Fwd: HUM: Cultural Differences Explained (***1/2) (fwd)

[Guest guest]

Cultural Differences Explained

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Aussies: Dislike being mistaken for Pommies (Brits) when abroad.

Canadians: Are rather indignant about being mistaken for Americans when

abroad.

Americans: Encourage being mistaken for Canadians when abroad.

Brits: Can't possibly be mistaken for anyone else when abroad.

Aussies: Believe you should look out for your mates.

Brits: Believe that you should look out for those people who belong

to your club.

Americans: Believe that people should look out for & take care of

themselves.

Canadians: Believe that that's the government's job.

Aussies: Are extremely patriotic to their beer.

Americans: Are flag-waving, anthem-singing, and obsessively patriotic to

the point of blindness.

Canadians: Can't agree on the words to their anthem, when they can be

bothered to sing them.

Brits: Do not sing at all but prefer a large brass band to perform

the anthem.

Americans: Spend most of their lives glued to the idiot box.

Canadians: Don't, but only because they can't get more American channels.

Brits: Pay a tax just so they can watch four channels.

Aussies: Export all their crappy programs, which no-one there watches,

to Britain, where everybody loves them.

Americans: Will jabber on incessantly about football, baseball, and

basketball.

Brits: Will jabber on incessantly about cricket, soccer, and rugby.

Canadians: Will jabber on incessantly about hockey, hockey, hockey,

hockey, and how they beat the Americans twice, playing baseball.

Aussies: Will jabber on incessantly about how they beat the Poms in

every sport they play them in.

Americans: Spell words differently, but still call it " English " .

Brits: Pronounce their words differently, but still call it " English " .

Canadians: Spell like the Brits, pronounce like Americans.

Aussies: Add " G'day " , " mate " and a heavy accent to everything they say

in an attempt to get laid.

Brits: Shop at home and have goods imported because they live on an

island.

Aussies: Shop at home and have goods imported because they live on an

island.

Americans: Cross the southern border for cheap shopping, gas, & liquor

in a backwards country.

Canadians: Cross the southern border for cheap shopping, gas, & liquor

in a backwards country.

Americans: Drink weak, pissy-tasting beer.

Canadians: Drink strong, pissy-tasting beer.

Brits: Drink warm, beery-tasting piss.

Aussies: Drink anything with alcohol in it.

Americans: Seem to think that poverty & failure are morally suspect.

Canadians: Seem to believe that wealth and success are morally suspect.

Brits: Seem to believe that wealth, poverty, success and failure

are inherited things.

Aussies: Seem to think that none of this matters after several beers.

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