Aarggh! I can't sleep! Help please!

[Guest guest]

Could any of you mommies help me out here? I'm having a little

meltdown.

As many of you know, got a DOC Band late, at 17 1/2 mos. The

folks at CT were just wonderful and rushed his band, and he had some

good growth during his time in the band.

His numbers measure normal now. In fact, I am stunned by how much

correction he got at his age. I wasn't expecting such good results.

He looks basically normal now. Before he got the band he was starting

to look weird. By weird I mean that if you looked at him for a while,

you got the feeling that maybe he was developmentally delayed even

though he obviously wasn't. There was a cognitive dissonance when you

looked at him. He had that odd smashed look that a lot of delayed

kids have but was bright and active.... Am I making sense? Anyway,

now he doesn't look like playdough.

However, he still has asymmetry! It doesn't show up in the standard

measurements, but it's pretty obvious. One eye is still significantly

smaller than the other and a different shape. He also has that wonky

hairline I keep mentioning. Today I took a Magic Marker and drew a

line right over each eyebrow, and then a line directly above at his

hairline. One side is half an inch different from the other! That's a

pretty big number for such a little guy, and it will only look more

noticeable as he grows. The same goes for his eye asymmetry. I am

pretty concerned about his vision because of it. I don't see how he

could see straight with his eyes like that.

Somebody please chill me out! When I look at this beautiful boy I

keep focusing on the asymmetry and his hairline and not that little

grin. Worst of all, I think he is aware of my scrutiny. He wouldn't

let me take pictures today, and yesterday I was explaining something

about his hairline to my mom and he put his hands over his face to

hide. So now I'm not only making myself crazy, I am freaking out my

little guy!

Up until now I haven't cared about the remaining asymmetry. I have

just been so happy that he got the correction he did! Goodness knows

what he would look like if he hadn't had the band, and pre-band he

looked cross-eyed in the smaller eye. But the remaining asymmetry is

not insignificant and I seem to be starting to obsess over it.

Somebody give me a kick in the patootie and tell me to count my

blessings!

I am going to bed and maybe I will not be so crazy in the morning. If

anyone has any words of advice, spill 'em!

, 22 mos, DOC Grad 9/7