Re: Having a bad moment

[Guest guest]

hi , sorry to hear your feeling down at the moment. It does'nt

matter how strong or optomistic a person you are there's always going to be

days like that especially at the start. I'll probably have one tomorrow even

though i feel fine today! It's not easy when your most precious baby is

finding things dont come as easy as they should do.But to look on the bright

side, everything your son was doing in the park that evening was perfectly

natural to him,at his age he wont be thinking about what he can and can't

do.Ibet he had a great time with his mum in the park. Until my daughter was

about 4 her family nickname was " baby big face " . This was because she was so

baby-like, and the park was a nightmare,i virtually had to climb all the

frames with her.[ i think i was known as the mum with the problem.] Anyway

she's 5 now ,and if i even tried to show her any help in the park these

days, i think it would be the end of our friendship, if you know what i

mean. Things will get better i'm sure, i know in our case my childs speech

did not really take of until her tone and strength became better,so the

park,walks,swimming were all great things to do. Anyway take care. Jane.

[ ] Having a bad moment

> I just have to vent. I just brought my son to the park because I

> worked today and it was such a beautiful night out. Anyways, we go

> to the park and there are two other children there with their

> pregnant moms. Well one of the kids pushed a few times and I

> sad no no really soft and nicely, the mom was not paying attention at

> first and then she finally told her son to say he was sorry, and he

> did. Well then she went on to say, that boy is much younger then you

> so be careful and nice. So I asked how old her son was and she said

> 2. I said actually my son will be 3 next month. But I was so

> depressed the whole way home. He will be three next month and still

> with 18 months of a lot of different therapies does not say on single

> word except babble like a baby. And he can't climb like a 2-3 year

> old because of his low tone and sensory issues. I just get so

> depressed about it sometimes and this is one of those moments.

[Guest guest]

Michele,

Sorry to hear things are down for you right now. I've been having a down

month too. It took us nearly three years of fertility treatments and one

miscarriage to have our son, so I understand all of your feelings re:

wanting to get pregnant and seeing so many pregnant women everywhere you go,

etc... I hope your luck changes! KIM

[ ] Having a bad moment

> I just have to vent. I just brought my son to the park because I

> worked today and it was such a beautiful night out. Anyways, we go

> to the park and there are two other children there with their

> pregnant moms. Well one of the kids pushed a few times and I

> sad no no really soft and nicely, the mom was not paying attention at

> first and then she finally told her son to say he was sorry, and he

> did. Well then she went on to say, that boy is much younger then you

> so be careful and nice. So I asked how old her son was and she said

> 2. I said actually my son will be 3 next month. But I was so

> depressed the whole way home. He will be three next month and still

> with 18 months of a lot of different therapies does not say on single

> word except babble like a baby. And he can't climb like a 2-3 year

> old because of his low tone and sensory issues. I just get so

> depressed about it sometimes and this is one of those moments.

[Guest guest]

I have these moments every time I go to the park and see typically

developing kids. But, my kid is sweeter that these others and is

working his butt off to learn to speak and catch up with the motor

skills. Our children have a very hat=rd job to do. Let's praise them

and tell them they are the best!!

Jean

[Guest guest]

Dear ,

When my daughter was your son's age ( she is now 12 ) we often dealt with the

same issues. Even now I see a surprised look on peoples face when they hear

she is twelve, because her speech is unusual.

I remember feeling sad, mostly for her, because I worried what the future

would hold. It has not been an easy road, but I have to say we have both become

much stronger and closer as a result. Through her disability she has shown me,

and many others what courage and determination will do. Her issues are part of

the beautiful person that she is and that I would not trade for anything.

Also, as you meet others in support groups, you will see there are many

others who are dealing with conditions or disabilities, that will make you thank

God that you were spared.

Don't waste a precious day with your child freting over what they are not,

try to use the time helping them discover what they can be.

Hope this helps cheer you, and we are all glad to be here for you to vent to.

regards, n

[Guest guest]

we all have a reason to vent and you should. my grandson is also going to be

three and he wears between 12 & 18 months in clothes. He also does not

speak, has developmental delays, & several other disabilities. people think he

is 1. He gets therapies in the home but they don't seem to be too effective.

He is 1 of 5 grandchildren for us and they are all Special Needs of different

things. Go ahead and vent. You deserve it and good luck getting your 2nd child.

Grandma to

Cassandra-a Valga, a Vara; Scoliosis, Psychological Disorders Due to

Child abuse by natural father(we adopted her), Learning Disabilities,

Seizures, - Autism, PDD, OCD, Scoliosis, Lumbar Lordosis, Magennis

Syndrome , MR , Bipolar, Sensory Deprivation, Hypotonia, Tony OCD, ADHD

Star Cerebral Palsy, Learning Disabilities Macrocephaly, Plagiocephaly,

Urinary reflux, Heart murmur, Seizures, Silver Syndrome, Growth Hormone

Deficiency, Feeding disorder, Non Verbal

[Guest guest]

Michele Hello,

I read your message and it struck my heart. When my oldest was about

12 Months old we decided we wanted our kids close in age so we began

trying. Nothing would work and I felt horribly depressed because

like you everyone I knew was pregnant. One day I sat with my midwife

and just bawled like a baby. lol But she made an important point

and a suggestion for me. Basically she said I was trying too hard and

needed to just let it go and not try. I know this sounds silly but

once I was able to let it go and not worry about it guess what, It

worked!! Less than 3 months later I was pregnant. Just a thought for

you, GOOD LUCK, Crystal

> I just have to vent. I just brought my son to the park because I

> worked today and it was such a beautiful night out. Anyways, we go

> to the park and there are two other children there with their

> pregnant moms. Well one of the kids pushed a few times and I

> sad no no really soft and nicely, the mom was not paying attention

at

> first and then she finally told her son to say he was sorry, and he

> did. Well then she went on to say, that boy is much younger then

you

> so be careful and nice. So I asked how old her son was and she

said

> 2. I said actually my son will be 3 next month. But I was so

> depressed the whole way home. He will be three next month and

still

> with 18 months of a lot of different therapies does not say on

single

> word except babble like a baby. And he can't climb like a 2-3 year

> old because of his low tone and sensory issues. I just get so

> depressed about it sometimes and this is one of those moments.

>

> Not to mention I have been trying to get pregnant for 10 months

with

> number 2 and besides an early miscarriage in June I am having no

> luck. So seeing pregnant women everywhere is depressing to me too,

> and all my friends with typical children are calling to let us know

> they are pregnant, it is like I get a call a week from someone with

> the news. I know I sound awful but I wish I could catch a break

for

> once. I have so many issues to deal with my first child I would

love

> to have a second child and everything to go smoothly this time. Am

I

> asking to much?

>

> Sorry to vent, just need to get it out.

>

> Michele

[Guest guest]

It all sounds so familiar. I've had people teling me that they think my

youngest is 1 becuse she's so small, and people who can't believe the oldest

is coming up on 3 1/2 becuase she doesn't talk. It can be terribly

frustrating. :-(

Back before we had the girls we tried for 3 years. Nothing worked. During

that time I was told that I should see another specialist to look into

anything else. We decided to take a break because it was getting to me so

bad I was constantly depressed. Of course right about then my little sister

called me and told me she was pregnant. Like that helped. :-( 18 months

later we went to the other specialist and were told there was no possibility

I would be able to have children. So we decided to just move on,

concentrate on work, and we'd adopt later. 3 months after that final

verdict I was pregnant. The doctor still doens't know how I was able to

carry her as long as I did (36 weeks). He told me the odds of it happening

again were very slim. Hope (see why she got her name) was 8 months old and

I was pregnant the second time.

So like Crystal our secret was not to think about it. After Faith was born

I told the doctor if he was going to tell me the odds were slim of it

happening again I wasnt' believing a word he said. I wanted the pill and

that was that. Actually I had wanted a tubal post-partum but since she was

preemie they wouldnt do it. Now we can mostly relax. Hubby had a vasectomy

and just got the 6 week test back. :-)

Toni

[ ] Re: Having a bad moment

Michele Hello,

I read your message and it struck my heart. When my oldest was about

12 Months old we decided we wanted our kids close in age so we began

trying. Nothing would work and I felt horribly depressed because

like you everyone I knew was pregnant. One day I sat with my midwife

and just bawled like a baby. lol But she made an important point

and a suggestion for me. Basically she said I was trying too hard and

needed to just let it go and not try. I know this sounds silly but

once I was able to let it go and not worry about it guess what, It

worked!! Less than 3 months later I was pregnant. Just a thought for

you, GOOD LUCK, Crystal

> I just have to vent. I just brought my son to the park because I

> worked today and it was such a beautiful night out. Anyways, we go

> to the park and there are two other children there with their

> pregnant moms. Well one of the kids pushed a few times and I

> sad no no really soft and nicely, the mom was not paying attention

at

> first and then she finally told her son to say he was sorry, and he

> did. Well then she went on to say, that boy is much younger then

you

> so be careful and nice. So I asked how old her son was and she

said

> 2. I said actually my son will be 3 next month. But I was so

> depressed the whole way home. He will be three next month and

still

> with 18 months of a lot of different therapies does not say on

single

> word except babble like a baby. And he can't climb like a 2-3 year

> old because of his low tone and sensory issues. I just get so

> depressed about it sometimes and this is one of those moments.

>

> Not to mention I have been trying to get pregnant for 10 months

with

> number 2 and besides an early miscarriage in June I am having no

> luck. So seeing pregnant women everywhere is depressing to me too,

> and all my friends with typical children are calling to let us know

> they are pregnant, it is like I get a call a week from someone with

> the news. I know I sound awful but I wish I could catch a break

for

> once. I have so many issues to deal with my first child I would

love

> to have a second child and everything to go smoothly this time. Am

I

> asking to much?

>

> Sorry to vent, just need to get it out.

>

> Michele

[Guest guest]

Amen to that, Jean! I look at my son struggling to talk and I think how truly

amazing he is. He is so determined. There are parents out there that I have

had the displeasure to meet that think my son is not a good model for their

children just because he can't talk well. I think the opposite. Their child

should

be so lucky to have my son for a friend. He (like all of our kids) has SO much

to offer.

Jeannine, proud mommy to Ian, 2.9 (DSI and verbal apraxia) and Colin, 17

mths (possible apraxia, as well)

> I have these moments every time I go to the park and see typically

> developing kids. But, my kid is sweeter that these others and is

> working his butt off to learn to speak and catch up with the motor

> skills. Our children have a very hat=rd job to do. Let's praise them

> and tell them they are the best!!

>

> Jean

[Guest guest]

Jeannine-I am so excited to tell you and everyone that my severely

apraxic, DSI and now, fragile X son can blow!!!!! It is the most

exciting thing ever in my life (besides his first tooth!). Oral

motor work is essential. We only started it a year and a half into

speech therapy. I am so proud of my son.

mom to Harry (almost 3.5)

-- In , " jeanninegollihur "

<j9drew@a...> wrote:

> Amen to that, Jean! I look at my son struggling to talk and I

think how truly

> amazing he is. He is so determined. There are parents out there

that I have

> had the displeasure to meet that think my son is not a good model

for their

> children just because he can't talk well. I think the opposite.

Their child should

> be so lucky to have my son for a friend. He (like all of our kids)

has SO much

> to offer.

> Jeannine, proud mommy to Ian, 2.9 (DSI and verbal apraxia) and

Colin, 17

> mths (possible apraxia, as well)

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Michele,

I know how you're feeling -- I imagine that all of the parents in this

group do. We love our children, accept them as they are and do

everything we can for them, and all would be fine if we could close out

the world.

As for speech: I remember reading that apraxic kids typically start to

talk in their third year. Your son's speech will come, especially since

he is getting speech therapy. Do you give him Pro-EFA?

Anecdote: While pregnant, I signed up for a breastfeeding class at the

hospital where my son was to be born. My son was 4 weeks early, 3.1

pounds, and spent his first month in intensive care. Seven days after

his birth, I attended the class. After all, I still needed to learn

about breastfeeding, especially pumping. In the class were lots of

mothers-to-be. I sat in the front row so I wouldn't have to see everyone

turn around and look at me when I asked a question. I explained my

situation to the instructor. At that moment, I felt like everyone in

that room was thanking their lucky stars that they weren't me. I sat

through the class and took notes and cried the whole time.

Thus I embarked on a journey. And I tell you this -- it's five years

later and I cry a lot less and it no longer breaks me (usually) when my

son is the odd one among his peers. You too will arrive at that place.

We parents of special needs children have gained strength and wisdom a

few decadesearly and that's pretty good, don't you think?

Hope I've been some help.

Audrey

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[Guest guest]

Michele,

I know exactly what you are going through. I am going through the exact same

thing. is 3 1/2 with absolutely no words, only babbling. He tries to

say some words when we specifically tell him to say it, but it all sounds the

same, vowel sounds only (mostly ahhhh). I too would love to get pregnant

with a second, but have been trying unsuccessfully for almost a year. I did

have

a hard time concieving , so it is really no surpise, but every month I

get more depressed. I am so scared for my son's future, and although being in

this group has helped me with alot of information, it has made me even more

nervous because I see other children who at least have some words, yet

has none. Well, just wanted to let you know that you are definitely not alone

and it is okay to have those bad moments...we wouldn't be human if we didn't,

right.....

Take care,

Heidi

[Guest guest]

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