Re: it seemed better....and then it got worse.

[Guest guest]

Jacquie,

I hate that feeling. The pain you feel when your child is hurting.

Myabe there is another child with a name similar in another class. I

told Greggory for weeks to stop talking about a little girl that

didnt exist. Then I found out she did exist. Ugh. Kids can be so

cruel too. We all know this. Half the boys on Greggory's soccer team

make fun of him. The others ignore him for the most part. Hopefully

will make a friend. Just one friend will make a difference.

Greggory has also been saying that he doesnt want to go back to

school but I can tell he has been havinbg a good time even though I

know the transition has been hard on him. I feel for you and .

Jacquie H

>

> At 3pm, I went to sign in at the office and check on . The

principal told me no; she said she'd checked on him a couple times

and he was doing great on his own. So I waited outside with the

other moms.

>

> He came out, he hugged me, he smiled. He had a bag of gummy bears

from his teacher. (he doesn't like gummy bears)

>

> We went and rented a video for him as a treat.

>

> I asked him to tell me a good thing about today. He said he played

tag at recess.

>

> We got home and he said, " I have good news and bad news and

wonderful news. " This is where it started to go wrong. The good

news: he likes his teacher. The bad news: " I hate gummy bears. "

The wonderful news: " I played tag with Talisa. " There is no such

child. Nor a . This 'friend' does not exist.

>

> I asked him if he sat at the desks to do his work. They're set up

in pods of four. Yes, he did. Greggory was sitting next to him

(not a child I know, but I heard the name at roll call) " then

Greggory moved and I was all alone. " Noone at the other desks in

that group? " No. " Why did Greggory move? " he didn't want to sit

beside ME. So I sat at the desk beside the teacher. "

>

> As if THAT didn't hurt my stomach and my heart enough, then he went

for the big whammy. All summer he's been so proud, saying, " I'll be

six and I'll be in grade one. " Today he looked me straight in the

eye and said, " I don't want to be six. I want to be five. I want to

be with Mrs Magloughlen (his kindy teacher). I don't want to go to

school tomorrow. I don't want to go to school ever again. I don't

want to be in grade one. "

>

> <sigh>

>

> This is killing me. Still I haven't cried. If I could just have a

good cry maybe it would be easier to bear.

>

> Jacquie

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

>>>>>>>>

At 3pm, I went to sign in at the office and check on . The principal

told me no; she said she'd checked on him a couple times and he was doing

great on his own. So I waited outside with the other moms.

<<<<<<<<

Huh? I know you are ok with this Jacquie, and that does best when you

aren't there, but....you really should have the authority to check on your

child.

>>>>>>>

We got home and he said, " I have good news and bad news and wonderful news. "

This is where it started to go wrong. The good news: he likes his teacher.

The bad news: " I hate gummy bears. " The wonderful news: " I played tag

with Talisa. " There is no such child. Nor a . This 'friend' does not

exist.

<<<<<<<

I would ask his aide directly what was doing at recess.

>>>>>>>>

I asked him if he sat at the desks to do his work. They're set up in pods

of four. Yes, he did. Greggory was sitting next to him (not a child I

know, but I heard the name at roll call) " then Greggory moved and I was all

alone. " Noone at the other desks in that group? " No. " Why did Greggory

move? " he didn't want to sit beside ME. So I sat at the desk beside the

teacher. "

<<<<<<<<

Um, I don't get it....why did the teacher allow this?

>>>>>>>

As if THAT didn't hurt my stomach and my heart enough, then he went for the

big whammy. All summer he's been so proud, saying, " I'll be six and I'll be

in grade one. " Today he looked me straight in the eye and said, " I don't

want to be six. I want to be five. I want to be with Mrs Magloughlen (his

kindy teacher). I don't want to go to school tomorrow. I don't want to go

to school ever again. I don't want to be in grade one. "

<sigh>

This is killing me. Still I haven't cried. If I could just have a good cry

maybe it would be easier to bear.

<<<<<<<<<<

I wish I had words to help you Jacquie. As I said before, I've still got

that wrench in my tummy. Transitions are HARD. No matter WHAT you do to

prepare, it's just damn HARD. I'm ready to call an IEP meeting just so

everyone on the team can sit in one room and everyone can be on the same

page......Do you think that's something you should do?

{{{{Jacquie}}}}

There are plenty of shoulders here to cry on if you need 'em.

Penny

[Guest guest]

For what it's worth, Jacquie....

.......Hopefully

will make a friend. Just one friend will make a difference.

>>>>>>>>

I agree with this.

At our last pedi visit, our doc said " The one thing I want is for Jacqui to

have one GOOD friend " .

She knows what she's talking about.

Penny :-D

[Guest guest]

Jacquie, could you let the teacher know what kind of candy likes so she

could give that to him? Also, are there any kids from kindergarten that

knows in there with him? Didn't he have a buddy system last year? Maybe

something like that again this year?

I'd talk to the teacher, let her know your concerns, see what she knows about

autism. should not have to sit by himself. The teacher should change the

seating arrangement so this does not happen.

Good luck.

Janae

, 9, ADD

Jake, 6, autism

[Guest guest]

(((((JACQUIE)))) I hope finds a friend. I hate how cruel kids can be. I

know it breaks your heart as well. Yes, go cry and have a glass or two of wine.

Amie

it seemed better....and then it got worse.

At 3pm, I went to sign in at the office and check on . The principal told

me no; she said she'd checked on him a couple times and he was doing great on

his own. So I waited outside with the other moms.

He came out, he hugged me, he smiled. He had a bag of gummy bears from his

teacher. (he doesn't like gummy bears)

We went and rented a video for him as a treat.

I asked him to tell me a good thing about today. He said he played tag at

recess.

We got home and he said, " I have good news and bad news and wonderful news. "

This is where it started to go wrong. The good news: he likes his teacher.

The bad news: " I hate gummy bears. " The wonderful news: " I played tag with

Talisa. " There is no such child. Nor a . This 'friend' does not exist.

I asked him if he sat at the desks to do his work. They're set up in pods of

four. Yes, he did. Greggory was sitting next to him (not a child I know, but

I heard the name at roll call) " then Greggory moved and I was all alone. "

Noone at the other desks in that group? " No. " Why did Greggory move? " he

didn't want to sit beside ME. So I sat at the desk beside the teacher. "

As if THAT didn't hurt my stomach and my heart enough, then he went for the big

whammy. All summer he's been so proud, saying, " I'll be six and I'll be in

grade one. " Today he looked me straight in the eye and said, " I don't want to

be six. I want to be five. I want to be with Mrs Magloughlen (his kindy

teacher). I don't want to go to school tomorrow. I don't want to go to school

ever again. I don't want to be in grade one. "

<sigh>

This is killing me. Still I haven't cried. If I could just have a good cry

maybe it would be easier to bear.

Jacquie

[Guest guest]

> told me no; she said she'd checked on him a couple times and he was doing

> great on his own. So I waited outside with the other moms.

> <<<<<<<<

>

> Huh? I know you are ok with this Jacquie, and that does best when you

> aren't there, but....you really should have the authority to check on your

> child.

I was ok and not ok with that. I have a tenuous relationship with the

principal at best, and didn't feel too comfortable with her straightforward

'no'...but I am remarkably timid around authority figures. If she'd said

no without telling me she'd seen him with her own eyes, I mighthave pressed

the issue, but when she said she'd checked on him a couple times and he was

settling in, I just felt...um...cowed.

> alone. " Noone at the other desks in that group? " No. " Why did Greggory

> move? " he didn't want to sit beside ME. So I sat at the desk beside the

> teacher. "

> <<<<<<<<

>

> Um, I don't get it....why did the teacher allow this?

WELL, here's where things get dicey. Telling my mom about this incident,

she reminded me of all the times as a child I would lie capriciously, just

to say something. Like the time my neighbor told me he'd been to see the

Santa Claus parade (!!!!! for a four-year-old) and I told him I'd been

riding in Santa's sleigh during the parade -- when the truth was I couldn't

even be bothered to watch it on TV. Now, that is exactly something

would do -- he does it all the time. He had told my mom on the phone that

he'd sat beside Greggory -- not a WORD about Greggory moving away from

him...so then *I* asked him, and he told me Greggory moved away and then he,

, was PLAYING DOMINOES with the teacher...

So who the hell KNOWS what really happened!!!

> I wish I had words to help you Jacquie. As I said before, I've still got

> that wrench in my tummy. Transitions are HARD. No matter WHAT you do to

> prepare, it's just damn HARD. I'm ready to call an IEP meeting just so

> everyone on the team can sit in one room and everyone can be on the same

> page......Do you think that's something you should do?

>

I'm going to wait it out. Around here, you get branded as a reactionary

nuisance if you jump in to that too soon. The IPRC is in October, and then

the IEP...I'm going to give him two weeks at school before I start

insisting we move forward.

Tonight he told me, without being asked, that he's going to try not to cry

tomorrow. I told him that's very strong and brave of him, but if he wants

to cry he should go ahead and do it.

> {{{{Jacquie}}}}

>

> There are plenty of shoulders here to cry on if you need 'em.

Thanks. :-)

Seeing so many parallels between my childhood and 's, I feel sorry for

my mom that she never had a group like this. (she was regaling me with my

own climbing stories tonight) She basically raised with a massive

vocabulary all on her own.

Jacquie

[Guest guest]

((((((((((Jacquie)))))))))

That just sucks. I hope the teacher is doing

something to help him socialize.

Tamara

--- The Hunny Family wrote:

>

> At 3pm, I went to sign in at the office and check on

> . The principal told me no; she said she'd

> checked on him a couple times and he was doing great

> on his own. So I waited outside with the other

> moms.

>

> He came out, he hugged me, he smiled. He had a bag

> of gummy bears from his teacher. (he doesn't like

> gummy bears)

>

> We went and rented a video for him as a treat.

>

> I asked him to tell me a good thing about today. He

> said he played tag at recess.

>

> We got home and he said, " I have good news and bad

> news and wonderful news. " This is where it started

> to go wrong. The good news: he likes his teacher.

> The bad news: " I hate gummy bears. " The wonderful

> news: " I played tag with Talisa. " There is no such

> child. Nor a . This 'friend' does not exist.

>

> I asked him if he sat at the desks to do his work.

> They're set up in pods of four. Yes, he did.

> Greggory was sitting next to him (not a child I

> know, but I heard the name at roll call) " then

> Greggory moved and I was all alone. " Noone at the

> other desks in that group? " No. " Why did Greggory

> move? " he didn't want to sit beside ME. So I sat

> at the desk beside the teacher. "

>

> As if THAT didn't hurt my stomach and my heart

> enough, then he went for the big whammy. All summer

> he's been so proud, saying, " I'll be six and I'll be

> in grade one. " Today he looked me straight in the

> eye and said, " I don't want to be six. I want to be

> five. I want to be with Mrs Magloughlen (his kindy

> teacher). I don't want to go to school tomorrow. I

> don't want to go to school ever again. I don't want

> to be in grade one. "

>

> <sigh>

>

> This is killing me. Still I haven't cried. If I

> could just have a good cry maybe it would be easier

> to bear.

>

> Jacquie

>

>

> [Non-text portions of this message have been

> removed]

>

>

=====

Tamara

mom to :

Ebony, 4 yrs -- asd, ADHD, bi-polar

, 1 year

wife to:

Terry, love of my life

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

> Jacquie, could you let the teacher know what kind of candy likes so

she could give that to him? Also, are there any kids from kindergarten that

knows in there with him? Didn't he have a buddy system last year?

Maybe something like that again this year?

>

Buddy system? Bwahahahaha!!!!!!!! Wrong school.

<sigh>

Jacquie