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If you thought that they were unaware of the destructive affect they have by

their behavior, this should dispell all doubts. They probably knew what was in

those letters and didn't have the courage to open them. Take it for what it is

worth and live your life as you see fit.

Be Strong

It has been awhile

So it has been awhile since I have posted anything. Just to refresh

your memory the last time I posted was when I sent not only my Mom but

her 3 sisters (the enablers) each a letter by UPS. It pretty much

summed up the whole I am the black sheep and I am through living my

life like this. I ended it by saying that my mother needed help not to

be babied. I sent the letters almost 3 weeks ago. I just received a

phone call from UPS saying that my mother and my aunt (who lives with

her) sent the letters back saying that they did not live at that

address (which they do). Part of me wants to call and ask what they are

so afraid of? A letter? I am so furios.. Why though? I knew that they

would do something underhanded and seedy. But I am PISSED!!

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I don't blame you for being pissed. This is a game and you have been

given a very undesirable role. There is nothing authentic about it,

it's disgusting, and eff them, to be blunt. Eventually they will

probably turn on each other with you out of the picture. Then when

they eventually do you can pull the 'not at this address b.s.'. I am

so sorry, I know it hurts to be ganged up on and defamed, I've been

through it. It's so funny to being around my family and being made the

bad guy and then being around when they get mad at each other and talk

about each other behind the other's back. There are no firm

allegiances, everyone is just insincere as can be. It's always 'lets

make someone a black sheep' and direct our bile at them. But they

really don't like each other either that much, though. These ladies

sound like a bunch of idiots; now you know, at least, what they are

capable of. Hugs.

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You've done all you can do -- to keep getting angry at them shows a

hope that maybe they'll want to listen to your side and be fair.

And we all know that most of the time, BPDs don't play fair.

It's time to let them go -- you tried and they rebuffed your attempt

to be heard.

Sorry that happened -- it does hurt. Taking care of you involves

moving ahead anyway, despite what they do.

>

> So it has been awhile since I have posted anything. Just to

refresh

> your memory the last time I posted was when I sent not only my Mom

but

> her 3 sisters (the enablers) each a letter by UPS. It pretty much

> summed up the whole I am the black sheep and I am through living

my

> life like this. I ended it by saying that my mother needed help

not to

> be babied. I sent the letters almost 3 weeks ago. I just received

a

> phone call from UPS saying that my mother and my aunt (who lives

with

> her) sent the letters back saying that they did not live at that

> address (which they do). Part of me wants to call and ask what

they are

> so afraid of? A letter? I am so furios. Why though? I knew that

they

> would do something underhanded and seedy. But I am PISSED!!

>

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To read your letter is to acknowledge there is a problem.

Though, even if they had read it, they'd still deny they've done

anything.

That's the thing about being labeled the bad seed of the family.

No one will even ackowledge the problem is real...they'll turn it back

on you as being " crazy " or " deranged " or something. Why? Because, they

like the status quo. You are there serving as target practice.

Trust me. Sometimes, it is just easier to... what is it they say " let

go and let God " handle them.

>

> So it has been awhile since I have posted anything. Just to refresh

> your memory the last time I posted was when I sent not only my Mom

but

> her 3 sisters (the enablers) each a letter by UPS. It pretty much

> summed up the whole I am the black sheep and I am through living my

> life like this. I ended it by saying that my mother needed help not

to

> be babied. I sent the letters almost 3 weeks ago. I just received a

> phone call from UPS saying that my mother and my aunt (who lives with

> her) sent the letters back saying that they did not live at that

> address (which they do). Part of me wants to call and ask what they

are

> so afraid of? A letter? I am so furios. Why though? I knew that they

> would do something underhanded and seedy. But I am PISSED!!

>

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h.mize--when I read your post, I chuckled a little. I know, it's

easier when it's not your family--I'd be pissed too, but just

picturing the old crones involving UPS in their cover-up and denying

that they live where they live in order to deny getting your letter so

that they can ultimately deny their mistreatment of you . . .well,

it's a good one.

It's interesting that you have to ask yourself why you're pissed. If

a " normal " person who was not raised in a BPD family had this kind of

thing happen, they'd probably blow a fuse. I think being pissed is an

" appropriate response " as my first therapist used to tell me. By the

way, recently, I was relating a typical nada meltdown to my new

therapist. I wasn't angry, because I'd become accustomed to it, but

he reminded me, paused the conversation and just said--literally,

" that really sucks. " And it's a good reminder. Because the fact that

we can anticipate the madness and can come to expect it doesn't make

it any more acceptable.

You might never get them to face what you wrote in your letter or even

discuss it with you, much less apologize or change their ways. You

know that, right? It's good that you wrote the letter, it means you're

sticking up for yourself and asserting yourself and who knows where

that will lead?

Maybe you just need a nice long break from all of them. If it were

me, I'd refuse contact with them until they admitted receiving the

letter at least. But then, I relish any break from my FOO.

Trish

>

> So it has been awhile since I have posted anything. Just to refresh

> your memory the last time I posted was when I sent not only my Mom but

> her 3 sisters (the enablers) each a letter by UPS. It pretty much

> summed up the whole I am the black sheep and I am through living my

> life like this. I ended it by saying that my mother needed help not to

> be babied. I sent the letters almost 3 weeks ago. I just received a

> phone call from UPS saying that my mother and my aunt (who lives with

> her) sent the letters back saying that they did not live at that

> address (which they do). Part of me wants to call and ask what they are

> so afraid of? A letter? I am so furios. Why though? I knew that they

> would do something underhanded and seedy. But I am PISSED!!

>

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