what do you tell and how much?

[Guest guest]

I've realized recently that I hold back in telling people about growing up in a

family full of mental illness--people who really should know and want to know

more about me. I'm not worried about their reactions--I'm thinking here of

supportive people like, say, my therapist and my best friend.

It's that, in truth, I myself don't want to know what happened to me. I don't

want to know that people like my parents exist in the world and I don't want to

know what cruelty is done by some human beings to others. I don't want to know

that God allows it. It is simply too terrible, too horrifying, and it feels

like a tremendous burden to me to know even to the extent of the horrifying

things that were done to me. I don't want really anyone else to have to share

in that burden.

Can anyone else relate to this? And what do you do about it? I feel that what

I experienced when I was small has shaped nearly everything about me. If I want

to be close to people, I think they need to know something about where I came

from. I have to tell them things beyond just generalities. But I can't do that

if I feel like what I have to say might be harming someone.

Thanks,

Ashana

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[Guest guest]

I'm an open book when I feel comfortable with someone so it's not an issue for

me. Most of my close friends would tell you I wear my heart on my sleeve.

I can understand where you're coming from and I really don't blame you at all.

I am often ashamed of nada's mental health condition. If I do tell someone, I

hurriedly say 'it is not hereditary or genetic'. I don't believe it is and my

friend who is a mental health therapist and diagnosed my nada for me

after meeting her without my nada knowing it told me I do not have it.

I would only tell those I felt really comfortable with the truth about your

nada. If they're good, compassionate, sensitive, loving souls they won't judge

you because your nada is a fruitcake like mine that's half baked.

I hope this helps.