wacma:NCC Venting Letting some pressure go .. long

[Guest guest]

Good morning everyone,

I wanted to write yesterday to ask for help in controlling the anger when

everything seems to be suffercating you.

I hate to whine , and it is very hard for me to ask for Help sometimes, but

last week was a bad, bad week for me .

As , I had said a few weeks ago, I am going thru a slow detox to get off

vicoden , they gave me a patch called Catapres, to help with night sweats,

and emotional stability. I was immune to the Vic's so it is time for

something new. New doc also wants me to lower my dose of Baclofen to help

with fatigue.. Sure trade muscle spasm and extra pain for fatigue, guess you

can bet I havent cut down on that to much.

In two weeks I will start Pro-lo therapy, and for that I was told I had to

quit smoking or the dr. wouldnt do the injections. Just great!!!

So I quit 5 days ago . Bravo.. yeah .. whatever... Another thing I have to

trade in. Im handling it pretty good, Grrrr .... I bought some patches,

and they are helping Im sure, , but I also have a smoking hubby, who was

going to be my partner, and his slipping is really ( )issing me off.

To top it off Mother Nature decided it was my week,( me who never has but

2-3 cycles a yr) making my emotions just on that perfect edge of throwing the

towel in, or biting someones head off.

Hubby is working OT alot to keep away I believe now, which is probably good,

because I know I dont want anyone looking at me, touching me or around me

, but that is very hard with a family ,thankfully I only have one at home and

she (12yo) is very good, but also can get my blood boiling. Stress , noise,

and bright lights only makes my pain worse.

I just had a eval. with the new dr. and she also agrees with my pcp I am not

depressed. I really dont know about that right now.

So what do you think is this still withdrawal??? , my hubby loves to blame

it on that, like I asked to get sick and have to take meds that can have

effects.

I told him, to pack his things and hit the spare room yesterday, he told me

to go visit my Mom in N.C . Hmm, I think we are due for a time out .....

we are over it now , but jeez, I dont get the out of control ANGER and

tears I am having.

Not much positive in my life right now I guess , I am just taking it day by

day and waiting .

Maybe I should let my family deal with their own problems for a day or two

until I get stable again.. I believe that is what I Yelled about yesterday

to them. by the time I am done being a mom and a wife , I am so tired I dont

do anything for myself . I need a codependant meeting again I guess, this

Maid dont get Paid ..and the answer is NO.. I did learn that once... but who

is going to listen to a screaming maniac. send me a chill pill, or chocolate

that always works.. LOL

I guess I need a vacation, or treat myself for one day, just wish I felt

like driving to get there. TAXI !!!!!

Just KICK me and tell me to straighten up...ok

If you made it this far, go ahead , I am bending over.... lol

Thanks in advance for listening... Dawn from Michigan