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Hi Mike,

That sounds like me 20 years ago. I would hate to give any other advice

than to have her seek profesional help. My personal exploration into this

has lead me to believe that I was either PTSD/BPD OR CPTSD Lots of

information on the web about both, but remember that it take a profesional

many sessions to diagnose either and often they are wrong with the

diagnosis. One good site I found on BPD is

here:http://www.palace.net/~llama/psych/bpd.html but please be very careful

with your evaluation.

Mike M

At 12:41 PM 01/09/2000 -0800, you wrote:

>my girlfriend's sister seems to be having some sort of

>nervous breakdown....she has gone through a divorce,

>lost her job, has tried anti-depressents, and

>counceling, has a lot of guilt and anger it seems

>about the past...she is basically non-functional,

>delusional, and might be suicidal.....her family wants

>some sort of action, and she seems to realize that she

>needs help, but I am afraid that she is going to be

>thrown into some sort of psychiatric hell hole, with

>the whole labeling (which I believe can damage a

>person even more, giving them a permanent label) and

>long-term dependence on pills and medication....sorry

>if this is not too coherent, but if anybody has any

>web sites. personal experiences, or any other

>information, please let me know asap!

>

>Thanks

>

>Mike

>

>

>

>__________________________________________________

>

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Dear Mike;

A diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder is almost as nice as

a death sentence. I'm 61, with lung cancer that's likely terminal

and I wouldn't trade to be a healthy 25 yr old Borderliner ( I am

having difficulty with my vision so please try to read through the

typo's I fail to Correct) Borderliners are neither sane nor insane,

thus extremely diffucult to treat. The ones I've known of do not

show the overt signs of trouble your friend does. Usually they are

quite superior acting and believe they have it all togrther.Their

interpersonal relationships ALWAYS fail and it is always the other

ridiculous person's fault. If they cannot take over a group or draw

the most attention, they will leave in high dugeon at everyone's

stupidity. I am speaking of untreated borderliners of which most

are. Borderliners seldom seek therapy, because the shrinks are

so far beneath them and really could have no knowlege of their

condition from their view. It gets worse. They usually create chaos

between other people, while they watch friends fall apart and fight.

I have a psychologist friend who told me it usually takes two years

in therapy to get one true personal fact from a borderliner and any

progress is phenomonal. It just takes that long to establish a

rapport, not that borderliners are evil, but that they are afraid. Fear

beyond our wildest imaginings.

The true BPD is unusual almost rare. Be extremely careful with

this judgement

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Hi ,

From what I have read on the subject is exactly what you say in regaurd

to the true Borderline. Most of whome are cutters. It is also noted in what

I have read that it is the most mis diagnosed disorder, because having 5 of

the 9 criteria without being a cutter you can be classed as borderline. I

noted that the sites with the CPTSD have very similar criteria and it is

suggested that if the person is not a cutter that it is more than likely to

be PTSD than the Borderline. If a Borderline makes it to thier late 30's

the syptoms decrease with age in most cases. Not a very great statement to

comfort the patient. It seems that no one has come up with a criteria to

properly diagnos this properly and until one is developed it is done with

great caution. Any true BPD's that do make it to therapy usually quit

withing the first 6 months of treatement.I personally met with most of the

criteria without the cutting and it still makes more sence to me that it is

PTSD. I also had the steady stream of negative thoughts that accompany BPD,

but that can also be found in other disorders as well. Like I said, only

someone qualified should be making any form of diagnosis. The best thing

for anyone is to seek professional help. There are many possable things

this woman can be going through and I don't believe anyone here is really

qualified to diagnos her. I'm glad that you followed through with this

and questioned what was written. This could become a very serious and

deadly game if we start playing doctor on here. We are human and we like to

help, but lets leave some things up to the professionals.

Mike M

At 08:38 PM 01/09/2000 -0600, you wrote:

>Dear Mike;

>

>A diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder is almost as nice as

>a death sentence. I'm 61, with lung cancer that's likely terminal

>and I wouldn't trade to be a healthy 25 yr old Borderliner ( I am

>having difficulty with my vision so please try to read through the

>typo's I fail to Correct) Borderliners are neither sane nor insane,

>thus extremely diffucult to treat. The ones I've known of do not

>show the overt signs of trouble your friend does. Usually they are

>quite superior acting and believe they have it all togrther.Their

>interpersonal relationships ALWAYS fail and it is always the other

>ridiculous person's fault. If they cannot take over a group or draw

>the most attention, they will leave in high dugeon at everyone's

>stupidity. I am speaking of untreated borderliners of which most

>are. Borderliners seldom seek therapy, because the shrinks are

>so far beneath them and really could have no knowlege of their

>condition from their view. It gets worse. They usually create chaos

>between other people, while they watch friends fall apart and fight.

>I have a psychologist friend who told me it usually takes two years

>in therapy to get one true personal fact from a borderliner and any

>progress is phenomonal. It just takes that long to establish a

>rapport, not that borderliners are evil, but that they are afraid. Fear

>beyond our wildest imaginings.

>

>The true BPD is unusual almost rare. Be extremely careful with

>this judgement

>

>

>

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weel I sure hope that she doesn't have a borderline

personality...it seems like she has just gone through

a long stressful period, and just can't cope anymore

with it...maybe I am panicking a bit and trying to

find something to do, I don't know..I am going to stay

away from the situation today, and let my mind rest..i

know her family is getting her some help.it just

scared me to death some of the stuff she said to

me...thanks for replying.

--- Mike May wrote:

>

> Hi ,

> From what I have read on the subject is exactly

> what you say in regaurd

> to the true Borderline. Most of whome are cutters.

> It is also noted in what

> I have read that it is the most mis diagnosed

> disorder, because having 5 of

> the 9 criteria without being a cutter you can be

> classed as borderline. I

> noted that the sites with the CPTSD have very

> similar criteria and it is

> suggested that if the person is not a cutter that it

> is more than likely to

> be PTSD than the Borderline. If a Borderline makes

> it to thier late 30's

> the syptoms decrease with age in most cases. Not a

> very great statement to

> comfort the patient. It seems that no one has come

> up with a criteria to

> properly diagnos this properly and until one is

> developed it is done with

> great caution. Any true BPD's that do make it to

> therapy usually quit

> withing the first 6 months of treatement.I

> personally met with most of the

> criteria without the cutting and it still makes more

> sence to me that it is

> PTSD. I also had the steady stream of negative

> thoughts that accompany BPD,

> but that can also be found in other disorders as

> well. Like I said, only

> someone qualified should be making any form of

> diagnosis. The best thing

> for anyone is to seek professional help. There are

> many possable things

> this woman can be going through and I don't believe

> anyone here is really

> qualified to diagnos her. I'm glad that you followed

> through with this

> and questioned what was written. This could become a

> very serious and

> deadly game if we start playing doctor on here. We

> are human and we like to

> help, but lets leave some things up to the

> professionals.

> Mike M

> At 08:38 PM 01/09/2000 -0600, you wrote:

> >Dear Mike;

> >

> >A diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder is

> almost as nice as

> >a death sentence. I'm 61, with lung cancer that's

> likely terminal

> >and I wouldn't trade to be a healthy 25 yr old

> Borderliner ( I am

> >having difficulty with my vision so please try to

> read through the

> >typo's I fail to Correct) Borderliners are neither

> sane nor insane,

> >thus extremely diffucult to treat. The ones I've

> known of do not

> >show the overt signs of trouble your friend does.

> Usually they are

> >quite superior acting and believe they have it all

> togrther.Their

> >interpersonal relationships ALWAYS fail and it is

> always the other

> >ridiculous person's fault. If they cannot take

> over a group or draw

> >the most attention, they will leave in high dugeon

> at everyone's

> >stupidity. I am speaking of untreated borderliners

> of which most

> >are. Borderliners seldom seek therapy, because the

> shrinks are

> >so far beneath them and really could have no

> knowlege of their

> >condition from their view. It gets worse. They

> usually create chaos

> >between other people, while they watch friends fall

> apart and fight.

> >I have a psychologist friend who told me it usually

> takes two years

> >in therapy to get one true personal fact from a

> borderliner and any

> >progress is phenomonal. It just takes that long to

> establish a

> >rapport, not that borderliners are evil, but that

> they are afraid. Fear

> >beyond our wildest imaginings.

> >

> >The true BPD is unusual almost rare. Be extremely

> careful with

> >this judgement

> >

> >

> >

>

>------------------------------------------------------------------------

> >Want to send money instantly to anyone, anywhere,

> anytime?

> >You can today at X.com - and we'll give you $20 to

> try it! Sign

> >up today at X.com. It's quick, free, & there's no

> obligation!

>

>http://click./1/332/1/_/4324/_/947471862/

> >

> >-- Easily schedule meetings and events using the

> group calendar!

> >--

> /cal?listname=12-step-free & m=1

> >

> >

> >

>

>

>

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Hello

I am so sorry to hear that you definitely have cancer and that it is

probably terminal. I do hope that it is not.

I think your description is more accurately of narcissistic personality

rather than borderline. They often co-exist, but do not necessarily.

Borderlines are in fact guru chasers who are always running from guru

to guru, quite often therapists. They are also often hospitalized for

suicidal or self-injuring behavior a nd enter te psych systen that

way. Therapists (and lovers etc) are often idealized in very glowing

terms, then vilified when they fail to deliver the unconditional love

that nobody can actually give another person.

Again, most of what you say is actually a description of narcissists

not borderlines, and though many borderlines are also narcissists, many

are not.

I have a support/discussion list for personality disorders, will post

info if anyone interested - tho it has dwindled to a

support-pete-in-his-dysfunctional-relationship list at the moment.

Pete

" gary d hall " wrote:

original article:/group/12-step-free/?start=11412

> Dear Mike;

>

> A diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder is almost as nice as

> a death sentence. I'm 61, with lung cancer that's likely terminal

> and I wouldn't trade to be a healthy 25 yr old Borderliner ( I am

> having difficulty with my vision so please try to read through the

> typo's I fail to Correct) Borderliners are neither sane nor insane,

> thus extremely diffucult to treat. The ones I've known of do not

> show the overt signs of trouble your friend does. Usually they are

> quite superior acting and believe they have it all togrther.Their

> interpersonal relationships ALWAYS fail and it is always the other

> ridiculous person's fault. If they cannot take over a group or draw

> the most attention, they will leave in high dugeon at everyone's

> stupidity. I am speaking of untreated borderliners of which most

> are. Borderliners seldom seek therapy, because the shrinks are

> so far beneath them and really could have no knowlege of their

> condition from their view. It gets worse. They usually create chaos

> between other people, while they watch friends fall apart and fight.

> I have a psychologist friend who told me it usually takes two years

> in therapy to get one true personal fact from a borderliner and any

> progress is phenomonal. It just takes that long to establish a

> rapport, not that borderliners are evil, but that they are afraid.

Fear

> beyond our wildest imaginings.

>

> The true BPD is unusual almost rare. Be extremely careful with

> this judgement

>

>

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well, she did try to admit herself, into a psychiatric

hospital here in Fort Wayne ,but since she doesn't

seem to fit into any catagory at this point, and since

they were short on space, they put her in a padded

room, and she had the smarts to check herself out

asap...

She does have family support, but they want to commit

her to a hospital in Chicago, and I am afraid that she

is going to be labeled as something (manic-depressive,

major depression, etc.), and given medication. I am

very skeptical of this approach so I am trying to

find a non disease approach therapist or hospital in

the Indiana area...I've been through the psychiatric

hell-hole routine, with the labeling, medication, etc,

and I would like to see her avoid this if at all

possible...thank you for your feedback.

--- Mike May wrote:

>

> Hi Mike,

> I'm really happy to hear that your friend is

> getting some help. But what

> is nicer is the fact that she is getting family

> support and the support of

> a good friend. Thank God she's not throwing a buck

> in the basket and being

> told to go and abuse herself more.

> Mike M

> At 07:46 AM 01/10/2000 -0800, you wrote:

> >weel I sure hope that she doesn't have a borderline

> >personality...it seems like she has just gone

> through

> >a long stressful period, and just can't cope

> anymore

> >with it...maybe I am panicking a bit and trying to

> >find something to do, I don't know..I am going to

> stay

> >away from the situation today, and let my mind

> rest..i

> >know her family is getting her some help.it just

> >scared me to death some of the stuff she said to

> >me...thanks for replying.

>

>

>

>

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Hi Mike,

I'm really happy to hear that your friend is getting some help. But what

is nicer is the fact that she is getting family support and the support of

a good friend. Thank God she's not throwing a buck in the basket and being

told to go and abuse herself more.

Mike M

At 07:46 AM 01/10/2000 -0800, you wrote:

>weel I sure hope that she doesn't have a borderline

>personality...it seems like she has just gone through

>a long stressful period, and just can't cope anymore

>with it...maybe I am panicking a bit and trying to

>find something to do, I don't know..I am going to stay

>away from the situation today, and let my mind rest..i

>know her family is getting her some help.it just

>scared me to death some of the stuff she said to

>me...thanks for replying.

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Hi Mike'

Been throught the meds myself for depression. Can't say I blame you

there. How the hell do they expect you to think. Kind of like getting eye

drops before an eye exam, ever figure that one out?

Mike M

At 04:25 PM 01/11/2000 -0800, you wrote:

>well, she did try to admit herself, into a psychiatric

>hospital here in Fort Wayne ,but since she doesn't

>seem to fit into any catagory at this point, and since

>they were short on space, they put her in a padded

>room, and she had the smarts to check herself out

>asap...

>

>She does have family support, but they want to commit

>her to a hospital in Chicago, and I am afraid that she

>is going to be labeled as something (manic-depressive,

>major depression, etc.), and given medication. I am

>very skeptical of this approach so I am trying to

>find a non disease approach therapist or hospital in

>the Indiana area...I've been through the psychiatric

>hell-hole routine, with the labeling, medication, etc,

>and I would like to see her avoid this if at all

>possible...thank you for your feedback.

>

>--- Mike May wrote:

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