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Breakdown

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I'm having a real tough time of it today.  I had a very intense conversation

with a friend last night over a few drinks (yeah yeah alkeehal is the devil). 

She was abused too and had a tough time of it.  She's my age and it still

affects her.  Of course to myself I say " well, she was abused ever so much more

than me " because there were physical signs.  Abuse is abuse right? So why do I

underplay my abuse?

I've forgotten to take my meds for the past week or so.  I had a complete

breakdown last night. I popped my pill this afternoon but of course it'll take a

few days to kick back in.  Why do I do this?  If B weren't here I'd be so

completely lost right now. 

A day later and I'm still horribly depressed over my breakdown last night. I'm

embarrassed and ashamed.  I should be able to handle this.  I don't know why I

can't.

Amy

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