(w/response)

[Guest guest]

" bbrodley " wrote:

<<, you sound really angry and discouraged. I am sorry you're time is

so limited. I'm sure everyone on the list is concerned for you.

I, for one, do not know about a post on DSM5 because until recently, I did not

read the digests every time I got one. I don't know about other people but it

took me YEARS to get up the nerve to start tapering, because of my life with a

special needs child being so demanding. So, during those years I was one of

your members, but not actively tapering. I would read your group from time to

time and it gave me inspiration. This year, I finally got up the nerve, after

years of sporadically reading other people's posts (and yours). Then when I did

start to taper, your website had been stripped of most of the information.

I re-read your introduction to your group and it does not say the members must

answer periodic questions from the moderator. If you did state that as a

requirement, I'm sure members would do it! >>

** I don't think something like this needs to be a requirement just as I

think it shouldn't take a requirement for more than 4 people from a group of

over 1200 to respond to something that has had such a negative impact on their

lives and the lives of others. It shouldn't have to be a requirement in order

for people to take action.

You said:

<<You are angry but no one wanted to abandon you. Now you've abandoned the

group members by taking down all your files -- it is a confusing message. In

fact, it simply looks like your site is malfunctioning. Now that I know you are

being spiteful, it's really disappointing and I feel you are misunderstanding

your members.>>

** First, I am not being spiteful. You're right, I AM angry but even more

so, I'm disappointed.

I have not " abandoned " anyone. I get to close gown the froup I created if I

choose to do so. There were no promises. There are no guarantees of unlimited

perpetual access to my intellectual property.

You said:

<<, with all due respect, I think you may need a co-moderator to help.

>>

** At this point, this is moot. Back some time ago, it was explored but

finding someone with the necessary background willing to donate what amounts to

more than a full time job to the group when up and running, is not possible.

You said:

<<I think you may need to rewrite your requirements for membership.>>

** If you believe this, this is a fine example of why I've chosen to close

down the group.

You said:

<<I think you may need to resend questions when you don't get enough

information.>>

** I have no idea what you're talking about here. But I do think your

response is quite arrogant considering that, by your own admission, you only

recently began reading the info here to any great degree. Because of this, you

have no idea how much time and energy I've given this group in the past 6 years.

While not everyone would think to consider this, I would expect that those with

no real knowledge of my contributions her refrain from commenting.

You said:

<< Everyone appreciates you but your anger is just coming out of left field.

There are ways you can get what you want without acting irrationally. I hope

this is helpful.>>

** Very helpful. It helps to reinforce my decision. Again, had you been

reading more, you would know that my " anger " is not " coming out of left field " .

This issue was the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back. I waited quite

a while before acting on this. I have a rule of thumb that serves me well. If

something keeps nagging at me despite my attempts to put it behind me, this

means I need to look at how I want to address it. In this particular situation,

I knew what I wanted to do but held back, hoping my feelings would change with

time. They didn't. So I acted. This is a healthy thing for me to be doing and

I feel better since doing it. This, for me, is confirmation that I've done the

right thing.

Of those who have been here for a while, of those who were here and have

moved on, some know the blood, sweat, and tears I gave this group for years.

Virtually only one or two know how ill I was three-quarters of this time. I

chose to keep this private.

I'll be damned if I can't get people to take some action on a very important

issue when I've asked for so little in return. The idea of having to 'legislate'

it if I truly want a response is truly distasteful to me. If that is what is

needed to get people to act, I've failed horribly here.

The bottom line -- I have no guilt whatsoever when it comes to this group.

I've decided to move on. I am under no obligation to leave behind my

intellectual work. There is a valid concern that if these archives are left,

people will misinterpret and misuse and ultimately blame me for their failure

(withdrawal and recovery done the best it can be, is highly individualized.

Without recommendations tailored to a person's needs/system, I cannot ensure

results). I need to guard against this.

What I find really discouraging is that the only response here on the list so

far other than Tonya is from someone with whom I've never even worked. There

are so many people here with whom I thought a relationship had been developed.

So far, they're silent.

Since it looks like the group is malfunctioning I will post on the front page

that the group is closed and how to contact me.

--