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Can you cry under water?

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How important does a person

have to be before they

are considered assassinated

instead of just murdered

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Why do you have to

"put your two cents in"..

but it's only a "penny

for your thoughts"? Where's

that extra penny going to?

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Once you're in heaven, do you

get stuck wearing the clothes

you were buried in for eternity?

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Why does a round pizza

come in a square box?

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What disease did

cured ham actually have?

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How is it that we put man on

the moon before we figured

out it would be a good idea

to put wheels on luggage?

**************************

Why is it that people say they

"slept like a baby" when babies

wake up like every two hours?

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If a deaf person has to go to

court, is it still called a hearing?

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Why are you IN a movie,

but you're ON TV?

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Why do people pay to go up

tall buildings and then put

money in binoculars to look

at things on the ground?

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Why do doctors leave the

room while you change?

They're going to see

you naked anyway.

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Why is "bra" singular

and "panties" plural?

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Why do toasters always have a

setting that burns the toast to a

horrible crisp, which no decent

human being would eat?

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If Jimmy cracks corn and

no one cares, why is there

a stupid song about him?

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Can a hearse carrying a corpse

drive in the carpool lane ?

**************************

If the professor on Gilligan's

Island can make a radio out

ofa coconut, why can't he fix

a hole in a boat?

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Why does Goofy stand erect

while Pluto remains on all

fours? they're both dogs!

**************************

If Wile E. Coyote had enough

money to buy all that ACME crap,

why didn't he just buy dinner?

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If corn oil is made from corn,

and vegetable oil is made

from vegetables, what is

baby oil made from?

**************************

If electricity comes from electrons,

does morality come from morons?

**************************

Do the Alphabet song and

Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star

have the same tune?

**************************

Why did you just try singing

the two songs above?

**************************

Why do they call it an asteroid when

it's outside the hemisphere, but call it

a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?

**************************

Did you ever notice that

when you blow in a dog's face,

he gets mad at you, but when

you take him for a car ride, he

sticks his head out the window?

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