HUMOR

[Guest guest]

"Practice Earthquake Safety"Earthquakes can strike without warning, andbeing prepared for such a disaster can meanthe difference between life and death. Hereare some tips to help you and your loved onesmake it through a quake:~ Those living in areas not prone to earthquakescan respond quickly to the plight of disastervictims in quake zones by complacentlysmirking and saying, "I told you so."~ To minimize loss and damage in a quake,try not to own things.~ Practice your burrowing-out-from-under-40-tons-of-rubble skills ahead of time.~ Look out your window often. If you see a large,zig-zag-shaped crevasse moving rapidly fromthe horizon toward your home, step either tothe right or the left.~ For those who fear earthquakes, it maycomfort you to know that a majority of thedamage during the 1906 San Franciscoearthquake did not come from the tremorsthemselves. Instead, it was from the raging, out-of-control fires that consumed most of the city.~ A doorway is the safest place to be duringa quake. Eat, sleep, and work in doorways.~ Be sure to mail your house-insurancepayments a full five business days beforea major earthquake strikes.~ In the event of a quake, get under somethingheavy, such as a desk, a table, or your boss.~ If you are caught in a major earthquake inSouthern California and are part of theentertainment industry, take a moment or twoto reflect on how grossly you've wasted your life.