Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

[Guest guest]

We have one other beautician in this group, she can tell you about getting the use of your arm for that. You have every right to be angry. But save that energy for fighting that damn dragon. Fight with all you have in you. Chemo isnt so bad, they give you anti nausea med to take after each treatment, also they give you some before your IV. It really helps. You may or may not be aboe to continue working through chemo, my Dr didnt want me to work as I worked in retail and he didnt want me around some many people because of the germs. colds cough etc, your immune system is comprimised. Your Dr will be able to tell you more.

Hugs

Jeana

[Guest guest]

We have one other beautician in this group, she can tell you about getting the use of your arm for that. You have every right to be angry. But save that energy for fighting that damn dragon. Fight with all you have in you. Chemo isnt so bad, they give you anti nausea med to take after each treatment, also they give you some before your IV. It really helps. You may or may not be aboe to continue working through chemo, my Dr didnt want me to work as I worked in retail and he didnt want me around some many people because of the germs. colds cough etc, your immune system is comprimised. Your Dr will be able to tell you more.

Hugs

Jeana

[Guest guest]

Hi Judy,

I am glad your husband is being supportive. My husband wrote a letter after my surgery and it is on the site listed below. Its down towards the middle to bottom of the site its called The Woman You Love.

I didn't get sick from my chemo. I worked Mon. was home Tues. the day I got chemo. Stayed home Wed. only because I was able to. Worked Thurs. Fri. Home Sat. Sun. and then did the same the following week. The third week I took pills and worked all week and the same the fourth week. This went on for 6 mo.

I will keep you in my prayers.

Hugs

nne

Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html

Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com

Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

[Guest guest]

Oh that gives me some hope......TY..it will ruin us if I can't work....that

guilt, I don't need right now.....I will read it ...on my way .........I was there last night, but had taken a sleeping pill and was falling asleep..

Hugs Judy

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

Hi Judy,

I am glad your husband is being supportive. My husband wrote a letter after my surgery and it is on the site listed below. Its down towards the middle to bottom of the site its called The Woman You Love.

I didn't get sick from my chemo. I worked Mon. was home Tues. the day I got chemo. Stayed home Wed. only because I was able to. Worked Thurs. Fri. Home Sat. Sun. and then did the same the following week. The third week I took pills and worked all week and the same the fourth week. This went on for 6 mo.

I will keep you in my prayers.

Hugs

nne

Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html

Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com

Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

[Guest guest]

The Women You Love

Oh my............how beautiful and such a loving man.....the letter is just what my hubby needs to read.......he, by nature, is one that doesn't say much....

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

Hi Judy,

I am glad your husband is being supportive. My husband wrote a letter after my surgery and it is on the site listed below. Its down towards the middle to bottom of the site its called The Woman You Love.

I didn't get sick from my chemo. I worked Mon. was home Tues. the day I got chemo. Stayed home Wed. only because I was able to. Worked Thurs. Fri. Home Sat. Sun. and then did the same the following week. The third week I took pills and worked all week and the same the fourth week. This went on for 6 mo.

I will keep you in my prayers.

Hugs

nne

Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html

Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com

Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

[Guest guest]

The Women You Love

Oh my............how beautiful and such a loving man.....the letter is just what my hubby needs to read.......he, by nature, is one that doesn't say much....

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

Hi Judy,

I am glad your husband is being supportive. My husband wrote a letter after my surgery and it is on the site listed below. Its down towards the middle to bottom of the site its called The Woman You Love.

I didn't get sick from my chemo. I worked Mon. was home Tues. the day I got chemo. Stayed home Wed. only because I was able to. Worked Thurs. Fri. Home Sat. Sun. and then did the same the following week. The third week I took pills and worked all week and the same the fourth week. This went on for 6 mo.

I will keep you in my prayers.

Hugs

nne

Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html

Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com

Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

[Guest guest]

The Women You Love

Oh my............how beautiful and such a loving man.....the letter is just what my hubby needs to read.......he, by nature, is one that doesn't say much....

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

Hi Judy,

I am glad your husband is being supportive. My husband wrote a letter after my surgery and it is on the site listed below. Its down towards the middle to bottom of the site its called The Woman You Love.

I didn't get sick from my chemo. I worked Mon. was home Tues. the day I got chemo. Stayed home Wed. only because I was able to. Worked Thurs. Fri. Home Sat. Sun. and then did the same the following week. The third week I took pills and worked all week and the same the fourth week. This went on for 6 mo.

I will keep you in my prayers.

Hugs

nne

Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html

Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com

Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

[Guest guest]

Glad you liked it. Chuck is definitely a keeper. We will be married 41 yrs in Oct.

Hugs

nne

Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Lifehttp://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html

Check out my breast cancer ornaments at:http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.htmlalso check out my other ornaments and lots of nice gifts at:http://www.cancerclub.com

Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

[Guest guest]

OF COURSE YOU CAN BEAT THIS THINGS!!

I understand you are a very active person. I wonder (but not willing to know because is your business) if you are a believer. When I was diagnosed with bc I wasn't. I was always on the run, 1000 things that needed to be done "yesterday". I was taking responsability for everyone, doing everybody else job at home, running errands for everybody. And then, I had to slow down because of the cancer. Chemo, radiations, lots of time with myself. And I found Jesus. Now I believe that my cancer has been a way for Jesus to show His glory and grace, because I may die tomorrow.......I am happy with myself. And I have Him. It's about Him, it is not about me. I was born catholic, and raised catholic, and I left the church when I was a teenager. I guess the Lord wanted me home, in a way or another. I don't question anymore. After the bc diagnosis, please believe me, my life changed in better from where I was before. I was buried alive, walking in the dark. Now I have Jesus. I am a new

born, I was told. Yeah.

Anyway.

I have a story. It's about autism (my younger son is autistic). It says : "Lets' say you are planning a beautiful trip to Italy---you go to school, you learn same Italian, you pack cloths for Italian weather, you are dreaming about Italian food and italian museums, squares,old churches and country view. You are in the airplane, thinking that you are so close to get there, your "dream vacation". And then, the airplane land and you are in.......Holland. What can you do? kill yourself, or try to enjoy the new vacation in this completely unknow place for you?"---Holland, in the story, is autism, and the trip in the airplane is the pregnancy. I may say that could be the same for cancer. It's a de-tour in your life, and you do will be back on the old road, but...you do will be better. a new person. You'll know how to stop and smell the roses, you'll know that a smile worth more than a diamond ring, and a hug is priceless. You'll see. You will be back on your old road,

willing to share and support whoever else will be at the beginning of this journey. And if you have not Him, ...I pray you will find Him, and the peace that came in believing..

Hey, thank you....I am ok, my husband is a lost cause. I am sorry for him, and pray for his soul a lot. I gave him to the Lord, waiting for a miracle.

love you.....

LucillaJudy G wrote:

TY Lucilla,

I am so sorry for the way your husband handled it..I can't even imagine how it made you feel.

....I'm not so much afraid of dying..and I know this may sound weird.....maybe my way of dealing with it...but I am so mad for it intruding in my life.....my work. How dare it do this.....Christmas is coming.Thanksgiving.....I need to fix the dinner...buy for Christmas...I could just cry......I've done nothing else........but cry.I'm about dry.

I'm always on the move......I had two jobs....I have just quit the one to look for something different...I was working with mentally and physically disabled women...But I had one that bit me once a week.....No.not for meanness......because she got jealous when I paid attention to one of the other ladies or they with me......LOL I love her.......but I just had to make the decision....me or her..LOL

On the weekends.I do demos in the stores here....Ive done this for about 6 years now......I was a hairdresser........got tired of standing for 12 or 14 hours..I had just made up my mind to buy some new supplies and go back into doing nails..and making my jewelry. I also write poetry and short stories..... Oh boy, do I have a couple of poems in me right now..But I'm not sure how to word it without all of the cussing.....

Ty so much for putting me a bit more at ease.......you have NO idea how much better I am starting to feel...I feel like I can beat this thing.....and it not beat me.......

Hugs Lucilla

Judy

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

Dear Judy,

that women die for breast cancer is becaming a myth, just know that. It's a hard fight, and YES, it is possible to lose it, but very rare. There is lot of support out there, and you have no idea of how many women with bc. Still alive, still around, with their hair back, as well as the good living.

I had the surgery for the lympho under my arm, and it happened 1 year and 1/2 ago. So far so good. Once in a while my arm hurts, expecially when I carry the grocery, but I am ok.

Chemo is a sh**. I did chemo on Friday, so I could have the week end to try to be back on my feet. Around the following Tuesday I felt less nauseated, and able to "live". I had four round of chemo, one every 3 weeks. I lost all my hair after the second chemo, but instead of crying I made a joke of that, and I bought myself funny hats. I was wearing (I still do) a pink ribbon all the time, so it happened more than one time that someone in the stores or at church came to me and said "I've been there, be strong you can do it". Actually, to lose the hair is a big deal, but there is nothing you can do about it, so let's trush depression and try to use the thing as a "oh.....no bad hair day for a while", hope it make sense. You do chemo for your own good, to gain chances of no recurrances in the future.

Actually radiation was "horrible" because it made me sooooooooo sleepy!

BUT everything is gone, water under the bridge, and praise the Lord I'm still around so far trying to cheer who is at the beginning of the journey.

You have a good husband, you said. Good for you. Take advantage of that for support. My husband was so piss about the cancer.......he blamed it on me. When I had the lumpectomy, still groggy for the sedation, I had to drive home by myself.

First chemo...oh, that was something. I was crying, of course, really scared. My husband came to the doctor with me.....with his portable computer. While I was crying, he ignored me. The oncologist was so mad that escorted him at the door with a "I believe you can go outside with your business, your wife needs same love now".

Oh well.....

Baby, keep going. It is a hard journey, but you are not alone, and you can do it, as the women in this group. This group is really like family to me.

Besides......hodwy gals, I miss ya all!! lots of love,

LucillaJudy G wrote:

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

Do you Yahoo!?Yahoo! Mail - You care about security. So do we.

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

OF COURSE YOU CAN BEAT THIS THINGS!!

I understand you are a very active person. I wonder (but not willing to know because is your business) if you are a believer. When I was diagnosed with bc I wasn't. I was always on the run, 1000 things that needed to be done "yesterday". I was taking responsability for everyone, doing everybody else job at home, running errands for everybody. And then, I had to slow down because of the cancer. Chemo, radiations, lots of time with myself. And I found Jesus. Now I believe that my cancer has been a way for Jesus to show His glory and grace, because I may die tomorrow.......I am happy with myself. And I have Him. It's about Him, it is not about me. I was born catholic, and raised catholic, and I left the church when I was a teenager. I guess the Lord wanted me home, in a way or another. I don't question anymore. After the bc diagnosis, please believe me, my life changed in better from where I was before. I was buried alive, walking in the dark. Now I have Jesus. I am a new

born, I was told. Yeah.

Anyway.

I have a story. It's about autism (my younger son is autistic). It says : "Lets' say you are planning a beautiful trip to Italy---you go to school, you learn same Italian, you pack cloths for Italian weather, you are dreaming about Italian food and italian museums, squares,old churches and country view. You are in the airplane, thinking that you are so close to get there, your "dream vacation". And then, the airplane land and you are in.......Holland. What can you do? kill yourself, or try to enjoy the new vacation in this completely unknow place for you?"---Holland, in the story, is autism, and the trip in the airplane is the pregnancy. I may say that could be the same for cancer. It's a de-tour in your life, and you do will be back on the old road, but...you do will be better. a new person. You'll know how to stop and smell the roses, you'll know that a smile worth more than a diamond ring, and a hug is priceless. You'll see. You will be back on your old road,

willing to share and support whoever else will be at the beginning of this journey. And if you have not Him, ...I pray you will find Him, and the peace that came in believing..

Hey, thank you....I am ok, my husband is a lost cause. I am sorry for him, and pray for his soul a lot. I gave him to the Lord, waiting for a miracle.

love you.....

LucillaJudy G wrote:

TY Lucilla,

I am so sorry for the way your husband handled it..I can't even imagine how it made you feel.

....I'm not so much afraid of dying..and I know this may sound weird.....maybe my way of dealing with it...but I am so mad for it intruding in my life.....my work. How dare it do this.....Christmas is coming.Thanksgiving.....I need to fix the dinner...buy for Christmas...I could just cry......I've done nothing else........but cry.I'm about dry.

I'm always on the move......I had two jobs....I have just quit the one to look for something different...I was working with mentally and physically disabled women...But I had one that bit me once a week.....No.not for meanness......because she got jealous when I paid attention to one of the other ladies or they with me......LOL I love her.......but I just had to make the decision....me or her..LOL

On the weekends.I do demos in the stores here....Ive done this for about 6 years now......I was a hairdresser........got tired of standing for 12 or 14 hours..I had just made up my mind to buy some new supplies and go back into doing nails..and making my jewelry. I also write poetry and short stories..... Oh boy, do I have a couple of poems in me right now..But I'm not sure how to word it without all of the cussing.....

Ty so much for putting me a bit more at ease.......you have NO idea how much better I am starting to feel...I feel like I can beat this thing.....and it not beat me.......

Hugs Lucilla

Judy

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

Dear Judy,

that women die for breast cancer is becaming a myth, just know that. It's a hard fight, and YES, it is possible to lose it, but very rare. There is lot of support out there, and you have no idea of how many women with bc. Still alive, still around, with their hair back, as well as the good living.

I had the surgery for the lympho under my arm, and it happened 1 year and 1/2 ago. So far so good. Once in a while my arm hurts, expecially when I carry the grocery, but I am ok.

Chemo is a sh**. I did chemo on Friday, so I could have the week end to try to be back on my feet. Around the following Tuesday I felt less nauseated, and able to "live". I had four round of chemo, one every 3 weeks. I lost all my hair after the second chemo, but instead of crying I made a joke of that, and I bought myself funny hats. I was wearing (I still do) a pink ribbon all the time, so it happened more than one time that someone in the stores or at church came to me and said "I've been there, be strong you can do it". Actually, to lose the hair is a big deal, but there is nothing you can do about it, so let's trush depression and try to use the thing as a "oh.....no bad hair day for a while", hope it make sense. You do chemo for your own good, to gain chances of no recurrances in the future.

Actually radiation was "horrible" because it made me sooooooooo sleepy!

BUT everything is gone, water under the bridge, and praise the Lord I'm still around so far trying to cheer who is at the beginning of the journey.

You have a good husband, you said. Good for you. Take advantage of that for support. My husband was so piss about the cancer.......he blamed it on me. When I had the lumpectomy, still groggy for the sedation, I had to drive home by myself.

First chemo...oh, that was something. I was crying, of course, really scared. My husband came to the doctor with me.....with his portable computer. While I was crying, he ignored me. The oncologist was so mad that escorted him at the door with a "I believe you can go outside with your business, your wife needs same love now".

Oh well.....

Baby, keep going. It is a hard journey, but you are not alone, and you can do it, as the women in this group. This group is really like family to me.

Besides......hodwy gals, I miss ya all!! lots of love,

LucillaJudy G wrote:

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

Do you Yahoo!?Yahoo! Mail - You care about security. So do we.

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

OF COURSE YOU CAN BEAT THIS THINGS!!

I understand you are a very active person. I wonder (but not willing to know because is your business) if you are a believer. When I was diagnosed with bc I wasn't. I was always on the run, 1000 things that needed to be done "yesterday". I was taking responsability for everyone, doing everybody else job at home, running errands for everybody. And then, I had to slow down because of the cancer. Chemo, radiations, lots of time with myself. And I found Jesus. Now I believe that my cancer has been a way for Jesus to show His glory and grace, because I may die tomorrow.......I am happy with myself. And I have Him. It's about Him, it is not about me. I was born catholic, and raised catholic, and I left the church when I was a teenager. I guess the Lord wanted me home, in a way or another. I don't question anymore. After the bc diagnosis, please believe me, my life changed in better from where I was before. I was buried alive, walking in the dark. Now I have Jesus. I am a new

born, I was told. Yeah.

Anyway.

I have a story. It's about autism (my younger son is autistic). It says : "Lets' say you are planning a beautiful trip to Italy---you go to school, you learn same Italian, you pack cloths for Italian weather, you are dreaming about Italian food and italian museums, squares,old churches and country view. You are in the airplane, thinking that you are so close to get there, your "dream vacation". And then, the airplane land and you are in.......Holland. What can you do? kill yourself, or try to enjoy the new vacation in this completely unknow place for you?"---Holland, in the story, is autism, and the trip in the airplane is the pregnancy. I may say that could be the same for cancer. It's a de-tour in your life, and you do will be back on the old road, but...you do will be better. a new person. You'll know how to stop and smell the roses, you'll know that a smile worth more than a diamond ring, and a hug is priceless. You'll see. You will be back on your old road,

willing to share and support whoever else will be at the beginning of this journey. And if you have not Him, ...I pray you will find Him, and the peace that came in believing..

Hey, thank you....I am ok, my husband is a lost cause. I am sorry for him, and pray for his soul a lot. I gave him to the Lord, waiting for a miracle.

love you.....

LucillaJudy G wrote:

TY Lucilla,

I am so sorry for the way your husband handled it..I can't even imagine how it made you feel.

....I'm not so much afraid of dying..and I know this may sound weird.....maybe my way of dealing with it...but I am so mad for it intruding in my life.....my work. How dare it do this.....Christmas is coming.Thanksgiving.....I need to fix the dinner...buy for Christmas...I could just cry......I've done nothing else........but cry.I'm about dry.

I'm always on the move......I had two jobs....I have just quit the one to look for something different...I was working with mentally and physically disabled women...But I had one that bit me once a week.....No.not for meanness......because she got jealous when I paid attention to one of the other ladies or they with me......LOL I love her.......but I just had to make the decision....me or her..LOL

On the weekends.I do demos in the stores here....Ive done this for about 6 years now......I was a hairdresser........got tired of standing for 12 or 14 hours..I had just made up my mind to buy some new supplies and go back into doing nails..and making my jewelry. I also write poetry and short stories..... Oh boy, do I have a couple of poems in me right now..But I'm not sure how to word it without all of the cussing.....

Ty so much for putting me a bit more at ease.......you have NO idea how much better I am starting to feel...I feel like I can beat this thing.....and it not beat me.......

Hugs Lucilla

Judy

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

Dear Judy,

that women die for breast cancer is becaming a myth, just know that. It's a hard fight, and YES, it is possible to lose it, but very rare. There is lot of support out there, and you have no idea of how many women with bc. Still alive, still around, with their hair back, as well as the good living.

I had the surgery for the lympho under my arm, and it happened 1 year and 1/2 ago. So far so good. Once in a while my arm hurts, expecially when I carry the grocery, but I am ok.

Chemo is a sh**. I did chemo on Friday, so I could have the week end to try to be back on my feet. Around the following Tuesday I felt less nauseated, and able to "live". I had four round of chemo, one every 3 weeks. I lost all my hair after the second chemo, but instead of crying I made a joke of that, and I bought myself funny hats. I was wearing (I still do) a pink ribbon all the time, so it happened more than one time that someone in the stores or at church came to me and said "I've been there, be strong you can do it". Actually, to lose the hair is a big deal, but there is nothing you can do about it, so let's trush depression and try to use the thing as a "oh.....no bad hair day for a while", hope it make sense. You do chemo for your own good, to gain chances of no recurrances in the future.

Actually radiation was "horrible" because it made me sooooooooo sleepy!

BUT everything is gone, water under the bridge, and praise the Lord I'm still around so far trying to cheer who is at the beginning of the journey.

You have a good husband, you said. Good for you. Take advantage of that for support. My husband was so piss about the cancer.......he blamed it on me. When I had the lumpectomy, still groggy for the sedation, I had to drive home by myself.

First chemo...oh, that was something. I was crying, of course, really scared. My husband came to the doctor with me.....with his portable computer. While I was crying, he ignored me. The oncologist was so mad that escorted him at the door with a "I believe you can go outside with your business, your wife needs same love now".

Oh well.....

Baby, keep going. It is a hard journey, but you are not alone, and you can do it, as the women in this group. This group is really like family to me.

Besides......hodwy gals, I miss ya all!! lots of love,

LucillaJudy G wrote:

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

Do you Yahoo!?Yahoo! Mail - You care about security. So do we.

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

OF COURSE YOU CAN BEAT THIS THINGS!!

I understand you are a very active person. I wonder (but not willing to know because is your business) if you are a believer. When I was diagnosed with bc I wasn't. I was always on the run, 1000 things that needed to be done "yesterday". I was taking responsability for everyone, doing everybody else job at home, running errands for everybody. And then, I had to slow down because of the cancer. Chemo, radiations, lots of time with myself. And I found Jesus. Now I believe that my cancer has been a way for Jesus to show His glory and grace, because I may die tomorrow.......I am happy with myself. And I have Him. It's about Him, it is not about me. I was born catholic, and raised catholic, and I left the church when I was a teenager. I guess the Lord wanted me home, in a way or another. I don't question anymore. After the bc diagnosis, please believe me, my life changed in better from where I was before. I was buried alive, walking in the dark. Now I have Jesus. I am a new

born, I was told. Yeah.

Anyway.

I have a story. It's about autism (my younger son is autistic). It says : "Lets' say you are planning a beautiful trip to Italy---you go to school, you learn same Italian, you pack cloths for Italian weather, you are dreaming about Italian food and italian museums, squares,old churches and country view. You are in the airplane, thinking that you are so close to get there, your "dream vacation". And then, the airplane land and you are in.......Holland. What can you do? kill yourself, or try to enjoy the new vacation in this completely unknow place for you?"---Holland, in the story, is autism, and the trip in the airplane is the pregnancy. I may say that could be the same for cancer. It's a de-tour in your life, and you do will be back on the old road, but...you do will be better. a new person. You'll know how to stop and smell the roses, you'll know that a smile worth more than a diamond ring, and a hug is priceless. You'll see. You will be back on your old road,

willing to share and support whoever else will be at the beginning of this journey. And if you have not Him, ...I pray you will find Him, and the peace that came in believing..

Hey, thank you....I am ok, my husband is a lost cause. I am sorry for him, and pray for his soul a lot. I gave him to the Lord, waiting for a miracle.

love you.....

LucillaJudy G wrote:

TY Lucilla,

I am so sorry for the way your husband handled it..I can't even imagine how it made you feel.

....I'm not so much afraid of dying..and I know this may sound weird.....maybe my way of dealing with it...but I am so mad for it intruding in my life.....my work. How dare it do this.....Christmas is coming.Thanksgiving.....I need to fix the dinner...buy for Christmas...I could just cry......I've done nothing else........but cry.I'm about dry.

I'm always on the move......I had two jobs....I have just quit the one to look for something different...I was working with mentally and physically disabled women...But I had one that bit me once a week.....No.not for meanness......because she got jealous when I paid attention to one of the other ladies or they with me......LOL I love her.......but I just had to make the decision....me or her..LOL

On the weekends.I do demos in the stores here....Ive done this for about 6 years now......I was a hairdresser........got tired of standing for 12 or 14 hours..I had just made up my mind to buy some new supplies and go back into doing nails..and making my jewelry. I also write poetry and short stories..... Oh boy, do I have a couple of poems in me right now..But I'm not sure how to word it without all of the cussing.....

Ty so much for putting me a bit more at ease.......you have NO idea how much better I am starting to feel...I feel like I can beat this thing.....and it not beat me.......

Hugs Lucilla

Judy

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

Dear Judy,

that women die for breast cancer is becaming a myth, just know that. It's a hard fight, and YES, it is possible to lose it, but very rare. There is lot of support out there, and you have no idea of how many women with bc. Still alive, still around, with their hair back, as well as the good living.

I had the surgery for the lympho under my arm, and it happened 1 year and 1/2 ago. So far so good. Once in a while my arm hurts, expecially when I carry the grocery, but I am ok.

Chemo is a sh**. I did chemo on Friday, so I could have the week end to try to be back on my feet. Around the following Tuesday I felt less nauseated, and able to "live". I had four round of chemo, one every 3 weeks. I lost all my hair after the second chemo, but instead of crying I made a joke of that, and I bought myself funny hats. I was wearing (I still do) a pink ribbon all the time, so it happened more than one time that someone in the stores or at church came to me and said "I've been there, be strong you can do it". Actually, to lose the hair is a big deal, but there is nothing you can do about it, so let's trush depression and try to use the thing as a "oh.....no bad hair day for a while", hope it make sense. You do chemo for your own good, to gain chances of no recurrances in the future.

Actually radiation was "horrible" because it made me sooooooooo sleepy!

BUT everything is gone, water under the bridge, and praise the Lord I'm still around so far trying to cheer who is at the beginning of the journey.

You have a good husband, you said. Good for you. Take advantage of that for support. My husband was so piss about the cancer.......he blamed it on me. When I had the lumpectomy, still groggy for the sedation, I had to drive home by myself.

First chemo...oh, that was something. I was crying, of course, really scared. My husband came to the doctor with me.....with his portable computer. While I was crying, he ignored me. The oncologist was so mad that escorted him at the door with a "I believe you can go outside with your business, your wife needs same love now".

Oh well.....

Baby, keep going. It is a hard journey, but you are not alone, and you can do it, as the women in this group. This group is really like family to me.

Besides......hodwy gals, I miss ya all!! lots of love,

LucillaJudy G wrote:

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

Do you Yahoo!?Yahoo! Mail - You care about security. So do we.

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

OF COURSE YOU CAN BEAT THIS THINGS!!

I understand you are a very active person. I wonder (but not willing to know because is your business) if you are a believer. When I was diagnosed with bc I wasn't. I was always on the run, 1000 things that needed to be done "yesterday". I was taking responsability for everyone, doing everybody else job at home, running errands for everybody. And then, I had to slow down because of the cancer. Chemo, radiations, lots of time with myself. And I found Jesus. Now I believe that my cancer has been a way for Jesus to show His glory and grace, because I may die tomorrow.......I am happy with myself. And I have Him. It's about Him, it is not about me. I was born catholic, and raised catholic, and I left the church when I was a teenager. I guess the Lord wanted me home, in a way or another. I don't question anymore. After the bc diagnosis, please believe me, my life changed in better from where I was before. I was buried alive, walking in the dark. Now I have Jesus. I am a new

born, I was told. Yeah.

Anyway.

I have a story. It's about autism (my younger son is autistic). It says : "Lets' say you are planning a beautiful trip to Italy---you go to school, you learn same Italian, you pack cloths for Italian weather, you are dreaming about Italian food and italian museums, squares,old churches and country view. You are in the airplane, thinking that you are so close to get there, your "dream vacation". And then, the airplane land and you are in.......Holland. What can you do? kill yourself, or try to enjoy the new vacation in this completely unknow place for you?"---Holland, in the story, is autism, and the trip in the airplane is the pregnancy. I may say that could be the same for cancer. It's a de-tour in your life, and you do will be back on the old road, but...you do will be better. a new person. You'll know how to stop and smell the roses, you'll know that a smile worth more than a diamond ring, and a hug is priceless. You'll see. You will be back on your old road,

willing to share and support whoever else will be at the beginning of this journey. And if you have not Him, ...I pray you will find Him, and the peace that came in believing..

Hey, thank you....I am ok, my husband is a lost cause. I am sorry for him, and pray for his soul a lot. I gave him to the Lord, waiting for a miracle.

love you.....

LucillaJudy G wrote:

TY Lucilla,

I am so sorry for the way your husband handled it..I can't even imagine how it made you feel.

....I'm not so much afraid of dying..and I know this may sound weird.....maybe my way of dealing with it...but I am so mad for it intruding in my life.....my work. How dare it do this.....Christmas is coming.Thanksgiving.....I need to fix the dinner...buy for Christmas...I could just cry......I've done nothing else........but cry.I'm about dry.

I'm always on the move......I had two jobs....I have just quit the one to look for something different...I was working with mentally and physically disabled women...But I had one that bit me once a week.....No.not for meanness......because she got jealous when I paid attention to one of the other ladies or they with me......LOL I love her.......but I just had to make the decision....me or her..LOL

On the weekends.I do demos in the stores here....Ive done this for about 6 years now......I was a hairdresser........got tired of standing for 12 or 14 hours..I had just made up my mind to buy some new supplies and go back into doing nails..and making my jewelry. I also write poetry and short stories..... Oh boy, do I have a couple of poems in me right now..But I'm not sure how to word it without all of the cussing.....

Ty so much for putting me a bit more at ease.......you have NO idea how much better I am starting to feel...I feel like I can beat this thing.....and it not beat me.......

Hugs Lucilla

Judy

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

Dear Judy,

that women die for breast cancer is becaming a myth, just know that. It's a hard fight, and YES, it is possible to lose it, but very rare. There is lot of support out there, and you have no idea of how many women with bc. Still alive, still around, with their hair back, as well as the good living.

I had the surgery for the lympho under my arm, and it happened 1 year and 1/2 ago. So far so good. Once in a while my arm hurts, expecially when I carry the grocery, but I am ok.

Chemo is a sh**. I did chemo on Friday, so I could have the week end to try to be back on my feet. Around the following Tuesday I felt less nauseated, and able to "live". I had four round of chemo, one every 3 weeks. I lost all my hair after the second chemo, but instead of crying I made a joke of that, and I bought myself funny hats. I was wearing (I still do) a pink ribbon all the time, so it happened more than one time that someone in the stores or at church came to me and said "I've been there, be strong you can do it". Actually, to lose the hair is a big deal, but there is nothing you can do about it, so let's trush depression and try to use the thing as a "oh.....no bad hair day for a while", hope it make sense. You do chemo for your own good, to gain chances of no recurrances in the future.

Actually radiation was "horrible" because it made me sooooooooo sleepy!

BUT everything is gone, water under the bridge, and praise the Lord I'm still around so far trying to cheer who is at the beginning of the journey.

You have a good husband, you said. Good for you. Take advantage of that for support. My husband was so piss about the cancer.......he blamed it on me. When I had the lumpectomy, still groggy for the sedation, I had to drive home by myself.

First chemo...oh, that was something. I was crying, of course, really scared. My husband came to the doctor with me.....with his portable computer. While I was crying, he ignored me. The oncologist was so mad that escorted him at the door with a "I believe you can go outside with your business, your wife needs same love now".

Oh well.....

Baby, keep going. It is a hard journey, but you are not alone, and you can do it, as the women in this group. This group is really like family to me.

Besides......hodwy gals, I miss ya all!! lots of love,

LucillaJudy G wrote:

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

Do you Yahoo!?Yahoo! Mail - You care about security. So do we.

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

OF COURSE YOU CAN BEAT THIS THINGS!!

I understand you are a very active person. I wonder (but not willing to know because is your business) if you are a believer. When I was diagnosed with bc I wasn't. I was always on the run, 1000 things that needed to be done "yesterday". I was taking responsability for everyone, doing everybody else job at home, running errands for everybody. And then, I had to slow down because of the cancer. Chemo, radiations, lots of time with myself. And I found Jesus. Now I believe that my cancer has been a way for Jesus to show His glory and grace, because I may die tomorrow.......I am happy with myself. And I have Him. It's about Him, it is not about me. I was born catholic, and raised catholic, and I left the church when I was a teenager. I guess the Lord wanted me home, in a way or another. I don't question anymore. After the bc diagnosis, please believe me, my life changed in better from where I was before. I was buried alive, walking in the dark. Now I have Jesus. I am a new

born, I was told. Yeah.

Anyway.

I have a story. It's about autism (my younger son is autistic). It says : "Lets' say you are planning a beautiful trip to Italy---you go to school, you learn same Italian, you pack cloths for Italian weather, you are dreaming about Italian food and italian museums, squares,old churches and country view. You are in the airplane, thinking that you are so close to get there, your "dream vacation". And then, the airplane land and you are in.......Holland. What can you do? kill yourself, or try to enjoy the new vacation in this completely unknow place for you?"---Holland, in the story, is autism, and the trip in the airplane is the pregnancy. I may say that could be the same for cancer. It's a de-tour in your life, and you do will be back on the old road, but...you do will be better. a new person. You'll know how to stop and smell the roses, you'll know that a smile worth more than a diamond ring, and a hug is priceless. You'll see. You will be back on your old road,

willing to share and support whoever else will be at the beginning of this journey. And if you have not Him, ...I pray you will find Him, and the peace that came in believing..

Hey, thank you....I am ok, my husband is a lost cause. I am sorry for him, and pray for his soul a lot. I gave him to the Lord, waiting for a miracle.

love you.....

LucillaJudy G wrote:

TY Lucilla,

I am so sorry for the way your husband handled it..I can't even imagine how it made you feel.

....I'm not so much afraid of dying..and I know this may sound weird.....maybe my way of dealing with it...but I am so mad for it intruding in my life.....my work. How dare it do this.....Christmas is coming.Thanksgiving.....I need to fix the dinner...buy for Christmas...I could just cry......I've done nothing else........but cry.I'm about dry.

I'm always on the move......I had two jobs....I have just quit the one to look for something different...I was working with mentally and physically disabled women...But I had one that bit me once a week.....No.not for meanness......because she got jealous when I paid attention to one of the other ladies or they with me......LOL I love her.......but I just had to make the decision....me or her..LOL

On the weekends.I do demos in the stores here....Ive done this for about 6 years now......I was a hairdresser........got tired of standing for 12 or 14 hours..I had just made up my mind to buy some new supplies and go back into doing nails..and making my jewelry. I also write poetry and short stories..... Oh boy, do I have a couple of poems in me right now..But I'm not sure how to word it without all of the cussing.....

Ty so much for putting me a bit more at ease.......you have NO idea how much better I am starting to feel...I feel like I can beat this thing.....and it not beat me.......

Hugs Lucilla

Judy

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

Dear Judy,

that women die for breast cancer is becaming a myth, just know that. It's a hard fight, and YES, it is possible to lose it, but very rare. There is lot of support out there, and you have no idea of how many women with bc. Still alive, still around, with their hair back, as well as the good living.

I had the surgery for the lympho under my arm, and it happened 1 year and 1/2 ago. So far so good. Once in a while my arm hurts, expecially when I carry the grocery, but I am ok.

Chemo is a sh**. I did chemo on Friday, so I could have the week end to try to be back on my feet. Around the following Tuesday I felt less nauseated, and able to "live". I had four round of chemo, one every 3 weeks. I lost all my hair after the second chemo, but instead of crying I made a joke of that, and I bought myself funny hats. I was wearing (I still do) a pink ribbon all the time, so it happened more than one time that someone in the stores or at church came to me and said "I've been there, be strong you can do it". Actually, to lose the hair is a big deal, but there is nothing you can do about it, so let's trush depression and try to use the thing as a "oh.....no bad hair day for a while", hope it make sense. You do chemo for your own good, to gain chances of no recurrances in the future.

Actually radiation was "horrible" because it made me sooooooooo sleepy!

BUT everything is gone, water under the bridge, and praise the Lord I'm still around so far trying to cheer who is at the beginning of the journey.

You have a good husband, you said. Good for you. Take advantage of that for support. My husband was so piss about the cancer.......he blamed it on me. When I had the lumpectomy, still groggy for the sedation, I had to drive home by myself.

First chemo...oh, that was something. I was crying, of course, really scared. My husband came to the doctor with me.....with his portable computer. While I was crying, he ignored me. The oncologist was so mad that escorted him at the door with a "I believe you can go outside with your business, your wife needs same love now".

Oh well.....

Baby, keep going. It is a hard journey, but you are not alone, and you can do it, as the women in this group. This group is really like family to me.

Besides......hodwy gals, I miss ya all!! lots of love,

LucillaJudy G wrote:

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

Do you Yahoo!?Yahoo! Mail - You care about security. So do we.

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

OF COURSE YOU CAN BEAT THIS THINGS!!

I understand you are a very active person. I wonder (but not willing to know because is your business) if you are a believer. When I was diagnosed with bc I wasn't. I was always on the run, 1000 things that needed to be done "yesterday". I was taking responsability for everyone, doing everybody else job at home, running errands for everybody. And then, I had to slow down because of the cancer. Chemo, radiations, lots of time with myself. And I found Jesus. Now I believe that my cancer has been a way for Jesus to show His glory and grace, because I may die tomorrow.......I am happy with myself. And I have Him. It's about Him, it is not about me. I was born catholic, and raised catholic, and I left the church when I was a teenager. I guess the Lord wanted me home, in a way or another. I don't question anymore. After the bc diagnosis, please believe me, my life changed in better from where I was before. I was buried alive, walking in the dark. Now I have Jesus. I am a new

born, I was told. Yeah.

Anyway.

I have a story. It's about autism (my younger son is autistic). It says : "Lets' say you are planning a beautiful trip to Italy---you go to school, you learn same Italian, you pack cloths for Italian weather, you are dreaming about Italian food and italian museums, squares,old churches and country view. You are in the airplane, thinking that you are so close to get there, your "dream vacation". And then, the airplane land and you are in.......Holland. What can you do? kill yourself, or try to enjoy the new vacation in this completely unknow place for you?"---Holland, in the story, is autism, and the trip in the airplane is the pregnancy. I may say that could be the same for cancer. It's a de-tour in your life, and you do will be back on the old road, but...you do will be better. a new person. You'll know how to stop and smell the roses, you'll know that a smile worth more than a diamond ring, and a hug is priceless. You'll see. You will be back on your old road,

willing to share and support whoever else will be at the beginning of this journey. And if you have not Him, ...I pray you will find Him, and the peace that came in believing..

Hey, thank you....I am ok, my husband is a lost cause. I am sorry for him, and pray for his soul a lot. I gave him to the Lord, waiting for a miracle.

love you.....

LucillaJudy G wrote:

TY Lucilla,

I am so sorry for the way your husband handled it..I can't even imagine how it made you feel.

....I'm not so much afraid of dying..and I know this may sound weird.....maybe my way of dealing with it...but I am so mad for it intruding in my life.....my work. How dare it do this.....Christmas is coming.Thanksgiving.....I need to fix the dinner...buy for Christmas...I could just cry......I've done nothing else........but cry.I'm about dry.

I'm always on the move......I had two jobs....I have just quit the one to look for something different...I was working with mentally and physically disabled women...But I had one that bit me once a week.....No.not for meanness......because she got jealous when I paid attention to one of the other ladies or they with me......LOL I love her.......but I just had to make the decision....me or her..LOL

On the weekends.I do demos in the stores here....Ive done this for about 6 years now......I was a hairdresser........got tired of standing for 12 or 14 hours..I had just made up my mind to buy some new supplies and go back into doing nails..and making my jewelry. I also write poetry and short stories..... Oh boy, do I have a couple of poems in me right now..But I'm not sure how to word it without all of the cussing.....

Ty so much for putting me a bit more at ease.......you have NO idea how much better I am starting to feel...I feel like I can beat this thing.....and it not beat me.......

Hugs Lucilla

Judy

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

Dear Judy,

that women die for breast cancer is becaming a myth, just know that. It's a hard fight, and YES, it is possible to lose it, but very rare. There is lot of support out there, and you have no idea of how many women with bc. Still alive, still around, with their hair back, as well as the good living.

I had the surgery for the lympho under my arm, and it happened 1 year and 1/2 ago. So far so good. Once in a while my arm hurts, expecially when I carry the grocery, but I am ok.

Chemo is a sh**. I did chemo on Friday, so I could have the week end to try to be back on my feet. Around the following Tuesday I felt less nauseated, and able to "live". I had four round of chemo, one every 3 weeks. I lost all my hair after the second chemo, but instead of crying I made a joke of that, and I bought myself funny hats. I was wearing (I still do) a pink ribbon all the time, so it happened more than one time that someone in the stores or at church came to me and said "I've been there, be strong you can do it". Actually, to lose the hair is a big deal, but there is nothing you can do about it, so let's trush depression and try to use the thing as a "oh.....no bad hair day for a while", hope it make sense. You do chemo for your own good, to gain chances of no recurrances in the future.

Actually radiation was "horrible" because it made me sooooooooo sleepy!

BUT everything is gone, water under the bridge, and praise the Lord I'm still around so far trying to cheer who is at the beginning of the journey.

You have a good husband, you said. Good for you. Take advantage of that for support. My husband was so piss about the cancer.......he blamed it on me. When I had the lumpectomy, still groggy for the sedation, I had to drive home by myself.

First chemo...oh, that was something. I was crying, of course, really scared. My husband came to the doctor with me.....with his portable computer. While I was crying, he ignored me. The oncologist was so mad that escorted him at the door with a "I believe you can go outside with your business, your wife needs same love now".

Oh well.....

Baby, keep going. It is a hard journey, but you are not alone, and you can do it, as the women in this group. This group is really like family to me.

Besides......hodwy gals, I miss ya all!! lots of love,

LucillaJudy G wrote:

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

Do you Yahoo!?Yahoo! Mail - You care about security. So do we.

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

I m.......but doing a lot of battling with all of it right now. Not because of the cancer......other things that have went on on my life....I guess you could say, I am a believer......because I can battle with Him and feel ok with it.

And as for ending up in Holland.....geessss I would stop and smell the Tulips....what wonderful story.

I do take time to smell the roses.........it's just we were starting to get back on our feet.......now this......do you know, I just bought myself a whole bunch of new clothes......for the first time in , I dont know how many years.

Now this.....now I feel so guilty for buying them.I wish I had saved the money...We were going to retire in 3 or 4 years......now as many times before , because of sickness, I may have messed it up.My hubby is almost 63, and it hurts so much seeing him work so hard,, I was doing it for us.

Hey, I worked with one of the sweetest, most darling, she to is autistic....

I love her.........and I was making so much stride with her...I was able to pull her out of where ever she is.....she is 34. I miss them all.

Maybe he will come around one day...I feel so bad you don't have him tho.....TG I have mine.

Hugs

Judy

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

Dear Judy,

that women die for breast cancer is becaming a myth, just know that. It's a hard fight, and YES, it is possible to lose it, but very rare. There is lot of support out there, and you have no idea of how many women with bc. Still alive, still around, with their hair back, as well as the good living.

I had the surgery for the lympho under my arm, and it happened 1 year and 1/2 ago. So far so good. Once in a while my arm hurts, expecially when I carry the grocery, but I am ok.

Chemo is a sh**. I did chemo on Friday, so I could have the week end to try to be back on my feet. Around the following Tuesday I felt less nauseated, and able to "live". I had four round of chemo, one every 3 weeks. I lost all my hair after the second chemo, but instead of crying I made a joke of that, and I bought myself funny hats. I was wearing (I still do) a pink ribbon all the time, so it happened more than one time that someone in the stores or at church came to me and said "I've been there, be strong you can do it". Actually, to lose the hair is a big deal, but there is nothing you can do about it, so let's trush depression and try to use the thing as a "oh.....no bad hair day for a while", hope it make sense. You do chemo for your own good, to gain chances of no recurrances in the future.

Actually radiation was "horrible" because it made me sooooooooo sleepy!

BUT everything is gone, water under the bridge, and praise the Lord I'm still around so far trying to cheer who is at the beginning of the journey.

You have a good husband, you said. Good for you. Take advantage of that for support. My husband was so piss about the cancer.......he blamed it on me. When I had the lumpectomy, still groggy for the sedation, I had to drive home by myself.

First chemo...oh, that was something. I was crying, of course, really scared. My husband came to the doctor with me.....with his portable computer. While I was crying, he ignored me. The oncologist was so mad that escorted him at the door with a "I believe you can go outside with your business, your wife needs same love now".

Oh well.....

Baby, keep going. It is a hard journey, but you are not alone, and you can do it, as the women in this group. This group is really like family to me.

Besides......hodwy gals, I miss ya all!! lots of love,

LucillaJudy G wrote:

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

Do you Yahoo!?Yahoo! Mail - You care about security. So do we.

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

TY Jeana, I didn't think about that...............germs. :-(

Will I be able to drive myself to and fro? I don't want my hubby missing work.nor bothering my brother.he has his hands fulll with the kids.

Hugs

Judy

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

We have one other beautician in this group, she can tell you about getting the use of your arm for that. You have every right to be angry. But save that energy for fighting that damn dragon. Fight with all you have in you. Chemo isnt so bad, they give you anti nausea med to take after each treatment, also they give you some before your IV. It really helps. You may or may not be aboe to continue working through chemo, my Dr didnt want me to work as I worked in retail and he didnt want me around some many people because of the germs. colds cough etc, your immune system is comprimised. Your Dr will be able to tell you more. Hugs Jeana

[Guest guest]

TY Jeana, I didn't think about that...............germs. :-(

Will I be able to drive myself to and fro? I don't want my hubby missing work.nor bothering my brother.he has his hands fulll with the kids.

Hugs

Judy

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

We have one other beautician in this group, she can tell you about getting the use of your arm for that. You have every right to be angry. But save that energy for fighting that damn dragon. Fight with all you have in you. Chemo isnt so bad, they give you anti nausea med to take after each treatment, also they give you some before your IV. It really helps. You may or may not be aboe to continue working through chemo, my Dr didnt want me to work as I worked in retail and he didnt want me around some many people because of the germs. colds cough etc, your immune system is comprimised. Your Dr will be able to tell you more. Hugs Jeana

[Guest guest]

TY Jeana, I didn't think about that...............germs. :-(

Will I be able to drive myself to and fro? I don't want my hubby missing work.nor bothering my brother.he has his hands fulll with the kids.

Hugs

Judy

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

We have one other beautician in this group, she can tell you about getting the use of your arm for that. You have every right to be angry. But save that energy for fighting that damn dragon. Fight with all you have in you. Chemo isnt so bad, they give you anti nausea med to take after each treatment, also they give you some before your IV. It really helps. You may or may not be aboe to continue working through chemo, my Dr didnt want me to work as I worked in retail and he didnt want me around some many people because of the germs. colds cough etc, your immune system is comprimised. Your Dr will be able to tell you more. Hugs Jeana

[Guest guest]

I got really tired during radiation. So my daughter drove me daily.

Jeana

[Guest guest]

Hi there Lynn and Judy,

My name is michelle,and I'm a 39 year old from Australia.

I had a right mascetomy in May this year. I had 15 nodes taken out

with 2 cancerous.

Judy,I wanted to tell you that I have almost full range of my

arm back already. You just need to do your exercises regularly.

The only problem that I have is that I have a cord that won't go

away. Some days its worse than others.

I also had 4 sessions of chemo at 3 weeks apart.

I worked all the way through it,(deli manager) I had my final chemo

3 weeks ago.I had chemo on the Thursday ,had the Friday and weekend

off and went back to work on the Monday.

I had 3 weeks off after I had my mascetomy but I should have

taken more time off then. I was silly and stubborn but it worked out

ok as I always had someone there with me to do all the lifting.It was

kind off hard to reach into the display cabinet though....sometimes I

just couldn't quite grab that meat at the front lol.

Hope everything goes well for both off you.

Warm thoughts go to you both.

> I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY

for all

> of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't

really rude...

> ..just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid

for

> complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

> As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4

1/2 grand

> kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and

one great

> grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And

married

> 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and

loving.....and

> he is scared too....last night he said.. " I don't want to lose you "

That

> hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

> What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and

so MAD at

> this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried

about the

> lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and

make jewelry

> .

> I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

> that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

> My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull

from you

> some of your courage and strength.....

> Love and HUGS

> Judy G

[Guest guest]

Hi there Lynn and Judy,

My name is michelle,and I'm a 39 year old from Australia.

I had a right mascetomy in May this year. I had 15 nodes taken out

with 2 cancerous.

Judy,I wanted to tell you that I have almost full range of my

arm back already. You just need to do your exercises regularly.

The only problem that I have is that I have a cord that won't go

away. Some days its worse than others.

I also had 4 sessions of chemo at 3 weeks apart.

I worked all the way through it,(deli manager) I had my final chemo

3 weeks ago.I had chemo on the Thursday ,had the Friday and weekend

off and went back to work on the Monday.

I had 3 weeks off after I had my mascetomy but I should have

taken more time off then. I was silly and stubborn but it worked out

ok as I always had someone there with me to do all the lifting.It was

kind off hard to reach into the display cabinet though....sometimes I

just couldn't quite grab that meat at the front lol.

Hope everything goes well for both off you.

Warm thoughts go to you both.

> I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY

for all

> of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't

really rude...

> ..just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid

for

> complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

> As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4

1/2 grand

> kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and

one great

> grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And

married

> 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and

loving.....and

> he is scared too....last night he said.. " I don't want to lose you "

That

> hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

> What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and

so MAD at

> this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried

about the

> lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and

make jewelry

> .

> I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

> that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

> My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull

from you

> some of your courage and strength.....

> Love and HUGS

> Judy G

[Guest guest]

TY so much for the info........I hope all remains to go well for you...My thoughts and prayers go with you....

Judy

BIG HUG

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

Hi there Lynn and Judy, My name is michelle,and I'm a 39 year old from Australia. I had a right mascetomy in May this year. I had 15 nodes taken out with 2 cancerous. Judy,I wanted to tell you that I have almost full range of my arm back already. You just need to do your exercises regularly. The only problem that I have is that I have a cord that won't go away. Some days its worse than others. I also had 4 sessions of chemo at 3 weeks apart.I worked all the way through it,(deli manager) I had my final chemo 3 weeks ago.I had chemo on the Thursday ,had the Friday and weekend off and went back to work on the Monday. I had 3 weeks off after I had my mascetomy but I should have taken more time off then. I was silly and stubborn but it worked out ok as I always had someone there with me to do all the lifting.It was kind off hard to reach into the display cabinet though....sometimes I just couldn't quite grab that meat at the front lol. Hope everything goes well for both off you. Warm thoughts go to you both. > I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all> of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude...> ..just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for> complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.> As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand> kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great> grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married> 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and> he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That> hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.> What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at> this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the> lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry> .> I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! > that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..> My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you> some of your courage and strength.....> Love and HUGS> Judy G

[Guest guest]

Beautiful Lucilla...Huggs Lucilla free wrote:

OF COURSE YOU CAN BEAT THIS THINGS!!

I understand you are a very active person. I wonder (but not willing to know because is your business) if you are a believer. When I was diagnosed with bc I wasn't. I was always on the run, 1000 things that needed to be done "yesterday". I was taking responsability for everyone, doing everybody else job at home, running errands for everybody. And then, I had to slow down because of the cancer. Chemo, radiations, lots of time with myself. And I found Jesus. Now I believe that my cancer has been a way for Jesus to show His glory and grace, because I may die tomorrow.......I am happy with myself. And I have Him. It's about Him, it is not about me. I was born catholic, and raised catholic, and I left the church when I was a teenager. I guess the Lord wanted me home, in a way or another. I don't question anymore. After the bc diagnosis, please believe me, my life changed in better from where I was before. I was buried alive, walking in the dark. Now I have Jesus. I am a new

born, I was told. Yeah.

Anyway.

I have a story. It's about autism (my younger son is autistic). It says : "Lets' say you are planning a beautiful trip to Italy---you go to school, you learn same Italian, you pack cloths for Italian weather, you are dreaming about Italian food and italian museums, squares,old churches and country view. You are in the airplane, thinking that you are so close to get there, your "dream vacation". And then, the airplane land and you are in.......Holland. What can you do? kill yourself, or try to enjoy the new vacation in this completely unknow place for you?"---Holland, in the story, is autism, and the trip in the airplane is the pregnancy. I may say that could be the same for cancer. It's a de-tour in your life, and you do will be back on the old road, but...you do will be better. a new person. You'll know how to stop and smell the roses, you'll know that a smile worth more than a diamond ring, and a hug is priceless. You'll see. You will be back on your old road,

willing to share and support whoever else will be at the beginning of this journey. And if you have not Him, ...I pray you will find Him, and the peace that came in believing..

Hey, thank you....I am ok, my husband is a lost cause. I am sorry for him, and pray for his soul a lot. I gave him to the Lord, waiting for a miracle.

love you.....

LucillaJudy G wrote:

TY Lucilla,

I am so sorry for the way your husband handled it..I can't even imagine how it made you feel.

....I'm not so much afraid of dying..and I know this may sound weird.....maybe my way of dealing with it...but I am so mad for it intruding in my life.....my work. How dare it do this.....Christmas is coming.Thanksgiving.....I need to fix the dinner...buy for Christmas...I could just cry......I've done nothing else........but cry.I'm about dry.

I'm always on the move......I had two jobs....I have just quit the one to look for something different...I was working with mentally and physically disabled women...But I had one that bit me once a week.....No.not for meanness......because she got jealous when I paid attention to one of the other ladies or they with me......LOL I love her.......but I just had to make the decision....me or her..LOL

On the weekends.I do demos in the stores here....Ive done this for about 6 years now......I was a hairdresser........got tired of standing for 12 or 14 hours..I had just made up my mind to buy some new supplies and go back into doing nails..and making my jewelry. I also write poetry and short stories..... Oh boy, do I have a couple of poems in me right now..But I'm not sure how to word it without all of the cussing.....

Ty so much for putting me a bit more at ease.......you have NO idea how much better I am starting to feel...I feel like I can beat this thing.....and it not beat me.......

Hugs Lucilla

Judy

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

Dear Judy,

that women die for breast cancer is becaming a myth, just know that. It's a hard fight, and YES, it is possible to lose it, but very rare. There is lot of support out there, and you have no idea of how many women with bc. Still alive, still around, with their hair back, as well as the good living.

I had the surgery for the lympho under my arm, and it happened 1 year and 1/2 ago. So far so good. Once in a while my arm hurts, expecially when I carry the grocery, but I am ok.

Chemo is a sh**. I did chemo on Friday, so I could have the week end to try to be back on my feet. Around the following Tuesday I felt less nauseated, and able to "live". I had four round of chemo, one every 3 weeks. I lost all my hair after the second chemo, but instead of crying I made a joke of that, and I bought myself funny hats. I was wearing (I still do) a pink ribbon all the time, so it happened more than one time that someone in the stores or at church came to me and said "I've been there, be strong you can do it". Actually, to lose the hair is a big deal, but there is nothing you can do about it, so let's trush depression and try to use the thing as a "oh.....no bad hair day for a while", hope it make sense. You do chemo for your own good, to gain chances of no recurrances in the future.

Actually radiation was "horrible" because it made me sooooooooo sleepy!

BUT everything is gone, water under the bridge, and praise the Lord I'm still around so far trying to cheer who is at the beginning of the journey.

You have a good husband, you said. Good for you. Take advantage of that for support. My husband was so piss about the cancer.......he blamed it on me. When I had the lumpectomy, still groggy for the sedation, I had to drive home by myself.

First chemo...oh, that was something. I was crying, of course, really scared. My husband came to the doctor with me.....with his portable computer. While I was crying, he ignored me. The oncologist was so mad that escorted him at the door with a "I believe you can go outside with your business, your wife needs same love now".

Oh well.....

Baby, keep going. It is a hard journey, but you are not alone, and you can do it, as the women in this group. This group is really like family to me.

Besides......hodwy gals, I miss ya all!! lots of love,

LucillaJudy G wrote:

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

Do you Yahoo!?Yahoo! Mail - You care about security. So do we.

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Beautiful Lucilla...Huggs Lucilla free wrote:

OF COURSE YOU CAN BEAT THIS THINGS!!

I understand you are a very active person. I wonder (but not willing to know because is your business) if you are a believer. When I was diagnosed with bc I wasn't. I was always on the run, 1000 things that needed to be done "yesterday". I was taking responsability for everyone, doing everybody else job at home, running errands for everybody. And then, I had to slow down because of the cancer. Chemo, radiations, lots of time with myself. And I found Jesus. Now I believe that my cancer has been a way for Jesus to show His glory and grace, because I may die tomorrow.......I am happy with myself. And I have Him. It's about Him, it is not about me. I was born catholic, and raised catholic, and I left the church when I was a teenager. I guess the Lord wanted me home, in a way or another. I don't question anymore. After the bc diagnosis, please believe me, my life changed in better from where I was before. I was buried alive, walking in the dark. Now I have Jesus. I am a new

born, I was told. Yeah.

Anyway.

I have a story. It's about autism (my younger son is autistic). It says : "Lets' say you are planning a beautiful trip to Italy---you go to school, you learn same Italian, you pack cloths for Italian weather, you are dreaming about Italian food and italian museums, squares,old churches and country view. You are in the airplane, thinking that you are so close to get there, your "dream vacation". And then, the airplane land and you are in.......Holland. What can you do? kill yourself, or try to enjoy the new vacation in this completely unknow place for you?"---Holland, in the story, is autism, and the trip in the airplane is the pregnancy. I may say that could be the same for cancer. It's a de-tour in your life, and you do will be back on the old road, but...you do will be better. a new person. You'll know how to stop and smell the roses, you'll know that a smile worth more than a diamond ring, and a hug is priceless. You'll see. You will be back on your old road,

willing to share and support whoever else will be at the beginning of this journey. And if you have not Him, ...I pray you will find Him, and the peace that came in believing..

Hey, thank you....I am ok, my husband is a lost cause. I am sorry for him, and pray for his soul a lot. I gave him to the Lord, waiting for a miracle.

love you.....

LucillaJudy G wrote:

TY Lucilla,

I am so sorry for the way your husband handled it..I can't even imagine how it made you feel.

....I'm not so much afraid of dying..and I know this may sound weird.....maybe my way of dealing with it...but I am so mad for it intruding in my life.....my work. How dare it do this.....Christmas is coming.Thanksgiving.....I need to fix the dinner...buy for Christmas...I could just cry......I've done nothing else........but cry.I'm about dry.

I'm always on the move......I had two jobs....I have just quit the one to look for something different...I was working with mentally and physically disabled women...But I had one that bit me once a week.....No.not for meanness......because she got jealous when I paid attention to one of the other ladies or they with me......LOL I love her.......but I just had to make the decision....me or her..LOL

On the weekends.I do demos in the stores here....Ive done this for about 6 years now......I was a hairdresser........got tired of standing for 12 or 14 hours..I had just made up my mind to buy some new supplies and go back into doing nails..and making my jewelry. I also write poetry and short stories..... Oh boy, do I have a couple of poems in me right now..But I'm not sure how to word it without all of the cussing.....

Ty so much for putting me a bit more at ease.......you have NO idea how much better I am starting to feel...I feel like I can beat this thing.....and it not beat me.......

Hugs Lucilla

Judy

-- Re: Thank you for all of your warmness and welcome

Dear Judy,

that women die for breast cancer is becaming a myth, just know that. It's a hard fight, and YES, it is possible to lose it, but very rare. There is lot of support out there, and you have no idea of how many women with bc. Still alive, still around, with their hair back, as well as the good living.

I had the surgery for the lympho under my arm, and it happened 1 year and 1/2 ago. So far so good. Once in a while my arm hurts, expecially when I carry the grocery, but I am ok.

Chemo is a sh**. I did chemo on Friday, so I could have the week end to try to be back on my feet. Around the following Tuesday I felt less nauseated, and able to "live". I had four round of chemo, one every 3 weeks. I lost all my hair after the second chemo, but instead of crying I made a joke of that, and I bought myself funny hats. I was wearing (I still do) a pink ribbon all the time, so it happened more than one time that someone in the stores or at church came to me and said "I've been there, be strong you can do it". Actually, to lose the hair is a big deal, but there is nothing you can do about it, so let's trush depression and try to use the thing as a "oh.....no bad hair day for a while", hope it make sense. You do chemo for your own good, to gain chances of no recurrances in the future.

Actually radiation was "horrible" because it made me sooooooooo sleepy!

BUT everything is gone, water under the bridge, and praise the Lord I'm still around so far trying to cheer who is at the beginning of the journey.

You have a good husband, you said. Good for you. Take advantage of that for support. My husband was so piss about the cancer.......he blamed it on me. When I had the lumpectomy, still groggy for the sedation, I had to drive home by myself.

First chemo...oh, that was something. I was crying, of course, really scared. My husband came to the doctor with me.....with his portable computer. While I was crying, he ignored me. The oncologist was so mad that escorted him at the door with a "I believe you can go outside with your business, your wife needs same love now".

Oh well.....

Baby, keep going. It is a hard journey, but you are not alone, and you can do it, as the women in this group. This group is really like family to me.

Besides......hodwy gals, I miss ya all!! lots of love,

LucillaJudy G wrote:

I am not getting messages, so I am replying to all that replied..TY for all of your warm welcomes....The women in that chat room, weren't really rude......just ..I really don't know what they were.....I just felt stupid for complaining and that my feelings were somehow not valid.

As I said........my name is Judy, I'm 56 years old, one son and 4 1/2 grand kids..My brothers kids all me grandma so I have 4 others.......and one great grand child............Wow, I didn't realize just how old I am..And married 36 years..to a wonderful man. He is being so supportive and loving.....and he is scared too....last night he said.." I don't want to lose you" That hurt me more than anything.....seeing the fear in his eyes.

What I am most concerned about is the Chemo....I need to work and so MAD at this time of year, I don't know if I will be able...Im worried about the lymph node operation.....if it will ruin my arm...I do hair and make jewelry..

I am just so damn angry.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that this creature has stopped my life right in its tracks..

My heart goes out to each and everyone of you..I hope I can pull from you some of your courage and strength.....

Love and HUGS

Judy G

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