RE: Update & I am a freak.

December 1, 2000

,

You are not a freak, and said it yourself sweetie! YOU are enjoying YOU

again, and feeling damn good about it! There's nothing wrong with being

confident, self assured, HIGH on life, yadda yadda yadda, as long as you

know when too much is a problem. You said you're very committed to your

husband, and that's what it's all about. You're being nice, and feeling

wicked good, why not suck it all up! Enjoy the woman who has been hiding

behind her shell for years, and let it all out in the open now if you feel

that's what you want!

See ya freak! LOL!

Dawn

Update & I am a freak.

Hi Gals & Guys!

I haven't had a chance to post since Turkey Day---but I've been

reading. Congratulations to all of the new post-ops! Thank you to all

the people whose cards I've received (I'm finishing mine today and

mailing them tomorrow). Even though I'm not so active on this group I

love you all and I'm so glad to have this resource to help me stay on

track.

Things are going really well for me. A few weeks ago I posted about

buying a sweater on the other side---well, now I've started buying my

jeans there too! I feel so good about my body (even though I'm still a

big girl) and that's what this was all about for me. Finally I can look

at myself in the mirror and appreciate what a wonderful instrument my

body is---fat or thin. Thanksgiving was good for me. I ate til I was

comfortably full, took home a plate of leftovers and ate it for three

more days---that's how Thanksgiving should be! When I declined one of

my stuffed mushrooms, my brother's new girlfriends parents tried to get

me to eat one I said " No thanks, I had weight loss surgery, I'm saving

my room for the good stuff. " And when people ask me how I lost so much

weight I'm very candid about it. I know a lot of people aren't

comfortable discussing it (I wasn't at first either) and it's a very

personal decision to tell or not to tell, but as I've said before...I'm

so happy about this that I want other people to see WLS in a positive

light. (BTW---brother's gf's parents were shocked by my honesty but

very happy for me and mom told me how great I looked)

So here's where the " I'm a freak " comes in. I have a new guilt to

replace the guilt of eating. I have become a compulsive flirt. (Not

when my husband is around). Those of you who know me, know my husband

is my sun & moon and I adore him completely. However, certain guys I

work & go to school with have been flirting with me and I'm eating it up

like candy!!! I'm not bitter about the fact that this didn't happen

when I was bigger because I think it was less about my size than it was

that I never gave off any air of self-confidence or sexiness (Not saying

I'm " sexy " ---I've just heard it said that there is nothing sexier than a

woman who is self-confident and comfortable in her own skin). I'm a

COMPLETELY faithful woman, and I would never cross the lines, but I

really ENJOY this newfound attention I'm getting. Am I a bad person?

Has anyone else experienced this phenomenon? Do I have to stop flirting

with the really hot eye candy beefcake in my drawing class???? (please

say no...please tell me I'm extremely normal & healthy and that the

thrill will be gone once the novelty has worn off)

Seeking Affirmation,

F.

277/199/150

6/5/00 Open RNY Dr. Bruce Thayer

December 1, 2000

Glad you had a nice holiday and I don't think you're a freak. Enjoy the

moments you know your heart is in the right place - hugs

Lyssa

December 1, 2000

Hi Kim,

I think it's great that you found something else to satisfy

your " sweet tooth " - I agree with you that confidence is sexy -just

learning the lesson that it's all about how we feel about ourselves

and not the exact number we weigh etc. - is a great gift! Keep

feeling good about you - as far as acting out your flirtations - I'm

sure you know that doing so would not make you feel good about you

and that's the point at which it would become a bad thing - for now

it sounds like some good clean fun! Carry on.

Anita

> Hi Gals & Guys!

> I haven't had a chance to post since Turkey Day---but I've been

> reading. Congratulations to all of the new post-ops! Thank you to

all

> the people whose cards I've received (I'm finishing mine today and

> mailing them tomorrow). Even though I'm not so active on this

group I

> love you all and I'm so glad to have this resource to help me stay

on

> track.

> Things are going really well for me. A few weeks ago I posted about

> buying a sweater on the other side---well, now I've started buying

my

> jeans there too! I feel so good about my body (even though I'm

still a

> big girl) and that's what this was all about for me. Finally I can

look

> at myself in the mirror and appreciate what a wonderful instrument

my

> body is---fat or thin. Thanksgiving was good for me. I ate til I

was

> comfortably full, took home a plate of leftovers and ate it for

three

> more days---that's how Thanksgiving should be! When I declined one

of

> my stuffed mushrooms, my brother's new girlfriends parents tried to

get

> me to eat one I said " No thanks, I had weight loss surgery, I'm

saving

> my room for the good stuff. " And when people ask me how I lost so

much

> weight I'm very candid about it. I know a lot of people aren't

> comfortable discussing it (I wasn't at first either) and it's a very

> personal decision to tell or not to tell, but as I've said

before...I'm

> so happy about this that I want other people to see WLS in a

positive

> light. (BTW---brother's gf's parents were shocked by my honesty but

> very happy for me and mom told me how great I looked)

>

> So here's where the " I'm a freak " comes in. I have a new guilt to

> replace the guilt of eating. I have become a compulsive flirt.

(Not

> when my husband is around). Those of you who know me, know my

husband

> is my sun & moon and I adore him completely. However, certain guys

I

> work & go to school with have been flirting with me and I'm eating

it up

> like candy!!! I'm not bitter about the fact that this didn't happen

> when I was bigger because I think it was less about my size than it

was

> that I never gave off any air of self-confidence or sexiness (Not

saying

> I'm " sexy " ---I've just heard it said that there is nothing sexier

than a

> woman who is self-confident and comfortable in her own skin). I'm a

> COMPLETELY faithful woman, and I would never cross the lines, but I

> really ENJOY this newfound attention I'm getting. Am I a bad

person?

> Has anyone else experienced this phenomenon? Do I have to stop

flirting

> with the really hot eye candy beefcake in my drawing class????

(please

> say no...please tell me I'm extremely normal & healthy and that the

> thrill will be gone once the novelty has worn off)

>

> Seeking Affirmation,

> F.

> 277/199/150

> 6/5/00 Open RNY Dr. Bruce Thayer

December 1, 2000

Anita, Dawn & Lyssa

Thanks for your replies---you're right...I'm OK You're OK LOL I would

NEVER go out of line on this one because as much fun as flirting is,

there is nothing better than being married to my best friend,

confidante, biggest fan & sexiest man alive (in my humble opinion). I

would **never ever** jeopardize anything Jody and I have together. I'm

babbling about it to you guys when normally I'd just talk to him about

it. I haven't said anything to him about it because I know he hasn't

been feeling greatly confident lately because he's started gaining some

weight again. (I think on some level though he would never admit it, he

is bothered by the fact that I weigh less than him now) I guess I just

feel like I'm freshman in high school again because that was the last

time I ever flirted with anyone period! I'm sure this is just a phase

I'm going through, and it's all completely innocent.

Oy, I'm such a spaz

- Queen of the Froot Loops (no not the cereal)

December 1, 2000

I like Fruity Pebbles better!

Dawn

Re: Re: Update & I am a freak.