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Not a Happy Camper

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Hi everyone, I'm here because I had mammogram and sonogram done three

days ago of an area that Moffitt Cancer Center has been following for

two years. The area that they have been watching has grown from 5mm

to 9.7mm over the past six months. The core biopsy done from this site

showed papilloma with florid hyperplasia two years ago. I think there

were atypical cells.

As a result of the results from three days ago, an MRI and excision

have been recommended. I have to wait until March 3to have the MRI

done because my health insurance is not active until March 1.

I had breast cancer in 1990 intraductal carcinoma in situ with one

area of possible invasion. I had a mastectomy at that time of my

right breast with simultaneous reconstruction.

So, I have been cancer free for 14 years and now this situation

presents itself and I'm terrified. I know being terrified doesn't

help anything, but I still am. I think I am reliving the 1990 event.

I was spared then by God I feel and the prayers and love and skill of

others.I wonder if I will be graced this time. I don't know how to

calm myself except to talk and express how scared I feel. Also, I'm

trying to get more information but basically I feel very helpless

right now. I am fifty three and single. I do have supportive family

members. I hate that I am the source of worry for them with yet a new

personal concern now, too. The last few years of my life have been

pretty rough across the board.I have just started to rebuild from out

of " ashes " . I lost everything pretty much . I am now at a new job in

my sixth week and it just feels like oh, no! Not another

form of stress right now! Anyway, I know that I am only one of many

who are facing the unknown right now. I appreciate whoever may be

reading this and any responses from you. I am also seeking a

spiritual path or connection with God quite fervently now. I know

there is something more than us, larger,a higher power. I feel so

small and helpless very much the way I felt back in 1990. I guess I

will stop here. Thank you for reading this. Beverly nickname Eve

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