Rheumatic Fever

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Peggy:I had Rheumatic Fever too. So did Donna. Right Donna? I wonder who else did. We have wondered if RF is what triggered MS in us. Sharon This email is a natural hand made product. The slight variations in spelling and grammar enhance its individual character and beauty and in no way are to be considered flaws or defects. Re: Peggy - Needles & Auto-Ject & I'm So Sorry

Donna,

No need to apologize, I know that everyone has fears, I seem to have

alot of them. I KNOW that I HAVE to do this. I fear that I am still

in denial a bit over this whole thing. Even after a year, almost.

When I was young, in 2nd grade when I had rheumatic fever I spent

most of the school year in the hospital. My teacher came a few times

a week to tutor me. It was agonizing being so young and alone at

night and alot during the day and away from my sisters mostly. You

would have thought that I would have gotten used to needles. I had

blood taken every day while I was there. I got to the point where I

didn't even need to have the rubber thing on my arm. I just used to

make a fist and hold the upper part of my arm with my other hand. How

sad is that?

I remember coming home for Thanksgiving and not being able to go to

my Gramma's with the rest of my sisters and having to eat at home

while I laid on the couch and ate off a tv tray in the living room. I

ended up going back to the hospital that night. At that time I didn't

even weigh 50 lbs. I think maybe there was something other than

rheumatic fever going on at the time, but what did I know. I was on

penicillin for 8 years!!! Yeah, don't ask me!!! By the end of 3rd

grade I finally weighed in at 53 lbs. to the satisfaction of my dr.

who had threatened me with more hospitalization if I didn't get over

50 lbs by then.

So when it comes to needles, you'd think I'd be a pro. I don't mind

having blood taken, I can just turn my head. The thought of having to

have a shot every day for the rest of my life, I just can't get past

it. On top of that, my Dad is diabetic as well and I had gestational

diabetes when I was pregnant with both kids so it's probably just a

matter of time for me with that. Geez, am I a downer or what? LOL!!!

Well, I am on my way out to shop for end of the year gifts for 6

preschool teachers and aides and a busdriver and bus aide and a

nurse!!! Wish me luck, hoping to get off cheaply!!! Yeah, right,

LOL!!!

Hugs,

Peggy

>

> Peggy,

>

> I have to apologize to you, I really do.. You know the word

association game that people play? Well that seems to be the game my

brain is playing with itself at 6 a.m. this morning. After Zucco

woofed in my face, and I'm crossing my fingers on this one; I think

he's finally learned to woofe in my face BEFORE he poops on the

living room floor! and both puppies were out, did their business and

while I THOUGHT I was going to get to go back to bed for another 10

to 15 minutes, until Zucco wanted up in the bed and Buster became a

little snot and moved his butt from the perfectly fine position he

was in, to spread out all over the bed so Zucco would have a hard

time finding a spot to lay down..and of course I HAD to get up

because there was NO room for me..

>

> Well, I'm sitting here reading through the last couple of e-mails

that came in this morning. I remembered through bleery eyes, how I

came to learn how to do subcutaneous injections, and the fact that

I've always been curious about things like that. I was even looking

forward to watching them do the bone graft on my ankle when I found

out I was having a spinal for that surgery... THEN I found out they'd

be giving me enough Versed that I wouldn't be awake at all, except

for certain short periods of time. I know I woke up just about long

enough to ask the doc if he was starting to work on my hip (that's

where they took the bone from), and he asked me if I could feel it,

and I said.. nope.. just a pressure, like he was pushing on it or

something.. I saw him look at the anesthetist and the boom-boom out

went the lights again.. so I didn't get to watch the bone graft..

>

> But I've always been curious to watch and learn stuff like that.. I

thought and still think it's kewl.. Well I learned subcute injections

when I came downstairs one more to find her struggling with her arm

up against a wall, trying to inject her insulin in an arm...I was

leary at first when she told me it was easy to do, and I HAD to at

least talk to the doctor before I'd inject for her but before long, I

was helping her with her hard to reach places for injection.. And

the word association thing in my brain kept rolling...

>

> Then I was thinking about how many children with Juvenile Onset

Diabetes were giving themself injections.. . and then POW it hit me

like a Mack Truck hauling a load of concrete blocks!..

>

> I forget that because I'm curious about something, or I know how to

do something, or because I'm interested in something.. that not

everybody else IS as I am.. and I remembered my little brother (who's

not so little anymore).. and just how phobic he was concerning

needles... I watched him nearly destroy a doctor's exam room when he

had to have some injection or another.. and he was very little.. and

little kids CAN climb all over a room like monkeys when they think

they have to (sometimes when they don't think they have to but just

want to as well)...

>

> But that picture came back as clear as a bell this morning.. Then

the memory of the dentist cussing my parents out and my brother AND

telling them to NEVER EVER bring him back to his office again... I

don't remember HOW that tooth that needed pulled eventually got

pulled... And then again.. when he was in his early teens maybe.. I

know he was tall enough to fill up the length of a gurney in the

E.R... and he'd been exposed to Mono.. and then was running a fever

and I think his throat was swelled up as well.. Mom and dad were

busy, or maybe on vacation... so I HAD to take him to the E.R... and

there were FIVE nurses and myself laying across him on that gurney

until they drew blood.. He was a little more still that time than I

really expected.. then later I learned why... yeah.. he was in his

very early teens or had just entered puberty.. and the reason he laid

more still than expected... A fairly well endowed nurse was the one

at his head region.. and yeah.. her ta-ta's were in his face!!!

LOL...

>

> But now realizing that I've been trivializing what to you is such a

major major problem.. I do have to apologize to you profusely this

morning.. I must appear totally heartless.. I am really sorry....

Your fear of needles and self-injecting is every bit as real as

Trista's contaminated floors are to her, and my need for music and

other things to be in a certain order, or Val having to wash her

hands and all the other things that we have been joking about

recently.. To the person it affects, it's extremely important..

though some of us (smacking myself on the head) just don't think

about how REAL the situation is to someone else.. I once again

apologize for my rude and crude thoughtlessness. . I am sincerely

sorry.

>

> |}onna

>

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