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Dear and Ed,

I remember the terrible depression that consumed me pre-diagnosis. It

can be very debilitating. Ed, try to remember that things will get better.

For me, the very worst time of all were those four months of being so very

sick and not knowing why. I can remember sitting on my couch, staring at

the carpet beneath my feet and having to TELL myself to look up. At the

same time, my then husband of 18 years decided he didn't want to be married

to someone who couldn't work. Admitted he couldn't handle the

responsibility. When the diagnosis came through, it was determined that I

would probably never be able to work again and he just stepped out of my

life. His three wonderful daughters and my son took over and took care of

me until I began to improve on the medication. Ed, please confide in

us...we've all been where you are now and we know it's temporary. You have

. Let her help you through this. Please talk to your doctors about the

depression...perhaps they can give you something for this awful waiting

period. You are in our thoughts and prayers, Ed. You too, . Some good

will come from all this, I promise. Annette

Just checking in

Good morning all,

Thought I would let you know that we are still alive. Ed is not

doing well. He is very depressed. He had a friend call yesterday

who is starting up a company in his field and wanted Ed to come work

with him. Ed also had a really nice job lined up when he retired

with the goverment and now he cannot take that posistion. He feels

really worthless. He has been having a really tough time as you all

know. I bought him a walker so he could get around without me

pushing him around in the wheelchair. He will use the walker until

he cannot take it anymore then we (the family) take turns getting him

from here to there in the chair. I am really worried about his

mental state. Please keep him in your prayers.

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Dear and Ed,

I remember the terrible depression that consumed me pre-diagnosis. It

can be very debilitating. Ed, try to remember that things will get better.

For me, the very worst time of all were those four months of being so very

sick and not knowing why. I can remember sitting on my couch, staring at

the carpet beneath my feet and having to TELL myself to look up. At the

same time, my then husband of 18 years decided he didn't want to be married

to someone who couldn't work. Admitted he couldn't handle the

responsibility. When the diagnosis came through, it was determined that I

would probably never be able to work again and he just stepped out of my

life. His three wonderful daughters and my son took over and took care of

me until I began to improve on the medication. Ed, please confide in

us...we've all been where you are now and we know it's temporary. You have

. Let her help you through this. Please talk to your doctors about the

depression...perhaps they can give you something for this awful waiting

period. You are in our thoughts and prayers, Ed. You too, . Some good

will come from all this, I promise. Annette

Just checking in

Good morning all,

Thought I would let you know that we are still alive. Ed is not

doing well. He is very depressed. He had a friend call yesterday

who is starting up a company in his field and wanted Ed to come work

with him. Ed also had a really nice job lined up when he retired

with the goverment and now he cannot take that posistion. He feels

really worthless. He has been having a really tough time as you all

know. I bought him a walker so he could get around without me

pushing him around in the wheelchair. He will use the walker until

he cannot take it anymore then we (the family) take turns getting him

from here to there in the chair. I am really worried about his

mental state. Please keep him in your prayers.

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Dear and Ed,

I remember the terrible depression that consumed me pre-diagnosis. It

can be very debilitating. Ed, try to remember that things will get better.

For me, the very worst time of all were those four months of being so very

sick and not knowing why. I can remember sitting on my couch, staring at

the carpet beneath my feet and having to TELL myself to look up. At the

same time, my then husband of 18 years decided he didn't want to be married

to someone who couldn't work. Admitted he couldn't handle the

responsibility. When the diagnosis came through, it was determined that I

would probably never be able to work again and he just stepped out of my

life. His three wonderful daughters and my son took over and took care of

me until I began to improve on the medication. Ed, please confide in

us...we've all been where you are now and we know it's temporary. You have

. Let her help you through this. Please talk to your doctors about the

depression...perhaps they can give you something for this awful waiting

period. You are in our thoughts and prayers, Ed. You too, . Some good

will come from all this, I promise. Annette

Just checking in

Good morning all,

Thought I would let you know that we are still alive. Ed is not

doing well. He is very depressed. He had a friend call yesterday

who is starting up a company in his field and wanted Ed to come work

with him. Ed also had a really nice job lined up when he retired

with the goverment and now he cannot take that posistion. He feels

really worthless. He has been having a really tough time as you all

know. I bought him a walker so he could get around without me

pushing him around in the wheelchair. He will use the walker until

he cannot take it anymore then we (the family) take turns getting him

from here to there in the chair. I am really worried about his

mental state. Please keep him in your prayers.

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You really have a handfull. There are times

when one member of the family has to be

strong for the rest.

It's bad enough (and depressing enought) when

you know what you have but the uncertainty

and not knowing is the worst.

I had always been a very independent person

and to go from that to someone who couldn't

even position herself in a chair, etc. was a

hard thing to handle. I function now with a

few limitations but even after 6 yrs depression

still sneaks in at times.

If it's any comfort to Ed, things will get better

and once he knows what he has he can fight

it.

My prayers are with both of you.

hugs

Teddi

mailto:teddifromok@...

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You really have a handfull. There are times

when one member of the family has to be

strong for the rest.

It's bad enough (and depressing enought) when

you know what you have but the uncertainty

and not knowing is the worst.

I had always been a very independent person

and to go from that to someone who couldn't

even position herself in a chair, etc. was a

hard thing to handle. I function now with a

few limitations but even after 6 yrs depression

still sneaks in at times.

If it's any comfort to Ed, things will get better

and once he knows what he has he can fight

it.

My prayers are with both of you.

hugs

Teddi

mailto:teddifromok@...

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Hi !

I feel the same way does...angry that it's taken

so long to get Ed treatment! Everyone else has given

wonderful advice. Yes, we fall into a black hole of

depression. I know I didn't even recognize myself

those months before treatment began. makes

great points...men do handle this differently. Their

identities are so tied up in being the bread winner,

of being macho and not admitting to weakness. To have

to pass on a job offered from a friend has got to be

one heck of a blow.

Any chance you can talk him into seeing a counselor?

I know a lot falls on your shoulders, , but can

you call his primary doc...and lay it all out, as

suggests, before too much time passes. The

thing with the military docs is not to get too

emotional...lay out facts, symptoms and the effects

you're seeing...and then ask them " What steps are you

going to take and how fast will you take them now that

Ed's situation has been allowed to get to crisis? "

I wish I had more advice...except give him love and

hugs and understanding, but don't let him wallow in

self-pity. Geez...building the Eiffel tower might be

easier...but Ed is such a good guy. Sic Endora on

him, too!

You, Ed and the kids are in my prayers!

Hugs,

Lynn

--- edsmary84 wrote:

> Good morning all,

>

> Thought I would let you know that we are still

> alive. Ed is not

> doing well. He is very depressed. He had a friend

> call yesterday

> who is starting up a company in his field and wanted

> Ed to come work

> with him. Ed also had a really nice job lined up

> when he retired

> with the goverment and now he cannot take that

> posistion. He feels

> really worthless. He has been having a really tough

> time as you all

> know. I bought him a walker so he could get around

> without me

> pushing him around in the wheelchair. He will use

> the walker until

> he cannot take it anymore then we (the family) take

> turns getting him

> from here to there in the chair. I am really

> worried about his

> mental state. Please keep him in your prayers.

>

>

>

>

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Oh ,

Your post brought tears to my eyes. I am so sorry that Ed is having such a

rough time. Hopefully, he is getting close to a dx. I can't really say if

became depressed because he was so young. Just about to turn 3. I do

remember that he kept talking when previously he had talked all the time.

He also stopped laughing and smiling. So, I guess he probably was

experiencing depression. I know it is painful to watch a loved one go

through this and the frustration of not being able to " fix " it. You can be

sure that you are both in my thoughts. Keep us up to date on how Ed, and

you too, are doing. Tell Ed I am sending positive thoughts his way.

Hugs, Cari

>

>Reply-To: OurMyositis

>To: OurMyositis

>Subject: Just checking in

>Date: Tue, 12 Feb 2002 16:30:00 -0000

>

>Good morning all,

>

>Thought I would let you know that we are still alive. Ed is not

>doing well. He is very depressed. He had a friend call yesterday

>who is starting up a company in his field and wanted Ed to come work

>with him. Ed also had a really nice job lined up when he retired

>with the goverment and now he cannot take that posistion. He feels

>really worthless. He has been having a really tough time as you all

>know. I bought him a walker so he could get around without me

>pushing him around in the wheelchair. He will use the walker until

>he cannot take it anymore then we (the family) take turns getting him

>from here to there in the chair. I am really worried about his

>mental state. Please keep him in your prayers.

>

_________________________________________________________________

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,

I am sorry to hear that Ed is down. I know that this disease is hard and especially with all he is going through trying to get a diagnosis. That is the hardest part-the not knowing. Let him know we are thinking about him and miss that 'Ever-lovin' Duck' and his quit wit!!!

Zanna

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