Guest guest Posted July 21, 2003 Report Share Posted July 21, 2003 I understand your feelings Lynn, because I felt the same way. People told me the exact same horror stories. Because I am a nurse, I was able to take comfort in the realization that this surgery is no more risky than any other major surgery. If there is an increased risk it is only due to the fact that it is sometimes done on people who are terribly unhealthy and super obese. You are young and your BMI isnt that high compared to many other people who have the surgery - mine was 46.2 and I was considered low risk for complications. In the end I decided to have the surgery because I knew the chances of me losing the weight on my own were slim to none. I also couldnt live the rest of my life wondering what if. No one can make this decision for you and no one should try to talk you into it or out of it. Its all up to you. You have to decide if the chance of serious complications from the surgery outweighs the chance of complications caused by your obesity. Personally, I decided that the chances of a major complication from the surgery were slim, but the chances of major complications from my obesity were huge - plus not only was my life time being limited by my weight, so was my quality of life. Thats what decided it for me - whatever helps you decide whether or not to have it is all up to you. We will be here for you though - you arent alone ~ami~ LAP RNY 5-13-03 261/226/?? In a message dated 7/21/2003 9:30:49 PM Central Standard Time, emerald_eyes_1971@... writes: > Hi everyone I just found this site and it seems to have alot of > info. on it. I am going to speak to my surgeon tomorrow (Tuesday > 22) and I am about to back out. I have heard so many horror > stories. I hate I ever told anyone about wanting this done. My > daughter (10 yrs.) has heard family memembers telling me about some > scary things you know like I know someone who's brother's wife's > sister's friend etc...you understand what I mean...well how did > anyone who had this surgery done get thru all that I am totally > scared to death! I am 31 (32 in August) BMI of 43. My surgeon does > the open RNY. Any advice out there? Thanks, > Lynn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 21, 2003 Report Share Posted July 21, 2003 Hi everyone I just found this site and it seems to have alot of info. on it. I am going to speak to my surgeon tomorrow (Tuesday 22) and I am about to back out. I have heard so many horror stories. I hate I ever told anyone about wanting this done. My daughter (10 yrs.) has heard family memembers telling me about some scary things you know like I know someone who's brother's wife's sister's friend etc...you understand what I mean...well how did anyone who had this surgery done get thru all that I am totally scared to death! I am 31 (32 in August) BMI of 43. My surgeon does the open RNY. Any advice out there? Thanks, Lynn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 21, 2003 Report Share Posted July 21, 2003 Lynn-I had the surgery one week ago today. I feel WONDERFUL. I too had heard all the horror stories. Somebody always know SOMEBODY that has had it done and they died or almost died. I decided that this was a chance I had to take. My parents didn't even support me, but my husband has been awesome. I am still going through the post-op ups and downs of major surgery, but so far, no regrets. Yes, it hurt, it's surgery, but I am here to be a witness that I haven't even sprung that deadly leak everybody gets. Good luck and make the decision for yourself and no one else! Tammy > Hi everyone I just found this site and it seems to have alot of > info. on it. I am going to speak to my surgeon tomorrow (Tuesday > 22) and I am about to back out. I have heard so many horror > stories. I hate I ever told anyone about wanting this done. My > daughter (10 yrs.) has heard family memembers telling me about some > scary things you know like I know someone who's brother's wife's > sister's friend etc...you understand what I mean...well how did > anyone who had this surgery done get thru all that I am totally > scared to death! I am 31 (32 in August) BMI of 43. My surgeon does > the open RNY. Any advice out there? Thanks, > Lynn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 22, 2003 Report Share Posted July 22, 2003 Lynn, I think everyone knows someone that has a horror story..but we are all not having problems. Someone of us are doing great and loving life again, and for some loving it for the first time in their lives! You have come so far in just wanting the surgery! Dont give up now, we are here as a family to help you. Pamela 11/19/02 120 lbs gone!! Miami > Hi everyone I just found this site and it seems to have alot of > info. on it. I am going to speak to my surgeon tomorrow (Tuesday > 22) and I am about to back out. I have heard so many horror > stories. I hate I ever told anyone about wanting this done. My > daughter (10 yrs.) has heard family memembers telling me about some > scary things you know like I know someone who's brother's wife's > sister's friend etc...you understand what I mean...well how did > anyone who had this surgery done get thru all that I am totally > scared to death! I am 31 (32 in August) BMI of 43. My surgeon does > the open RNY. Any advice out there? Thanks, > Lynn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 22, 2003 Report Share Posted July 22, 2003 Hi Lynn I am pre-op too and I am 5'3 and 275 pounds and my BMI is 50 and I am having the Lap RNY on 8/25/03 and I avoided the whole horror story junk by not telling any of my family members about my surgery. I have only told my daughter who is 14 and my boss at work about it. I avoid the unnecessary crap of having to listen to other people's opinions on what I should or should not do to my body. I had mentioned WLS 3 years ago to my Mom and she told me oh Lori Anne don't do that it is so drastic just stop eating and work out. Well, last year she died of diabetes complications and she always had a weight problem. I am settled on the fact that yes I am having the surgery done because within my family alone there is just about every detrimental disease that can take your life and I am going to do everything I can to keep from developing those diseases. I know that my weight is the number one thing that pushes me closer and closer to those diseases so I thank God that this surgery was created and that I qualify for it. I intend on doing whatever it takes after surgery to ensure that I lose weight and that I maintain the weightloss there really is no alternative for me. Just pray on it and do what you are lead to do. I am going to be 35 years old this August and I intend to regain my life back because I really miss roller-skating and bike riding and running and horseplaying and being spontaneous with my loved ones. Good luck in whatever you decide. Lori Anne pre-op Lap RNY 8/25/03 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 23, 2003 Report Share Posted July 23, 2003 Charlotte, This is a decision you have to make by yourself and for yourself. I posted a weeek ago, " Why did I do this to myself??? " because I had just gotten out of surgery and come home. I was sick of jello and chicken broth. Today I started my protein shakes and food. I feel 100% better. I had Lap RNY and did awesome. Not ONE single complication. I credit this to my deep faith in God. I am also only 33 years old. Good luck with your decision, I am very glad I chose to do this. Best of luck ! Tammy 7/14/03 LAP RNY Lost to date 23 lbs > Hey guys. I'm waiting for my first visit with my surgeon (Aug. 15), and I > am getting so nervous about this whole procedure. I have been reading this > egroup for several weeks now trying to get a grasp on what it will be like > just after the surgery, several months after surgery, and years after too. > I saw a couple posts where the person said that they were about to back out > of the whole thing. I bounce back and forth. One day I think that I will > do it, and the next day I'm thinking of calling and canceling the > appointment. > > > > I read about people throwing up every day for months, about not losing > anything for weeks at a time, about having to be obsessed with counting > protein and ounces of water EVERY day, about the inevitable hair loss-- > when this happens, my family and friends will probably shake their fingers > at me and say `I told you so!'. About never being able to taste a > Hershey's chocolate bar again? I can deal with a few days of pain and > discomfort (if it isn't too very bad). But will the rest of it be an > OBSESSION that takes up my waking hours, that I have to figure and plan > each day? Will I just live on protein the rest of my life, very little > vegetables, and give up most all fruit? Will protein shakes be an every > day MUST for the rest of my life also? > > > > I wrote a letter similar to this one a week or so ago, when I was in > another " doom and despair " pit, and got very nice responses that lifted me > up --- for a while. I know that no one can make this decision for me. My > husband is for me 110 percent. He is just great. But I'm a worrier. > There have been so many posts (maybe because I dwell on them) that say, > " Why did I do this to myself?!!! " I don't want to be sorry later. This > isn't just a little diet that I am going to try for a few months til I get > tired of it or til I reach my goal. This is for the rest of my life. And > there is no going back once it is done. > > > > I am 55 years old, 5' 6 " and weigh 263. People tell me that I don't look > like I weigh that much (is this a compliment???), but I am tired of being > uncomfortable. Each day I take 3 hypertension meds, a thyroid pill, a > cholesterol pill, an acid reflux pill, occasional Advil for pain in my > knees and feet. I can't walk very far without getting tired. I've been on > numerous diets the last several years and have lost and regained the same > dadgum 30-40 pounds over and over again. I'm sure this sounds very similar > to most everyone on this list. > > > > I read and read but I just get scared-determined-scared-determined- etc. As > I read back over this letter, it sounds so depressing. Sorry. But I just > don't know what to do. Most of you say that you would do it all over `in a > heartbeat'. I pray for wisdom and guidance. I don't know, maybe I just > haven't researched long enough. > > > > Thanks guys, > > Charlotte > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 23, 2003 Report Share Posted July 23, 2003 Thanks Tammy for such a quick reply. Charlotte Pre-op (tomistic and pessimistic all at the same time!) Re: Worried about the surgery Charlotte, This is a decision you have to make by yourself and for yourself. I posted a weeek ago, " Why did I do this to myself??? " because I had just gotten out of surgery and come home. I was sick of jello and chicken broth. Today I started my protein shakes and food. I feel 100% better. I had Lap RNY and did awesome. Not ONE single complication. I credit this to my deep faith in God. I am also only 33 years old. Good luck with your decision, I am very glad I chose to do this. Best of luck ! Tammy 7/14/03 LAP RNY Lost to date 23 lbs > Hey guys. I'm waiting for my first visit with my surgeon (Aug. 15), and I > am getting so nervous about this whole procedure. I have been reading this > egroup for several weeks now trying to get a grasp on what it will be like > just after the surgery, several months after surgery, and years after too. > I saw a couple posts where the person said that they were about to back out > of the whole thing. I bounce back and forth. One day I think that I will > do it, and the next day I'm thinking of calling and canceling the > appointment. > > > > I read about people throwing up every day for months, about not losing > anything for weeks at a time, about having to be obsessed with counting > protein and ounces of water EVERY day, about the inevitable hair loss-- > when this happens, my family and friends will probably shake their fingers > at me and say `I told you so!'. About never being able to taste a > Hershey's chocolate bar again? I can deal with a few days of pain and > discomfort (if it isn't too very bad). But will the rest of it be an > OBSESSION that takes up my waking hours, that I have to figure and plan > each day? Will I just live on protein the rest of my life, very little > vegetables, and give up most all fruit? Will protein shakes be an every > day MUST for the rest of my life also? > > > > I wrote a letter similar to this one a week or so ago, when I was in > another " doom and despair " pit, and got very nice responses that lifted me > up --- for a while. I know that no one can make this decision for me. My > husband is for me 110 percent. He is just great. But I'm a worrier. > There have been so many posts (maybe because I dwell on them) that say, > " Why did I do this to myself?!!! " I don't want to be sorry later. This > isn't just a little diet that I am going to try for a few months til I get > tired of it or til I reach my goal. This is for the rest of my life. And > there is no going back once it is done. > > > > I am 55 years old, 5' 6 " and weigh 263. People tell me that I don't look > like I weigh that much (is this a compliment???), but I am tired of being > uncomfortable. Each day I take 3 hypertension meds, a thyroid pill, a > cholesterol pill, an acid reflux pill, occasional Advil for pain in my > knees and feet. I can't walk very far without getting tired. I've been on > numerous diets the last several years and have lost and regained the same > dadgum 30-40 pounds over and over again. I'm sure this sounds very similar > to most everyone on this list. > > > > I read and read but I just get scared-determined-scared-determined- etc. As > I read back over this letter, it sounds so depressing. Sorry. But I just > don't know what to do. Most of you say that you would do it all over `in a > heartbeat'. I pray for wisdom and guidance. I don't know, maybe I just > haven't researched long enough. > > > > Thanks guys, > > Charlotte > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 24, 2003 Report Share Posted July 24, 2003 Charlotte, First let me tell you that I love your name. My husband.. now ex.. that is another long story..lol but he always hoped we would have a daughter and wanted to name her Charlotte! I am pre-op also. My surgery is next friday. I too have moments of doubt, thinking why am I doing this to myself, why dont I just try one more diet. I am nervous about the upset stomach, not being able to eat more than 1/2 a cup at a time etc. Then I think about my sons, 14, 11 and 8 and all the grandchildren I will have one day. What am i going to be able to do with them? What about a trip to an amusment park and grandma has to keep sitting down, or having to ride in a scooter. That is something I dont want to live with!!! I want to be swimming with them when I am 80, and this surgery is my chance at that. I know I will not have chocolate anymore, but for me, I dont care. My life and LIFESTYLE are more important to me than food anymore. I can get my chocolate fix with my protien shake. I have moments of fear and crying and I come here for comfort and support. This is the place to let those fears out. These people are here for us, thru the thick and the thin.. You dont need to say sorry for your emotions, you get them out and deal with them. Many of us are in the position we are in because we refused to deal with our feelings. This is not healthy and I commend you for having the strength to lean the people here and share your darkest moments and ask for help. Bottom line, we have to give up our past lifestyle that got us here in the first place. We are giving up alot, going to go thru alot, entering unknown territory etc. That is why I feel we are the strong, brave, wonderful people that we are! We are looking a problem in the face and figuring out a way to fix it. So give yourself a break and feel what you are feeling. I dont know if you are religious, but I truly believe God is the one to turn to also. He will let you know if you are on the right path, not to say you wont have moments of doubt, fear, etc. You dont have to make any decisions right now. Keep going thru the process, keep reading, keep asking. If you want to try and diet one more time, do so. Whatever decision you make, it will be what is right for " YOU " This is about you and what your want out of your life. Best of luck! We support you! Lori Dr. Nizzi 8/1/03 Northern Michigan > Hey guys. I'm waiting for my first visit with my surgeon (Aug. 15), and I > am getting so nervous about this whole procedure. I have been reading this > egroup for several weeks now trying to get a grasp on what it will be like > just after the surgery, several months after surgery, and years after too. > I saw a couple posts where the person said that they were about to back out > of the whole thing. I bounce back and forth. One day I think that I will > do it, and the next day I'm thinking of calling and canceling the > appointment. > > > > I read about people throwing up every day for months, about not losing > anything for weeks at a time, about having to be obsessed with counting > protein and ounces of water EVERY day, about the inevitable hair loss-- > when this happens, my family and friends will probably shake their fingers > at me and say `I told you so!'. About never being able to taste a > Hershey's chocolate bar again? I can deal with a few days of pain and > discomfort (if it isn't too very bad). But will the rest of it be an > OBSESSION that takes up my waking hours, that I have to figure and plan > each day? Will I just live on protein the rest of my life, very little > vegetables, and give up most all fruit? Will protein shakes be an every > day MUST for the rest of my life also? > > > > I wrote a letter similar to this one a week or so ago, when I was in > another " doom and despair " pit, and got very nice responses that lifted me > up --- for a while. I know that no one can make this decision for me. My > husband is for me 110 percent. He is just great. But I'm a worrier. > There have been so many posts (maybe because I dwell on them) that say, > " Why did I do this to myself?!!! " I don't want to be sorry later. This > isn't just a little diet that I am going to try for a few months til I get > tired of it or til I reach my goal. This is for the rest of my life. And > there is no going back once it is done. > > > > I am 55 years old, 5' 6 " and weigh 263. People tell me that I don't look > like I weigh that much (is this a compliment???), but I am tired of being > uncomfortable. Each day I take 3 hypertension meds, a thyroid pill, a > cholesterol pill, an acid reflux pill, occasional Advil for pain in my > knees and feet. I can't walk very far without getting tired. I've been on > numerous diets the last several years and have lost and regained the same > dadgum 30-40 pounds over and over again. I'm sure this sounds very similar > to most everyone on this list. > > > > I read and read but I just get scared-determined-scared-determined- etc. As > I read back over this letter, it sounds so depressing. Sorry. But I just > don't know what to do. Most of you say that you would do it all over `in a > heartbeat'. I pray for wisdom and guidance. I don't know, maybe I just > haven't researched long enough. > > > > Thanks guys, > > Charlotte > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 24, 2003 Report Share Posted July 24, 2003 You’re so right Lori. Guess I’m just trying to hold on to the “other” lifestyle while making plans for the new me. And that just won’t work. My mind and body are already going through a grieving process of what it is going to have to give up. I can get through this with the grace of God. Everyone on this list has had such kind support for me and for other people’s problems too. Thanks. Charlotte Pre-op (tomistic) Re: Worried about the surgery Charlotte, First let me tell you that I love your name. My husband.. now ex.. that is another long story..lol but he always hoped we would have a daughter and wanted to name her Charlotte! I am pre-op also. My surgery is next friday. I too have moments of doubt, thinking why am I doing this to myself, why dont I just try one more diet. I am nervous about the upset stomach, not being able to eat more than 1/2 a cup at a time etc. Then I think about my sons, 14, 11 and 8 and all the grandchildren I will have one day. What am i going to be able to do with them? What about a trip to an amusment park and grandma has to keep sitting down, or having to ride in a scooter. That is something I dont want to live with!!! I want to be swimming with them when I am 80, and this surgery is my chance at that. I know I will not have chocolate anymore, but for me, I dont care. My life and LIFESTYLE are more important to me than food anymore. I can get my chocolate fix with my protien shake. I have moments of fear and crying and I come here for comfort and support. This is the place to let those fears out. These people are here for us, thru the thick and the thin.. You dont need to say sorry for your emotions, you get them out and deal with them. Many of us are in the position we are in because we refused to deal with our feelings. This is not healthy and I commend you for having the strength to lean the people here and share your darkest moments and ask for help. Bottom line, we have to give up our past lifestyle that got us here in the first place. We are giving up alot, going to go thru alot, entering unknown territory etc. That is why I feel we are the strong, brave, wonderful people that we are! We are looking a problem in the face and figuring out a way to fix it. So give yourself a break and feel what you are feeling. I dont know if you are religious, but I truly believe God is the one to turn to also. He will let you know if you are on the right path, not to say you wont have moments of doubt, fear, etc. You dont have to make any decisions right now. Keep going thru the process, keep reading, keep asking. If you want to try and diet one more time, do so. Whatever decision you make, it will be what is right for " YOU " This is about you and what your want out of your life. Best of luck! We support you! Lori Dr. Nizzi 8/1/03 Northern Michigan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 24, 2003 Report Share Posted July 24, 2003 You will do wonderful. I completely understand and it could be me tomorrow that needs the pick me up...lol I try to focus on the positive and not think about the negative. We will deal with that when it comes. Glad you are feeling better! Lori Northern Michigan > You're so right Lori. Guess I'm just trying to hold on to the " other " > lifestyle while making plans for the new me. And that just won't work. My > mind and body are already going through a grieving process of what it is > going to have to give up. I can get through this with the grace of God. > Everyone on this list has had such kind support for me and for other > people's problems too. Thanks. > > Charlotte > > Pre-op (tomistic) > > > > Re: Worried about the surgery > > > > Charlotte, > > First let me tell you that I love your name. My husband.. now ex.. > that is another long story..lol but he always hoped we would have a > daughter and wanted to name her Charlotte! > > I am pre-op also. My surgery is next friday. I too have moments of > doubt, thinking why am I doing this to myself, why dont I just try > one more diet. I am nervous about the upset stomach, not being able > to eat more than 1/2 a cup at a time etc. > > Then I think about my sons, 14, 11 and 8 and all the grandchildren I > will have one day. What am i going to be able to do with them? > What about a trip to an amusment park and grandma has to keep > sitting down, or having to ride in a scooter. That is something I > dont want to live with!!! I want to be swimming with them when I am > 80, and this surgery is my chance at that. > > I know I will not have chocolate anymore, but for me, I dont care. > My life and LIFESTYLE are more important to me than food anymore. I > can get my chocolate fix with my protien shake. > > I have moments of fear and crying and I come here for comfort and > support. This is the place to let those fears out. These people are > here for us, thru the thick and the thin.. > > You dont need to say sorry for your emotions, you get them out and > deal with them. Many of us are in the position we are in because we > refused to deal with our feelings. This is not healthy and I > commend you for having the strength to lean the people here and > share your darkest moments and ask for help. > > Bottom line, we have to give up our past lifestyle that got us here > in the first place. We are giving up alot, going to go thru alot, > entering unknown territory etc. That is why I feel we are the > strong, brave, wonderful people that we are! We are looking a > problem in the face and figuring out a way to fix it. So give > yourself a break and feel what you are feeling. > > I dont know if you are religious, but I truly believe God is the one > to turn to also. He will let you know if you are on the right path, > not to say you wont have moments of doubt, fear, etc. > > You dont have to make any decisions right now. Keep going thru the > process, keep reading, keep asking. If you want to try and diet one > more time, do so. Whatever decision you make, it will be what is > right for " YOU " This is about you and what your want out of your > life. > > Best of luck! We support you! > > Lori > Dr. Nizzi 8/1/03 > Northern Michigan > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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