help- I'm tired of this :(

[Guest guest]

swinging at the end of my rope again- I'm just SO tired of not being able to understand or trust my body

Now- I know I had a completely normal HSG 4 weeks ago- no scarring - NOTHING- but I'm having pain and no AF- and WHY!?- for about 4 days I was up at night with cramps- figured AF was coming on (CD 33 - and last time my cycle was 32 days)

Now that pain is subsiding- but No AF- I suppose I shouldn't worry- but I feel like this is still controling my life- adn it's supposed to be "over"- we're not TTC right now- so why am I so consumed with worries- probably PTSD- anyone else with psychological issues about AF after all was said and done- AND - anyone else with all the pain I'm experiencing- I figured it was healing from so much surgery (adhesions, septum and endo removed)- but I've never had pain like this before AS- and I'm "cured"- so why do I feel like I'm not cured yet!?

Sorry to babble- just typing this made me feel better- before you ask I did take a pg test- not that it was too likely- but it was neg. I am back on track with the adoption- and I don't want to be pg at all right now- would be too scared to go to Cambodia pg- someone please say prayers for my sanity LOL! Thanks for listening!

"I know God won't give me anything I can't handle, I just wish he didn't trust me so much"

-Mother

, Mike, Brenna (VSD, PS- open heart surgery 1/29/98--- typical 3 1/2YO- YIPES!), Baby Angel born too early 11/7/00, and Riley and Snoozer the dogs

Join us again next year in remembering the millions of people affected by CHD on 2/14/2002: "A Day for Hearts: Congenital Heart Defects Awareness Day!"