Re: Needing Advice(sorry if this is long)

[Guest guest]

Sandi,

Does your daughter have any hearing difficulties as well? Is there a deaf

/blind educational department in your state?

You shouldn't say you want a 1 on 1 for your daughter, it is that your

daughter needs one to be a fully functioning student within her class. Also we

have

tried and tried to use doctor recommendations but school systems only have to

listen to what they say, they do not have to do it. It depends on your

school system and the people involved whether or not they take those

recommendations into consideration.

What you would probably need is some outside sort of assistance with

individuals of an educational profession to assist your district in

understanding your

daughter. Do you

have someone for the blind?

Patty had her own 1 on 1 her entire educational career. She sure as heck

didn't get to close to any of them. Actually she fought against that. She

needed assistance, not a mother. She only had a total of 4. 2 were good and 2

were horrible. Oh, and also the assistants needed training about her and her

needs. Often the assistants hired in school districts have no or little

experience with children who have special needs. Then because of that they

often end

up with opinions about their students that are harmful to them as a learner and

as a person. You don't just want an assistant, you want someone who can and

will provide your child with the appropriate help. And you want someone to

not be stuck at your childs side all day long either. That can be socially

limiting.

Know the laws too. Look up the revision of PL94-182 (right guys)? And know

how that impacts your chills education.

Been there, done that!

Best Wishes,

Bonnie, Kris 21- 22 tomorrow, Patty CHARGE 19-20 on the 13th, and wife to

[Guest guest]

Sandi,

I agree with on this. A letter is a powerful tool and much more

difficult to ignore than a verbal discussion. It also gives you the

opportunity to collect your thoughts and present them in a manner that the

system is likely to take seriously. Of course a meeting following the

letter is also valuable as you can then expand on the contents of the letter

and add to it if need be. If a meeting is had, insist that the

content,(discussions, decisions made, disagreements - including reasons for

these etc) is clearly documented and a copy sent to you. That way, you

have documented statements on which to base your next step. If your doctor,

as Michele says, can support your case, then great, even better.

We have had to go down this route once or twice, but have been lucky that

the letters alone plus perhaps an odd meeting have ressolved the issues with

the education authority or the school.

Very good luck, and believe me, the notion that the child becomes dependent

on their 1:1 is not necessarily true. Yes, the first person (4) is

likely to go to for help is her 1:1 assistant but if she is not there, life

does not stop for her as all the staff in the classroom work with her,

albeit not as intensively. In our case, the school itself requested the 1:1

on the grounds of health and safety and to ensure that receives

appropriate education in view of her combined hearing and vision loss and

developmental delay plus all the other sensory issues etc - eg tactile

defensiveness. They acknowledged that she could fall over any number of

equipment in the classroom alone. The reality as far as we can see is that

having the assistance has made her a more confident child who no longer

needs to have the assistant at her side for every minute of every day. The

assistant can now watch her from a relative disatance in the playground.

Again, good luck with this. The whole issue of the way schools respond to

our children's needs is an emotive one as I note from the many start of year

issues arising on this listserve.

Sending lots of strength vibes and fighting spirit your way ............

Flo

[Guest guest]

Sandi,

I know that getting lawyers involved is usually the last option, but when

your daughter's safety is involved you may need to move faster. A letter

from your lawyer & doctor, stating that when she is at school they are

responsible for her well being and accountable for her safety or lack of,

may make them think " lawsuit " .

I have zero tolerance for people that don't or won't take our safety

concerns seriously.

Jeanie Colp

mom to MacKenzie 6 CHARGE, Tyler 12 & Zachary10 ( both with strep throat)

Nova Scotia, Canada>

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[Guest guest]

Hi,

I have hesitated telling this because it is not something I am proud that I

did...but When the school told me they knew what my son needed and that they

would NOT provide a 1 to 1 even with letters from numerous doctors and our

attorney I decided to stoop to their level...I then asked what company held

their liability insurance with their phone number..... when she asked why I

needed it I told her I was interested to find out what type of coverage they

had and if they were aware that she was putting my son in harms way by not

assuring his safety at all times during the day....Well she would not give me

the

satisfaction of knowing she caved in but my son now has a para technically

for the whole class but my son is the only child who uses her services....Plus

I have know who hold the insurance...

Good luck....

Ellen

[Guest guest]

Ellen,

Perhaps I just have no conscience but if I was you, I would be very proud.

Desperate situations need extreme measures and hopefully your son is now

safe and able to participate more fully in the school activities. Now

there's one for me to keep for future reference, never know when it might

come in useful.

Flo

>From: esteinbrick1@...

>Reply-To: CHARGE

>To: CHARGE

>Subject: Re: Needing Advice(sorry if this is long)

>Date: Mon, 13 Sep 2004 13:39:07 EDT

>

>Hi,

>I have hesitated telling this because it is not something I am proud that I

>did...but When the school told me they knew what my son needed and that

>they

>would NOT provide a 1 to 1 even with letters from numerous doctors and our

>attorney I decided to stoop to their level...I then asked what company held

>their liability insurance with their phone number..... when she asked why

>I

>needed it I told her I was interested to find out what type of coverage

>they

>had and if they were aware that she was putting my son in harms way by not

>assuring his safety at all times during the day....Well she would not give

>me the

>satisfaction of knowing she caved in but my son now has a para technically

>for the whole class but my son is the only child who uses her

>services....Plus

>I have know who hold the insurance...

>Good luck....

>

>Ellen

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Ellen,

Why hesitate to tell what you did? It's not how you got the

services..it's that you did get the services for him. It was not

only effective, but creative. Good for you!

Sheryl

Mom to Mitch 18 & 18 CHARGE

> Hi,

> I have hesitated telling this because it is not something I am

proud that I

> did...but When the school told me they knew what my son needed and

that they

> would NOT provide a 1 to 1 even with letters from numerous doctors

and our

> attorney I decided to stoop to their level...I then asked what

company held

> their liability insurance with their phone number..... when she

asked why I

> needed it I told her I was interested to find out what type of

coverage they

> had and if they were aware that she was putting my son in harms

way by not

> assuring his safety at all times during the day....Well she would

not give me the

> satisfaction of knowing she caved in but my son now has a para

technically

> for the whole class but my son is the only child who uses her

services....Plus

> I have know who hold the insurance...

> Good luck....

>

> Ellen

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Please remember that our is now 20. From the very beginning of her

school experience, a dear friend, someone who was active in education

and disability issues on a national level, told me that as soon as I asked

the first question in a meeting, the powers-that-be in the school and

district marked my husband and me as a problem. I resisted this idea for

many years because WE were so ready to work with these folks. Alas, my

friend was correct. If your child needs something, fight for it. No one else

will. Try being oh so nice, but don't allow yourself to waste much of your

child's time. Another friend, the head of a university dept., has been

unable to figure out how our district can keep such a close collar on its

teachers: they will not stand up for any child. At a university level, this

wouldn't be possible. All I can do is keep saying, if you know that your

child needs X, go for it, even if it means a battle. Our kids only have so

many years to derive help and nourishment from their schools. If

pleasantness and a cooperative spirit on your part won't work, think

through to your next strategy..... Martha