you might be a red neck if

[Guest guest]

-- Part of your computer is held together with duct tape.

-- You think a surge suppressor is a pill for diarrhea.

-- You keep trying to figure out why your scanner won't pick up police

radio calls.

-- You think a megabyte is a new sandwich at Mcs.

-- You have to ask someone how to spell LOL.

-- When birds fly across your screen you reach for your shotgun.

-- You put a mousetrap on your desk.

-- Your yard is full of old computers stacked on cinder blocks

-- Your computer stand is made of a stack of old tires or 2 x 8's and

cinderblocks.

-- You think www is a URL is a logo for a wrestling organization.

-- Someone tells you they're " locked up " and you ask if they need bail

money.

-- You think Mirabilis is a new brand of smokes.

-- You see the " shift " key and try to figure out how to change gears.

-- Your screen saver is a confederate flag and plays Dixie.

-- You think a hard drive is a trip to Uncle Bubba's.

-- When you turn your computer on you say, " Come OOOOOOON Betsy. "

-- You think system wizard is a dude in a funny hat.

-- Your mouse keeps knocking over your spit can.

-- You stomach overlaps half of your keyboard.

-- You try to figure out how to get your empty beer cans into the

recycling bin.

-- You play Frisbee with your CD Rom.

-- You use Your CD-ROM drive as a beer holder.

-- You think 64 M RAM is a new big block engine for your pickup.

-- You think ICQ is how smart your computer is.

-- Someone tells you that your computer has a bug and you reach for the

can of Raid.

-- You think a mouse pad is where Mighty Mouse and his cousins hang.

-- You think your homepage is where you really live.

-- You give directions to a website that include a person, animal, or

old barn.

-- You think MB stands for " More Beer. "

-- You see the word Download, and take the shells out of your shotgun.

-- You think the person that made your keyboard was dumb 'cuz the

letters aren't in order.

-- You think CD stands for Cow Dung.

-- You think GIF stands for " Goodie It's Free. "

-- You think Geocities is a place to buy little cars.

-- You see the word " Refresh " and reach into the cooler for another

beer.

-- You're in a chat room and someone asks where you're from and you

reply, " My momma. "

-- You see the word " Website " and start looking for spiders.

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