Guest guest Posted May 28, 2005 Report Share Posted May 28, 2005 Joanne. When graduated from high school I tired to give him a college experience so he went to a 2 yr community college 1/2 away and we had him stay there in the dorm. I wanted him to have as much "normal time" as possible. Un fortunately that was also when he took his downward spiral so missed more than he went and eventually had to quit altogether in January. I wanted him to go back to the same school and at least repeat the classes in flunked. That way the grades would disappear from his record and he could show 4 yr colleges what he is capable of. I think he considers it a defeat to go there so he won't even consider it. He probably will go to the community college that is right here in town. I think even if he takes the same classes that the failed courses won't be erased at a different school but I am not going to fight him. I thought he would only want to go for 1 semester and than try to transfer somewhere but he is realistic in that he is aware that by the time he has to apply he won't have grades to show anyone cause the semester won't be over so he says he will go for a yr. That makes me feels better. All of his best friends that are now home from college did not drink in high school but take it up as a hobby in college and that get ripped alot now. feels like odd man out. He also was a smoker before the tx and had to give that up. Not being a smoker or drinker my self it is easy to say don't do it but that peer pressure thing now that he feels the best he has in his life is a challenge. I considered talking to his friends about not drinking in front of him or telling him not to drink but I know they would tell him I talked to them and get pissed. It is hard being a mom of an average kid even without these special issues! It is so great to know there are people out there who can understand. All my friends can say they understand but lets face, til you've been there no one knows. God Bless Marti jsgrieme wrote: Hi Marti,My son also missed alot of his high school career. His entire senior year he was either in the hospital or too sick to attend school and then the transplants. Fortunately he was able to graduate with his classmates because of the wonderful tutors that the school district sent to our home. At the time all of his friends were getting their acceptance letters to colleges, Todd was fighting for his life and college was not on our minds. After he was well on his way to recovery he decided he wanted to go away to school like everyone else. It scared me to death to let him go. He chose a community college close to where his brother was attending a 4 yr university. He left 8 months after his 2 transplants...1000 miles away. His grades were not great in high school...understandable, but excelled as a freshman in college. I honestly feel that the 2 year school was the best thing for him. Of course I wanted him to have the true college freshman experience...but looking back I think it would have been very difficult for him to avoid all the drinking and partying that is done by freshmen on campus. Things will always be different for our sons and normal just has a different meaning. Their normal is so much more appreciative of life...living and enjoying life without the use of alcohol or drugs (at least the ones that are not prescribed to them . That to me is a GREAT normal! Afterall, what really is normal? I remember Todd asking his transplant surgeon before he went off to college, "Will I ever be able to have a beer?" The surgeon's answer was, "No! If you ever want to have a beer, just look at your scar and remember how far you have come and how much you had to fight for your life to get to this point...it will remind you that it isn't worth it."I am so happy that you and your son are doing so well only 2 months post transplant. It really is great news.Take care,Joanne (mom of Todd, 19, psc 12/01, crohns 1/02, tx twice 12/03 and living life to the fullest in 05)I have talked to him til I am blue in the face but it still makes him sad that he is not "normal" and never will be.> Marti __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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