspended for 365 days and I had to beg and plead with the

principal to let her back in untill she goes to RTC, because if she is suspended

from school, NO RTC can take her as she has to be enrolled in school. Of course

we went through the talk with my daughter that there wil BE NO exceptions, you

mess up just 1 time and your out. Now I'm just waiting

on her to figuer it out that she could get herself kicked out, and not be

excepted into the RTC in about 2-3 weeks. GOD FORBID that she figures it out,

because then I will have nothing left to do except weekly sessions at therapist

and home schooling, which means I will ALWAYS be with her 24/7 and we all need

some kind of break from BPD's even if it is just for a couple of hours to keep

our own sanity in check.

My advise is to tell the school, it will make a difference!!!!!!!!!

Diane wrote: