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In a message dated 08/14/1999 7:23:26 PM Pacific Daylight Time,

bfletch@... writes:

> I argued long and

> hard with my Doc to do a distal and he said I only needed a proximal and

> I would lose all the weight I needed to. I was upset but this doc knows

> wls and my hubby kept saying trust him. I'm about 17 months post op. I

> didn't plummet down as fast as some people did but I have kept losing

> steadily and while my original goal was somewhere around 180 I have kept

> on losing until I'm down below that and have no reason to believe that I

> won't get down to my new goal which is 155. Of course at the rate I'm

> losing now it will take quite a while but that okay also. I know of one

> other person who had a proximal RNY who is at or below their goal weight

> so it isn't impossible.

That is great Bev! My surgeon does not do distal RNY either, he said the

long term stats are no better than proximal, that the risk of nutritional

problems weren't worth and extra couple of pounds, and that you either learn

to eat normally or don't. I know quite a few distals that have done very

well, and they are right on top of their nutritional needs! BTW, my surgeon

provides a weekly support group and his patients that attend, usually do get

down to ideal weight. Sounds to me like you have been able to make the

transition rather easily. I am more stubborn and have had to work harder to

break my old habits and messages.

Vicki

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I had proximal RNY and am within 17 pounds of my goal weight after nine

months time. I think it has to do as much with exercise and water

consumption as it does with the type of surgery you have. The surgery is a

tool, and if you use only that tool the weight will eventually come off. If

you use that tool, but also add other tools to your job, it will get done

better and faster. Just a thought.

B in California

Beverly Fletcher wrote:

>

>

> Hi All,

> I was interested in Vicki said about the proxiaml. I argued long and

> hard with my Doc to do a distal and he said I only needed a proximal and

> I would lose all the weight I needed to. I was upset but this doc knows

> wls and my hubby kept saying trust him. I'm about 17 months post op. I

> didn't plummet down as fast as some people did but I have kept losing

> steadily and while my original goal was somewhere around 180 I have kept

> on losing until I'm down below that and have no reason to believe that I

> won't get down to my new goal which is 155. Of course at the rate I'm

> losing now it will take quite a while but that okay also. I know of one

> other person who had a proximal RNY who is at or below their goal weight

> so it isn't impossible.

>

> What I keep wondering is if I will ever look in the mirror and not see

> where the fat still is. I think I must but incredibly stupid on some

> days I look fat to me no matter what. I wonder if that will ever go

> away???

>

> Hugs to all, Bev

>

> ---------------------------

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,

I read your post and I think how lucky you are and I am jealous. If in 9

months you could be 17 lbs from your goal weight then you obviously were not

like I and many others who were way above the 100 lbs needed to even qualify

for the surgery. I to be at goal (150, IM 5ft 7) would have to lose a total

of 268 lbs.... I have already been told I have 20-30 lbs of hanging skin and

I've only, well I wont say only, lost 168 lbs. I guess IM hypersensitive but

I think you discount the long fight many of us have long past a year and then

with looking like a charpe (sp). Please I know you didn't mean it that way

but in my current state I read your post and all I could feel was sad,

jealous and then somewhat more low. For everyone out there I say we all have

different levels/degrees of emotional and physical layers we have to go

through. I've said this a million times.... I lost 183 lbs in 13 months and

I was on track now IM not....I'll never regret the surgery but right now IM

feeling as if I may have to resign myself to being a 200 lb woman and never

reach the quote on quote " goal I so believe I crave. Anyway God I have

forced myself to stop holding back hoping it will allow me to stop reverting

to stuffing my feelings instead of expressing them. Take this is no way as

an attack... You are doing perfect and I applaud you. Damn have I made any

sense...?

RNY 11/18/97

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Hi Bev

You know I reached goal at about 14 or 15 months out and actually went a

little lower than I feel comfortable with. what I'm dealing with now

sometimes is actually believing that it's gonna stay gone..I wonder if THAT

ever goes away. One day about 6 months ago..I was washing my hands at a

restaurant..and glanced up and saw this skinny woman looking back...I said

to myself.. " who's THAT? " ...honestly..I didn't recognize me....I had always

seen the " me " I was pre op..or the " me " I felt pre op..I catch myself

looking at that stranger in the mirror all the time. I wear a size 4-6

depending on the manufacturer..and I ask my husband all the time if I look

fat...because I still FEEL fat inside...I guess you have to give it

time...we built up our self image during the years we actually WERE

fat...for me thats at least 25 years..I suppose it's gonna take more than a

couple years to make that go away?...

love, De

Proximal RNY August 15, 1997

5 ft 1 in Age 45

Beginning weight 308

Current Weight 114

(194 pounds GONE!)

Proximal RNY

>

>

>Hi All,

>I was interested in Vicki said about the proxiaml. I argued long and

>hard with my Doc to do a distal and he said I only needed a proximal and

>I would lose all the weight I needed to. I was upset but this doc knows

>wls and my hubby kept saying trust him. I'm about 17 months post op. I

>didn't plummet down as fast as some people did but I have kept losing

>steadily and while my original goal was somewhere around 180 I have kept

>on losing until I'm down below that and have no reason to believe that I

>won't get down to my new goal which is 155. Of course at the rate I'm

>losing now it will take quite a while but that okay also. I know of one

>other person who had a proximal RNY who is at or below their goal weight

>so it isn't impossible.

>

>What I keep wondering is if I will ever look in the mirror and not see

>where the fat still is. I think I must but incredibly stupid on some

>days I look fat to me no matter what. I wonder if that will ever go

>away???

>

>Hugs to all, Bev

>

>

>---------------------------

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Yes, , you made perfectly good sense. And you're right that I did not have

as much to lose as many do. I was at 274 when I had surgery (5'5 " ). But that

is

still medically obese and I had all the fun medical conditions to go with it.

As

well as the psychological issues. You'll get to a place where you are

comfortable, but yes, your journey is going to be much longer than mine has

been.

B in California

Gettinthin@... wrote:

> From: Gettinthin@...

>

> ,

>

> I read your post and I think how lucky you are and I am jealous. If in 9

> months you could be 17 lbs from your goal weight then you obviously were not

> like I and many others who were way above the 100 lbs needed to even qualify

> for the surgery. I to be at goal (150, IM 5ft 7) would have to lose a total

> of 268 lbs.... I have already been told I have 20-30 lbs of hanging skin and

> I've only, well I wont say only, lost 168 lbs. I guess IM hypersensitive but

> I think you discount the long fight many of us have long past a year and then

> with looking like a charpe (sp). Please I know you didn't mean it that way

> but in my current state I read your post and all I could feel was sad,

> jealous and then somewhat more low. For everyone out there I say we all have

> different levels/degrees of emotional and physical layers we have to go

> through. I've said this a million times.... I lost 183 lbs in 13 months and

> I was on track now IM not....I'll never regret the surgery but right now IM

> feeling as if I may have to resign myself to being a 200 lb woman and never

> reach the quote on quote " goal I so believe I crave. Anyway God I have

> forced myself to stop holding back hoping it will allow me to stop reverting

> to stuffing my feelings instead of expressing them. Take this is no way as

> an attack... You are doing perfect and I applaud you. Damn have I made any

> sense...?

>

>

> RNY 11/18/97

>

> ---------------------------

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I know the feeling of looking in the mirror and not recognizing

yourself. People tell me every day how good I look, and I have a hard

time accepting the compliments.

I am a year post-op and have lost 186 lbs. I still look in the mirror

and see the 376 lb person that I saw for so long before the surgery.

It is something to get used to. It is getting better for me, but still

takes some getting used to.

I just returned from Seattle for my brother's wedding and he had not

seen me since the surgery or seen a picture of me. He hugged me and

lifted me into the air. Never had that happen before. He told me that

he was so proud of me and that I looked so good. I think finally after

a year that it is sinking in that I can shop in any store for a size 12

rather than at the Large Women's stores, but you know what, when I go

into a store, I always walk to the large sizes first. My fiance will

say, you don't need to be here anymore and I realize that I don't.

I guess the moral of this story is that it takes time for all of us to

realize that we are not the same people that we were before, at least

physically and it took us a long time to get to our heaviest and we

can't expect to get used to being skinny overnight. Best of luck to

all of us who are dealing with this mind-set, but it will come for all

of us someday.

Brigitte

Waterloo, Iowa

RNY 07-28-99

Lost 186 lbs.

--- De wrote:

>

>

> Hi Bev

>

> You know I reached goal at about 14 or 15 months out

> and actually went a

> little lower than I feel comfortable with. what I'm

> dealing with now

> sometimes is actually believing that it's gonna stay

> gone..I wonder if THAT

> ever goes away. One day about 6 months ago..I was

> washing my hands at a

> restaurant..and glanced up and saw this skinny woman

> looking back...I said

> to myself.. " who's THAT? " ...honestly..I didn't

> recognize me....I had always

> seen the " me " I was pre op..or the " me " I felt pre

> op..I catch myself

> looking at that stranger in the mirror all the time.

> I wear a size 4-6

> depending on the manufacturer..and I ask my husband

> all the time if I look

> fat...because I still FEEL fat inside...I guess you

> have to give it

> time...we built up our self image during the years

> we actually WERE

> fat...for me thats at least 25 years..I suppose it's

> gonna take more than a

> couple years to make that go away?...

>

> love, De

> Proximal RNY August 15, 1997

> 5 ft 1 in Age 45

> Beginning weight 308

> Current Weight 114

> (194 pounds GONE!)

> Proximal RNY

>

>

> >From: Beverly Fletcher

>

> >

> >Hi All,

> >I was interested in Vicki said about the proxiaml.

> I argued long and

> >hard with my Doc to do a distal and he said I only

> needed a proximal and

> >I would lose all the weight I needed to. I was

> upset but this doc knows

> >wls and my hubby kept saying trust him. I'm about

> 17 months post op. I

> >didn't plummet down as fast as some people did but

> I have kept losing

> >steadily and while my original goal was somewhere

> around 180 I have kept

> >on losing until I'm down below that and have no

> reason to believe that I

> >won't get down to my new goal which is 155. Of

> course at the rate I'm

> >losing now it will take quite a while but that okay

> also. I know of one

> >other person who had a proximal RNY who is at or

> below their goal weight

> >so it isn't impossible.

> >

> >What I keep wondering is if I will ever look in the

> mirror and not see

> >where the fat still is. I think I must but

> incredibly stupid on some

> >days I look fat to me no matter what. I wonder if

> that will ever go

> >away???

> >

> >Hugs to all, Bev

> >

> >

> >---------------------------

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Hi Vicki,

I think I was lucky because I had changed most of my bad habits before

the surgery. Food had been an enemy to me for a long time and I was

surprised how easy it was to enjoy the really small portions we can eat

now. Food and I aren't enemies any more but I think we have sort of an

uneasy truce. I find I feel so much better eating only a little food

that it has been easy not to want to overdo. Besides my tummy really

has fits if I exceed its limit by only one bite even 17 months after

surgery.

I'm not sure why it has been easier for me than some. I dieted all my

life and never was a very big eater which might have helped. I never

have missed the amount of food and actually have enjoyed the feeling

that I can have a few bites of dessert once in a while or part of a

candy bar. I really don't think much about eating anymore. I can make

a meal on a Balance bar and often do when I'm working. I try to make

sure I'm getting enough protein by keeping cottage cheese around and

having a few bites. So far all my blood work has come back normal so I

guess everything is okay. I wish I understood better the best way to

eat. Sometimes I worry I'm not eating enough and some days I really

forget to eat for long periods and I don't get hungry. Of course

eventually I realize my blood sugar is bottoming out and eat but I don't

think this is the right approach. I'm terrible at organizing my meals

in advance and we are a really busy family (isn't everybody) so without

microwave defrost we would probably starve or eat out a lot.

I think I'm wandering because I'm a little worried about not eating

enough but then I don't know what enough is after this surgery and I

still have about 20 pounds to lose before I'll be at goal so I don't

think it is a problem yet.

You know I think if I didn't have something to worry about I would have

to make something up <GRIN>

Hugs, Bev

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CONGRATULATIONS BRIGITTE!!!!

How wonderful for you. I got goose bumps when I read

this:

> I just returned from Seattle for my brother's

> wedding and he had not

> seen me since the surgery or seen a picture of me.

> He hugged me and

> lifted me into the air. Never had that happen

> before. He told me that

> he was so proud of me and that I looked so good. I

> think finally after

> a year that it is sinking

__________________________________________________

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