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Hi Francisco.

It is great that you have such a wonderful support system there. You should get a pre-op meal plan in there. Follow that to the letter and exercise and that weight will come off. You can get rid of that 25 pounds in no time. Also remember your water. It will really help when you start to feel hungry and it isn't time to eat quite yet. Also weigh and measure your food that way you are not accidentally eating to much.

June is not an unrealistic goal and you can do it. I myself have set a goal for June. I want to lose 26 ponds by the 7th. Ah, to be at 250 by my 47th birthday for me would be a great birthday present from me to me.

We can do this together.

Ramona

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Hi everyone, I am Mae, 52 and I am from the Modesto area, in central Ca.

I had Open, with Dr. Basil Meyerowitz 1/27/03.

321/260, and feeling great. Had no problems after surgery. and can do things I haven't been able to do in a couple of years.

I go to the YMCA and do pool exercises.

I feel like God has gave me a new life. I am so happy to just be alive. This surgery was the best thing for me.

Good luck to everyone!

Hugs, Mae

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You will find that this is a great support group. You can always get answers here and everyone is very helpful. I started out at 289 lbs. and as of today I have lost 100 lbs. It is a miracle. and on 4/14 it will have been 5 months.

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  • 2 months later...
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HI Folks,

Well I recently had a birthday and For my birthday I wanted to weight

250. I had been at a plateau for a while and wasn't going anywhere. I

had a few problems last week and want able to weight all weekend so I

didn't know whether I had made my goal or not. Well On Monday when I

went to the gym I weighted in at 248.6 that was so exciting. Now I

have another short term goal of getting to 225 by September first.

This is all so exciting for me. I have to go through my clothes again

because there are some things there which are really quite loose. So

it will be nice to free up some more space in my drawers.

Ramona

1/13/2003

357/248/?

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HI Folks,

Well I recently had a birthday and For my birthday I wanted to weight

250. I had been at a plateau for a while and wasn't going anywhere. I

had a few problems last week and want able to weight all weekend so I

didn't know whether I had made my goal or not. Well On Monday when I

went to the gym I weighted in at 248.6 that was so exciting. Now I

have another short term goal of getting to 225 by September first.

This is all so exciting for me. I have to go through my clothes again

because there are some things there which are really quite loose. So

it will be nice to free up some more space in my drawers.

Ramona

1/13/2003

357/248/?

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  • 1 month later...
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Francisco,

I regret that I haven't had a chance to get to know you in person! I think I was

at one Richmond meeting before my surgery, and I know you were there. I am

always SO impressed by your honesty and sensitivity in your postings. You have

wonderful insight, and are willing to share your experiences, even the

emotionally painful ones, to help others. I always take your words of

encouragement, even if directed toward someone else, to heart. You have great

wisdom and openness.

Thank you!

--

Eleanor Oster

eleanor@... (personal address)

www.smallboxes.com/gastricbypass.htm

Berkeley, CA

Open RNY 07/15/2003

Kaiser Richmond (CA)

P. Fisher, M.D.

Start (05/09/2003) 319 / Current ~270 / Goal 150

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Francisco,

I regret that I haven't had a chance to get to know you in person! I think I was

at one Richmond meeting before my surgery, and I know you were there. I am

always SO impressed by your honesty and sensitivity in your postings. You have

wonderful insight, and are willing to share your experiences, even the

emotionally painful ones, to help others. I always take your words of

encouragement, even if directed toward someone else, to heart. You have great

wisdom and openness.

Thank you!

--

Eleanor Oster

eleanor@... (personal address)

www.smallboxes.com/gastricbypass.htm

Berkeley, CA

Open RNY 07/15/2003

Kaiser Richmond (CA)

P. Fisher, M.D.

Start (05/09/2003) 319 / Current ~270 / Goal 150

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Francisco,

Once again, you send an inspiring message

of hope and love and forgiveness. I am glad you discovered the “magic”

of this surgery. You are soaring high and are an inspiration to us all.

Hugs,

Pat B.

Checking in

Hi and everyone else.

I just wanted to share a bit about my experience

going back to work

because it is similar to what has happened to you.

A brief intro to the newbies: welcome and good

luck on your journey.

You're worth the effort! I began my wls

process on Aug 5, 2002 when

I weighed 315 lbs. My surgery was on June 3,

2003 and my most recent

weigh-in with the doctor (Dr. Fisher at Kaiser

Richmond, my hero) was

great: 88 lbs gone! Dr. Fisher and I

discussed my favorite issue,

the one that has been a barrier to past weight

loss success:

boundaries. Mine had always been so

weak. I used eating to ease my

pain from child sexual abuse, and I felt more

comfortable with an

armor of fat to protect myself and to take myself

out the sexual game.

But before the surgery I used the time to get help

and to help

myself. I talked about this issue in support

groups, talked to

health care professionals about the boundary

issue, and I

read, " Boundaries: Where You End and I

Begin " by Anne which

have all changed my life. I watched Dr. Phil

and learned to change

my internal dialogue; I no longer tell myself that

I'm bad or

disgusting or not worthy of love. While I'm

still a work in

progress, I no longer allow boundary violations

against me. The fact

that I have allowed myself to protect my best

interests—in all

aspects of my life, emotional, physical,

spiritual—has enabled me and

empowered me to achieve a level of self worth and

esteem that I never

thought possible. I can now look at

" before " pictures without self-

loathing and disgust, and finally, finally just

love that big guy. I

see the smile that tries to hide what's below the

surface, but his

eyes mirror the pain and horror of past boundary

violations. I look

at him and feel what I'd feel for anybody else,

especially for a

friend or family member: unconditional

love. AND I don't love him

because he allowed me to lose the weight.

I've been able to lose the

weight because I began to love him first. I

love him for all his

human frailty, but especially for his gentle

warmth and his loving

heart. He's deserved my love for a long

time. Why did I deny him

the love I'd so freely given to others?

Regarding the co-workers, I told five people at

work (26 total

employees in my office)—two are normal

weighted people, three are

morbidly obese. The two normal weighted

people have given me a level

of support that has deepened our friendship.

The 3 morbidly obese

people betrayed me in a way I never expected: they

told others in the

office what I was going through when I had

specifically told them

that I didn't want others to know yet. One

week before my surgery we

were supposed to go out to dinner to

" celebrate " my upcoming surgery,

and they left me waiting at the restaurant with no

call, no nothing

(I had gone with the 2 normal weighted people, so

I was not totally

alone), and I was very hurt by that

incident. Those three cut off

communication with me and didn't call me in the

hospital, didn't

email me, didn't call me at home while I

recovered. The other

wonderful people in my life showed me who really

cares. They

showered me with love and support.

So I discussed them with Dr. Fisher and

others. Dr. Fisher told

me, " Get those people out of your

life. " He helped me make the

decision to cut them off. We are still

cordial in the office, but I

don't share anything with them because they can't

be trusted. I have

a new strong boundary that allows me to protect

myself and feel good

about myself. Others in the office (who have

been told about my

surgery by the betrayers) have asked me how I lost

so much weight,

but I politely reply, " I watch what I eat,

and I exercise one hour

every day. " If they continue to pry, I

say, " I don't feel

comfortable discussing it. " Why do they

need to know? You should

see the disappointed look on their faces.

They don't understand that

the surgery is not magic; I'm the magic. The

health care team at

Kaiser is the magic. Following the program

is the magic. Getting

support from folks like you all is the magic.

I can't take on their weight issues. I can

only deal with me. I've

tried to help them before (taking them to support

groups, giving them

all the info of Kaiser's Bariatric Program), but

they are all talk

and no action, and a total waste of my time and

efforts. So now I am

free of their negativity. I simply won't be

poisoned by their

bitterness. The other day one of them was

loudly complaining about

how big her a** is while she was eating Ruffles

chips from a Costco-

sized bag. I felt sorry for her, but I can't

help her if she won't

help herself. Her bitterness repels

me. She wallows in self-pity

and tearing others down but does nothing to make

the situation

better. I won't be part of that

anymore. The other two have simply

chosen to give me the cold shoulder.

I've never been better off. I thought these

people were my friends.

But—unknowingly or not—they pushed me

away. The normal weighted

support people have (unrelated to my wls process)

started a period of

team building and mutual support in our work

group. We are becoming

closer as we take on tasks at work as a

team. We build each other up

as we feel the stresses of work encroaching.

And they understand the

magnitude of what I've achieved, and they express

that to me and

relate it to the struggles in their lives.

But deep down I know this truth. Having

support is invaluable, but I

have to rely on me. No one can make this

miracle happen but me.

Each of us in born with two wings (I heard this

from Suze Orman):

the wing of Will and the wing Grace. The

wing of Grace represents

God's love and mercy—His Grace toward

us—and it will beat hard and

strong for us from the day we are born until the

day we die. The

wing of Will represents what we bring to

life. It represents our

choices and efforts in the struggles of everyday.

When we finally get our wing of Will to beat as

hard and as strong as

the wing of Grace… we can soar. I'm

finally taking flight. And the

freedom I feel makes my heart swell with gratitude

and beauty and

peace.

I hope each of you finds that feeling too.

Francisco

-88 lbs

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Francisco: You are so inspiring. The words you speak keeps my will strong.

People are amazingly influencial in our everyday lives, one way or another.

Hopefully we take what we hear and see and use it to help our growth in life.

Sadly instead of learning positive things from negative people they always

seem to easily affect us by making us negative.

I got out of a marriage for that very reason. No matter what everything was

negative, nothing gave him pleasure, and everyone around him was " wrong " . My

life became a living hell, I became someone I didn't recognize, walking around

with a dark cloud over my head. Then one day I said enough is enough. That

was the being of my road to happiness (Which by the way I'm still working on).

The divorce helped get me on track to my happier self. My want to make

myself healthier and getting my surgery was another step. And working on

spending

my spare time with those I love to be around is another step towards success.

Life is full of ups and downs, we just need to learn how to handle all the

roller coaster rides. Thank you for being there with such wonderful works to

inspire. Stay close to us, we need you.

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Pat:

You're also part of the " magic " I've found, as are all the wonderful

support people I've met on line and in person.

I remember the first time I saw you at a meeting at SSF Kaiser, and I

thought, " She must be the wife of someone who's gonna have surgery. "

Imagine my surprise when I found out it was YOU who had had the

surgery.

I remember the group had a big laugh when a humorous woman asked Dr.

Gity, " Am I going to look like that (referring to you) after the

surgery? " I went back to my support people and told them about how

great you look, but the deeper inspiration came from your words.

You inspired me to embrace exercise in a way I never had before. I

had been resisting the message that I would have to exercise for the

rest of my life. I finally just said to myself, " Just Do It. It

works for her, why won't it work for you? "

I started out with small baby steps, but now I'm going strong. And

now, believe it or not, if I miss my exercise, I don't feel so

great. The exercise helps with my weight loss, but more importantly,

it balances out my emotions, and I feel such a sense of

accomplishment when I've done my hour of " me time. "

God's blessings to you,

Francisco

-89 lbs

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:

Congratulations on all your success. Your accomplishments help us

all to realize that we can make positive changes in our lives too. I

need you all too!

Francisco

-89 lbs

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