Guest guest Posted February 10, 2008 Report Share Posted February 10, 2008 Anne~ After waking up, only to realize that I have caught hubby's cold, this is just what I needed to put a smile on my face. Wish there was an anecdote for people who sneeze and cough without covering their mouths...) Love and blessings... ValAnne Whitworth wrote: Thanks to my cousin Wanda's husband for this treat. AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES 1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself. 2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop. 3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. About lifting the toilet seat by using the shower. 4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer. 5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button. 6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough. 7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape. 8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKYS. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS. Love and blessings... Val <*)))>< Euphemisms are unpleasant truths wearing diplomatic cologne. ~Quentin Crisp~ Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 10, 2008 Report Share Posted February 10, 2008 Note: forwarded message attached. Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage. Anne~ After waking up, only to realize that I have caught hubby's cold, this is just what I needed to put a smile on my face. Wish there was an anecdote for people who sneeze and cough without covering their mouths...) Love and blessings... ValAnne Whitworth <reikiladyitlnet (DOT) net> wrote: Thanks to my cousin Wanda's husband for this treat. AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES 1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself. 2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop. 3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. About lifting the toilet seat by using the shower. 4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer. 5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button. 6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough. 7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape. 8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKYS. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS. Love and blessings... Val <*)))>< Euphemisms are unpleasant truths wearing diplomatic cologne. ~Quentin Crisp~ Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 10, 2008 Report Share Posted February 10, 2008 duct tape? -- Re: Simple Home Remedies-funny Anne~ After waking up, only to realize that I have caught hubby's cold, this is just what I needed to put a smile on my face. Wish there was an anecdote for people who sneeze and cough without covering their mouths...) Love and blessings... ValAnne Whitworth <reikiladyitlnet (DOT) net> wrote: Thanks to my cousin Wanda's husband for this treat. AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES 1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself. 2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop. 3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. About lifting the toilet seat by using the shower. 4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer. 5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button. 6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough. 7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape. 8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKYS. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS. Love and blessings... Val <*)))>< Euphemisms are unpleasant truths wearing diplomatic cologne. ~Quentin Crisp~ Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 10, 2008 Report Share Posted February 10, 2008 LOL...If I had read a little bit closer, I would have found the remedy in the post, huh? Goofy me. I feel like one of those people in a Nyquil commercial. Runny nose, coughing, sneezing, watery eyes, chills, aches, pains, congestion, fever.....Wish I had a great big bathtub. I'd go take me the hottest bath I could stand right now. 'Course, if I did that, it would take some work getting back out. Love and blessings.... Val Akiba wrote: duct tape? -- Re: Simple Home Remedies-funny Anne~ After waking up, only to realize that I have caught hubby's cold, this is just what I needed to put a smile on my face. Wish there was an anecdote for people who sneeze and cough without covering their mouths...) Love and blessings... ValAnne Whitworth <reikiladyitlnet (DOT) net> wrote: Thanks to my cousin Wanda's husband for this treat. AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES 1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself. 2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop. 3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. About lifting the toilet seat by using the shower. 4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer. 5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button. 6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough. 7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape. 8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKYS. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS. Love and blessings... Val <*)))>< Euphemisms are unpleasant truths wearing diplomatic cologne. ~Quentin Crisp~ Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. Love and blessings... Val <*)))>< Euphemisms are unpleasant truths wearing diplomatic cologne. ~Quentin Crisp~ Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 10, 2008 Report Share Posted February 10, 2008 gags in the mouth - works for me Re: Simple Home Remedies-funny Anne~ After waking up, only to realize that I have caught hubby's cold, this is just what I needed to put a smile on my face. Wish there was an anecdote for people who sneeze and cough without covering their mouths...) Love and blessings... ValAnne Whitworth <reikiladyitlnet (DOT) net> wrote: Thanks to my cousin Wanda's husband for this treat. AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES 1. If you are choking on an ice cub! e simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself. 2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop. 3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. About lifting the toilet seat by using the shower. 4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer. 5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button. 6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough. 7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape. 8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKYS. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS. Love and blessings... Val <*)))>< Euphemisms are unpleasant truths wearing diplomatic cologne. ~Quentin Crisp~ Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. No virus found in this incoming message.Checked by AVG Free Edition. Version: 7.5.516 / Virus Database: 269.19.21/1265 - Release Date: 2/7/2008 11:17 AM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 10, 2008 Report Share Posted February 10, 2008 Good ones! Thanks for the chuckles, Anne.hugs))Sharon This email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. ----- Original Message ----To: MSersLife egroup <MSersLife > Thanks to my cousin Wanda's husband for this treat. AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES 1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself. 2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop. 3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. About lifting the toilet seat by using the shower. 4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer. 5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button. 6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough. 7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape. 8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKYS. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS. Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 12, 2008 Report Share Posted February 12, 2008 ROFLMHO Anne a few of these are new to me. I love the last bit, Re: Slinkies. LMHO Challis ----- Original Message ----From: Anne Whitworth reikilady@... Thanks to my cousin Wanda's husband for this treat. AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES 1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself. 2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop. 3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. About lifting the toilet seat by using the shower. 4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer. 5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button. 6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough. 7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape. 8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKYS. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS. Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 12, 2008 Report Share Posted February 12, 2008 Try the laxative. ROFL I hope you're feeling better, Val. Challis Re: Simple Home Remedies-funny Anne~ After waking up, only to realize that I have caught hubby's cold, this is just what I needed to put a smile on my face. Wish there was an anecdote for people who sneeze and cough without covering their mouths...) Love and blessings... ValAnne Whitworth <reikiladyitlnet (DOT) net> wrote: Thanks to my cousin Wanda's husband for this treat. AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES 1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself. 2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop. 3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. About lifting the toilet seat by using the shower. 4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer. 5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button. 6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough. 7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape. 8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKYS. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS. Love and blessings... Val <*)))>< Euphemisms are unpleasant truths wearing diplomatic cologne. ~Quentin Crisp~ Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 12, 2008 Report Share Posted February 12, 2008 Similar minds. Different ends. LOL Challis Re: Simple Home Remedies-funny Anne~ After waking up, only to realize that I have caught hubby's cold, this is just what I needed to put a smile on my face. Wish there was an anecdote for people who sneeze and cough without covering their mouths...) Love and blessings... ValAnne Whitworth <reikiladyitlnet (DOT) net> wrote: Thanks to my cousin Wanda's husband for this treat. AMAZINGLY SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES 1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself. 2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop. 3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. About lifting the toilet seat by using the shower. 4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer. 5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button. 6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough. 7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape. 8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKYS. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS. Love and blessings... Val <*)))>< Euphemisms are unpleasant truths wearing diplomatic cologne. ~Quentin Crisp~ Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. Looking for last minute shopping deals? Find them fast with Yahoo! Search. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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