Leaving my mother

[Guest guest]

Hello Everyone,

I have decided to leave my mother's house, I am 24 and after graduating college

I figured

it would be a good idea to live with her to save some money and help her out.

She

struggles with what after some research I think is bpd. I love her very much,

but she has

made me living with her almost impossible. There is a history of abuse between

her and I.

It all started after her divorce to my father, I sort of became the punching

bag.

She has ups and downs all the time, I am always walking on egg shells around

her. If I say

something that could have a double meaning she always takes the negative one and

runs

with it. She goes through periods where she is the best mother in the world,

and we get

along great, but then all of the sudden things change and she becomes verbally

abusive

towards me. The physical abuse ended as I left for college.

Last monday when I told her that I was moving out, as I am 24 and have a good

job, she

told me that if I moved I would be putting her on the streets, and that I was a

horrible

person, who needed mental help, that it was my duty to make her happy, that I

should

make my life about making her happy, since she had done soo much for me. She has

never

had health insurance for me, I paid my way through college, and the house she

lives in is

paid for by my father's child support, because she does not work. I have offered

to help

her out financially until the end of the year, but after that I told her she

would be on her

own.

My mother is not an elderly person she is not even 50, she is healthy and

incredibly smart,

but there is something that is keeping her from standing up and taking charge of

her life.

She blames my father whom she divorced almost 12 years ago for everything that

has

gone wrong in her life, she constantly tells me that he is a bad heartless

person and that I

am just like him.

I have struggled with depression for a while now due to the incredible amounts

of abuse

that I have endured. I am trying to make a life altering decision for the best.

Yet I feel like

I am doing something wrong, and I do not know why? Any advise is greatly

appreciated.