Re: Fw: the escape, the trauma, the aftermath

[Guest guest]

What an awful experience Amy!

((((((((((((Amy and Kep))))))))))))

I hope after you've had a good cry (or 2 or 3) you'll feel better and calmer.

Take a deep breath and put this day in your experience box---and leave it

there. Yes, that happened, Thank God everyone is okay.

kandie (mom to , who at 5 years old did a couple of things like

that....one thing was walked down the street to a woman's house, went into

her front room and started obsessing about her chairs)

Kandie and (9 years)

* 's website: <A

HREF= " http://kidsactivities.homestead.com/spage.html " >spage</A>

*

[Guest guest]

>>it. I'm so glad you guys understand. For those of you that have been

there, are they required to report us to CPS? Should I expect a visit? I

don't really care, just wondering. Anyways, I'm going to go stitch for a

while.

>

Oh, AMY!

(when you sent this to me, I sent a reply but it bounced. That's the third

time I've gotten a bounce off your ivillage account today, as I kept trying

to email you privately. you need to check that out...)

What a horrifying day. There is nothing more I can say except it could have

happened to any of us. We ALL feel safe when the fortress locks are

engaged. (((hugs)))

As for a visit from CPS, yes, you'll get one. Here, whenever a police

report is filed children's aid MUST be notified. That said, it was not a

traumatic thing at all, to have them come. The guy who came to us was not

thinking in the direction of " take the kid " , he ws thinking along the lines

of, " help this family secure their home so that this won't happen again. "

The police can tell how you're feeling, and it was quite obvious you were

distaught and terrified and a wreck. That will go in the report. No one is

thinking that you were just negligent or apathetic or abusive. The police

report on 's trip to the roof noted that I was " pale, visibly shaken,

and possibly in shock " . Cops are not cruel people, and they will have taken

note of your obvious distress. It will all be fine.

I cannot BEGIN to imagine how you felt, mostly because it makes ME feel like

throwing up.

I am SO relieved that Kep is ok, although I do wish he was a little less ok

and a little more frightened. :-(

(((hugs)))

Jacquie

[Guest guest]

Amy,

Alec was taken to the station once when he escaped the first time.

The never called COPS although they said they were about to because

they thought he was deaf as he didnt respond at all to anyone. They

did tell me that he went quite willingly with them in the squad car

and he really liked looking at the soda machine. ~ugh~ The next time

he escaped they brought him home just as Jeff was running out the

front door yelling his name. Again they didnt call CPS. I am glad he

is ok but I totally know the feeling of panic and the terrible

feeling that something worse could easily have happened.

Jacquie H

>

> the escape, the trauma, the aftermath

>

>

> I tried sending this to the group, but for some reason, it's not

going through. Will you let me know if you get it, and then forward

it for me? Thanks.

>

> I am a bit calmer now (thanks to my sister's ativan) so I will tell

the complete tale.

>

> The Escape:

> I was in the basement rearranging things, doing laundry, cleaning

up. Cam was sleeping as he had worked very late last night. Bethany

had spent the night at my sister's and was still there. Kep was

(supposedly) in the living room watching Scooby Doo. Both doors were

locked and both of the bolts (high up on the doors) were thrown. Some

how he managed to balance himself on the arm of the rocking chair,

undo the bolt, and let himself out the door. He was probably gone for

about 20 minutes before I came upstairs and saw the door open. I

immediately knew that Kep was not hiding in the garage, but that he

was GONE. I also knew immediately that he was in danger. Mother's

intuition. I screamed for Cam and flew out the door.

>

> The Trauma:

> I began running down the road, screaming Kep's name. This was

extremely difficult as I have bronchitis. After 20 ft I could barely

breathe. Cam caught up with me and took over the yelling. Just as we

get to the end of the cul-de-sac, an elderly couple pull up in their

van. I asked them if they had seen a small boy and they said, " the

police have him up at the corner. " I started bawling. I have never

run so fast in my life. The police met me first to let me know that

he was fine. I just sat down in the grass and continued crying. I

think I scared them because I was having so much trouble breathing.

Cam walked over to the cruiser to find Kep, half naked, jumping up

and down in the front seat. He was having a blast. The police took

our names and address (I assume I'll get a visit from CPS?) and then

let us know what had happened. Kep had been found by the elderly

couple at the corner of our road and Center street. Center is a major

5 lane road in town. They were able to coax Kep into their van and

then they called the police. The police had tried to ask Kep

questions (and beautifully enough he had told them his name!) but he

was hard to understand and mostly he just kept repeating their

questions. They were just getting ready to take him back to the

station.

>

> The Aftermath:

> Cam nearly nailed the doors shut, I sat in the rocking chair,

holding my son for about a half hour. Kep kept saying, " Mama sad! "

which made me cry harder. I realized that the most dangerous part of

the whole ordeal was the fact that my son WILLINGLY entered a

strangers vehicle. Thank god they had good intentions. What if they

hadn't? Well, I can't let my thoughts go that way. Cameron and I have

spent the day dealing with the situation in our own ways. Cam spent

two hours playing video games with Kep. I cried, called my mom, cried

some more, called my sister, cried, threw up, and then fell asleep. I

DID make it to my doc's appt today and I'll let you all know about

that later. I've been shaking all day and I can't eat. I have never,

ever been so afraid in my life. He drives me nuts sometimes, but....

Well, you all know.

>

> So, I have a thank you letter to write to that elderly couple. I am

also working on an information packet for the police dept. I did this

when we lived in Kazoo, but haven't done one for the local police

here. Time to do that. I am also looking at alarms for the doors. I'm

also more determined to get a therapy dog for Kep. I never, ever want

to go through that again. He's escaped lots of times, but never

gotten very far. Today, well, it could have been disastrous.

Thankfully, Kep's guardian angel was there today.

>

> Thanks for all the words guys. , thank you for reminding me

that this was not my fault. It is hard not to feel guilty. Janae, I

WISH the experience had scared Kep. Unfortunately, I think it was

rewarding to him. He loved the police car and didn't want to leave

it. I'm so glad you guys understand. For those of you that have been

there, are they required to report us to CPS? Should I expect a

visit? I don't really care, just wondering. Anyways, I'm going to go

stitch for a while.

> Amy H---in Michigan

> Kepler 5 yo ASD, Bethany 6 1/2 NT

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>

>

[Guest guest]

Amy,

The first time did a complete disappearance in which the police

actually were involved, yes I got a nice little visit from CPS. I was

expecting one though and had the names and phone numbers for his school

workers ready and I tried my best to explain autism to them and this nasty

little ability to escape. The first lady that came was just sort of a bitch,

for lack of a better word, but the next one that came two days later was

great. She completely understood and helped brainstorm with me ways to keep

him inside. We got a border collie, a great herder dog, various new bolts and

she talked to the local police for me to get them to understand our

situation. She was very helpful. It sucked that I had to go through that, but

when another little autistic boy moved in down the street and he did a

disappearance act and the police were involved it went much easier for them

thanks to my experience and CPS educating the police. Perhaps someone has

already gone through that experience in your town and CPS won't be called,

but if they are they might be able to offer more suggestions or help educate

your local police for you. I know my neighbors were thankful ours already

knew how to deal with the situation:) The new bolts worked, but nowadays

thanks to the dog I don't need them much. Titus (my dog) never lets a kid

outside without following and barks like mad if one of mine leaves the yard.

I also educated all my neighbors and there are not many kids up here at all,

so they know if they see him to return him or alert me. Even if they drive

past and he's riding a bike at the end of the driveway I get a loud honk,

usually I am just on the other side of the driveway and they can't see me,

but it's still nice they alert me:) I might send some flyers out in your

neighborhood with a pic of Kep and some info, so the next time a neighbor

sees him out they can alert you or return him to you.

I'm glad he's safe and sound and your nerves are calming a bit.

Tommi

[Guest guest]

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[Guest guest]

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Yes, Putter, " out " was the problem...

{{{AMY}}}

Oh my God, how absolutely terrifying.

As others have pointed out -- it's NOT your fault and it COULD happen to any

one of us. I will be calling my apartment office now to demand we be

allowed to put a lock high up on the door. Thanks.

I would guess that you could call the police and ask them if they will be

reporting you to CPS, but I don't really know how that works.

I have some groups that might help with the service dog thing. You can

write me privately if you want, but others on the list might be interested.

{{{{{AMY}}}}}

-Sara.

who can't imagine the utter horror at coming up and seeing that door

open...gives me chills and makes me queasy just to think about it. We

called 911 once when we lost Mikey, but he had just crawled into the

stroller and fallen asleep - it was in a corner & facing the wall so we

couldn't see him. We found him before the cop showed up.

[Guest guest]

Hey Putter!! How are you?

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" To be nobody-but-yourself - in a world which is doing its

best night and day to make you everybody else - means to

fight the hardest battle any human being can fight; and

never stop fighting. " - E.E. Cummings

, mom to , 4, AS, ADHD; and , 2, NT

Re: Fw: the escape, the trauma, the aftermath

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[Guest guest]

Oh Amy -

I don't know what to say.....I'd be a basket case...just like you..

That elderly couple sure deserve big, huge hugs....maybe some of US could

send them cards of thanks too.....

Penny