Thiotimoline

April 4, 2004

By Sweetwind, Section News

Posted on Thu Apr 1st, 2004 at 02:43:57 AM PST

The Journal of Endochronic Endocrinology debuts its maiden issue today. The

field of endochronic endocrinology began with a bang this year when an

endocrinologist for the first time tried resublimated thiotimoline in the

treatment of chronic hypothyroidism. Thiotimoline is an odd molecule, the

simplest example of a class of endochronic substances in which one chemical

bond is so pressurized that it is distorted through the temporal dimension

into the future. This warped bond is what gives thiotimoline the property,

first described in 1948 by graduate student I. Azimuth, of dissolving 1.12

seconds before being added to water.

Thiotimoline has already lead to at least one commercial application, but

had never before been used in medicine. Although in vitro experiments did

not prove promising, 28-year-old University of Edinburgh-based

endocrinologist Hootie Gable began a clinical study this year. In this

double-blind experiment, resublimated thiotimoline proved astonishingly

effective in the treatment of hypothyroidism. Gable theorizes that

thiotimoline binds to the iodine atoms in T3, the peripherally generated,

biologically active version of thyroid hormone. Thiotimoline temporally

smears " the T3 molecule into the future, causing it to remain active in the

body after it has already broken down. Since the biological half-life of T3

is rather short, this smearing effect seems to synergistically boost the

hormone's potency.

Late October of 2004, when the Society of Endochronic Endocrinology was

founded as a special interest group of the American Chronochemical Society,

they decided to salute the breakthrough by publishing the first edition of

the Journal today, approximately six months before Gable's results become

available. Publisher Cass Canteloupe attributed the urgency of launching the

journal to rival claims already popping up in May of 2004, citing precedence

for certain key patents in the process.

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