Re: So much going on this week....Argggg!!!!

[Guest guest]

Tamara,

Try not to look at it as them giving up on her. It sounds more like the

state trying to save money! I'd go ahead and look into the personal care

worker she mentioned and see what it's all about.

Good luck.

I hope feels better soon!

sue

[Guest guest]

Tamara,

I know how you feel. The PT, 3 years age, wrote a report that she

felt there was no need to continue with pt because he was too

hyperactive. What a crock. Its probably a money issue. Theyre always

looking to cut corners.MA doesnt know Tamara personally, so they

cant say its useless. Anyways, maybe Ebony needs some other type of

intervention. ABA is only useful for awhile. has made a lot of

progress since being in his new school, where they do TEAACH and

fairly high level academics. I see that Ebony is bipolar. is

going to be evaluated for this due to some noticable mood swings.

Sorry your baby is sick, it seems that these infections spread. How

horrible for everyone.

Take care,

Thea

> First, I would like to apolige for ignoring you guys

> the last few days.

>

> I had my wisdom teeth out on Tuesday. My stepdaughter

> moved into her first apartment on Wednesday. Thursday

> we moved furniture around and painted and cleaned

> carpets and put up wall boarders, etc in the kids'

> room.....we now have an awsome boys'(nascar

> everything!!) room and ebony's room (barbie, of

> course!). Very very cute. We have been sharing a

> room with the baby and now that we got another

> bedroom, we get our own!!!!!

> Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

>

> Also, I had to take to the doctor today....pink

> eye and an ear infection.....yuck! So I've now got a

> sick boy hanging on me. Go figure.

>

> My other bad news is that I finally got a call back

> from the autism project that had been doing Ebony's

> home therapy. Apparently, she will no longer qualify

> for therapy after next month. So, I could choose to

> re-start her program but it would only be for a few

> weeks!! So why even bother!! They said that MA has

> been denying all claims for children who have not made

> significant progress and in two and a half years Ebony

> had made very little. So She gave me the number

> to MA and said to call and ask them about getting her

> a personal care worker (?). Never heard of this

> before, but to me it sounds like they are giving up on

> us! I was totally balling my eyes out after that

> call. :( What does this mean?????? She no longer

> needs someone to teach her skills because it is

> useless???

>

> Thanks for always being there everyone. Please

> understand if I don't respond to all the posts from

> this last week.....I will try to get through some of

> them tonight and the rest will have to be deleted

>

> I feel sooooo sad and hopeless.........

> Tamara

>

>

>

> =====

> Tamara

> mom to :

> Ebony, 4 yrs -- asd, ADHD, bi-polar

> , 1 year

> wife to:

> Terry, love of my life

>

> __________________________________________________

>

[Guest guest]

> Did I

> tell you guys we had to board up her windows cause she

> was breaking them and also got them open and got out.

> She now has pink boards over her windows to go with

> Barbie and no windows.

Oh, Tamara. Did she get cut with glass very badly? That is AWFUL.

How is the new arrangement working to keep her from running so much? Has it

helped?

And you're right, having a high functioning kid I cannot even POSSIBLY

imagine what the state's decision feels like. But when I read it, I felt

like I had a hole in the pit of my stomach. I imagine you feel much much

more than that. :-( I wish there was something I could say...

Let us know the deal with the personal support worker.

Feeling sad,

Jacquie

[Guest guest]

(((tamara)))

There has to be another way to reach her. They can't just give up on her!

I'm really getting depressed.

Everything sucks today.

Sissi

[Guest guest]

Thanks Thea! I know it is a money issue. But still

to say that she does not qualify for what money is

available for this is hurtful. I know ABA wasn't very

helpful for Ebony, but it was something at least.

There are not a lot of other programs in the area.

But I will be looking into some other things and I am

also waiting to hear about this personal care worker

business.

Thanks again,

Tamara

--- theaghoss wrote:

> Tamara,

> I know how you feel. The PT, 3 years age, wrote a

> report that she

> felt there was no need to continue with pt because

> he was too

> hyperactive. What a crock. Its probably a money

> issue. Theyre always

> looking to cut corners.MA doesnt know Tamara

> personally, so they

> cant say its useless. Anyways, maybe Ebony needs

> some other type of

> intervention. ABA is only useful for awhile.

> has made a lot of

> progress since being in his new school, where they

> do TEAACH and

> fairly high level academics. I see that Ebony is

> bipolar. is

> going to be evaluated for this due to some noticable

> mood swings.

> Sorry your baby is sick, it seems that these

> infections spread. How

> horrible for everyone.

>

> Take care,

>

> Thea

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> > First, I would like to apolige for ignoring you

> guys

> > the last few days.

> >

> > I had my wisdom teeth out on Tuesday. My

> stepdaughter

> > moved into her first apartment on Wednesday.

> Thursday

> > we moved furniture around and painted and cleaned

> > carpets and put up wall boarders, etc in the kids'

> > room.....we now have an awsome boys'(nascar

> > everything!!) room and ebony's room (barbie, of

> > course!). Very very cute. We have been sharing a

> > room with the baby and now that we got another

> > bedroom, we get our own!!!!!

> > Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

> >

> > Also, I had to take to the doctor

> today....pink

> > eye and an ear infection.....yuck! So I've now

> got a

> > sick boy hanging on me. Go figure.

> >

> > My other bad news is that I finally got a call

> back

> > from the autism project that had been doing

> Ebony's

> > home therapy. Apparently, she will no longer

> qualify

> > for therapy after next month. So, I could choose

> to

> > re-start her program but it would only be for a

> few

> > weeks!! So why even bother!! They said that MA

> has

> > been denying all claims for children who have not

> made

> > significant progress and in two and a half years

> Ebony

> > had made very little. So She gave me the

> number

> > to MA and said to call and ask them about getting

> her

> > a personal care worker (?). Never heard of this

> > before, but to me it sounds like they are giving

> up on

> > us! I was totally balling my eyes out after that

> > call. :( What does this mean?????? She no

> longer

> > needs someone to teach her skills because it is

> > useless???

> >

> > Thanks for always being there everyone. Please

> > understand if I don't respond to all the posts

> from

> > this last week.....I will try to get through some

> of

> > them tonight and the rest will have to be deleted

>

> >

> > I feel sooooo sad and hopeless.........

> > Tamara

> >

> >

> >

> > =====

> > Tamara

> > mom to :

> > Ebony, 4 yrs -- asd, ADHD, bi-polar

> > , 1 year

> > wife to:

> > Terry, love of my life

> >

> > __________________________________________________

> >

[Guest guest]

Tamara, I'm so sorry this is all happening to you at once. It just doesn't

seem fair that they can do that, without providing something else in place

of it. One thing's not working, they should try another. DAMN!! Sissi was

right in her post, everything sucks today.

HUGS!

ellen

Re: Re: So much going on this week....Argggg!!!!

Thanks Thea! I know it is a money issue. But still

to say that she does not qualify for what money is

available for this is hurtful. I know ABA wasn't very

helpful for Ebony, but it was something at least.

There are not a lot of other programs in the area.

But I will be looking into some other things and I am

also waiting to hear about this personal care worker

business.

Thanks again,

Tamara

--- theaghoss wrote:

> Tamara,

> I know how you feel. The PT, 3 years age, wrote a

> report that she

> felt there was no need to continue with pt because

> he was too

> hyperactive. What a crock. Its probably a money

> issue. Theyre always

> looking to cut corners.MA doesnt know Tamara

> personally, so they

> cant say its useless. Anyways, maybe Ebony needs

> some other type of

> intervention. ABA is only useful for awhile.

> has made a lot of

> progress since being in his new school, where they

> do TEAACH and

> fairly high level academics. I see that Ebony is

> bipolar. is

> going to be evaluated for this due to some noticable

> mood swings.

> Sorry your baby is sick, it seems that these

> infections spread. How

> horrible for everyone.

>

> Take care,

>

> Thea

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> > First, I would like to apolige for ignoring you

> guys

> > the last few days.

> >

> > I had my wisdom teeth out on Tuesday. My

> stepdaughter

> > moved into her first apartment on Wednesday.

> Thursday

> > we moved furniture around and painted and cleaned

> > carpets and put up wall boarders, etc in the kids'

> > room.....we now have an awsome boys'(nascar

> > everything!!) room and ebony's room (barbie, of

> > course!). Very very cute. We have been sharing a

> > room with the baby and now that we got another

> > bedroom, we get our own!!!!!

> > Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

> >

> > Also, I had to take to the doctor

> today....pink

> > eye and an ear infection.....yuck! So I've now

> got a

> > sick boy hanging on me. Go figure.

> >

> > My other bad news is that I finally got a call

> back

> > from the autism project that had been doing

> Ebony's

> > home therapy. Apparently, she will no longer

> qualify

> > for therapy after next month. So, I could choose

> to

> > re-start her program but it would only be for a

> few

> > weeks!! So why even bother!! They said that MA

> has

> > been denying all claims for children who have not

> made

> > significant progress and in two and a half years

> Ebony

> > had made very little. So She gave me the

> number

> > to MA and said to call and ask them about getting

> her

> > a personal care worker (?). Never heard of this

> > before, but to me it sounds like they are giving

> up on

> > us! I was totally balling my eyes out after that

> > call. :( What does this mean?????? She no

> longer

> > needs someone to teach her skills because it is

> > useless???

> >

> > Thanks for always being there everyone. Please

> > understand if I don't respond to all the posts

> from

> > this last week.....I will try to get through some

> of

> > them tonight and the rest will have to be deleted

>

> >

> > I feel sooooo sad and hopeless.........

> > Tamara

> >

> >

> >

> > =====

> > Tamara

> > mom to :

> > Ebony, 4 yrs -- asd, ADHD, bi-polar

> > , 1 year

> > wife to:

> > Terry, love of my life

> >

> > __________________________________________________

> >

[Guest guest]

> > I am truly having a hard time with the fact that she

> is no longer worthy of therapy time, but I am sure in

> time I will feel better. I just know that I need help

> with her. She is soooo hard sometimes. I feel like a

> prisoner in my own home...honestly. >>

Tamara,

We went through a time like this with ...I remember actually

sitting in the psychologist's office and wailing " I'll pay you to

PRETEND to work with him...I just couldn't take it if one more person

gives up on him. " It was an awful time.

Good side is, she didn't plan on giving up; she helped us through the

worst time of our lives. I have some ideas and experiences to share

with you, but time is really tight this morning...it'll probably be

Monday (this last couple of weeks has been insane). Just wanted to

let you know that we have been where you are, and are in a much

better place now...every child with autism CAN learn; it's just a

matter of tickling out what works best for her.

Hang in there...there are other options, I promise. is doing

SO well right now; there was a time when I couldn't even imagine it

anymore.

Raena

[Guest guest]

Thanks ellen. Apparently this personal care

worker is supposed to be the alternative. Which like

I said I am assuming is like a nursing assistant type

person who will help with physical care of ebony. Not

with teaching her anything or trying to make some

progress.

Tamara

--- weinberg@... wrote:

> Tamara, I'm so sorry this is all happening to you at

> once. It just doesn't

> seem fair that they can do that, without providing

> something else in place

> of it. One thing's not working, they should try

> another. DAMN!! Sissi was

> right in her post, everything sucks today.

>

> HUGS!

>

> ellen

>

> Re: Re: So much going on

> this week....Argggg!!!!

>

>

> Thanks Thea! I know it is a money issue. But

> still

> to say that she does not qualify for what money is

> available for this is hurtful. I know ABA wasn't

> very

> helpful for Ebony, but it was something at least.

> There are not a lot of other programs in the area.

> But I will be looking into some other things and I

> am

> also waiting to hear about this personal care

> worker

> business.

> Thanks again,

> Tamara

>

> --- theaghoss wrote:

> > Tamara,

> > I know how you feel. The PT, 3 years age, wrote

> a

> > report that she

> > felt there was no need to continue with pt

> because

> > he was too

> > hyperactive. What a crock. Its probably a money

> > issue. Theyre always

> > looking to cut corners.MA doesnt know Tamara

> > personally, so they

> > cant say its useless. Anyways, maybe Ebony

> needs

> > some other type of

> > intervention. ABA is only useful for awhile.

>

> > has made a lot of

> > progress since being in his new school, where

> they

> > do TEAACH and

> > fairly high level academics. I see that Ebony is

> > bipolar. is

> > going to be evaluated for this due to some

> noticable

> > mood swings.

> > Sorry your baby is sick, it seems that these

> > infections spread. How

> > horrible for everyone.

> >

> > Take care,

> >

> > Thea

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > > First, I would like to apolige for ignoring

> you

> > guys

> > > the last few days.

> > >

> > > I had my wisdom teeth out on Tuesday. My

> > stepdaughter

> > > moved into her first apartment on Wednesday.

> > Thursday

> > > we moved furniture around and painted and

> cleaned

> > > carpets and put up wall boarders, etc in the

> kids'

> > > room.....we now have an awsome boys'(nascar

> > > everything!!) room and ebony's room (barbie,

> of

> > > course!). Very very cute. We have been

> sharing a

> > > room with the baby and now that we got another

> > > bedroom, we get our own!!!!!

> > > Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

> > >

> > > Also, I had to take to the doctor

> > today....pink

> > > eye and an ear infection.....yuck! So I've

> now

> > got a

> > > sick boy hanging on me. Go figure.

> > >

> > > My other bad news is that I finally got a call

> > back

> > > from the autism project that had been doing

> > Ebony's

> > > home therapy. Apparently, she will no longer

> > qualify

> > > for therapy after next month. So, I could

> choose

> > to

> > > re-start her program but it would only be for

> a

> > few

> > > weeks!! So why even bother!! They said that

> MA

> > has

> > > been denying all claims for children who have

> not

> > made

> > > significant progress and in two and a half

> years

> > Ebony

> > > had made very little. So She gave me the

> > number

> > > to MA and said to call and ask them about

> getting

> > her

> > > a personal care worker (?). Never heard of

> this

> > > before, but to me it sounds like they are

> giving

> > up on

> > > us! I was totally balling my eyes out after

> that

> > > call. :( What does this mean?????? She no

> > longer

> > > needs someone to teach her skills because it

> is

> > > useless???

> > >

> > > Thanks for always being there everyone.

> Please

> > > understand if I don't respond to all the posts

> > from

> > > this last week.....I will try to get through

> some

> > of

> > > them tonight and the rest will have to be

> deleted

> >

> > >

> > > I feel sooooo sad and hopeless.........

> > > Tamara

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > =====

> > > Tamara

> > > mom to :

> > > Ebony, 4 yrs -- asd, ADHD, bi-polar

> > > , 1 year

> > > wife to:

> > > Terry, love of my life

> > >

> > >

> __________________________________________________

> > >

[Guest guest]

Jacquie....thanks so much. I know that this is

something I should have been ready for, but for some

reason it hit a lot harder than I thought it would. I

know that everyone has issues with the autism whether

the child is high or low functioning. But the

differences are there. Just as I can't truly know

what it feels like to have a child right on the

verge....wanting to socialize and being unable to do

so. I have different issues than that although I can

certainly sympathize with that situation as people

with higher functioning kids are sympathizing with me.

Thanks Jacquie

Tamara

--- Jacquie wrote:

> Tamara,

> I should have responded yesterday when you wrote

> this. I know how

> you feel. I really do. They kicked Alec out of his

> ABA program for no

> progress. I was ready though. I am sorry that you

> are taking it hard.

> Maybe ABA in home is not what she needs right now. I

> dont know. Maybe

> this in home person can be a form of loose aba. As

> parents we all do

> a sort of aba with our kids whether they are

> autistic or NT. Alec is

> finally making some progress and we are very happy

> about that but he

> is almost the same age a Ebony and we didnt see this

> progress until

> just VERY recently and he still isnt what I would

> call verbal and he

> still isnt potty trained and he still is very, very,

> very autistic

> and is nowhere near ready for mainstreaming. I could

> go on but you

> get ther point. There are alot of HF kids on this

> list. I have one of

> them. But I also have Alec and there are other moms

> with kids who

> are having the problems of a lower fuctioning

> child. Hang in there!

> Jacquie H--- In parenting_autism@y...,

=====

Tamara

mom to :

Ebony, 4 yrs -- asd, ADHD, bi-polar

, 1 year

wife to:

Terry, love of my life

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

She

> broke her bed last week so now we just put the

> mattress right on the floor, but that is better anyway

> cause she likes to jump on her bed and this way if she

> falls she doesn't fall far.

I have thought about doing this with Mark's bed because his favorite

thing to do it pull the mattress half off and make a slide of it.

And for some reason that boy can not leave his sheets on the bed.

Every night they have to be put back on.

Tina W.

[Guest guest]

I think that I was very lucky to be ready to let go of the prgram. I

never expected to hear that rthey didnt want us, only that I didnt

want them! I really do understand about the lower function child as I

have one. The situation is alot different. Not harder just different.

We have alot of the same issues with Alec that you have with Ebony,

but that is probably due to the fact that we bpoth have autistic, BP,

ADHD kids. LOL If you can laugh at that. Hopefully it will all work

out. I basically never stop hoping for Alec to get better but dont

spend to much time thinking about it anymore.Did you know that Alec

is no longer ion school or recieving services? It was our choice, but

a hard one to make.

Jacquie H

> > Tamara,

> > I should have responded yesterday when you wrote

> > this. I know how

> > you feel. I really do. They kicked Alec out of his

> > ABA program for no

> > progress. I was ready though. I am sorry that you

> > are taking it hard.

> > Maybe ABA in home is not what she needs right now. I

> > dont know. Maybe

> > this in home person can be a form of loose aba. As

> > parents we all do

> > a sort of aba with our kids whether they are

> > autistic or NT. Alec is

> > finally making some progress and we are very happy

> > about that but he

> > is almost the same age a Ebony and we didnt see this

> > progress until

> > just VERY recently and he still isnt what I would

> > call verbal and he

> > still isnt potty trained and he still is very, very,

> > very autistic

> > and is nowhere near ready for mainstreaming. I could

> > go on but you

> > get ther point. There are alot of HF kids on this

> > list. I have one of

> > them. But I also have Alec and there are other moms

> > with kids who

> > are having the problems of a lower fuctioning

> > child. Hang in there!

> > Jacquie H--- In parenting_autism@y...,

>

>

> =====

> Tamara

> mom to :

> Ebony, 4 yrs -- asd, ADHD, bi-polar

> , 1 year

> wife to:

> Terry, love of my life

>

> __________________________________________________

>

[Guest guest]

......... They said that MA has

been denying all claims for children who have not made

significant progress and in two and a half years Ebony

had made very little. So She gave me the number

to MA and said to call and ask them about getting her

a personal care worker (?). Never heard of this

before, but to me it sounds like they are giving up on

us! I was totally balling my eyes out after that

call. :( What does this mean?????? She no longer

needs someone to teach her skills because it is

useless???

<<<<<<<<<<<<

Well, this sounds bass-ackwards...

What the hell?

Penny

[Guest guest]

Thanks Penny! That's kinda what it sounds like to me

too.

:-(

Tamara

--- Penny wrote:

>

> ........ They said that MA has

> been denying all claims for children who have not

> made

> significant progress and in two and a half years

> Ebony

> had made very little. So She gave me the number

> to MA and said to call and ask them about getting

> her

> a personal care worker (?). Never heard of this

> before, but to me it sounds like they are giving up

> on

> us! I was totally balling my eyes out after that

> call. :( What does this mean?????? She no

> longer

> needs someone to teach her skills because it is

> useless???

> <<<<<<<<<<<<

>

> Well, this sounds bass-ackwards...

>

> What the hell?

>

> Penny

>

=====

Tamara

mom to :

Ebony, 4 yrs -- asd, ADHD, bi-polar

, 1 year

wife to:

Terry, love of my life

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Thanks Karin, that came over very well actually...:-)

I'm not really sure if I feel better about it or not,

but I am not concentrating on it as much today. So

that is good.

Thanks so much for your concern and support. I really

appreciate it.

Tamara

--- Karin wrote:

> Tamara,

>

> I hope you are feeling better today. I'm so sorry

> that you are feeling

> so sad right now. I'm glad you write in when you

> can.

>

> If it's difficult to hear about " higher functioning

> kids " I imagine that

> you might feel the way we all do when we notice the

> differences in

> comparing our kids with NT kids. It is painful but

> we do understand and

> support you. I have learned so much in the past two

> months about the

> difficulties people face in their lives and have

> *really* learned not to

> " judge a book by it's cover " and any person I see

> with a difficult child

> now I just want to run up and hug them. I'm

> starting to really notice

> and try to communicate with people with all kinds of

> disabilities now.

> I always thought of myself as a tolerant, accepting

> person, but never as

> much as I feel now.

>

> We have to be so strong in our daily lives that

> there needs to be

> somewhere a person can go and cry " Why Me? " Some of

> us on this list

> have so much to deal with that I'm just in awe that

> people can be so

> tough and keep on going when it just seems too hard.

>

> FWIW, I'm thinking of you today with much concern

> and admiration. Never

> give up on Ebony making progress. You just never

> know what she may be

> able to do in her life. You never know what

> treatments might be just

> around the corner, the human brain is an incredible

> thing, don't sell it

> short. The human heart is even more incredible and

> you are stronger

> than you think. I hope this comes across as

> somewhat encouraging

> because that is the intent, but my poor

> communication skills coupled

> with e-mail leave me at a disadvantage in conveying

> what I really want

> to say.

>

> Sincerely ~ Karin

> Mom to Jake 3, ASD

>

> tamara laskowski wrote:

>

> > Thanks Sue. I just can't help feeling that they

> no

> > longer feel that she is " worth " therapy money.

> The

> > personal care worker is probably similar to

> respite.

> > I will definetely look into it because right now I

> get

> > no respite at all. But that doesn't change the

> fact

> > that, even if it is the state saying so, they no

> > longer think that Ebony will " recover " . I

> don't

> > know if even most of the people on this list could

> > know what that feels like. There are so many high

> > functioning kids here (don't get me wrong...that

> is a

> > good thing :-) absolutely!! ) I just feel in the

> > minority sometimes with the " lower functioning

> child " .

> > I will let you all know what the personal care

> thing

> > is. I just hope it is some help of some kind. I

> > really don't know if I can do this forever. Did I

> > tell you guys we had to board up her windows cause

> she

> > was breaking them and also got them open and got

> out.

> > She now has pink boards over her windows to go

> with

> > Barbie and no windows.

> > Anyway, done with my pity party now. Thanks so

> much

> > for the support Sue. I really do appreciate it.

> >

> > Tamara

> >

> >

> > --- wrote:

> > > Tamara,

> > > Try not to look at it as them giving up on her.

> It

> > > sounds more like the

> > > state trying to save money! I'd go ahead and

> look

> > > into the personal care

> > > worker she mentioned and see what it's all

> about.

> > > Good luck.

> > > I hope feels better soon!

> > > sue

> > >

> > >

> >

> >

> > =====

> > Tamara

> > mom to :

> > Ebony, 4 yrs -- asd, ADHD, bi-polar

> > , 1 year

> > wife to:

> > Terry, love of my life

> >

> > __________________________________________________

> > Do you Yahoo!?

> > HotJobs - Search new jobs daily now

> > http://hotjobs.yahoo.com/

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Jacquie, I didn't no Alec wasn't in school anymore!

What are you doing with him? I really do love Ebony

to death but I could not wait for summer to end. I

needed the couple of hours of break if only for my own

sanity.

Tamara

--- Jacquie wrote:

> I think that I was very lucky to be ready to let go

> of the prgram. I

> never expected to hear that rthey didnt want us,

> only that I didnt

> want them! I really do understand about the lower

> function child as I

> have one. The situation is alot different. Not

> harder just different.

> We have alot of the same issues with Alec that you

> have with Ebony,

> but that is probably due to the fact that we bpoth

> have autistic, BP,

> ADHD kids. LOL If you can laugh at that. Hopefully

> it will all work

> out. I basically never stop hoping for Alec to get

> better but dont

> spend to much time thinking about it anymore.Did you

> know that Alec

> is no longer ion school or recieving services? It

> was our choice, but

> a hard one to make.

> Jacquie H

>

>

>

> > > Tamara,

> > > I should have responded yesterday when you

> wrote

> > > this. I know how

> > > you feel. I really do. They kicked Alec out of

> his

> > > ABA program for no

> > > progress. I was ready though. I am sorry that

> you

> > > are taking it hard.

> > > Maybe ABA in home is not what she needs right

> now. I

> > > dont know. Maybe

> > > this in home person can be a form of loose aba.

> As

> > > parents we all do

> > > a sort of aba with our kids whether they are

> > > autistic or NT. Alec is

> > > finally making some progress and we are very

> happy

> > > about that but he

> > > is almost the same age a Ebony and we didnt see

> this

> > > progress until

> > > just VERY recently and he still isnt what I

> would

> > > call verbal and he

> > > still isnt potty trained and he still is very,

> very,

> > > very autistic

> > > and is nowhere near ready for mainstreaming. I

> could

> > > go on but you

> > > get ther point. There are alot of HF kids on

> this

> > > list. I have one of

> > > them. But I also have Alec and there are other

> moms

> > > with kids who

> > > are having the problems of a lower fuctioning

> > > child. Hang in there!

> > > Jacquie H--- In

> parenting_autism@y...,

> >

> >

> > =====

> > Tamara

> > mom to :

> > Ebony, 4 yrs -- asd, ADHD, bi-polar

> > , 1 year

> > wife to:

> > Terry, love of my life

> >

> > __________________________________________________

> >

[Guest guest]

Tamara, how awful. I wish I could say something useful.

Hope things get better soon hon

Tuna

>>>>>>>>>>

Did I tell you guys we had to board up her windows cause she was breaking them

and also got them open and got out.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Get more from the Web. FREE MSN Explorer

download : http://explorer.msn.com

[Guest guest]

-Tamara,

They probably find any reason to cut down on services. I know its

hard to not to take personally, but, they are beaurocrats (sp) and

they may have a way of measuring what they see as progress that isnt

even accurate. They may use a check-off sheet with stuff that is

very broad. I was trying to be good about my feelings about the ABA

issue. Once again, I believe it has its limits with any child. In

addition, its not the end all be all therapy. It is the most

researched, there has been a big push to make it the standard

treatment for autism, and when a kid " doesnt make enough progress "

it means they wont.My son had about 21/2 years doing more or less

strict ABA and progressed more in the past 2 months with TEEACH and

a sensitive teacher. I have heard plenty of stories of kids who did

better when they switched over to TEEACH method. Some kids need more

auditory integration therapy. I went to a presentation given by

erics school, and many parents had done it with great success with

this and fast for word, which is for older kids.

I read Jacquies post about Alec making progress now, and didnt in

the beginning. I think that is part of the autism too, some kids

seem to develop in leaps and then stagnate (plateau).

Thea

-- In parenting_autism@y..., tamara laskowski <tamara_b73@y...>

wrote:

> Thanks Thea! I know it is a money issue. But still

> to say that she does not qualify for what money is

> available for this is hurtful. I know ABA wasn't very

> helpful for Ebony, but it was something at least.

> There are not a lot of other programs in the area.

> But I will be looking into some other things and I am

> also waiting to hear about this personal care worker

> business.

> Thanks again,

> Tamara

>

> --- theaghoss <h.hozainz@v...> wrote:

> > Tamara,

> > I know how you feel. The PT, 3 years age, wrote a

> > report that she

> > felt there was no need to continue with pt because

> > he was too

> > hyperactive. What a crock. Its probably a money

> > issue. Theyre always

> > looking to cut corners.MA doesnt know Tamara

> > personally, so they

> > cant say its useless. Anyways, maybe Ebony needs

> > some other type of

> > intervention. ABA is only useful for awhile.

> > has made a lot of

> > progress since being in his new school, where they

> > do TEAACH and

> > fairly high level academics. I see that Ebony is

> > bipolar. is

> > going to be evaluated for this due to some noticable

> > mood swings.

> > Sorry your baby is sick, it seems that these

> > infections spread. How

> > horrible for everyone.

> >

> > Take care,

> >

> > Thea

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > > First, I would like to apolige for ignoring you

> > guys

> > > the last few days.

> > >

> > > I had my wisdom teeth out on Tuesday. My

> > stepdaughter

> > > moved into her first apartment on Wednesday.

> > Thursday

> > > we moved furniture around and painted and cleaned

> > > carpets and put up wall boarders, etc in the kids'

> > > room.....we now have an awsome boys'(nascar

> > > everything!!) room and ebony's room (barbie, of

> > > course!). Very very cute. We have been sharing a

> > > room with the baby and now that we got another

> > > bedroom, we get our own!!!!!

> > > Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

> > >

> > > Also, I had to take to the doctor

> > today....pink

> > > eye and an ear infection.....yuck! So I've now

> > got a

> > > sick boy hanging on me. Go figure.

> > >

> > > My other bad news is that I finally got a call

> > back

> > > from the autism project that had been doing

> > Ebony's

> > > home therapy. Apparently, she will no longer

> > qualify

> > > for therapy after next month. So, I could choose

> > to

> > > re-start her program but it would only be for a

> > few

> > > weeks!! So why even bother!! They said that MA

> > has

> > > been denying all claims for children who have not

> > made

> > > significant progress and in two and a half years

> > Ebony

> > > had made very little. So She gave me the

> > number

> > > to MA and said to call and ask them about getting

> > her

> > > a personal care worker (?). Never heard of this

> > > before, but to me it sounds like they are giving

> > up on

> > > us! I was totally balling my eyes out after that

> > > call. :( What does this mean?????? She no

> > longer

> > > needs someone to teach her skills because it is

> > > useless???

> > >

> > > Thanks for always being there everyone. Please

> > > understand if I don't respond to all the posts

> > from

> > > this last week.....I will try to get through some

> > of

> > > them tonight and the rest will have to be deleted

> >

> > >

> > > I feel sooooo sad and hopeless.........

> > > Tamara

> > >

> > >

> > >

> > > =====

> > > Tamara

> > > mom to :

> > > Ebony, 4 yrs -- asd, ADHD, bi-polar

> > > , 1 year

> > > wife to:

> > > Terry, love of my life

> > >

> > > __________________________________________________

> > >

[Guest guest]

LOL!!!!! I have no doubt that you love Ebony! I know all about

needing a break too. But that never means we dont love them. But you

know that. Really he is just at home with me. I play it by ear

everyday and have no formal setup for learning. I felt his behaviours

in public and at home were getting out of hand and the school wasnt

getting a ahandle on potty training. Alec has started some basic

requests for juice and toys(only a couple) and repeating so I thought

that being in a nonverbal class and 4 hours on a bus everyday wasnt

qworth it. So he is ghome with me and Yessenia all day. We go out

shopping(OMG!) and we run errands and we go outside in the yard and

play together. He wont sit still for books and such and I dont push

him to hard. I am going to start taking him to tap class this

upcoming weekend. It should be a riot! I of course will be shadowing

and prompting him through it all.I do have my mom to help once a week

with watching the boys. She takes them with my dad and they all go to

the park or movies opr something like that. It is nice to get a

chance to clean. That is if miss yessenia lets me.

Jacquie H

> > > > Tamara,

> > > > I should have responded yesterday when you

> > wrote

> > > > this. I know how

> > > > you feel. I really do. They kicked Alec out of

> > his

> > > > ABA program for no

> > > > progress. I was ready though. I am sorry that

> > you

> > > > are taking it hard.

> > > > Maybe ABA in home is not what she needs right

> > now. I

> > > > dont know. Maybe

> > > > this in home person can be a form of loose aba.

> > As

> > > > parents we all do

> > > > a sort of aba with our kids whether they are

> > > > autistic or NT. Alec is

> > > > finally making some progress and we are very

> > happy

> > > > about that but he

> > > > is almost the same age a Ebony and we didnt see

> > this

> > > > progress until

> > > > just VERY recently and he still isnt what I

> > would

> > > > call verbal and he

> > > > still isnt potty trained and he still is very,

> > very,

> > > > very autistic

> > > > and is nowhere near ready for mainstreaming. I

> > could

> > > > go on but you

> > > > get ther point. There are alot of HF kids on

> > this

> > > > list. I have one of

> > > > them. But I also have Alec and there are other

> > moms

> > > > with kids who

> > > > are having the problems of a lower fuctioning

> > > > child. Hang in there!

> > > > Jacquie H--- In

> > parenting_autism@y...,

> > >

> > >

> > > =====

> > > Tamara

> > > mom to :

> > > Ebony, 4 yrs -- asd, ADHD, bi-polar

> > > , 1 year

> > > wife to:

> > > Terry, love of my life

> > >

> > > __________________________________________________

> > >

[Guest guest]

Oh Tamara, that is great news the your dh can adopt Ebony. I only

hope that someday I will have the same luck!

Tina W.

[Guest guest]

> me. Oh, I don't think I told everyone our good news

> though. I finally talked to Ebony's natural dad and

> he has agreed to let my dh adopt her. I basically put

> it to him like this.....Ebony doesn't know you, she

> knows Terry. That is her daddy. If something were to

> happen to me, I think he would be best able to care

> for her.

Oh, Congratulations Tamara!!!!!!! That is WONDERFUL news. :-D

Jacquie

[Guest guest]

>>>>>>>>>>>>>

I finally talked to Ebony's natural dad and he has agreed to let my dh adopt

her.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Congratulations Tamara!!

Tuna

*******************************************Get more from the Web. FREE MSN

Explorer download : http://explorer.msn.com

[Guest guest]

Congratulations on bio dad agreeing to let Terry adopt Ebony! This is

fantastic!!

Sue

-----

[Guest guest]

Tamara,

I don't know your personnal feelings on medication, but have you thought

about trying it for Ebony if she isn't already on them?

Sue

[Guest guest]

You may want to give some thought to tearing out her carpeting and putting

in something vinyl so it's easier to clean. You can always put down throw

rugs that you can wash in the machine.

I'm so sorry the state seems to have made this decision. Is there any way

you can appeal? Are there other services she can qualify for?

Big hugs being sent your way.

Sue

[Guest guest]

>>>>>>>>>>>

You may want to give some thought to tearing out her carpeting and putting

in something vinyl so it's easier to clean. You can always put down throw

rugs that you can wash in the machine.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

We did that in 's room. Got rid of the juice and dirt encrusted carpet

and put down clean washable vinyl tiles. Then we got him a non-slip throw rug.

So easy.

Are you going to find other services for Ebony? Some sort of home-schooling

maybe?

Hang in there hon

Tuna

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