Guest guest Posted December 1, 2009 Report Share Posted December 1, 2009 Nada is a big sucking black hole of neediness... in all situations. You'll appreciate this: She now calls her match.com man " her new retirement plan. " Makes me want to call him but, he's a Social Worker (really), has his own screwed up issues and they met 13 months ago (a record for Nada sticking things out even though she demonizes the man constantly). He's getting something out of playing " hero " to her " waif " .... good luck, Buddy, you're gonna need it. Lynnette > > > > > > > > Nada's storm blew into town late Friday night... within 24 hours she was whining and complaining that she's broke, is bored, everyone is too " busy " to care about " her " , my Grandma (dad's mom) was " short of the phone with her... and what did YOU say to them? " (following Nada's no-show at Thanksgiving in favor of feeding the homeless) and " who have YOU talked to of MY family? " ... etc. etc. etc. I did offer a couple of holiday solutions for her financial situation and even loaned her some supplies... but - after looking in 2 stores for the other part - she said it was a waste of time, etc. She's not in school (going back? I dunno) Her laptop is still fritz'd out (she didn't follow thru on the anti-virus registration when I put it in in JULY so she got a bug and can't fix it (even though I sent her the instrutions immediately - dad or I is " supposed to do that " ). Her lastest housing situation is a drag (already griping about it and she's been there 6-8 weeks). She's mad cause I won't make teen go to her house after Christmas - he doesn't want to, he doesn't have to. And the list goes on and on. > > > > > > > > Her song of discontentment that radiates from her pores is just overwhelming.... but it never changes the song or beat... it's always what everyone did or has done to her... > > > > > > > > The longer I stick out therapy and make myself do what I'm supposed to do for ME and MINE... the more I 1) see her for what/who she is, 2) am amazed at how lifelong and lifestyle pervasive her traits are and 3) feel a twinge of pity for her but mostly hostility at her nastiness when she feels slighted or gets bored. I am proud of teen, however, he told me this a.m. that he purposefully has let his cell battery run out so she won't text him at school ;o) > > > > > > > > I'm not falling into this trap anymore... sure I feel a little bad that I can't just pack up and go play with her to settle her down... but it's not feasible (doesn't she notice the economy and work? I'm lucky to be doing what I'm doing - can't blow it...) nor do I want to take the time only to be bashed for not taking MORE time and spending MORE money to pacify " poor pitiful Nada " all the while being attacked on stuff she's sure I've said/done that is made up/distorted crap. Not gonna happen. > > > > > > > > So, I sit here and write/research/work, do my things, be productive... all the while she sits at dad's (her ex husband of 15 years ago), sleeps late, stays up late, eats, pouts, stalks me on FB/IM/Cell, etc. and wonders why - even though she lived in this area for 5 years - she has no friends. I truly can't save her from herself... but I can save us from her. > > > > > > > > Lynnette > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 1, 2009 Report Share Posted December 1, 2009 That poor man; but hey, whatever floats yer boat, dude. -Annie > > > > > > > > > > Nada's storm blew into town late Friday night... within 24 hours she was whining and complaining that she's broke, is bored, everyone is too " busy " to care about " her " , my Grandma (dad's mom) was " short of the phone with her... and what did YOU say to them? " (following Nada's no-show at Thanksgiving in favor of feeding the homeless) and " who have YOU talked to of MY family? " ... etc. etc. etc. I did offer a couple of holiday solutions for her financial situation and even loaned her some supplies... but - after looking in 2 stores for the other part - she said it was a waste of time, etc. She's not in school (going back? I dunno) Her laptop is still fritz'd out (she didn't follow thru on the anti-virus registration when I put it in in JULY so she got a bug and can't fix it (even though I sent her the instrutions immediately - dad or I is " supposed to do that " ). Her lastest housing situation is a drag (already griping about it and she's been there 6-8 weeks). She's mad cause I won't make teen go to her house after Christmas - he doesn't want to, he doesn't have to. And the list goes on and on. > > > > > > > > > > Her song of discontentment that radiates from her pores is just overwhelming.... but it never changes the song or beat... it's always what everyone did or has done to her... > > > > > > > > > > The longer I stick out therapy and make myself do what I'm supposed to do for ME and MINE... the more I 1) see her for what/who she is, 2) am amazed at how lifelong and lifestyle pervasive her traits are and 3) feel a twinge of pity for her but mostly hostility at her nastiness when she feels slighted or gets bored. I am proud of teen, however, he told me this a.m. that he purposefully has let his cell battery run out so she won't text him at school ;o) > > > > > > > > > > I'm not falling into this trap anymore... sure I feel a little bad that I can't just pack up and go play with her to settle her down... but it's not feasible (doesn't she notice the economy and work? I'm lucky to be doing what I'm doing - can't blow it...) nor do I want to take the time only to be bashed for not taking MORE time and spending MORE money to pacify " poor pitiful Nada " all the while being attacked on stuff she's sure I've said/done that is made up/distorted crap. Not gonna happen. > > > > > > > > > > So, I sit here and write/research/work, do my things, be productive... all the while she sits at dad's (her ex husband of 15 years ago), sleeps late, stays up late, eats, pouts, stalks me on FB/IM/Cell, etc. and wonders why - even though she lived in this area for 5 years - she has no friends. I truly can't save her from herself... but I can save us from her. > > > > > > > > > > Lynnette > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 1, 2009 Report Share Posted December 1, 2009 Lynette - Oh, Lordy, why doesn't your dad change the locks? Seriously - if she plans to come back at Christmas time you guys need to plan a trip out of town (or at least tell her you're going somewhere, then put up privacy drapes and get rental cars for a couple of weeks, so she won't know you're home). Maybe we all need to start a home-swapping network so we can spend the holidays someplace where our Nadas can't find us. > > > > > > Nada's storm blew into town late Friday night... within 24 hours she was whining and complaining that she's broke, is bored, everyone is too " busy " to care about " her " , my Grandma (dad's mom) was " short of the phone with her... and what did YOU say to them? " (following Nada's no-show at Thanksgiving in favor of feeding the homeless) and " who have YOU talked to of MY family? " ... etc. etc. etc. I did offer a couple of holiday solutions for her financial situation and even loaned her some supplies... but - after looking in 2 stores for the other part - she said it was a waste of time, etc. She's not in school (going back? I dunno) Her laptop is still fritz'd out (she didn't follow thru on the anti-virus registration when I put it in in JULY so she got a bug and can't fix it (even though I sent her the instrutions immediately - dad or I is " supposed to do that " ). Her lastest housing situation is a drag (already griping about it and she's been there 6-8 weeks). She's mad cause I won't make teen go to her house after Christmas - he doesn't want to, he doesn't have to. And the list goes on and on. > > > > > > Her song of discontentment that radiates from her pores is just overwhelming.... but it never changes the song or beat... it's always what everyone did or has done to her... > > > > > > The longer I stick out therapy and make myself do what I'm supposed to do for ME and MINE... the more I 1) see her for what/who she is, 2) am amazed at how lifelong and lifestyle pervasive her traits are and 3) feel a twinge of pity for her but mostly hostility at her nastiness when she feels slighted or gets bored. I am proud of teen, however, he told me this a.m. that he purposefully has let his cell battery run out so she won't text him at school ;o) > > > > > > I'm not falling into this trap anymore... sure I feel a little bad that I can't just pack up and go play with her to settle her down... but it's not feasible (doesn't she notice the economy and work? I'm lucky to be doing what I'm doing - can't blow it...) nor do I want to take the time only to be bashed for not taking MORE time and spending MORE money to pacify " poor pitiful Nada " all the while being attacked on stuff she's sure I've said/done that is made up/distorted crap. Not gonna happen. > > > > > > So, I sit here and write/research/work, do my things, be productive... all the while she sits at dad's (her ex husband of 15 years ago), sleeps late, stays up late, eats, pouts, stalks me on FB/IM/Cell, etc. and wonders why - even though she lived in this area for 5 years - she has no friends. I truly can't save her from herself... but I can save us from her. > > > > > > Lynnette > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 1, 2009 Report Share Posted December 1, 2009 I live 4 miles down the road from him... he's already (finally) stopped giving her money...the house thing is an entirely different story. Mainly, he'll let her stay there so she doesn't stay with us and cause more interruptions. However, unbeknownst to her, I took my house-key off her ring last time she left her car here for him to fix (yes, you read it right... he's not doing that again... mainly because the lady at the garage told him he was being a sap!) She completely believes SHE'S ENTITLED! Lynnette > > > > > > > > Nada's storm blew into town late Friday night... within 24 hours she was whining and complaining that she's broke, is bored, everyone is too " busy " to care about " her " , my Grandma (dad's mom) was " short of the phone with her... and what did YOU say to them? " (following Nada's no-show at Thanksgiving in favor of feeding the homeless) and " who have YOU talked to of MY family? " ... etc. etc. etc. I did offer a couple of holiday solutions for her financial situation and even loaned her some supplies... but - after looking in 2 stores for the other part - she said it was a waste of time, etc. She's not in school (going back? I dunno) Her laptop is still fritz'd out (she didn't follow thru on the anti-virus registration when I put it in in JULY so she got a bug and can't fix it (even though I sent her the instrutions immediately - dad or I is " supposed to do that " ). Her lastest housing situation is a drag (already griping about it and she's been there 6-8 weeks). She's mad cause I won't make teen go to her house after Christmas - he doesn't want to, he doesn't have to. And the list goes on and on. > > > > > > > > Her song of discontentment that radiates from her pores is just overwhelming.... but it never changes the song or beat... it's always what everyone did or has done to her... > > > > > > > > The longer I stick out therapy and make myself do what I'm supposed to do for ME and MINE... the more I 1) see her for what/who she is, 2) am amazed at how lifelong and lifestyle pervasive her traits are and 3) feel a twinge of pity for her but mostly hostility at her nastiness when she feels slighted or gets bored. I am proud of teen, however, he told me this a.m. that he purposefully has let his cell battery run out so she won't text him at school ;o) > > > > > > > > I'm not falling into this trap anymore... sure I feel a little bad that I can't just pack up and go play with her to settle her down... but it's not feasible (doesn't she notice the economy and work? I'm lucky to be doing what I'm doing - can't blow it...) nor do I want to take the time only to be bashed for not taking MORE time and spending MORE money to pacify " poor pitiful Nada " all the while being attacked on stuff she's sure I've said/done that is made up/distorted crap. Not gonna happen. > > > > > > > > So, I sit here and write/research/work, do my things, be productive... all the while she sits at dad's (her ex husband of 15 years ago), sleeps late, stays up late, eats, pouts, stalks me on FB/IM/Cell, etc. and wonders why - even though she lived in this area for 5 years - she has no friends. I truly can't save her from herself... but I can save us from her. > > > > > > > > Lynnette > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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