OT but gonna blow

August 2, 2004

Why is it that Bi_polor ADHD people cannot just sit quietly, I,m about to shoot My husband, He is driving me crazy he is on another roller coaster ride and draggin me with it ,

I,msitting there on my front porch reading a book, he comes out sits down with a book and in 5 mins he,s up and demanding I go clean out the garage, he wants it done NOW !!!!! I get up go out to the garage than I realize , what am I doing,I dont, want to be doing this, weh ave no where to toss anything he informs me he will toss stuff into the garbager cans I look at him and tell him you cann,t do that wehave to have a dumpster, which we cannot afford, I told him I,m going back to the front porch to sit in my chair and read a good book, and I,m tired of him always going into manic modes and bossing me around telling me what to do, I,m sick of him picking out my clothes telling me what to wear , what to eat, hogging the TV, I,m tired of his wandering around his bad attitude and him chasing off my friends , I told him you want to clean this you do it your self cause this mess was caused by upi amd you bi-plor nut wacko buddy who just tossed all this stuff in here when we moved breaking almost all my china, never stacking the boxes neatly as they were brought in, and I told him you better not bring any of this into my nice clean house , ths stuff is out here cause we have a very small house, and everything I need inside ,

so back off leave me alone and set your life straight cause I,m sick of you ruining my life , I can,t pick up any boxes I have not the strength not to mention I shouldn,t even be out here in all this dirt and dust ,

and walked off,

He can,t sit still for 5 mins unless the TV is one, as long as the TV is on he won,t budge, as a matter of fact one cannot even talk to him he don,t hear you if the TV is on, I,m so sick of his mouth , I,m tired of having no friends, he even ran my Pastor off, I spendt all morning cleaning my house, I need to rest, he hates seeing me sit down, it bugs him that I,m not kissing his ass, I,m tired of him saying he don,t lie fruit juice and milk and fresh vegies then eating all my fresh veggies drinking my milk and my fresh juices and leaving me with nothing while he ahs a pitcherof coolo-aide sitting in the fridge, his mother is the same way , eat up everything in the house make sure no body else get,s anything,I stabbed his mother with a fork in her hand I didn,t draw blood I just made my point one time when I caught her snagging food off my grandaughters plate, another time last thanksgiving she was stealing my nieces soda from the fridge when I caught her she is on restricted intake I snatched it out of her hand and yelled at her, Later Bill did the same thing we caught him after he had downed 4 cans of the girls fruit punch same day , it was Thanksgiving. 18 years of this, I,m to old , I,m ready to change my life , and get rid of the major stress HIM!!!

Let us run with endurance the racethat is set before us Hebrews 12:1

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August 2, 2004

Thank Debs, Like my mom told me this morning, Hon, he will not change , you married into a family of people with a serious history of generational abuse and mental illness , she told me if you had known 18 years ago and someone had taken the time to tell you of the abuse and mental Illness before the marriage you would have not married him but, you got roped in, she told me all you can do is pray for God,s grace and protection hope for the best and let,s hope for the best,

seems like alot of people in his family on his mothers side have ended up dead violently or in mental hospitals , I am currently working with his sister and the system to get his mother declared incompatant and commited, prblem is she has been in 3 care units anll tossed her out , and non eof the assisted living facilities will take her so She is living with and I have shared custody of my nieces it was that or CSD was going to take the girls because of Arlisses abuse.

Bill is much like his mother I know it was not his fault , she abused him alot not as in the way she abused laura she was beaten , kicked hit , no , she abused Bennie and bill sexually and other wise, they were her handsome little men, she hates female competition, Poor Bill, to have adhd be BI-polor

socially regressed , pretty much only able to function at 6th grade level and have to deal with her man, I,m glad I was blessed with fairly normal family...

but, I,m trying so hard to understand and stand by him yet my health is so poor and so much stress is not good fr me, I ,m so trying hard,

Prayer I know is the key and I believe strongly in the power of prayer.

I need to ask God,s forgivens for my little pity party today and gather my wits,

Let us run with endurance the racethat is set before us Hebrews 12:1

RE: OT but gonna blow

Oh ,

I'm so sorry you're haveing such a hard time. I've had the same feelings before, but I stuck it out and now I'm so glad I did. I don't know what to say, but just wanted to let you know you'll be in my prayers.

Blessings,

Debbie K.

-----Original Message-----From: her_fathers_eyes Sent: Monday, August 02, 2004 3:22 PMTo: The_Thyroid_Support_Group Subject: OT but gonna blow

Why is it that Bi_polor ADHD people cannot just sit quietly, I,m about to shoot My husband, He is driving me crazy he is on another roller coaster ride and draggin me with it ,

August 2, 2004