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Re: BPD & Children

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Hi,

While I agree with you on diagnosing BPD, I'm wondering how many did see signs

at an earlier age when they reflect on earlier years. I look back and see

several " indications " but we just didn't know what more to do. I was always so

frustrated about not knowing how to " help " her or correct problems better.

My DSD was considered a non-compliant " strong-willed " child from the day I met

her (around age 2 1/2). She was prone to temper tantrums when she couldn't have

her way. She had separation issues when we took her to school. She was

non-compliant quite often in school and we constantly got notes home for either

agressiveness or her becoming overly upset about a situation.

She also from an early age would blame something/someone else for things - even

when falling and bumping into a chair she would blame the chair for hurting her.

She " tested " everyone (teachers, babysitters, etc.) She quite often told lies

and once stole a gold graduation ring from her tutor (and had quite an elaborate

cover story).

It always seemed to me she couldn't be good at school and home at the same

time...it was either/or. School was a constant struggle.

She was gifted with artistic ability and creativity but never focused enough to

develop them. She still has a very outgoing and engaging personality. She was

diagnosed with ADD (non-hyper) at an early age, but the ritalin just never

seemed to help.

Her BM exacerbated the problem. Abandonment issues came up and she quite often

tried to use DSD as a pawn. It was even apparent in custody cases that she

manipulated and coached DSD in what to say to psych. counselors.

I could go on, but was just wondering if others had similar experiences in the

younger years.

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Yes, actually I relate to that. My daughter was the same way, but no one

knew about this at that time. I took her to therapists, but there was never

much progress made, and the older she got, the more determined she was to

manipulate her way out of it. Now she's over 18, and I cannot force her to

go, and she will not admit to a problem. Most of her life she has been the

" victim. " Not much I can do now I guess, except change the way WE react to

her, and hope that she will eventually get counseling.

N

>

>Reply-To: WTOParentsOfBPs

>To: WTOParentsOfBPs

>Subject: Re: BPD & Children

>Date: Fri, 13 Aug 2004 10:49:22 -0700 (PDT)

>

>Hi,

>

>While I agree with you on diagnosing BPD, I'm wondering how many did see

>signs at an earlier age when they reflect on earlier years. I look back

>and see several " indications " but we just didn't know what more to do. I

>was always so frustrated about not knowing how to " help " her or correct

>problems better.

>

> My DSD was considered a non-compliant " strong-willed " child from the day

>I met her (around age 2 1/2). She was prone to temper tantrums when she

>couldn't have her way. She had separation issues when we took her to

>school. She was non-compliant quite often in school and we constantly got

>notes home for either agressiveness or her becoming overly upset about a

>situation.

>

>She also from an early age would blame something/someone else for things -

>even when falling and bumping into a chair she would blame the chair for

>hurting her. She " tested " everyone (teachers, babysitters, etc.) She

>quite often told lies and once stole a gold graduation ring from her tutor

>(and had quite an elaborate cover story).

>

>It always seemed to me she couldn't be good at school and home at the same

>time...it was either/or. School was a constant struggle.

>

>She was gifted with artistic ability and creativity but never focused

>enough to develop them. She still has a very outgoing and engaging

>personality. She was diagnosed with ADD (non-hyper) at an early age, but

>the ritalin just never seemed to help.

>

>Her BM exacerbated the problem. Abandonment issues came up and she quite

>often tried to use DSD as a pawn. It was even apparent in custody cases

>that she manipulated and coached DSD in what to say to psych. counselors.

>

>I could go on, but was just wondering if others had similar experiences in

>the younger years.

>

>

>

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I've noticed that a great many of you are recalling your daughters being the

" victim " when they were growing up and always blaming someone else for their

problems. This seems to be quite prevalent in them as children and teens,

however I've also gone back and read again all the definitions and/or

characteristics of BPD and I can't seem to find any professional reference to

the " victim "

mentality and the blame game in the literature. Am I missing something here

or is that an accurate assessment of the professional point of view.

My daughter's victim feelings probably started at around 4 when she went to

nursery school and would come back and say no one played with her. This

continued through present day. She had one " close " friend who was a neighbor

and 3

years older than , but her mother and I were friends and the girls did

everything together summers and after school, but there was always the whining

of what " did " to her or toys taken from her, etc. Looking back, I

realize I always blamed , who was older, and took my daughter's side, of

course, even though my younger son, would tell me it was not 's fault.

But,

my daughter was so completely believable, with the tears and the apparent

lies.

I wish I could go back. I wonder if we were on top of this behavior in the

beginning if it would have made her and my life better today.

When my grandsons come to me now with a tale of possible ill treatment by

another child, I discuss it with them, and tell them to try to work it out

themselves and that seems to be the end of it. I see no victim behavior in them

as

yet.

Jean

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I can relate way back as well. My now 25 year old son was 7 years old

when he first was diagnosed with ADD and was always in trouble in

school. Actually he got thrown out of Catholic kindergarden first, (i

forgort that ). He would chew on pencils, throw books, punch, anything

to disturb the class, run away from school. (AT the time I was away in

another state trying to learn a new job and my ex was in construction

during the day, and needless to say we had no cell phones then), so they

couldn't reach the ex and would call me a state away when my 7 and 8

year old son would run.

His troubles just grew and continued with age. His father , my ex,

divorced me when my son was 11, and I tried to move back with the father

and of course it did not work and left again when my son was 13.

At 17, I met my current husband who was sober at the time, now he is not

and of course blames his drinking again on the fact that out of the

almost 8 years married , I have had to have full attention on my ADD,

dyslexic, cross-addicted, bi-polar , and now BPD son, plus my mother got

sick with cancer and the onset of Alzteimer's and I have POA as I am the

only child.

Anyway, just last week my son was released early from a dual diagnosed

rehab- because he raged at a nurse. ( Hello, is not rage part of the

disease) And then when he got home 14 days early, to find out he maxed

out his Access Card, and this Med-Plus will not pay for his medication.

So , I know it is a matter of time before he drinks again or tries his

sucide attempts.

Before rehab, between May and 1 month ago he tried 5 times, that is why

they maxed out his medical card. So now, he has no insurance either.

Mind you he has been disabled since he was 17, diagnosed with BPD. but ,

now no medical insurance.

So, I live One Day At A Time with this disease.

He is currently living with his girlfriend's sister until their

apartment is ready in Sept. I know he should not even be in this

relationship, but, it is better than the streets as he has exhausted all

places where he can stay. I live 1 hour away. Sometimes that is good,

but sometimes it is not. ( Especially when it concerns my mother ) it

is too far,

And it looks like when my checks finally go through( I had to file for

Social Security Disability) I was diagnosed with Adjustment Disorder

with Depressed mood LOLOL), I will be looking at a second divorce.

WEll, the good news I turn 50 on Monday, and everyday, I learn more and

more to appreciate whatever little happiness i find in life, whether

friends on the computer, a growing flower, taking a walk, when my son

is my son and this horrible disease is not on the surface, (even 10

minutes) I live for the moment.

Did i mention he was and is the only adult child I had from my first

marriage. I never dreamed this would be the life he would have.

I look at the friends who children have graduated high school, got a

drivers license, had normal dates, got married, had children, went to

college, in there. What it was suppose to be. This is a very

heartbreaking disease. You can divorce a spouse or girlfriend or

boyfriend but, what do you do with your children an only child at that.

I pray for all you parents out there and your children as I pray for me

and mine

Grabarczyk wrote:

>Yes, actually I relate to that. My daughter was the same way, but no one

>knew about this at that time. I took her to therapists, but there was never

>much progress made, and the older she got, the more determined she was to

>manipulate her way out of it. Now she's over 18, and I cannot force her to

>go, and she will not admit to a problem. Most of her life she has been the

> " victim. " Not much I can do now I guess, except change the way WE react to

>her, and hope that she will eventually get counseling.

>N

>

>

>

>

>>

>>Reply-To: WTOParentsOfBPs

>>To: WTOParentsOfBPs

>>Subject: Re: BPD & Children

>>Date: Fri, 13 Aug 2004 10:49:22 -0700 (PDT)

>>

>>Hi,

>>

>>While I agree with you on diagnosing BPD, I'm wondering how many did see

>>signs at an earlier age when they reflect on earlier years. I look back

>>and see several " indications " but we just didn't know what more to do. I

>>was always so frustrated about not knowing how to " help " her or correct

>>problems better.

>>

>> My DSD was considered a non-compliant " strong-willed " child from the day

>>I met her (around age 2 1/2). She was prone to temper tantrums when she

>>couldn't have her way. She had separation issues when we took her to

>>school. She was non-compliant quite often in school and we constantly got

>>notes home for either agressiveness or her becoming overly upset about a

>>situation.

>>

>>She also from an early age would blame something/someone else for things -

>>even when falling and bumping into a chair she would blame the chair for

>>hurting her. She " tested " everyone (teachers, babysitters, etc.) She

>>quite often told lies and once stole a gold graduation ring from her tutor

>>(and had quite an elaborate cover story).

>>

>>It always seemed to me she couldn't be good at school and home at the same

>>time...it was either/or. School was a constant struggle.

>>

>>She was gifted with artistic ability and creativity but never focused

>>enough to develop them. She still has a very outgoing and engaging

>>personality. She was diagnosed with ADD (non-hyper) at an early age, but

>>the ritalin just never seemed to help.

>>

>>Her BM exacerbated the problem. Abandonment issues came up and she quite

>>often tried to use DSD as a pawn. It was even apparent in custody cases

>>that she manipulated and coached DSD in what to say to psych. counselors.

>>

>>I could go on, but was just wondering if others had similar experiences in

>>the younger years.

>>

>>

>>

>>

>>

>

>_________________________________________________________________

>FREE pop-up blocking with the new MSN Toolbar - get it now!

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>

>

>

>

>Send questions & concerns to WTOParentsOfBPs-owner . " Stop

Walking on Eggshells, " a primer for non-BPs can be ordered via 1-888-35-SHELL

(). For the table of contents, see http://www.BPDCentral.com

>

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,

I have a 26yo BP son - an only child - and I have done it on my own since he was

16 - my ex took off and abandoned both of us - she had actually abandoned us

mentally and emotionally some time before that - and my son took it very badly

and this is when he was first presented with rage outbursts and anti-social

behaviour. Had to take him out of school , ect, etc. He was first diagnosed with

depression when he was 19, bi-polar when he was 23 , and BP last year - a very

long road. It seems that his original abandonment issues go back to his birth as

my ex had post-natal depression for 3 years after he was born and never really

" bonded " with him after that.

I also never pictured that this would be my life and am also sad that my son may

not have a " normal " life - I have all my fingers crossed all the time. I have

had 5 relationships since my divorce 10 years ago - and they have all gone the

same way - the last 2 of these only lasted a few months each and this is sad - I

should have recognised the patterns before so I have decided to take a break

from relationships and look after myself - I don't have any energy to maintain a

relationship and be a care-giver for my son at the same time, and also look

after myself and stay sane.

I started the " 8 Step Program " at the local mental health institute last week- a

ten week course based on a book " Hiden Victims, Hidden Healers " by Tallard

and published by PEMA Publications in 1988 - ISBN 0-9640430-0-9. It is

highly recommended here in Australia to help care-givers of psychiatric patients

who have conditions such as BP and schizophrenia. There are 9 of us in the group

- most of the people have schizophrenics in their lives - one has a bipolar -

but there is one young guy whose partner is BP - and they have 2 young children.

I am very glad to be able to relate to someone else face-to-face. I have also

enrolled in a uni course in Creative Writing by distance education to keep my

mind active and to do something creative. And I have got back into my local

community through a local environmental group and neighbourhood association.

I suppose what I am trying to say is - it IS ONE DAY AT A TIME, but you have to

look after yourself and do work on yourself. I also have a counsellor who I see

once per month. I have had some good news lately with my son - in the last 4

months he has been stable - no rages - attentive to my needs and others (who he

likes) - and a joy to be around most of the time - he is trying very hard -

except that my " guard " is still up because I don't trust his stability at this

stage - still walking on eggshells. This has been the result of intensive CBT

therapy on a weekly basis for about 15 months with a very good psychologist, a

better and more consistent medication regime (he only takes an SSRI and Xanax -

no more anti-psychotics or mood stabilisers), better control and lower intake of

his marijuana smoking (I know this is weird but it does control his rage moods),

and no alcohol or other nasties at all. He recently tried to get into the local

DBT program at the public hospital, but had a fight with the convenor. The

convenor wouldn't allow him to continue taking Xanax while he was on the program

- no one can understand this? I am not sure if he would have gone that well as

all of the other intakees were girls and he has an issue with females. I think

that he does better with one-to-one therapy and wouldn't warm up to group

therapy that well - I may be wrong - he may be able to do this at some future

time. He is much more cognitive of his moods and triggers and he has learnt to

take evasive action - most of the time anyway. I have recently used the " horse

whisperer " technique that I learnt in these posts - and I must say it has some

potential to be useful. I am not able to introduce " tough love' techniques

really much at all. I need to work on this.

Hang in there .....

Chris.

Re: BPD & Children

>>Date: Fri, 13 Aug 2004 10:49:22 -0700 (PDT)

>>

>>Hi,

>>

>>While I agree with you on diagnosing BPD, I'm wondering how many did see

>>signs at an earlier age when they reflect on earlier years. I look back

>>and see several " indications " but we just didn't know what more to do. I

>>was always so frustrated about not knowing how to " help " her or correct

>>problems better.

>>

>> My DSD was considered a non-compliant " strong-willed " child from the day

>>I met her (around age 2 1/2). She was prone to temper tantrums when she

>>couldn't have her way. She had separation issues when we took her to

>>school. She was non-compliant quite often in school and we constantly got

>>notes home for either agressiveness or her becoming overly upset about a

>>situation.

>>

>>She also from an early age would blame something/someone else for things -

>>even when falling and bumping into a chair she would blame the chair for

>>hurting her. She " tested " everyone (teachers, babysitters, etc.) She

>>quite often told lies and once stole a gold graduation ring from her tutor

>>(and had quite an elaborate cover story).

>>

>>It always seemed to me she couldn't be good at school and home at the same

>>time...it was either/or. School was a constant struggle.

>>

>>She was gifted with artistic ability and creativity but never focused

>>enough to develop them. She still has a very outgoing and engaging

>>personality. She was diagnosed with ADD (non-hyper) at an early age, but

>>the ritalin just never seemed to help.

>>

>>Her BM exacerbated the problem. Abandonment issues came up and she quite

>>often tried to use DSD as a pawn. It was even apparent in custody cases

>>that she manipulated and coached DSD in what to say to psych. counselors.

>>

>>I could go on, but was just wondering if others had similar experiences in

>>the younger years.

>>

>>

>>

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No - I don't think she was/is BP - however, she did have bouts of depression

after the intial 3 years and had a lot of counselling - I did, however, suspect

that she was sexually abused as a young child - she was very uptight about sex

in general and our physical relationship was very strained. She really didn't

warm up to motherhood very well at all - I would come home from work and she

would hand me my son and go into her room for the rest of the night to read or

to do some sort of art. She would read fantasy stuff or new age stuff - off in a

world of her own.

Chris.

Re: BPD & Children

Hi Chris

Is it possible your ex-wife had BPD also? Was she a good mother after the

initial 3 years following your son's birth?

Jean

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