Re: Carol----A Question???????

[Guest guest]

Carol

Everyone talks about how mush the bps are " hurting " . Do they know they are

hurting? And if this is the case, why don't they just say' I am hurting and

I don't know why. Why don't they ask for help from us or someone else who

cares a bout them.

I didn't see my daughter trying to get help in our joint counseling session

with that nitwit Christian counselor who didn't have a clue about bp. It was

just more of the same bull about how I was overprotective when she was 18,

etc etc. Beating a deadhorse as usual. I could have compassion for my

daughter if she admitted to feeling bad about anything. But personally I think

my

daughter is more Narcissistic and Sociopath than BP. Her delight in beatring

the system and fraud and encircling herself with the criminal element makes

me feel nothing but contempt for her.

She has never been obviously depressed except when she needs more money.

She has never self mutilated or tried to kill herslf. She just likes to hang

out with and marry and procreate with trash. She loves to thumb her nose at

all my values----pure and simple. My son to this day is happy when I am proud

of his accomplishmnets. She was academically smarter than him till she

started rebelling, but she chooses to do nothing with her brain but take out

credit cards in other peoples' names, run up utility bills in my aekderly

aunt's

name and in her own children's names, then doesn't pay them and ruins their

credit. SHe says the bad credit will drop off their credit file by the time

they are 18 and need to apply for financial aid for college---I hope so. She

just loves staying one step ahead of the law. Is this BP behavior or

something else?

So, NO, I have no compassion for her. She needs a good lesson in

consequences. I hope like Carolyn always says that LIFE will teach it to her.

Jean

[Guest guest]

Hope I wasn't too hard on you on my last response. Don't mean to be -- it's

just that it's important to distance yourself emotionally from the actions and

words of a BP. They are illogical!

I will try to tackle your questions:

I think some BPs do know they're hurting but they don't grasp that it isn't ok

and that others don't feel this way. They are in denial. They don't believe

there is anything wrong with them. Some who see the light, because they have

fallen so low they cannot get back up, or feel so badly , get help. Others do

it in their own way. Just my opinion.

I believe you daughter, like mine, hang out with the crowd they're with because

they have such low self-esteeem. Again, counseling might help. But if you

really don't want help and don't make changes, it won't work.

As far as running up the bills and lies, it is a common bp trait and also

manic/depressive behavior.

BPs do have high risk behaviors. I don't think they can answer why. One of my

daughters friends asked her why if she knows she's going to get in trouble does

she do the things she does? She cannot tell you. I don't think she really does

want to be in these binds, over her head. But then I don't think their minds

can really go there -- and work through the pain, because then they would be

terribly depressed. I don't think they see a light over the tunnel. I'm not

sure.

I do feel very compassionate towards my daughter, and perhaps your own.

That doesn't mean I need to be emotionally attached or used, but my heart bleeds

for her because it's not the life I want for her. I had to give up my dreams

and expectations for her well being a long time ago. I still pray things will

get better for her and my granddaughter.

If we observe them and do not facilitiate, they definitely see life's

consequences. Unfortunately, they make life very hard for themselves and get a

lot of life's knocks.

Carol

-------------- Original message --------------

> Carol

>

> Everyone talks about how mush the bps are " hurting " . Do they know they are

> hurting? And if this is the case, why don't they just say' I am hurting and

> I don't know why. Why don't they ask for help from us or someone else who

> cares a bout them.

>

> I didn't see my daughter trying to get help in our joint counseling session

> with that nitwit Christian counselor who didn't have a clue about bp. It was

> just more of the same bull about how I was overprotective when she was 18,

> etc etc. Beating a deadhorse as usual. I could have compassion for my

> daughter if she admitted to feeling bad about anything. But personally I think

> my

> daughter is more Narcissistic and Sociopath than BP. Her delight in beatring

> the system and fraud and encircling herself with the criminal element makes

> me feel nothing but contempt for her.

>

> She has never been obviously depressed except when she needs more money.

> She has never self mutilated or tried to kill herslf. She just likes to hang

> out with and marry and procreate with trash. She loves to thumb her nose at

> all my values----pure and simple. My son to this day is happy when I am proud

> of his accomplishmnets. She was academically smarter than him till she

> started rebelling, but she chooses to do nothing with her brain but take out

> credit cards in other peoples' names, run up utility bills in my aekderly

> aunt's

> name and in her own children's names, then doesn't pay them and ruins their

> credit. SHe says the bad credit will drop off their credit file by the time

> they are 18 and need to apply for financial aid for college---I hope so. She

> just loves staying one step ahead of the law. Is this BP behavior or

> something else?

>

> So, NO, I have no compassion for her. She needs a good lesson in

> consequences. I hope like Carolyn always says that LIFE will teach it to her.

>

> Jean

>

>

>