Re: New And Trying To Learn To Cope

[Guest guest]

" How do you keep going when every days is hell and there is only

slight hope of recovery. How do you carry the disability and keep

going. "

,

I tell myself one minute at at time when things are at their

worst, and also will tell myself just get through this (like going up my 2

flights of stairs while my pain is a 9) and tomorrow I do not

have to go down.

Mentally I have been having trouble dealing with the pain, the future of pain

like when it is late at night and I have got to go up the stairs. I have been in

pain so long, emotionally it is hard to keep it together.

But one minute at a time. I hold on to hope that I will find a medicine,

supplement, therapy that will get my pain down to a 5 at least and can start

doing the things again that the pain has taken away.

Having things to look forward to, indulging in hobbies and other

interest help me survive and stay here another day.

Peace,

[Guest guest]

Sorry to hear about your pain. I have 2 daughters so I do not have a choice but

I must admit if my pains are really bad which at the moment they are they do

help alot, I have got budgies to keep me going as I do not do anything during

the day just sit and watch tele. I have been bad these last couple of days. My

pains have been evil. I think it is the fact that I lost my auntie in August to

cancer so when I get upset my pains decide to take over my body. I think if I

did not have my kids I would not be here as I would rather be in heaven with my

auntie with no pain what so ever. That would be great

x

> R. wrote:

> While I don't have a traditional pain condition, I am in severe pain - mental

and physical.

[Guest guest]

I am glad you have a therapist for help. Seems there should be something that

would ease your anxiety and would not make you suffer side effects. Perhaps a

teaching hospital could be some help in your case. I sure would not give in to

feeling like you do all the time.

Accepting and coping with pain is a process that takes time and there is no set

amount of weeks or months. Talking with people who also suffer pain and mental

pain too helps. I did not believe it would till I attended group therapy for

pain and another group for depression. After nearly 2 years I started to get

hold of things and see everything with a clearer perspective. I have not given

up

trying to keep on top of the pain and recognizing my moods for what they are. I

am not my mood.

Coping skills are different for everyone but the basic thing is to master your

mindset. To be able to calm yourself whether it is meditation, yoga, or

visiting a peaceful place with your eyes closed to everything around you in the

" real " world.

I know the ups and downs and no day is perfect but I can stop myself from going

to that dark and negative place because I can see it coming.

I will never be " healed " like new, but finding a way to live with the " new me "

when changes happen is my goal.

Jennette

> R. wrote:

> How do you keep going when every days is hell and there is only slight hope of

recovery. How do you carry the disability and keep going.

[Guest guest]

,

Let me echo what said: one minute at a time. And if that does not work,

then one breath at a time.

Do not isolate yourself. Your therapist was right to suggest you look for an

on-line support group. Look for more groups. There are many. That will give

you a good base to use to get more feedback and support.

Look for groups that deal with things other than your physical and mental

symptoms. They can help distract from the pain. Ever thought about tying flies

for fly fishing? Interested in space exploration? Want to learn Chinese? Want

to talk about CSI? How about marathons? Whatever it is you might find

interesting there is sure to be a group out there that is discussing it.

Remember that your pain is not who you are. It is simply a condition of your

current life. Maybe it will be with you for a long time or maybe it will go

away on its own or due to some treatment, supplement or therapy. But you cannot

let it define you.

I am just now coming to terms with my chronic pain. And trying to figure out

how I can lead a meaningful life despite the pain. That is an individual

journey. Many people on this list are living fulling lives, doing what they can

within their limitations, and are happy. Their joy and compassion shows in

their posts.

Above all, despite how it feels, you are not alone. Unfortunately, chronic pain

is an epidemic. There are thousands of us, maybe hundreds of thousands of us.

Hang in there,

[Guest guest]

Dear Sweet Brother,

I have been in pain most of my life Just got worse over the years. No one

knew for a long time what was causing it. I was going deeper and deeper in that

black hole called depression.

My Great Grandmother taught me about herbs and many other things.

It led to me becoming a Wiccan, like my grandmothers and great

grandmothers before me. I learned how to meditate and found that

did it help with the depression and helped me to control the pain.

Since I became severely disabled with many different pain syndromes, bone spurs,

arthritis and severe nerve damage in my biceps, feet, thighs, and back. I was

stuck in a wheelchair for over 18 months.

Going through a really bad divorce (really bad, my lawyer now uses it as his

worst case scenario )for 3 years, raising 4 boys ( I got sole custody ), and a

new husband was very hard, when my body gave out.

I couldn't use my legs. I went into a deep depression. This time around I went

to many doctors until finally one knew what they were and most of the causes. I

had to go to councilors and be put on two anti-depressants along with 15 other

drugs.

It was hard for me to accept that my body would no longer allow me

to work, and that I had to be put on all these different drugs. I still use my

teas, herbal baths and incenses to help.

My hubby is the sweetest man on earth and surprised the hell out of me. He took

over but ran the house the way I did. My sons call

him Dad although he isn't. He never asked them to. They were calling him by his

name then it turned into Dad.

What I am trying to say and going the long way around is you need to believe in

yourself. Meditate, sing out loud, read a book, Do what ever makes you feel

good.

We get caught up in our pain. Then you get depressed about the stuff you can't

do. Instead Do what you can and make sure you do at least one thing that makes

you feel good and enjoy what you can do.

Gentle hugs,

Ms.Katurah

> R. wrote:

> While I don't have a traditional pain condition, I am in severe pain - mental

and physical.