why does this bother me ????

[Guest guest]

I battle with this as well.

I've been setting boundaries with my nada, and they have only resulted

in abuse. The more I hear from her about what a terrible person I am,

the more I feel like I need to enforce them. While I haven't gone NC w/

her, she is twisting things around to other family members and acting

like I have.

Two weeks ago I emailed her, to let her know how we are doing and 'check

in' on her. She has heart problems (for which she says I am to blame)

and I do worry that something will happen to her. My husband and I are

unable to conceive naturally, so we are doing in-vitro fertilization.

This is our second round, we did one in June that resulted in an early

miscarraige. (Which, of course, nada decided to have a 'you don't love

me' meltdown. I guess I was too bust grieving to be an adequate

daughter, haha) I told herthat we were doing IVF again and that I was

going into the hospital that morning to have the egg retrieval procedure.

No answer. That was last Monday.

I know I should be grateful that she is not hurling insults, or even

worse, lovey dovey emails that serve only to rope me in and then control

me. I know I should be grateful. And, in a way I am.

And in a way it just reminds me how much I really wish she could just be

a mother.

But she never will.