Gwen's Update

[Guest guest]

Gwen, I'm so sorry you are faced with so much at one time. I hope

things start to improve quickly for you.

Lee Ann

[Guest guest]

Gwen, it sometimes does seem that there isn't a light at the end of

the tunnel. I do hope things get better for you soon. Keeping you in

my thoughts.

AmyL

[Guest guest]

Thanks for checking in Gwen, I've been wondering how things were

going. So sorry to hear about your friend, it must have been quite a

shock and one of those really grounding events that we find ourselves

part of every once in a while...but, you've had your fair share of

those events lately!!

Take care,

S

[Guest guest]

Well all: I'm not sure what is going on with me right now....my last

period started 3/25 so today is CD32 and still no period. I normally

ovulate on roughly CD 18 so my period should be due today but there

is no sight of it. I took an HPT this morning just to be sure and it

was negative. (I would have been very surprised at a positive test as

we have been using birth control due to my doctor's suggested 3-cycle

wait afte the miscarriage before trying again, the cycle I am waiting

for would be cycle #.2)

I have been known to ovulate as late as CD23 so I may be having one

of my " late " months and may end up having a 37-day cycle which means

I wouldn't officially be " late " until next Wednesday. So we'll see

what the weekend brings.

My last period (first cycle after miscarriage) only lasted 3 days and

was a bit lighter than prior to the miscarriage, but I was not too

concerned about this as I bled pretty constantly for almost 8 weeks

after the miscarriage, right up until about 10 days prior to the

period so I figured my endometrium might need a bit more time to

regenerate after all that bleeding.

But here's the thing...I am feeling lousy. I am having what seems to

be the world's WORST case of PMS and I am not normally someone who

has bad PMS symptoms.

My breasts have been sore and tender for the last 10 days, I have

been cramping and constipated and bloated all of this week, but

especially bad the last few days....I had a backache all of yesterday

which did improve a bit after some of my constipation was relieved

last night....and I have been very " wet " or " mucousy " for the last

week with this ordorless, colorless mucous. (Not clumpy white like a

yeast infection or anything just clear mucous.)

And now this morning I woke up with this persistent left-sided

abdominal pain. So, I've developed a few theories:

1. I ovulated " late " and have an ovulatory cyst on my left ovary

which has not resolved (this is not uncommon for me, I have had

multiple ovarian cysts in the past.) The other symptoms are a result

of my having WICKED PMS for some reason and I should expect a period

sometime over the weekend or early next week.

LIKELIHOOD: High. This is the most likely scenario but means I'm

going to have a long and uncomfortable weekend. And if this is the

case, I wonder why I would suddenly have such bad PMS? I have

historically had maybe a slight backache and some minor cramping a

few hours before my period starts and perhaps a headache but that's

about it....not weeks of discomfort!

2. My " lighter " period in March was not due to the bleeding from the

miscarriage but indicative of scar tissue reformation in response to

some " missed " fragment after the miscarriage. I have scarred-shut

again and am having persistent abdominal and back pain because

my " active " endometrium is flowing out " backwards " through my

fallopian tubes.

LIKELIHOOD: Pretty low I think. Unlike the heroic Suzanne, my betas

did return to zero within 8 weeks after the miscarriage and after

their return to zero I stopped bleeding almost immediately. This

would seem to make it HIGHLY unlikely that anything was left behind

that could be the cause of new scarring. I've had no infection that I

know of, no bad odor, no fever, no pain until the last couple of days

so it also seems pretty unlikely that I had or have an infection that

has caused scarring. My miscarriage was " natural " (if you call

pumping your body full of drugs natural) and there was

no " instrumentation " of my uterus so no possibility of any new injury

to the uterus so this seems to be the least likely possibility.

3. I ovulated late and have an ovulatory cyst on my left ovary and

am, by some miracle, experiencing some WICKED early pregnancy

symptoms and a repeat HPT in a week or so will be positive.

LIKELIHOOD: Medium. We are using birth control but it is that bio-

adhesive contraceptive gel which is NOT 100% effective, only like 89%

effective and Lord knows that if 11% of women will get pregnant while

using it I'm going to be part of the medical minority, I always seem

to be!! I'm a veritable MAGNET for the " exception to the rule " . If I

did ovulate late, say on day 23, then yesterday's HPT would have been

taken only 9DPO which may have been too early. (Also, I wasn't using

one of those " early " HPT's that says you can test 3 days before...I

was using a regular one.) Also, the last time I was pregnant I had

a " persistent " cyst on my ovary which is what lead them to suspect a

possible ectopic. So this theory remains at least a theoretical

possibility.

So...we'll see what the weekend brings but I am uncomfortable and

crabby and anxious right now and am trying to resist the urge to

freak out. I actually picked up the phone and called my doctor's

office and then put it back down before they answered. If I do have

a cyst and I am not pregnant it will likely resolve on its own a few

days after menstruation, mine usually do.

If I have a cyst and I AM pregnant, they won't do anything to treat

the cyst while I'm pregnant anyway so it doesn't need treatment or

anything.

And If I've somehow scarred again (which seems most unlikely) then

I'll have reason to strongly suspect that by next week if I still

have no period and still have no positive PG test by then.

So, unless I end up in excruitiating pain over the weekend which

seems unlikely, I will wait until mid-week next week and see what the

universe delivers. Either a HEAVY period or a surprise

PG....honestly, I'll be happy with either one so long as I can move

past this horrible " not knowing " stage (and it wouldn't hurt if some

of these symptoms would dissipate either!)

Thanks for listening to my rambling....it really helps just to " think

out loud " like this!

Gwen

[Guest guest]

Gwen dear sorry that you are not "feeling yourself"

Hopefully it will all reveal itself soon

[Guest guest]

Gwen:

The best advice I can give (wish it were as good as all the advice

you give) is get a glass of wine, take a hot bath, get a good movie

and enjoy the weekend. What will be, will be...and it's no fun

stewing when instead it could just be a weekend of pampering! At

least, I hope. I didn't even ask you what your plans were for the

weekend. Well, anyway, you get the idea!!

Keep us posted.

Lots of luck

nancyS

[Guest guest]

Dear Gwen,

In my thoughts I am with you.

There are always some days or even periods like this in the life.

Many hugs and my very best wishes to you!!

Hope you will feel better soon.

SueSie

[Guest guest]

Hi Gwen,

Just wanted to let you know that I'll be thinking about you this

weekend. I hope you get a nice surprise next week; or, at least, the

pain you're having goes away. I know that the waiting is

excrutiating...hang in there...

Take care,