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HI!! Welcome to the group. I know exactly how you feel about having a hard

time getting referrals. My daughter has several kinds of urticaria and

started when she was 5 months. She is 27 months now and has found relief

with some meds and a very kind and helpful dermatologist at the Cleveland

Clinic. She had A LOT of blood work done recently and I am awaiting the

results. I hope you find the answers you need and just know that this a

wonderful support group and a great place to exchange information or just

vent about unhelpful doctors. Best Wishes~

new member

> Dear all

>

> I am a new member so I thought I would say hello. I am currently on the

listbot

> list but it was suggested I join here to.

>

> Those of you who have already read this can delete now.

>

>

> My itching started around 9 months ago and I have had 9

> months of my doctor refusing to send me to a dermatologist and

> telling me to change my soap, washing powder etc etc. I told

> him numerous times that I was using the same soap I always

> had, the same washing powder I always had and it made

> absolutely no difference at all. The rash was completely random

> and seemed to have no common cause.

>

> Finally I refused to leave until he sent me to a dermatologist

> which appeared to work. I went off to the hospital imagining that

> I was going to be put on various diets, and given allergy tests

> and it would be another six months before anyone agreed what I

> was allergic to. The very nice dermatologist took one look and

> said " classic urticaria " .

>

> It was such a relief. After 8 months of itching I was beginning to

> think it was all in my imagination. The only thing that I can pin it

> down to was it started when I began to take the contraceptive

> pill. My GP, the one who changed my washing powder, told me

> that had nothing to do with it, but I wondered if anyone else had

> had the same experience. (My confidence in my current GP is

> quite low at the moment)

>

> Since then I have been sent for more blood tests and I am wating

> for the results which I should get next week. Except now I am

> armed with the information and will be asking for a copy of the

> results and my file and will know what questions to ask.

>

> Thanks to you all

>

> Shona

>

> --------------------------------

> Shona Haslam

> Parlimentary Officer

> Evangelical Alliance UK

> email: shaslam@...

> --------------------------------

>

> =

>

>

> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

> If you do wish to unsubscribe then you can click on the following link:

> <mailto:urticaria-unsubscribeegroups>

> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>

> This list is in the service of those who suffer from Chronic Urticaria

(hives). We strive to support and lift each other as a worldwide

cyber-family.

>

> We share whatever needs to be shared to help one another in our struggle

with Chronic Urticria.

>

> Any posting that is off the main topic of Chronic Urticaria, we post with

a prefix of NCU -. This is done out of respect for those who do not wish to

read such postings.

>

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Hi Shona!

Welcome to the list!

It's not all in your imagination - and 'fire' your GP, if at all possible!

new member

> Dear all

>

> I am a new member so I thought I would say hello. I am currently on the

listbot

> list but it was suggested I join here to.

>

> Those of you who have already read this can delete now.

>

>

> My itching started around 9 months ago and I have had 9

> months of my doctor refusing to send me to a dermatologist and

> telling me to change my soap, washing powder etc etc. I told

> him numerous times that I was using the same soap I always

> had, the same washing powder I always had and it made

> absolutely no difference at all. The rash was completely random

> and seemed to have no common cause.

>

> Finally I refused to leave until he sent me to a dermatologist

> which appeared to work. I went off to the hospital imagining that

> I was going to be put on various diets, and given allergy tests

> and it would be another six months before anyone agreed what I

> was allergic to. The very nice dermatologist took one look and

> said " classic urticaria " .

>

> It was such a relief. After 8 months of itching I was beginning to

> think it was all in my imagination. The only thing that I can pin it

> down to was it started when I began to take the contraceptive

> pill. My GP, the one who changed my washing powder, told me

> that had nothing to do with it, but I wondered if anyone else had

> had the same experience. (My confidence in my current GP is

> quite low at the moment)

>

> Since then I have been sent for more blood tests and I am wating

> for the results which I should get next week. Except now I am

> armed with the information and will be asking for a copy of the

> results and my file and will know what questions to ask.

>

> Thanks to you all

>

> Shona

>

> --------------------------------

> Shona Haslam

> Parlimentary Officer

> Evangelical Alliance UK

> email: shaslam@...

> --------------------------------

>

> =

>

>

> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

> If you do wish to unsubscribe then you can click on the following link:

> <mailto:urticaria-unsubscribeegroups>

> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

>

> This list is in the service of those who suffer from Chronic Urticaria

(hives). We strive to support and lift each other as a worldwide

cyber-family.

>

> We share whatever needs to be shared to help one another in our struggle

with Chronic Urticria.

>

> Any posting that is off the main topic of Chronic Urticaria, we post with

a prefix of NCU -. This is done out of respect for those who do not wish to

read such postings.

>

>

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  • 4 years later...
Guest guest

Greetings!

My non bp dtr would get SO mad at my bp dtr for helping herself to

things from her room. She'd find them in my bp dtr's room, unwashed

and usually stretched out so my non bp could no longer wear them.

It constantly amazes me how bp kids can deny the truth when it so

not just obvious, but the only logical conclusion. But, they

absolutely cannot face the fact that there are negative aspects of

themselves so they deny and deny and deny.

Glad you got your things back. We got a lock on our door...and used

it!

> >

> > Hi ,

> >

> > Your daughter sounds like my BP daughter when it comes

> to 'borrowing'

> > things.

> > It's like it's okay for her to come into my room (whether i'm

here

> or

> > not) but if I go into HER room.......... there's hell to pay.

With

> > the orders of how i have to knock, i'm not to go into her room

when

> > she's not home blah blah blah.

> > She's not saying don't come into my room when i'm not home thing

so

> > much. I think she got sick of me dumping any clean laundry on

the

> > floor outside her door. It seemed such a childish thing to do,

but

> it

> > was a small victory.

> > She'll come into my room, spray my perfume, use moisturiser etc

> etc.

> > rarely asking first.

> > ARghh BP kids!

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Guest guest

Your reply reminds me to protect and be sensitive to the non bp

younger sister. She has also had this problem. Sometimes I had to

step in. They have such different styles now that I don't think

they would wear the same things much. YOu know, I wonder if this

has anything to do with the younger, non's current chosen clothing

style - kind of a grunge punk. I wonder if part of the reason is

that there is no chance her sister will take her clothes?

For a long time I focused so much of my attention on the bp

daughter that I think the other two may have felt short changed.

I did get a lock for my door. two, actually. She broke the first

by picking it one too many times. When I replaced it, she broke the

door, so that I no longer even have a doorknob. (She " stumbled and

fell coming out of the bathroom, and fell against my door and it

broke. " And how to explain the screwdriver on the floor? I forget

what she said she was getting ready to fix but she had a story for

that too.)

The first time I ever locked my bedroom door, with me inside (I

wanted one half hour peace and quiet without interruption, I had

worked third shift and I needed a nap) she first pounded on it for

fifteen minutes, then tried to climb in the window, which is 12 feet

off the ground! The heat pump is underneath, and she stacked chairs

and stuff on it. This was when she was around 13 or 14. She just

could not stand that I had a physical boundary that she could not

cross.

When I was a teenager, I thought if my parents couldn't present me

with absolute proof I was lying, they had to believe me. Or at

least couldn't punish me for what I did if they couldn't prove I did

it. I think I watched too much Mason. (There, I'm giving

away my age.) Having played that game, I don't fall for it much. I

don't care if you admit it, I know you did it and you know you did

it.

Once when I was pretty broke, I accidentally left my last $5 on the

bathroom counter. I took a shower and had taken the bill out of my

jeans. After dtr used the bathroom the money was gone. I told her

it was my last $5 and needed it to buy food, and asked her to help

me look for it - didn't accuse her. Then made sure I looked in a

different room. In a few minutes she " found " the money in the

living room. There was no one else home at the time. I think she

knew I knew, but needed a way to give the money back without

admitting guilt. The same sort of thing has happened with other

items she takes - she hasn't seen them when I ask, but then they

turn up somewhere where I would have seen them if they had been

there.

Sometimes she will admit to things she did years ago. But not at

the time. Sometimes she has admitted to things I didn't even

suspect. Another one of her lines, when she gets caught at

something, is " The ONE time I ___, I get caught! " ) Fill in sneak

out, drink underage, skip class, take the car without permission,

etc. SUUURE that was the only time!

You know, she will borrow clothes (with or without permission) and

then alter them! She hates shoulder pads, for instance, and will

cut them out without asking. She once slit the seams of her

sister's pants so they would fit over boots. Fortunately they

turned out to be an old pair the sister no longer wore, because I

was getting ready to jump in like a mother hen, and I am afraid we

would have gotten into a screaming fight. The damage was already

done, and she didn't have any money that I could make her replace

them with. I felt totally helpless, and I tend to lose it when I

feel helpless. When I confront on this stuff, it's like she cannot

see the wrongness in taking what she wants or altering it - she

seems so honestly bewildered - " But they wouldn't fit over my

boots! " " But shoulder pads are so uncomfortable! " She even leaves

the top off of my nail polish on purpose because she prefers it

thicker. NO acknowledgement at all that the item was not hers, or

that there is any difference between what is hers and what is mine

or her sister's. And sometimes I lose my temper at that point,

because when I was a kid with a BP mother, nothing was ever mine

either, and I was forbidden to shut or lock my door (which is what

my daughter has done to me in effect unless I want to spring for a

new door, which she would probably also break). Not to mention her

BP father who would actually give away my stuff. I wonder if some

of her lack of respect for other people's boundaries is learned from

him, or at least reinforced by him.

> > >

> > > Hi ,

> > >

> > > Your daughter sounds like my BP daughter when it comes

> > to 'borrowing'

> > > things.

> > > It's like it's okay for her to come into my room (whether i'm

> here

> > or

> > > not) but if I go into HER room.......... there's hell to pay.

> With

> > > the orders of how i have to knock, i'm not to go into her room

> when

> > > she's not home blah blah blah.

> > > She's not saying don't come into my room when i'm not home

thing

> so

> > > much. I think she got sick of me dumping any clean laundry on

> the

> > > floor outside her door. It seemed such a childish thing to do,

> but

> > it

> > > was a small victory.

> > > She'll come into my room, spray my perfume, use moisturiser

etc

> > etc.

> > > rarely asking first.

> > > ARghh BP kids!

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Guest guest

What you are describing is what I see in my bp dtr on a regular

basis -- the boundary issue is not in place. No matter what I do,

she oversteps the line, like it is nonexistent. Sometimes that's

what drives me the craziest. I don't even have a bedroom at our

house, because I can only afford a 2 bedroom -- so I give each of

the kids their own bedroom. So I have tried to explain to the kids

when we are all at calm mode, that if I ask them to go to their

rooms for a while, it's because I just need a few moments to

myself. If I do that at all, then my bp dtr wants to sleep in the

living room with me. It drives me nuts!!!

> > > >

> > > > Hi ,

> > > >

> > > > Your daughter sounds like my BP daughter when it comes

> > > to 'borrowing'

> > > > things.

> > > > It's like it's okay for her to come into my room (whether

i'm

> > here

> > > or

> > > > not) but if I go into HER room.......... there's hell to

pay.

> > With

> > > > the orders of how i have to knock, i'm not to go into her

room

> > when

> > > > she's not home blah blah blah.

> > > > She's not saying don't come into my room when i'm not home

> thing

> > so

> > > > much. I think she got sick of me dumping any clean laundry

on

> > the

> > > > floor outside her door. It seemed such a childish thing to

do,

> > but

> > > it

> > > > was a small victory.

> > > > She'll come into my room, spray my perfume, use moisturiser

> etc

> > > etc.

> > > > rarely asking first.

> > > > ARghh BP kids!

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