when it rains it pours

[Guest guest]

Today is a bad day. I was doing so well and suddenly I am knocked on my ass. It

seems like when it rains it pours. On the advice of my therapist I have been

asserting myself and distancing myself from the drama at work and also looking

for a new job. It is not healthy for me to stay where I work because of the

several BP/NP individuals that I work with. I am frequently the target. Since

I've started to assert myself, it has turned into another nada situation with

the bullying, manipulation and silent treatment. There is little I can do about

it as I am the one who has been labelled " difficult " by these people so it is

assumed I am at fault. Going to HR is not an option because I would have to file

a formal greivance and it's not worth it to me. The only real solution is to

leave.

Although I haven't mentioned it before, hubby has an ex-wife and kids. The

ex-wife is bipolar/NP, the daughter is NP and the son is bipolar with a shopping

list of other issues. His ex is the queen of baby-mama-drama and has started in

again. I could devote 100 pages worth of stuff she has pulled over the past few

years. Just as with nada, there are periods of about 2 months where nothing

happens and all is calm. Then it all breaks lose. She gets his parents involved

and the whole situation boils over. She manipulates all of them into seeing her

as the victim. She lies all the time. I am the only one who sees her for what

she is. You would think that after 20+ years of hubby dealing with her, he would

see her for what she is, but he doesn't.

He and his parents believe every lie and story she tells them. They feel sorry

for her and she has had a " difficult life " - haven't we all?!?! She sucks them

into her tornado and away they go. She upsets everyone, hubby, his parents, his

kids, herself and mostly me, but I seem to be the one who is most affected by

it. I am the one who winds up in tears with anxiety over her antics. I am the

one who has become depressed because the stress level has been too much when it

is combined with her, his kids, work and nada. It got so bad with her showing up

at the door all the time, that we moved and have an unlisted number. She is not

allowed near our home. I have told hubby I will get a court order if I ever see

her around here. He sees his kids regularly and they all have his cell phone and

work number. She used to call all hours of the night leaving messages telling us

that either she or one of the kids was going to kill themselves. She claimed at

one point she was a drug addict and homeless, none of which was true. Now that

she no longer has our home number, she cannot call with the drama, but she can

still stir it up all the time.

To make a long story short, I'm tired. I'm exhausted from dealing with all of

this year in and year out. I made the decision to limit contact with nada and it

seems to have worked to keep her in check. I did what I could to limit contact

with hubby's ex, I haven't seen her in 5 years which is good, but her presence

is very much part of my life. I am working on limiting contact at work. The

problem is, I feel overwhelmed when things like this happen. I get anxious and

physically sick. I cry and then I'm worn out. I feel like I am not in control of

my life at times. It's like I have these swirling dervishes spinning constantly

around me and I'm doing all I can not to get caught up their frenzies.

To make matters worse, nada is arriving in a few days and she's up to her old

traicks again. It seems like everytime the baby-mama-drama starts, nada is here

and I am too mentally exhausted to deal with any of it. I know it's a

coincidence, but she only adds to it. At one point today I was on the verge of

tears at work and I desparately wanted my mother. I stopped myself and had to

remind myself that I cannot go to my mother to talk to her about anything and

she is not capable of giving me the emotional support I need. Suddenly I felt

very alone in the world.

One of the things I have come to understand in therapy is that a time may come

when I may need to walk away from all of them - hubby, nada and the job for my

own sanity. I am okay with that, but right now I just want to be left alone.

Just needed to vent because I know you will understand.

Abby

[Guest guest]

Yes, it really is hard to deal with problems when they come at you in batches.

One or two at a time, yeah, maybe, but in batches its like being attacked by a

swarm of killer bees; all you can do is run.

I totally sympathize.

-Annie

>

> Today is a bad day. I was doing so well and suddenly I am knocked on my ass.

It seems like when it rains it pours. On the advice of my therapist I have been

asserting myself and distancing myself from the drama at work and also looking

for a new job. It is not healthy for me to stay where I work because of the

several BP/NP individuals that I work with. I am frequently the target. Since

I've started to assert myself, it has turned into another nada situation with

the bullying, manipulation and silent treatment. There is little I can do about

it as I am the one who has been labelled " difficult " by these people so it is

assumed I am at fault. Going to HR is not an option because I would have to file

a formal greivance and it's not worth it to me. The only real solution is to

leave.

>

> Although I haven't mentioned it before, hubby has an ex-wife and kids. The

ex-wife is bipolar/NP, the daughter is NP and the son is bipolar with a shopping

list of other issues. His ex is the queen of baby-mama-drama and has started in

again. I could devote 100 pages worth of stuff she has pulled over the past few

years. Just as with nada, there are periods of about 2 months where nothing

happens and all is calm. Then it all breaks lose. She gets his parents involved

and the whole situation boils over. She manipulates all of them into seeing her

as the victim. She lies all the time. I am the only one who sees her for what

she is. You would think that after 20+ years of hubby dealing with her, he would

see her for what she is, but he doesn't.

>

> He and his parents believe every lie and story she tells them. They feel sorry

for her and she has had a " difficult life " - haven't we all?!?! She sucks them

into her tornado and away they go. She upsets everyone, hubby, his parents, his

kids, herself and mostly me, but I seem to be the one who is most affected by

it. I am the one who winds up in tears with anxiety over her antics. I am the

one who has become depressed because the stress level has been too much when it

is combined with her, his kids, work and nada. It got so bad with her showing up

at the door all the time, that we moved and have an unlisted number. She is not

allowed near our home. I have told hubby I will get a court order if I ever see

her around here. He sees his kids regularly and they all have his cell phone and

work number. She used to call all hours of the night leaving messages telling us

that either she or one of the kids was going to kill themselves. She claimed at

one point she was a drug addict and homeless, none of which was true. Now that

she no longer has our home number, she cannot call with the drama, but she can

still stir it up all the time.

>

> To make a long story short, I'm tired. I'm exhausted from dealing with all of

this year in and year out. I made the decision to limit contact with nada and it

seems to have worked to keep her in check. I did what I could to limit contact

with hubby's ex, I haven't seen her in 5 years which is good, but her presence

is very much part of my life. I am working on limiting contact at work. The

problem is, I feel overwhelmed when things like this happen. I get anxious and

physically sick. I cry and then I'm worn out. I feel like I am not in control of

my life at times. It's like I have these swirling dervishes spinning constantly

around me and I'm doing all I can not to get caught up their frenzies.

>

> To make matters worse, nada is arriving in a few days and she's up to her old

traicks again. It seems like everytime the baby-mama-drama starts, nada is here

and I am too mentally exhausted to deal with any of it. I know it's a

coincidence, but she only adds to it. At one point today I was on the verge of

tears at work and I desparately wanted my mother. I stopped myself and had to

remind myself that I cannot go to my mother to talk to her about anything and

she is not capable of giving me the emotional support I need. Suddenly I felt

very alone in the world.

>

> One of the things I have come to understand in therapy is that a time may come

when I may need to walk away from all of them - hubby, nada and the job for my

own sanity. I am okay with that, but right now I just want to be left alone.

>

> Just needed to vent because I know you will understand.

> Abby

>

[Guest guest]

Abby,

I have no answers for you, just wanted to say that this makes so much sense to

me. I can understand why you feel so exhausted and sad and overwhelmed. Please

know that you are loved and supported, and I'm sending you hugs and

encouragement. I wish you some peace and rest; you deserve it.

Sincerely,

>

> Today is a bad day. I was doing so well and suddenly I am knocked on my ass.

It seems like when it rains it pours.

[Guest guest]

Abby, so sorry everything's rain right now. I know what that space is like all

too well, it seems like everything reaches its worst all at the same time and

the natural person you'd turn to at a time like that...well is part of the

problem. With your nada arriving in a few days too that has got to make

everything else harder to take also. I give myself permission during those

times to take more of whatever antidepressant I'm on - or if I'm not on one,

start one temporarily - the emotional intensity of it can be a lot to bear. Is

there something you can take if you need to? Getting out of your work

situation sounds important and that IS something you know you can control

ultimately - once you quit it's permanent goodbye to them. All we can do is

work to change what's in our power to change. Hope the rain lightens up soon.

>

> Today is a bad day. I was doing so well and suddenly I am knocked on my ass.

It seems like when it rains it pours. On the advice of my therapist I have been

asserting myself and distancing myself from the drama at work and also looking

for a new job. It is not healthy for me to stay where I work because of the

several BP/NP individuals that I work with. I am frequently the target. Since

I've started to assert myself, it has turned into another nada situation with

the bullying, manipulation and silent treatment. There is little I can do about

it as I am the one who has been labelled " difficult " by these people so it is

assumed I am at fault. Going to HR is not an option because I would have to file

a formal greivance and it's not worth it to me. The only real solution is to

leave.

>

> Although I haven't mentioned it before, hubby has an ex-wife and kids. The

ex-wife is bipolar/NP, the daughter is NP and the son is bipolar with a shopping

list of other issues. His ex is the queen of baby-mama-drama and has started in

again. I could devote 100 pages worth of stuff she has pulled over the past few

years. Just as with nada, there are periods of about 2 months where nothing

happens and all is calm. Then it all breaks lose. She gets his parents involved

and the whole situation boils over. She manipulates all of them into seeing her

as the victim. She lies all the time. I am the only one who sees her for what

she is. You would think that after 20+ years of hubby dealing with her, he would

see her for what she is, but he doesn't.

>

> He and his parents believe every lie and story she tells them. They feel sorry

for her and she has had a " difficult life " - haven't we all?!?! She sucks them

into her tornado and away they go. She upsets everyone, hubby, his parents, his

kids, herself and mostly me, but I seem to be the one who is most affected by

it. I am the one who winds up in tears with anxiety over her antics. I am the

one who has become depressed because the stress level has been too much when it

is combined with her, his kids, work and nada. It got so bad with her showing up

at the door all the time, that we moved and have an unlisted number. She is not

allowed near our home. I have told hubby I will get a court order if I ever see

her around here. He sees his kids regularly and they all have his cell phone and

work number. She used to call all hours of the night leaving messages telling us

that either she or one of the kids was going to kill themselves. She claimed at

one point she was a drug addict and homeless, none of which was true. Now that

she no longer has our home number, she cannot call with the drama, but she can

still stir it up all the time.

>

> To make a long story short, I'm tired. I'm exhausted from dealing with all of

this year in and year out. I made the decision to limit contact with nada and it

seems to have worked to keep her in check. I did what I could to limit contact

with hubby's ex, I haven't seen her in 5 years which is good, but her presence

is very much part of my life. I am working on limiting contact at work. The

problem is, I feel overwhelmed when things like this happen. I get anxious and

physically sick. I cry and then I'm worn out. I feel like I am not in control of

my life at times. It's like I have these swirling dervishes spinning constantly

around me and I'm doing all I can not to get caught up their frenzies.

>

> To make matters worse, nada is arriving in a few days and she's up to her old

traicks again. It seems like everytime the baby-mama-drama starts, nada is here

and I am too mentally exhausted to deal with any of it. I know it's a

coincidence, but she only adds to it. At one point today I was on the verge of

tears at work and I desparately wanted my mother. I stopped myself and had to

remind myself that I cannot go to my mother to talk to her about anything and

she is not capable of giving me the emotional support I need. Suddenly I felt

very alone in the world.

>

> One of the things I have come to understand in therapy is that a time may come

when I may need to walk away from all of them - hubby, nada and the job for my

own sanity. I am okay with that, but right now I just want to be left alone.

>

> Just needed to vent because I know you will understand.

> Abby

>

[Guest guest]

Oh, Abby, I feel so badly for you. You are always supportive and helpful to

this list, and I feel like I can't help you at all. I don't know how old

your step children are, but once they reach 18, you no longer have to have

anything to do with their mother...I does seem like everything falls on you

at once...same here...if one thing goes wrong, it seems like 3-4 more will

follow :-(

Jackie

> Today is a bad day. I was doing so well and suddenly I am knocked on my

> ass. It seems like when it rains it pours. On the advice of my therapist I

> have been asserting myself and distancing myself from the drama at work

> and also looking for a new job. It is not healthy for me to stay where I

> work because of the several BP/NP individuals that I work with. I am

> frequently the target. Since I've started to assert myself, it has turned

> into another nada situation with the bullying, manipulation and silent

> treatment. There is little I can do about it as I am the one who has been

> labelled " difficult " by these people so it is assumed I am at fault. Going

> to HR is not an option because I would have to file a formal greivance and

> it's not worth it to me. The only real solution is to leave.

>

> Although I haven't mentioned it before, hubby has an ex-wife and kids. The

> ex-wife is bipolar/NP, the daughter is NP and the son is bipolar with a

> shopping list of other issues. His ex is the queen of baby-mama-drama and

> has started in again. I could devote 100 pages worth of stuff she has

> pulled over the past few years. Just as with nada, there are periods of

> about 2 months where nothing happens and all is calm. Then it all breaks

> lose. She gets his parents involved and the whole situation boils over.

> She manipulates all of them into seeing her as the victim. She lies all

> the time. I am the only one who sees her for what she is. You would think

> that after 20+ years of hubby dealing with her, he would see her for what

> she is, but he doesn't.

>

> He and his parents believe every lie and story she tells them. They feel

> sorry for her and she has had a " difficult life " - haven't we all?!?! She

> sucks them into her tornado and away they go. She upsets everyone, hubby,

> his parents, his kids, herself and mostly me, but I seem to be the one who

> is most affected by it. I am the one who winds up in tears with anxiety

> over her antics. I am the one who has become depressed because the stress

> level has been too much when it is combined with her, his kids, work and

> nada. It got so bad with her showing up at the door all the time, that we

> moved and have an unlisted number. She is not allowed near our home. I

> have told hubby I will get a court order if I ever see her around here. He

> sees his kids regularly and they all have his cell phone and work number.

> She used to call all hours of the night leaving messages telling us that

> either she or one of the kids was going to kill themselves. She claimed at

> one point she was a drug addict and homeless, none of which was true. Now

> that she no longer has our home number, she cannot call with the drama,

> but she can still stir it up all the time.

>

> To make a long story short, I'm tired. I'm exhausted from dealing with all

> of this year in and year out. I made the decision to limit contact with

> nada and it seems to have worked to keep her in check. I did what I could

> to limit contact with hubby's ex, I haven't seen her in 5 years which is

> good, but her presence is very much part of my life. I am working on

> limiting contact at work. The problem is, I feel overwhelmed when things

> like this happen. I get anxious and physically sick. I cry and then I'm

> worn out. I feel like I am not in control of my life at times. It's like I

> have these swirling dervishes spinning constantly around me and I'm doing

> all I can not to get caught up their frenzies.

>

> To make matters worse, nada is arriving in a few days and she's up to her

> old traicks again. It seems like everytime the baby-mama-drama starts,

> nada is here and I am too mentally exhausted to deal with any of it. I

> know it's a coincidence, but she only adds to it. At one point today I was

> on the verge of tears at work and I desparately wanted my mother. I

> stopped myself and had to remind myself that I cannot go to my mother to

> talk to her about anything and she is not capable of giving me the

> emotional support I need. Suddenly I felt very alone in the world.

>

> One of the things I have come to understand in therapy is that a time may

> come when I may need to walk away from all of them - hubby, nada and the

> job for my own sanity. I am okay with that, but right now I just want to

> be left alone.

>

> Just needed to vent because I know you will understand.

> Abby

>

[Guest guest]

Abby - your post hit a couple of nerves. First, the job - over the years I

worked at a few places where the roost was ruled by nasty weirdos (I'm sure they

had diagnosable problems, but to me, they were just nasty weirdos). Life was

horrible every working day, and the paychecks were just barely worth it. At one

point I spent seven and a half years of my LIFE working at a place that was

widely known as a " meat grinder " - it took talented people, used them up and

spit them out. Once I left there for a firm run by sane, balanced people, life

was SO much better - and my own career trajectory made several leaps in a short

time, because happy people just do better work.

So yes, try to get out. Don't beat yourself over the head and tell yourself it

will get better if you just work harder. There are good companies out there -

no need to stay mired in the world of the nasty weirdos.

About your husband's ex and kids - this sounds, in a way, so much like my

husband's family. His dad died this summer, and he seems to have taken on the

role of paterfamilias for his idiot brother and the brother's passel of

dysfunctional kids - and THEIR kids. The whole bunch of them are involved in

constant drama from bad choices, bad parenting, and general shiftlessness. I

hoped for years that after my mother in law and father in law passed away, we'd

be able to disengage from these people, but my husband seems to want to enmesh

himself with them. He doesn't " get " that he can't solve their problems for

them, and that this kind of dysfunction is infectious. So he spends his time

dealing with them, instead of doing something positive for our own nuclear

family, and if I say a word about it he becomes angry. One of the nieces (who

has caused a lot of the trouble) has always been quick to whine and cry, and

play the waif. No matter what happens, she wilts at the first sign of

disapproval and wails that her life is sooooo hard (yeah, gee, why is that?).

And her entire family believes her and makes excuses for her. It would be funny

if it weren't so irritating, and if there weren't three little kids depending on

her. I don't wish these people any more misfortune (they create plenty of that

for themselves) - but I just want to be DONE with them. I don't think my

husband will ever come to his senses and realize that NC is our best option for

our own future. The more I learn about my own Nada, and the firmer my commitment

to staying NC/LC with her for my own sanity, the more I realize that's what we

need to do with the brother-in-law's family as well. My husband has a whole set

of cousins who are sane, functional, nice people. It's not like we'd be

orphaning ourselves completely.

There's a line from the Rolling Stones' song, " Sweet Virginia " - " Got to scrape

that sh#$ right off your shoes " - that's how I feel about this bunch. I'm

scraping as hard as I can, but I can't seem to dislodge them.

So I don't have any answers for you, Abby, but I sure can commiserate. -

>

> Today is a bad day. I was doing so well and suddenly I am knocked on my ass.

It seems like when it rains it pours. On the advice of my therapist I have been

asserting myself and distancing myself from the drama at work and also looking

for a new job. It is not healthy for me to stay where I work because of the

several BP/NP individuals that I work with. I am frequently the target. Since

I've started to assert myself, it has turned into another nada situation with

the bullying, manipulation and silent treatment. There is little I can do about

it as I am the one who has been labelled " difficult " by these people so it is

assumed I am at fault. Going to HR is not an option because I would have to file

a formal greivance and it's not worth it to me. The only real solution is to

leave.

>

> Although I haven't mentioned it before, hubby has an ex-wife and kids. The

ex-wife is bipolar/NP, the daughter is NP and the son is bipolar with a shopping

list of other issues. His ex is the queen of baby-mama-drama and has started in

again. I could devote 100 pages worth of stuff she has pulled over the past few

years. Just as with nada, there are periods of about 2 months where nothing

happens and all is calm. Then it all breaks lose. She gets his parents involved

and the whole situation boils over. She manipulates all of them into seeing her

as the victim. She lies all the time. I am the only one who sees her for what

she is. You would think that after 20+ years of hubby dealing with her, he would

see her for what she is, but he doesn't.

>

> He and his parents believe every lie and story she tells them. They feel sorry

for her and she has had a " difficult life " - haven't we all?!?! She sucks them

into her tornado and away they go. She upsets everyone, hubby, his parents, his

kids, herself and mostly me, but I seem to be the one who is most affected by

it. I am the one who winds up in tears with anxiety over her antics. I am the

one who has become depressed because the stress level has been too much when it

is combined with her, his kids, work and nada. It got so bad with her showing up

at the door all the time, that we moved and have an unlisted number. She is not

allowed near our home. I have told hubby I will get a court order if I ever see

her around here. He sees his kids regularly and they all have his cell phone and

work number. She used to call all hours of the night leaving messages telling us

that either she or one of the kids was going to kill themselves. She claimed at

one point she was a drug addict and homeless, none of which was true. Now that

she no longer has our home number, she cannot call with the drama, but she can

still stir it up all the time.

>

> To make a long story short, I'm tired. I'm exhausted from dealing with all of

this year in and year out. I made the decision to limit contact with nada and it

seems to have worked to keep her in check. I did what I could to limit contact

with hubby's ex, I haven't seen her in 5 years which is good, but her presence

is very much part of my life. I am working on limiting contact at work. The

problem is, I feel overwhelmed when things like this happen. I get anxious and

physically sick. I cry and then I'm worn out. I feel like I am not in control of

my life at times. It's like I have these swirling dervishes spinning constantly

around me and I'm doing all I can not to get caught up their frenzies.

>

> To make matters worse, nada is arriving in a few days and she's up to her old

traicks again. It seems like everytime the baby-mama-drama starts, nada is here

and I am too mentally exhausted to deal with any of it. I know it's a

coincidence, but she only adds to it. At one point today I was on the verge of

tears at work and I desparately wanted my mother. I stopped myself and had to

remind myself that I cannot go to my mother to talk to her about anything and

she is not capable of giving me the emotional support I need. Suddenly I felt

very alone in the world.

>

> One of the things I have come to understand in therapy is that a time may come

when I may need to walk away from all of them - hubby, nada and the job for my

own sanity. I am okay with that, but right now I just want to be left alone.

>

> Just needed to vent because I know you will understand.

> Abby

>

[Guest guest]

Jackie & Everyone,

Thanks for your kind words. I had a good cry last night and I feel much better.

Abby

>

> Oh, Abby, I feel so badly for you. You are always supportive and helpful to

> this list, and I feel like I can't help you at all. I don't know how old

> your step children are, but once they reach 18, you no longer have to have

> anything to do with their mother...I does seem like everything falls on you

> at once...same here...if one thing goes wrong, it seems like 3-4 more will

> follow :-(

>

> Jackie

>

[Guest guest]

Abby,

I'm sorry you're overwhelmed. I totally understand feeling all alone in the

world.

Joanna

In WTOAdultChildren1 , " sleddog " wrote:

>

> Oh, Abby, I feel so badly for you. You are always supportive and helpful to

> this list, and I feel like I can't help you at all. I don't know how old

> your step children are, but once they reach 18, you no longer have to have

> anything to do with their mother...I does seem like everything falls on you

> at once...same here...if one thing goes wrong, it seems like 3-4 more will

> follow :-(

>

> Jackie

>

>

> > Today is a bad day. I was doing so well and suddenly I am knocked on my

> > ass. It seems like when it rains it pours. On the advice of my therapist I

> > have been asserting myself and distancing myself from the drama at work

> > and also looking for a new job. It is not healthy for me to stay where I

> > work because of the several BP/NP individuals that I work with. I am

> > frequently the target. Since I've started to assert myself, it has turned

> > into another nada situation with the bullying, manipulation and silent

> > treatment. There is little I can do about it as I am the one who has been

> > labelled " difficult " by these people so it is assumed I am at fault. Going

> > to HR is not an option because I would have to file a formal greivance and

> > it's not worth it to me. The only real solution is to leave.

> >

> > Although I haven't mentioned it before, hubby has an ex-wife and kids. The

> > ex-wife is bipolar/NP, the daughter is NP and the son is bipolar with a

> > shopping list of other issues. His ex is the queen of baby-mama-drama and

> > has started in again. I could devote 100 pages worth of stuff she has

> > pulled over the past few years. Just as with nada, there are periods of

> > about 2 months where nothing happens and all is calm. Then it all breaks

> > lose. She gets his parents involved and the whole situation boils over.

> > She manipulates all of them into seeing her as the victim. She lies all

> > the time. I am the only one who sees her for what she is. You would think

> > that after 20+ years of hubby dealing with her, he would see her for what

> > she is, but he doesn't.

> >

> > He and his parents believe every lie and story she tells them. They feel

> > sorry for her and she has had a " difficult life " - haven't we all?!?! She

> > sucks them into her tornado and away they go. She upsets everyone, hubby,

> > his parents, his kids, herself and mostly me, but I seem to be the one who

> > is most affected by it. I am the one who winds up in tears with anxiety

> > over her antics. I am the one who has become depressed because the stress

> > level has been too much when it is combined with her, his kids, work and

> > nada. It got so bad with her showing up at the door all the time, that we

> > moved and have an unlisted number. She is not allowed near our home. I

> > have told hubby I will get a court order if I ever see her around here. He

> > sees his kids regularly and they all have his cell phone and work number.

> > She used to call all hours of the night leaving messages telling us that

> > either she or one of the kids was going to kill themselves. She claimed at

> > one point she was a drug addict and homeless, none of which was true. Now

> > that she no longer has our home number, she cannot call with the drama,

> > but she can still stir it up all the time.

> >

> > To make a long story short, I'm tired. I'm exhausted from dealing with all

> > of this year in and year out. I made the decision to limit contact with

> > nada and it seems to have worked to keep her in check. I did what I could

> > to limit contact with hubby's ex, I haven't seen her in 5 years which is

> > good, but her presence is very much part of my life. I am working on

> > limiting contact at work. The problem is, I feel overwhelmed when things

> > like this happen. I get anxious and physically sick. I cry and then I'm

> > worn out. I feel like I am not in control of my life at times. It's like I

> > have these swirling dervishes spinning constantly around me and I'm doing

> > all I can not to get caught up their frenzies.

> >

> > To make matters worse, nada is arriving in a few days and she's up to her

> > old traicks again. It seems like everytime the baby-mama-drama starts,

> > nada is here and I am too mentally exhausted to deal with any of it. I

> > know it's a coincidence, but she only adds to it. At one point today I was

> > on the verge of tears at work and I desparately wanted my mother. I

> > stopped myself and had to remind myself that I cannot go to my mother to

> > talk to her about anything and she is not capable of giving me the

> > emotional support I need. Suddenly I felt very alone in the world.

> >

> > One of the things I have come to understand in therapy is that a time may

> > come when I may need to walk away from all of them - hubby, nada and the

> > job for my own sanity. I am okay with that, but right now I just want to

> > be left alone.

> >

> > Just needed to vent because I know you will understand.

> > Abby

> >

>